To understand why Final Fantasy VIII sucks so hard, you need to take a trip back to the past– 2000 years into the past, to be exact. But will we be able to get back to the future with our sanity intact?
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April Fool’s Edit: Okay, in case the joke was over your head, it was that I was doing an exaggerated, manic review of a classic, good game. I was parodying my own style in overanalyzing the plot of a game during a time when games basically had plots no more complex than “your girlfriend was punched in the stomach and kidnapped.” I’m a little surprised people weren’t able to pick up the extremely thickly-trawled layer of sarcasm over my usual tone of voice (“OOOOOOOH, that’ll pay the rent!”) and my rant about “what could possibly stop the lady made of fire who throws fire,” but I guess that’s the fun of April Fool’s, that some people will believe anything.
This was essentially my way of doing a funny review of a good game, and seeing who would take the flamebait. The “Rise of Insano” sketch is a possible origin story, since the origins of Doctor Insano are shrouded in mystery and may never be truly known.
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Awesome review and May I say I agree Four Orbs god why didn’t they just make another go get the blue key for the blue door quests what a bunch of hacks.
Oh i fucking LOVE these Final Fantasy reviews, i mean it, hope you keep doing them, and even FF7 maybe!…. And with that being said, i really loved final fantasy 8, and still do, but these reviews are so spot on!!
Salute from sweden.
Oh god, I want your shirt. ._. The phantasmagoria reviews are the best reviews I have ever read or seen in my entire life. Kudos man, Kudos.
Oh come on, what wrong with Rob Schneider
..holy crap. Was your April Fools edit a shot at Final Fantasy Tactics? XD (The point in the beginning of the game where Princess Olivia is kidnapped by Delita knocking her out with a punch to the gut. Granted, not exactly Ramsa’s girlfriend…..)
What the fuck Shinizaru? Were you born in the year 2000? It’s obviously a Double Dragon reference…
You guys know you can buy that shirt if you like it some much.
http://www.printfection.com/spoonyexperiment/Mens-Apparel/_s_170617
Not saying I like it enough to spend 18 bucks on one, but maybe you guys will.
P.S All you had to do was go to the Store options on the main page.
You’re all a bunch of fucking idiots.
DURR HURR SPOONY IS TROLL.
He’s making a goddamn JOKE.
What, do you watch stand-up comedians and rage?
A STARBUCKS ACROSS THE STREET FROM A STARBUCKS?
FUCK THAT SHIT IF I DON’T COMPLAIN PEOPLE WILL THINK THAT I DON’T GET IT!
M.
The irony of you making a “nobody cares” jab is too good. Is it still April 1st where you’re from?
From the point of view of today’s games, this is pretty spot-on, even for being a joke.
From the point of view of history… It’s a joke. Over-the-top, angry-ranting joke. And it was quite funny – more the quiet chuckle/smirk funny, as opposed to the belly-laugh funny, but I prefer that sort of funny anyway. Final Fantasy was one of the first of it’s kind (if not the first), so of course it wasn’t perfect!!
Brilliant, Spoony. Absolutely brilliant. Couldn’t have asked for a better video for April Fools. :3
One note about the original NES Final Fantasy: though elements tended to have a strength, they didn’t really have a weakness. You could use the Flame Saber on fire enemies, the Ice Sword on ice/water enemies, and so on, and they’d still do pretty hefty damage. Using the proper elements only netted a slight increase, on average. It was actually better to choose weapons based on their attack power rather than their elemental strengths because of this. Weird, huh? X3
There’s one fatal flaw with this as an April Fool’s video: As a 21 year old whose first Final Fantasy was 10 and never gone back to the prior games, and as a loyal follower of your video game reviews who has seen you make similar rants in similar games, the issue is that in hindsight, THESE DO SEEM FUCKING RETARDED.
I’m also one of those gamers who never really enjoyed RPG’s until Final Fantasy VII came around, and even then it was still crap. RPG’s before that, and looking back at what I missed, I realize I haven’t missed much, which is fine by me. I’ll stick with to the Elder Scrolls, thank you very much.
Funny review as always Spoony. I like Final Fantasy mostly because with out it there wouldn’t be an FF 7 or anything else by the company because Final Fantasy was their last game and it sold and kept the company from going under. I will admit that I like the remakes a little bit better than the original NES version because of the combat shifting to the next enemy but mostly because of the magic system being spells per dayish instead of using MP system. Have you thought about maybe doing a breif review of the rest of FF8?
