How do you deal with customers returning defective Nintendos? This simple video will show you how!
Thank you! If only I had this, with your hilarious commentary, when i started in retail; I wouldn’t hate humanity quite as much. Well maybe not, I still worked in food service first. Still, you made my day Spoony!
Haha, good one Spoony one
Great video, Spoony. It’s eightiestastic!
Am I the only one who noticed the Dirty Harry videogame in the background ?
Anyway, great Riff. Not as funny as the Game Daily one (lack of Zelda Scott and all) but still pretty funny.
Man, Gary Cole’s career was off to a really slow start.
I think some stores had a World of Nintendo device which you could hook anything up to it and see what the problem was.
(Sigh) I miss my Nintendo!
Anyway, what kind of person would dirty up a poor NES console? That thing is like, treasure to our generation!
OMG the nerd is John Billingsly aka Dr Phlox from Star Trek Enterprise!
Sorry, but this riff isn’t as funny as the first one. The source-material is actually competent for one thing, and there’s no Zelda (THANK YOU LORD!).
hahah lol @ “oh, she must be playing Heavy Rain”
It really says something about the quality of product when even the customer support need customer support.
haha, So true
Awwww… I was expecting someone more offensive and just plain wrong than Zelda.
Oh well, at least we’ll always have that Sitcom Dad behind the counter to make fun of.
What I want to know is how they managed to turn the machine on and immediately get to a castle level in SMB3.
I fear you’ve already reached the pinnacle of employee training videos with Furious Zelda, this one is pretty pedestrian in comparison. There’s only so much you can riff on lacking material. . .
He’s Nintendo tech support, he has epic skillz.
Awesome. Please do more riffs on employee training videos, Spoony.
I had worse moments in retail, for example calculators got a sticker on the display that shows how the numbers would look like if the calculator is turned on and people think its broke because “it shows always the same numbers ..”
Has anyone else notice the music in this sound a lot like the Wii Store music? Weird…
That aside, this has to be the best info-videos I have ever seen. No joke.
Do you suppose mistakenly plugging the controller into port 2 was a common enough problem they had to highlight it?Also, that first NES has a story tell. A story wrought with many horrors.
The customer is mostly certainly always wrong. 4 years in service taught me that and now Spoony only reaffirmed that.
Oh this made me giggle…
You should really do more of these Noah. :3
Having worked in video game retail for years, I can definately sympathize with dealing with the occasional annoying customer. Questions like “Is this a game?”, “Will this game (Super Mario Brothers 3) work on Genesis?”, “Do you rent ‘Intendo Tapes’ here?”, “Do you sell lamps?” and grandmothers asking me what game I would recommend for their TWO year old grandson. (Your steak knifes, Ma’am.)
not quite the same as gamecrazy. let’s face it there is only 1 Zelda Scott. . . I hope.
Where the hell do you find these videos? At least the actors in this clip don’t insult our intelligence as much as Zelda Scott.
I can’t believe I’m saying this, but this video needs more Zelda….. :D
Lol, I’m thinking for another t-shit: “I gotta mad fever, Dog, and the only prescription is… MO’ ZELDA!!”
This shirt of yours… It needs to be made like right now :D
We don’t sell these to anyone you know :P
I swear the nerd is a young John Billingsley, and after all the roles I’ve seen him in (from numerous nerdy characters to dark, perverted ones) this would have to be the creepiest if it really is him LOL :)
Not as funny as the GameCrazy one, but that’s more because of the material used than your hilarious riffing (‘She must have been playing Heavy Rain!’ made me LMAO). This is a lot more instructive and to the point – two things GameCrazy absolutely lacked LOL And, of course, this doesn’t have Zelda………………….I’m still not sure whether that’s a good or bad thing :)
That HAD to have been John Billingsley. But MAN… going from this to Star Trek: Enterprise… who would have known his career would have gone in the toilet so quick?
