The Spoony Experiment

Quarantine Review (10-12-08)

by Scarlett on October 12, 2008 · View Comments


I’ve got a headache, and Quarantine is to blame!

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  • mckaysproductions
    Yeah i seen it too. Fucking awful film but i have to say i did like the smashing a zombie with a lense IDEA if it was put it a good movie where it broke the camera and they had a back up like Diary of the dead.
    By the way if you want to the a POV movie done perfectly watch Diary of the Dead i'd give it a 10/10 it's truely amazing and tops all other POV movies in my opinion.
    I'm still after all these months pissed off that the ending was the fucking poster and trailer, seriously how does someone get away with that?
  • Derekofthedead
    I have to agree, this movie just hurt my feelings. Well I'm here to report that it seems as though this message may have gotten though to whoever decided this film would be a good idea. I know you did not like [Rec] but it seems as though it did so very well it was able to spawn a sequel, which i just got through watching. After watching [Rec]2, it suddenly occurred to me that Quarantine may not be as benign as i had hoped it would be. After checking IMBD it there is no hint of a Quarantine 2! (insert angelic choir here)
    Although i have a feeling its not for the fact this movie was so damn high on the fail scale. Personally i don't think this movie would make it past anyone in hollywood due to the heavy religious overtones. unless of-course they can make up some odd excuse as to why certain events in [Rec]2 can be attributes to rabies. But in my mind id like to think we won a small victory for smart movie goers everywhere when they decided not bastardize the series any further. I know you don't like POV films as of Cloverfeild but i felt [Rec]2 exceeded the original. Granted it has its dumb moments that make you question the size of the bus the characters in the film take. There are some Nice money shots and some pretty awesome twists toward the end. I recommend it if you find yourself with nothing else better to do.
    thanks for the time and the great videos!
  • Charos
    Great review as always man...I have to say, I liked REC, I thought (which being lower budget) that it built up the tension well, and by the last 20 minutes the pitch just goes through the roof. Besides, whoever the reporter was in that movie was bloody hot. Also, I can't remember if this is Quarantine or REC but in one or both it mentions that the infection depends on blood type, some will turn quick and others very slow...

    However, I completely agree with the vast majority of what you said, Quarantine was like watching REC with a bunch of people from GQ and Guys Quarterly tossed in to replace the characters, The suspense simply never picks up. We have a group of people, very quickly shit goes down and everyone's freaking out, it's that "gimme now" mentality that I find just awful in our culture (North American, we Canadians are just as guilty as anyone)...we don't see absolute brilliant and utterly horrific movies like The Brood by Cronenberg (which honestly spends 90% of the movie setting up the last 15 minutes and by that point you can barely look at the screen from how horrific everything is), Audition or Jacob's Ladder...if you WANT that over the top feel, and you're having fun with it ("Tokyo Gore Police" and Ichi the Killer I'm lookin' at you, or even classics like Evil Dead 2. But I miss the days of having a horror story start off and slowly, methodically turning up the tension WORKS...it's an effective means to actually, truly scare someone without resorting to a bunch of "bus" gags (anyone who saw Cat people knows what I'm talking about)...ah well, I guess it's like old Jim Henson puppetry, Dark Crystal would never happen today, it'd be all CGI, and lose almost all it's appeal.

    Again, killer review, keep it up man.
  • fedora
    God, Quarantine was such an awful movie. I thought it was terrible from the start, seeing as the intro while they were "getting the scoop" on the firemen was so long an drawn out. The beginning was very boring and a complete waste of my time. Really, I didn't really care what the hell was going on with the firemen, but they just kept going on and on. If I cared about what the firemen were doing, i'd go looking it up on Google, but I don't want to sit through hearing this crap I don't care about when I came here to watch a fucking zombie movie.