I like to believe Doctor Insano is in the distant future in an alternate demension created by an April fools joke gone wrong with theoretical temporal distortion. Sending his messegaes back in time through a rift he created to modern day spoony
That was awesome. You should do more reviews like this. This was possibly one of my favorites you have done, after Zamurai Zombie Nation, of course.
Ha, I agreed joke or not!
It didn’t make me dislike the game any, but clarified the unclassifiable by explaining the plot thrown together from an acid trip.
Time travel in video games… Only worked in Okami and Legacy of Kain: Blood Omen (AND THAT ONE ALONE).
I forgot to mention, it is possible to finish the game with white mages cuz you can find a sword called the MASMUNE in the final dungeon where all you need to do in one part is go riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight for 5 minutes to enter a room that has a chest. inside the chest is the masmune sword. With it one white wizard can use it and can do damage like a knight can.
Yeah, equip one of your white wizards with the masamune and have her attack / heal, alternating as necessary. The rest should cast holy (fade in the original NES version). I did the whole white wizard run, and I have to say, it was as stupid, frustrating, and unfulfilling as I thought it would be. So I went back to the beginning and played with a nice, balanced party to wash the dumb out of my memory. Maybe those kind of challenge runs are okay for some, but I ultimately didn’t see the point. And yes, I finished the game.
At any rate, the original FF was a great, classic game, one that I still play to this day (with a reasonably balanced party).
Anyway, great April Fool’s joke. Keep the FF8 reviews coming, Spoony, they’re awesome!
Let’s Fall Asleep During Final Fantasy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=10qV_trdonw
@ Earthbound_X: Most recently, the 9th part of FF VIII review and the recent movie reviews. They’re not bad, but the snark is gone and it feels forced at times. And I hate to say it, but Spoony sounds like a pussy sometimes. His written material is awesome, back when he was writing it was no mercy, no shame, no apologies. It’s a lot more tame now, and as a result, a lot more boring. He used to piss off fanboys all the time, but now he has his own fanboy cult, so he has to watch what he says.
the confusing bit is that final fantasy really is stupid, really has always been stupid, and everything you mock in the video is ripe for mockery.
i didn’t get an april fool’s vibe and it seems to me like you meant everything you said in the video, which i have no problem with whatsoever.
First let me start by saying, im working on beating FFVIII and i think you need to do a review on the FF that gave you your name.
The challenge is on!!!
Dude I just learnt a shocking truth about Final Fantasy VIII. Did you know that in the first three(yes three) weeks of it’s release, it earned fifty million dollars. FIFTY MILLION DOLLARS! That’s impressive even for a digital pile of chocobo dung.
P.S. That sketch you did with future Dr Insano is very much like the plot to Time Splitters Future Perfect.
Oh cool, Carcassonne!
Nice vid, funny as always. However, as for the April Fools part? Err…? Now I won’t lie, I haven’t played the first Final Fantasy, it was before my time. However, I know for a fact that the fanbase and some of the old school fans have nothing but contempt for it. A lot of people only think the series became good starting with Final Fantasy IV and onwards. Given that, I don’t see how it was that obvious that you actually liked FF? And then you tried to make out it was obvious when you were doing a parody of ‘yourself’ which contrary to what you say I found was not exaggerated whatsoever? I mean you’re always that crazy in your overanalysis with FFVIII, dude. But it’s your style and it’s hilarious ;)
Well you’ve already done FFVII so I think this would have made more sense if you attacked FFIV, my favourite in the franchise and your very namesake. Or maybe if you had the balls FFVI… because I’m sure the anti-FFVII brigade would have taken some time out of their busy schedule jacking off to Kefka and throwing darts at pictures of Sephiroth cursing ‘Final Fantasy VII is fucking overrated’ over and over to find out where you live and set your house alight. That would have been some real ‘flamebait’ for ya, hehehehe…. as Kefka would say “Welcome to my barbeque!” hehehe.
Keep up with the reviews, anyways. They’re hilarious, man. Peace.
Very nice. I actually found the satire a bit subtle at first…and in fact you raised some pretty good arguments about the original Final Fantasy. Of course, the series got much better with IV and VI.
One thing that always gets me when I’m watching stuff like Screw Attacks or Game Trailers is how they seem to think that RPGs didn’t exist before Final Fantay. We had them on PC waaaay before they were ever on console. We even had RPG/adventure type games like the Quest for Glory titles.
Earth, Wind, Fire (and water.) Awesome.