A horrible 2 1/2 years at Mc Donalds taught me the customer really IS always right…and usually a dumb@$$ too.Originally I tried going with my former philosophy, which was: “The customer is always right…unless they are wrong, in which case I will immediately inform them of their wrongness.” Sadly that was not a big hit with my managers :-(
Okay, this video shouldn’t have been about helping the customers with their problems, but instead it should have been about how to help folks like Guy #1 from breeding and raising demon hellspawn who think their Nintendo should play in the mud and bathe in coke and should have an adhesive coating all around it so that whoever touches the accursed item will be forever tainted with its taint. Seriously, send in the National Guard to that guy’s house!He’s in serious need of help! The twitchy behavior. The nervous look. The frantic speech. This man is being held hostage by his kids! My gawd, won’t anyone save this poor man from his hellish torment?
Round house kick the kids and his employers?
On second thought, forget what I suggested earlier. I really should learn to think before I post anything.
It was not inappropriate. Maybe a little random but there was nothing wrong with it. I think we all knew you were joking. If you feel uncomfortable about how someone may interpret it, just put a smile at the end of it to indicate you are joking.
Well, that’s good to hear. ‘Cause I do have this uncanny habit of getting into trouble with my jokes. For this I blame my weird sense of humor which no one seems to understand. Heck, sometimes I don’t even understand it myself :D Anyways, from now on, I will take your advice and use them smiley faces when posting comments here. Thanks, man. :D
Holy crap! Was that Grant Goodeve?
Geez, I had no idea playing Nintendo was so difficult.
I miss Zelda… But this was stil fun tho’. ^^
I’ve worked in electronics retail, selling these game systems and dealing with returns. These are the majority of all people with returns. And yes, some people are as absolutely clueless as the mother. At the very least, when it’s not busy, you can show them what’s wrong, wave them goodbye, then have a nice laugh about these people.
and btw, THE PIE IS A LIE!
Where do you keep finding these fucking things man?!
The cake is the lie. The pie is the truth. I will make that a meme, I WILL DO IT ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!
Is the guy with the Game Boy Dr. Phlox??
Yes I believe it is.
I couldn’t place it until I saw your comment. It does look like a much younger Dr. Phlox. I think you’re right!
Hilarious stuff. Although unlike the gamecrazy one this seems reasonable and inoffensive…then again I wasn’t a part of the Nintendo generation…
Jesus christ, do they show these to every employee? I don’t think it tops Zelda though. Man that guy musta gone out of his way to make his NES that dirty! That’s fricken gross. Usually with a nintendo, it was clean the games, sometimes using a air compressor mind you, and when all else fails hit the machine till it works. It always does!
At least I wasn’t the only one to notice the double stock of that one game at the back left there…
Lol yeah because everyone whos worked on a customer service job knows that customers are really this understanding about stuff like that. Theyll totally buy a cleaning kit from you with no argument whatsoever when the thing doesnt work
Always dread returns! They ask 1000 questions and make you feel stupid, “Well, you have to turn the power on and don’t store the console in the toilet!” Jeez, it doesn’t work, just help me out!
I’m suddenly remembering why I hated working in customer service. It’s unbelievable what people will try to return. I had someone try to return a used greeting card once.
That should be in Ripley’s believe it or not!
I can think of the Title!
Return to Sender!
A customer once tried to return a used greeting card once! The customer was an idiot!
You gotta be kidding? What was the excuse?
That they ended up not going to the person’s birthday party.
It was only like a two dollar card. If they’d at least had a receipt and not been an arrogant jerk about it I might have actually let them return it, but the guy was actually surprised that I wouldn’t let him return it.
Wow seeing all those rows of NES and Game Boy games brought back some memories..not all good though..I’m one of the few youths that had to suffer through ‘Super Pitfall’ *shudders*
I don’t know where you find this but its pretty awesome. Maybe not better than Game Crazy Zelda but awesome. Oh, and the guy whom he sold the cleaning kit to, that was 11 different flavors for baloney. That problem was caused by a faulty pin in the console which Nintendo wouldn’t admit to until years later. I had so much frustration cleaning games and systems in my youth, it no doubt took years off my life. They ripped me off because they wouldn’t admit their mistake. Blowing in cartridges and screaming at my Nintendo turned me into a bitter and jaded person. Seeing this video flat out lie to store clerks only increases my rage.