    So I was kind of pissed off with it from the start. And I thought, "Well maybe once they get to the actual scene and the zombies start showing up it'll get better." BUT. IT. DIDN'T. It progressively got worse throughout the entire movie. The script was stupid, making it seem like all the characters were fucking idiots, the lighting was so dim throughout the whole movie you can barely process what's going on, and the story line of a zombie epidemic coming around and it spreads only if you are bitten by the zombie and everyone ends up dying it such a reaccuring plot nowadays that it's getting rather boring and predictable. They could've switched it up a bit with this movie, but all they really did was confine the zombie epidemic into a SMALLER area. There is a zombie epidemic going around in one building, and that's where most of the movie takes place. It's so confined and claustrophobic this way. I know there have been other movies like this, but this film is shot so badly that it makes everything worse.

    This was probably one of the worst zombie movies i've ever seen. And there are some pretty terrible zombie movies out there. I wish I hadn't wasted my time watching this. Especially since all my friends and I already knew pretty much exactly how the movie was played out. But we were foolish and naiive and wanted to know just how bad this movie was. And it was probably worse than our expectations. Complete waste of time.
  • Journeyman0186
    Approx. 6:50 minutes into the review, "Fuck that shit! Put two in his ten spot." I've never heard it phrased quite that way before. Bravo sir. I will be laughing about that line until I go to sleep tonight. Kudos!
  • Garth's Brownie Girl
    I have to say first that I have kind of a soft spot for this movie because I watched it on my birthday, but even so while I was watching it I was the only one laughing while the rest of the theater was scared. XD
  • bowrider
    Spoony's imitation was 100 times better than the actual movie. I laughed so hard I was crying! awesome review.
  • I Have Just Finished Watching It Aswell And It IS !FUCKING HORRIBLE! as you said. Dont You Think It Is Funny As Fuck When They Are All Running Up Stairs Away From The ZOMBIES Coming From The Place Were They Are Treating Wounded,It Looks Like A Game Of Hide And Seek!
  • Bizam
    ok what the hell, I just watched [REC] after seeing people say how much better it was.

    It's the same fucking movie guys. Almost exactly fucking identical. There is like 3 little things that I was like "ok this is a bit different" on, but most of the scenes are so completely the same I felt like the actors were interchangeable. Quarantine is pretty much just a dub, same movie with english actors.
  • MaxieMan
    I thought it was entertaining. Only because I just like watching zombies be zombies so I got past most of the bullshit.

    Fuck yes zombies. Ending was completely stupid though no redeeming that.
  • dado
    i used to get pissed off about how all these bad movies get released, especially ones like the crystal skull. But now i know after each bad movie ill get the funniest review.

    Thanks spooney
  • jv9291
    I warned my family and some of my friends about this movie. I told them how bad it was. I broke several rules regarding swear words in my classrooms after seeing it. I showed them Spoony's review. I showed the trailer and poster and said "there is the movie. Watch [REC]." I still rage about how awful this movie is. I'd rather watch Transformers 2 than this crap fest. AND THEY ALL STILL WENT AND WATCHED IT! ONE OF MY FRIENDS EVEN SAID THAT HE LIKED IT AND BROUGHT IT TO SCHOOL!!!!! MY SISTER BOUGHT IT NEW WHEN BOTH I AND MY AUNT (who likes any sort of movie that comes out) SAID THAT IT WAS AWFUL!!!!!!!
  • Skywalkersc
    i just saw the european version and holy shit the asian family is so annoying actually every character get's annoying really fast and even if they would be likable you wouldnt care if they die because they die so fast you ca't even really realize it
  • Jonathon
    man, just watched this movie on netflix....too right, this was the worst movie ive ever seen, at first i was oh, cool its like Left 4 Dead, since the zombies in that game are also infected with rabies, albeit an advanced strain, and even the last zombie, the chick, reminded me on the witch, the way she attacked, but other then that, if was just a lame attempt at a POV hauntedhouse style movie, 99% of the scares are predictable, and the ending...really? that was it, why not just kill everyone off in the first half hour and make it a shitty made for tv movie? the whole POV was another stupid thing, yes, cloverfield is so far the best movie ive seen to use that style, and this movie is just trying to rake in on that, im done ranting, lol
  • bmoore4026
    Spoony burping was my favorite part! :D
  • djw175
    my resonse to the situation: nuke the building!
  • Sverrir Geir
    That movis was so fucking awful. But we have to remember that the POV camera thing actually works for somethings like Peep Show.
  • Nick
    REC had a very good ending in my eyes, really effective. But the rest of the movie wasn't that good, pretty typical stuff when it comes to zombie movies. Quarantine... I make it a rule to never EVER watch American remakes unless i hear good things about it from people whos opinions i respect.
  • BJB Digital
    First off Cloverfield was absolutely not "great", or even good. It attempted to broaden the scope, and depth capable of POV films, but fell face first off a cliff. The only thing "great" was the marketing, and the ARG. It was a messy, jarring, and boring film that spent more time on developing cookie cutter characters then actually granting entertainment. Children of Men is a great film while Cloverfield was nothing more then a waste of time.