It took me 10 years! to beat this game! Final Fantasy 8 forever owned me. I got this game when I was 15 and I just now beat it. Now that is dedication lol’s! Nothing funnier than picking up where you left off in Highschool LOL
Destroy FFVIII…It diserves to be destroied…boring boring game..even the last boss isnt hard –’
If you can…destroy FFX-2…please? kill that bastard of a game
First I know of an RPG that does the attacking darkness bullshit like final fantasy and it is called Digimon World 2 on the Playstation. Second why is it called FINAL fantasy if there are like 13 sequels.
Never expected the Doctor Who theme tune to be at the end.
Haha loved the review. and the sarcasm XD
“because I’m sure the anti-FFVII brigade would have taken some time out of their busy schedule jacking off to Kefka and throwing darts at pictures of Sephiroth cursing ‘Final Fantasy VII is fucking overrated’ over and over ”
Heh, yeah that about sums them up
I was about 3 when I first started playing this game (yeah. I was sad enough to learn to read JUST to play this game…. ) but back then there wasn’t really much of anything else TO do asides play either this game, the retarded beach sports game or Super Mario brother’s… Really wasn’t anything to do when the rest of the hick place ya grew up at had nothing fun to do. So I grew up doing anything I could out of boredom FOR this.
But since you wanted to go to the lengths to say this about the game FF1… White mage was actually one of the easier selections to beat the game with. White mage had good stats once you figured out you could ‘use’ items such as the thor hammer to use lightning2 and 2x ruse spell made it so that they couldn’t hit you in a fight AT ALL and you could endlessly ‘use’ the thor on the solo challenge. Nobody else really had that much of an easy time with it, except red mage from the beginning until the red mage’s stats slowly became inferior to any of the other classes which made the armor and ‘use’ effects negated.
You want to know what was hard? Beating the game on a THIEF
there will be blood (the poster on your wall) is a piece of shit film
Brilliant show man. Although I am an FF8 fan, but I do like your review… probably the coolest thing is when you get too angry about the game. You really made my day. Can’t wait for next video…
have a wonderful day, and thanks a million.
Spoony , dude , check this out: http://img264.imageshack.us/img264/7849/gunbladeincs16.jpg
I hope you get to read this and actually check the link , it’s a FUCKING GUNBLADE IN COUNTER STRIKE !
Hey, I just got a thought. What if we were to run into Foamy the squirrel from Neurotically Yours in the game at some part
P.S. I played the game but only got so far past the second disk
Keep ‘em commin’ man! The FFVIII is your best review so far!! :)
I wrote something about my impression of older rpgs and Final Fantasy, recently,on a blog I started, if anyone is interested:
http://shiruva.wordpress.com/2009/05/04/rpgs-and-final-fantasy-13/
i saw it shiruva and i think its great. if you post something else i want to know
I actually hope this isn’t the end…
I just read the post on shiruva and I just had to tell you guys to play FF12 whit ATB on, whit the awsome gambits system this game really give you the feeling of action rpg combats in a really strategic way!! And all of you shall go on the ps online store to download the cinematic for FF13 in HD :P so GREAT!! Assuming you got your ps3 -_-
BTW:sorry trying my best to whrite in english. Criss Dans l’fond chu Quebecois après toutes!!
Do you know what you should do next? The Romance scene… IN SPACE!!! LOL! and not to mention the giant spaceship
I feel sorry for Spoony. No matter how much he hates it, and no matter what else he tries to distract us with; SWAT 4, The Ultimate Battle, etc, the fans just seem to want to see more FF8!
It must be a nightmare for him… the thing he hates most has become the heart and soul of his website!
Oh man, PLEASE cut short the Dr. Insano and other sketch characters. Please?
And I’m saying this as a huge fan of your stuff. You’re at your best when you’re rightfully tearing apart this worthless weeabo emo anime pile of crap. Don’t go the Angry Video Game Nerd route and have it become more about “wacky” skits than tearing into bad games.
ok well i agree with you totally dude.
i fucking hate these story lines too, there ridiculous and stupid but for some reason i like to play it.
that and i thought i throw this out there, these god damn rpg’s never know when enough is enough with the fighting!
but i was wondering if you were gonna do a review on final fantasy 10
cuz if you think this story line is damn right stupid play that fucking game.
but anyways peace out, and your hilarious.
Feels like I’ve found a goldmine! But why have thou stopethed!? WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!?
Well at least this explains how you are Dr Insano in those crossovers w/ linkara.
Very good review, and Dr Insano is the greatest thing since sliced bread!
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