Great video, Spoony! I was surprised there wasn’t a joke about that copy of the Dirty Harry NES game on the right over the Ghostbusters game.
G-dawg that was hella jammin.
OMG its Dr Floxx!!! wow he started small…
BTW those returns are nothing…ever see someone return Mario 1 for two separate games??? I have…bunch of bs
That was fantastic. I’ve seen so many people try and return so much crap obviously either caused on purpose or in a frenzied panic to rip off companies. Now try and return an Atari joystick game. How can you get those wrong?
I left a cup of root beer next to my PS1 and it ate through the cup and went up into the Playstation without leaving a trace. Now Spyro has uncontrollable seizures and the pause screen pops up every two steps. *sigh* Those were the days…
“Our business is entertainment.” So grab a beer and a pistol, shoot at the whiny customers feet and make them dance. It’s all going to be okay!
I would stop drinking root bear if I saw that. I would think it would burn a hole in my throat.
This was probably done during the time that the iron curtain of Gamestop was still in it’s infancy and Nintendos were being sold at big retailers like Sears and JC Penny. The sad thing is that I bet some retailers like Wal-Mart are as ill-advised over game returns as these boneheads were back then!
And I LOLed at the Heavy Rain joke and the stupid mother who didn’t know that you have to put an NES controller in slot 1. Who’s dumb enough to think that putting a controller in slot 2 will make the game work? It’s not the Psycho Mantis fight in Metal Gear Solid!
Another great riff video! I almost laughed my ass off when the lady didn’t know that you need to plug in the controller to the #1 slot. I know this was made in the early days of gaming, but the Atari 2600 had a second controller slot, so at least most people should’ve known that sometimes you had to switch the controller to the other slot in order for anything to happen.
that mom was hilarious. cmon lady i’ve been plugging in nintendos since i was five! lol. i kept waiting for Crazy Game Zelda to come in and teach that mother a lesson with her mad skillz.
one can only wonder what a xbox 360 training video looks like “Just give in and exchange a new one. Have no spine at all!”
Absolutely hilarious! I love these riffs of yours, Spoony, and I look forward to more! Er… Take that as a hint if you’d like.
A PIE? What?! Why would she even say that?
God, she was so hopelessly mom-like.
Where do you find all this stuff? Hilarious as hell.
something is wrong with comment counter maybe Lady Scarlet should take a look at that
Wow, talk about eerie. Dirty Harry for NES is right above Ghost Busters!
Also, great job Spoony. The riff theaters have been getting steadily better and better. I’d definitely have to say this has been the best so far because there wasn’t as much ridiculous stuff to work with as Captain Zero and GameCrazy
What the heck happened to that nintendo? Did the Boomer from left 4 dead puke on it? E PRON!
It’s the lost Schlumper brother! :D
I still think it’s the EPROM
I wonder where all the games in the back are right now… I wish I had some of them right now, specially in that condition =P
I love the TSE Riff Theater, keep it up!
Cant wait to see another episode of Captain Z-Ro.
I’ve actually written games for the original GameBoy (and GameBoy Advance) and I still don’t know what the hell the guy saying “EPROM” is going on about.EPROMEEEEPROMEPROM!!Hahahahahaha
Sure, this video is lame, but at least it doesn’t treat the intended viewer like a fucking moron. The GameCrazy video was such an insulting, patronizing, piece of corporate horse-shit. I hope Zelda Scott was murdered in a drive by gang-initiation.
I’ve seen this one on youtube a couple years ago but it is still really funny. I love the first customer “that’s not soda pop” and obviously the Nerd….EPROM, gotta be the EPROM.
Good job on the commentary.
The funniest thing about this video is that they had to trash an NES
Where does he get these?
is that grant goodeve narrating this?
I love the music.
Criminy, what’s with the soft focus? Was this some weirdo’s idea of a romantic flashback? Like that one salesguy was remembering with delicate fondness the first day he met the narrator in the days of his innocence?
EEPROM! Hmm sounds like a new internet meme to me!!
*EEPROM Go home!