    Spoony was spot on with almost every single problem this film had, as well as previous POV films. It's unfortunate that these type of films always sound so much better then they ever turn out. Suspension of disbelief is hard enough to craft in a regular film, so it would take a complete genius of a director to create it in a POV film. While some of the comments Spoony made are a bit exaggerated, I can't say I blame him since I was pissed as well when I exited the theater after this piece of shit.
  • Louis Williams
    Your dead-on right there dude!

    When they stand in the lobby, super-rabies-zombies in the garage, mum super-rabies-zombie on the stairs and a ton of them upstairs.... who decides to try and get to the attic??

    Worst yet, did they just tell everyone who was infected at that point to go mad and run around screaming?

    If you watch - there is one who flails his arm, runs into a wall and then darts into an empty room.... huh??

    I laughed soo hard I cried - and I don't even have tear ducts. It's that bad
  • Sultan
    you are so right, i fucking hated quarantine
  • Jacob
    you almost got kicked out for making fun of THIS movie??

    wow, they did nothing when me and my friend bashed Eragon... well halfway through the movie everybody was talking on cell phones and shit, nobody paid attention.

    And of course I got everyone to laugh when he said those magic words and shot the arrow. Go watch that scene. You see the arrow drop right off the bow while the magic darts forward... so I stood up and shouted "BULLSHIT! That arrow went down on the bridge!"
  • letterizer
    he forgot the fucking pace of the movie at the start when i saw it i said "GODDANM GET ON WITH IT"
  • mark2000
    this is probably my most favorite spoony Vlog. I do not know if you made a script for this but you definitely made me laugh my ass off almost the entire video.
  • movie buff 344
    this movie was ass i got sick watching it and its very predictable
  • Zach
    @robisalive;

    I'm sure it was an advil. You honestly need it after seeing this movie. It gives you such a headache, especially after the first...hour or so. "OMFG we're all gonna die! WE'RE ALL GOING TO FUCKING DIE!!!" and the camera woman at the end "OMG keep the light on me! KEEP THE LIGHT ON ME!!!!" Sure! Lemme just get a fucking light to begin with, you dumb bimbo >_<
  • superking
    This movie was horrible, and it also gave me a wicked headache afterward. I absolutely hated this movie, and I thought it was one of the worst movies in recent history. Side Note: It was shakier than all other shaky movies put together
  • Adune Stormwind
    The type of camera work, excessive shaking and indicernable close ups seems to be camera work that Michael Bay is obsessed with
  • robisalive
    just rented this because i couldn't find any other horror flick at my local store (fuck blockbuster and hollywood video, corporate swine!!!) and....yea. even the cover of the dvd gave away the ending. but on a more important note....was spoony popin a pill in this review??
  • Draxo
    You were 100% right about this movie.
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