*IM A FIRIN MAH EEPROM! BWAAAH!
*What IS EEPROM…baby don’t hurt me…
*THIS IS EEPROM!!! *BOOT*
Excellent, but where/how did you get this and the Game Crazy video? If you can keep getting these things so you can make fun of them that would be awesome.
I know I feel safer with my gaming products having the Nintendo Seal of Approval stamped on it. Hell, the Virtual Boy had it so it must be a quality product right?!
Oh, no. Oh, God, no.
This is going to be amazing.
We’ve seen the Nintoaster…but now we need a Nintoilet!!!!
better ask James!
you know without a racialy insensitive uppity white girl this just have the same impact. is it wrong for me to be constantly asking “but what would zelda do?”
0:10-I guess that like how blonds can have brown or black eyebrows. just go with it.0:21- “Why should you deal with this problem?” because nobody else will.0:54- looks like somebody left it outside and buried it. “geez, why does this hoes, not go in to this small slot?”1:12- It even sticks to his hand!1:29- “Clean? Whats that?”2:30- Nerds are always up to no good. You can’t trust them.2:45- Lol. unintended sexism3:23- What does a controller port have to do with the picture?4:06- try 45% range in most surveys. Maybe even worse.5:56- he better write that number and directions down as he will not remember it latter7:12- so put back old components in new cases to give to the customer?! “Why didn’t I get the gun?”8:06- fun at customer service? isn’t that wasting a companies time?Not a bad video but not as funny as the gamecrazy one. Nice commentary spoony.
This was okay, but it doesn’t even come close to beating the GameCrazy video for sheer, hilarious, what-the-fuckery.
Ack. Sorry about the double-post.
I’m surprised he didn’t point out Dirty Harry. Since he knows how much that games deserves the Nintendo seal of Quality.
G-dawg that was hella jammin’
Awesome Spoony. Just fantastic.
Why do 80′s videos always have this crazy Bloom like effect? It’s like the 80′s was Fable.
But yeah if that lady had offered me “Pie” I would be like woah sure meet me out back later after you drop the kid off lol.
Silly John Billingsley, why did you have the contrast so low?
I’m surprise the Nerd can’t figure that out by himself I can figure that out when I was 5!
Heavy Rain the game where nothing Happens!
I have a question Spoony what happened when they start selling the POWER GLOVE “I love the Power Glove! It’s So Bad!”
LOL Omg that gave me some great laughs. nice one!
Now THIS is classic Spoony! Good to see you riffing much more again.
excellent as always spoony :)
I found this on wikipedia :D
An EPROM, or erasable programmable read only memory, is a type of memory chip that retains its data when its power supply is switched off. In other words, it is non-volatile. It is an array of floating-gate transistors individually programmed by an electronic device that supplies higher voltages than those normally used in digital circuits.
Congratulations! You now know how they “program” calculators and VCR clocks, along with game cartridges, electronic fuel injection circuits, and ten jillion other dedicated IC devices. Use this knowledge wisely, or the labcoated men from the IEEE will come for you.
funny as always spoony!
a few great jokes, but overall not very funny. spoony was spot-on but there was very little to work with.
I do so miss the NES days
Check out a young John Billingsley (Dr. Phlox from Enterprise, Mike Spencer from True Blood, and the eccentric creepy guy from EVERYTHING ELSE) at about 2 minutes in.
I had to pause it because of the Heavy Rain joke
Amelia Bedelia returns her Nintendo (seriously, who thanks someone with a pie?)
Sigh. Without a white bread soccer mom spouting ebonic hand-me-downs, video game CSR training videos just lose the magic.
That was awesome, but why do all the employees and the narrator seem hostile?
Heavy Rain is amazing Spoony and you know it. For someone who liked playing hours of Ripper and Phantasmagoria, it is right up your alley.
Needs moar Zelda.
yep the stereotypical nerd not knowing anything about technology and gaming XD
It might just be because it's an old video, but it really seems like they were pretty heavy on the soft focus here. Makes it almost look like a Barbara Walters special.
I wonder if tech support still works. I got a controller that's experiencing some problems. hehe
Oh my God, the nerd is John Billingsley!
That was the style of the time, probably because the second-generation video cameras made normal lighting look overlit and “video cheesy.”
I love the light jazz background Musak. Because when I think of Nintendo in the '90s, I recall all those suburban doctors' offices where I first played Mario Bros. and Ironsword.
BTW: You need to make a “Nintendo Mechanic” t-shirt YESTERDAY. Or I will. And I don't have access to all the great, expensive design software people have sent you, so it will look like crap. And no one wants that. Most of all, me.
Also: Anyone who thinks of a joke about the Wii's wireless controls being “next-gen” when they see the box for the Nintendo Satellite gets 1,000,000 points.
Uber winnage!! I'm a cashier so I know these things!
Oh wow. Who the fuck puts the controller in port 2? Retard.
“Nintendo Mechanic”, with a picture of a NES with the controller plugged into port 2.
Was that Grant Goodeve as the first guy addressing the audience?If it was, I would have to insert an obligatory 'Spy sapping my NES!' reference here. ;p
OMG! It is Dr. Phlox as the Eeprom! :D
Wow. That girl is really stupid to put a controller in port two.. I know it's scripted but christ… Who would be THAT dumb?
Fun stuff but nothing special, but that's the training videos fault there's not a lot to work with.Seriously the contrast?Eh maybe its the blur effect, but the only games I could recognize where Ghostbusters, Dirty Harry and Final Fantasy.
Wow, It's Dr. Flox from Enterprise!? I see other people have beaten me to the punch in recognising that though. Wow he's really young here.
“Look it's your fault. It's your fault, okay? Just go away – I'm busy!“
That almost killed me ……. xD
“Nintendo Mechanic”, with a picture of the Nintendo Mechanic PLUGGING THE CONTROLLER INTO PORT 2.
wow, Disthron and Spoony, the two sides of Phantasmagoria!
“Hi, I'm not Gary Cole, but an incredible simulation!”
And how the hell did the help guy get to the castle cutscene so fast from just turning the game system on?
He is that fucking good. How do you think he got that job?
OH Riff the Fox News Mass Effect 'se'xbox report next!
News Anchor: *about Mass Effect* Leaves nothing to the imagination!Spoony: Yeah! Except for What does a nude Tali'Zorah looks like, We didn't even get that in the Sequel!
I try to do that if they do something major, but “lololol port 1″ isn't really pie worthy.
I want an NES :(
ROFL loved that video, my parents got the NES before I was even born, but it's still working fine (Although like you said I have to blow into the cartridge sometimes, but I clean the system so it's not much of a problem) love your comments on the video.
This started giving me flashbacks to when I used to work in electronics and got the stupidest questions involving various items, granted, nothing like the overly browned NES but some pretty damn close on the stupid-fuckometer.
yeah, if they do some serious repairs I could see a pie as gratitude
Why treat the customer this way? … Cause fuck'em! That's why!
Wow. Looking at all of those boxes on the wall, like Final Fantasy (I) and Metroid, certainly sparks a lot of nostalgia for me……… God, I feel so ****ing old.
I know your pain! I'll share a tidbit with you if you share some with me! I love these kinds of stories!
This one time when I was working, someone asked me if World of Warcraft was on Xbox 360. I told him “No, it's only on PC”. So he gets all indignant on me and looks at me like I ruined Christmas for him. “I saw it for 360 at another place, you just lost a customer!” He yells, so I just shrugged and let him get ripped off ^_^
Clearly you never worked Retail in the video game section…I swear there was a sign at the door of my store that said “Drop off brain here”
that nerdy guy with the gameboy is the chef from star trek voyager.
I recognize that song that was playing during the “cleaning kit” scene. It was on a tape that my grandma bought in the 1980s called “Positive thoughts for children”, which supposedly had subliminal messages on it.
2:03 is that…Dr. Phlox?
You are correct, that is John Billingsley.
“Don’t you hate returns? Well, Ninetendo’s doing something about it”… yes, folks, we are now going to KILL your customers for you. That way, you will never have to worry about returns again. You, see, it is very simple. You sell them the product, they take it home, and as soon as it is used the product will immediately detonate the C4 inside the casing, blowing both the customer and the console, up. And, thanks to our new Franchise Development section, there will be no evidence left at the crime scene to tie either you or the company to the deaths, ensuring happy, no-returns fun for all. And, good news, if someone survives, they might even come back for another console to replace the one that blew up. Yes, folks, this is how you ensure a good sale. Thankyou for enjoying our video. And remember, always smile, because your face will probably be one of the last your customers will ever see.
omg that nerd was neelix from star trek voyager!!!
sorry!!! i will look at the other comments before stating the obvious next time.
Keep it up spoony! your doing a grate job.
So he’s like a cheese grater?
heavy rain had lots of action :(
Yes it did, none of it was any good though.
Only a few were defective? Why, then, do I remember having to blow on the game cartridges to make them work? Oh, and the old “tap on the machine” method during which I would actually tap the console (AND IT WORKED!).
Looking at that back wall of games really brings back memories (seeing a shrink wrapped copy of Final Fantasy, awesome). And I never once had trouble with my NES games unless they were rentals or I was playing someone else’s system, it’s called taking care of your stuff.
What the fuck happened to that NES at the beginning? Lord!
Hello? Customer service? I’ve been having trouble shoving my Wii cord into the game port. I tried repeatedly jamming it in while holding the power button but only white stuff came out of my TV. I’m now officially tired and my console is completely worn out. What am I supposed to do?… mhm?… mhm?… I need to call the Nintendo Hotline? O.k., thank you.
Seriously though, that video was freakin’ hilarious.
(re: Mario’s brown hair and black mustache)
My hair is brown but my facial hair comes in bright red. It just happens, I suppose.
Another infamous game that got the seal of quality? SUPERMAN for the Nintendo 64.
lies!! all lies!! i am not a good hardworking person!!
I wonder if I could get my money back on my Wii.
It’s not broken or anything, it’s just a shit console.
that geek guy returning the gameboy is docter plox of start trek enterprise!! ROFL
Why does this training video even exist? Shouldn’t the Nintendo Tech Support video simply tell people to blow in the console and it should be fixed? Still love that bits with the man trying to return the dirty NES and the one with the woman who couldn’t figure out how to put the controller in the right slot.
I’ve seen this a dozen times and I never noticed… the host/narrator is Kevin Bacon. (Yes I know it’s not, but I reject your reality and substitute my own, dammit!)
The music for the ‘nerd’ is so hilarious and weird. It’s basically an archetype inducing tune going ‘here comes a nerd…..here comes a nerd, hey ho diddle dee dee, here comes a nerd’.
In fact all the music in this is like that…..each person has their own THEME TUNE!
“Mario’s mustache is black, but his hair is brown. I don’t get that?”
Holy shit, I never noticed that before. Now I can’t unsee it!
What’s really funny about this video to me personally is that, aside from one incident of my Game Genie becoming lodged in the machine (did that ever happen to anyone else??), I don’t recall ever having to get my NES serviced. And even though an NES has no moving components and a far lower margin for error, you’d think that between two rowdy brothers using it it’d find SOME way to end up looking that first one in the video covered in soda… but wouldn’t you know it, the damn thing sure has been a trooper and still works beautifully today and so do all our games. This from a 22-year-old 8-bit NES that endured two careless, rambunctious little boys’ childhoods..
Now that we’re adults, we both focus greatly on taking good care of our expensive toys – yet my brother is now on his 4th 360, a modern, advanced gaming machine. It’s like clockwork – the stupid thing permanently craps out somehow after 5 or 6 months – within warranty – and he sends it back and gets a brand new replacement courtesy of MS. The warranty has never had the CHANCE to expire!
I know full well of course that modern systems have moving components, operating systems and a decent margin for error considering all that’s expected of it… but still… just compare here
NES – 22 YEARS and still working great.
Xbox 360- 5 months average, maybe 6 if the moon is full and Saturn is aligned with Neptune.
DOS computers still work. It’s all so basic. I don’t have a 360 anyhmore ether