The Spoony Experiment - Because bad movies and games deserve to be hurt back!

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_ICDHG7TLTN6JVK6JMK3TKQFXKQ Mike Wallace

Wasn’t Napoleon an ally during the American War for Independence?

*Shakes head* The concept might appeal to douchebags and fans of “Manswers,” but I can think of better ways to settle petty tavern/playground debates/dick-waving contests about who could beat up who in a fight. That’s the problem with these pseudo-science shows; you get a camera with a slow-motion function and suddenly you’re spending all your money hiring “experts” to hack at pig carcasses all day. Why can’t they do the sensible, intelligent, entertaining thing and bitch about TV shows on the internet?

I kid. In all seriousness the show is good for the occasional awesome moment, even if it’s wildly inaccurate. But the best parts of the show are the kinds of things people do for free on the internet already, just go on YouTube and look up weapons and guns. I saw one guy demonstrate dragonfire shotgun shells on a plastic dummy and it was ten times more awesome than anything Spike TV has out right now.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_HHYFDN44YXT3H6LDT2YCO34HCY Brian

No, France was, but Napoleon was still a child during the American Revolution. France at that stage was still ruled by Louis XVI, and were supporting the American rebels mainly to try and break the British supremacy on the seas and in North America.
- http://pulse.yahoo.com/_ICDHG7TLTN6JVK6JMK3TKQFXKQ Mike Wallace
  
  Well I read that Napoleon called for ten days of mourning in France after Washington died.
  - http://twitter.com/JJJMMM1 JM
    
    Yes, he held George Washington in high regard, but he had nothing to do with the American revolutionary war.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Anthony-Cekic/1142040841 Anthony Cekic

you know it would be nice if deadliest warrior actually took a sort of mythbusters style. I mean say what you want, but at least on that show they try to enact true science with some emperical data and not just psuedo-science with slo-mo cameras.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=661037953 James Enri

Meathead does suck.

That’s a freaking GODLY T-shirt, spoony.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_6QB3W3ACVOJETR5FLA6IBE3XZA faster

Haven’t even seen this yet, but just want to say so glad to see more vlogs like this again! I could listen to you talk about anything :)

http://twitter.com/TheWeirdOtaku 【Drakardus Mitsukai】

Took you way too long to think of Vampires vs. Werewolves. XD

Tom

I have to say, as much as I hate their methodology, I still watch and enjoy the show to an extent. They know science, but they aren’t interested in that. That does not matter, so long as the show itself is entertaining and not completely wildly inaccurate. It is inaccurate, but not ENTIRELY so. I’d say it is 70-85% inaccurate. (Which for spike is pretty damn impressive).

Also, the Russians don’t fight, they let their COUNTRY do the fighting for them. What I mean? They let the weather destroy the troops. It is how Napoleon lost and it is how Hitler lost.

My problems with the show are very much the same as yours. It isn’t scientific, they can’t possibly quantify what they want to quantify (at least without confusing all of the people watching it). History is kinda meh…. They need to get their facts straight.

My BIGGEST BEEF ever is in Ninja vs whoever it was. BULLSHIT! Ninja DID NOT OPERATE that way. Hell the modern concept of ninja DID NOT EXIST until the mid to late 20th century. They also did not have swords! THEY WERE PEASANTS THEY COULD NOT AFFORD THAT! THEY USED FARM TOOLS THAT WERE MODIFIED FOR BATTLE! Minirant over….

So yeah… I don’t watch it for history, I watch it to see the final battle. And it is entertaining to the point where it is so ridiculous. And if that is the direction it is taking it will become FAR MORE ENTERTAINING!

Anonymous

I bring up the sad, sad, truth about Ninjas every time someone gets a boner for them and brings up some stupid, uneducated Ninjas vs. Whatever argument.

It’s all fantasy and exaggeration for the purpose of entertainment. It’s all fiction. Even Pirates are greatly exaggerated for entertainment, but at least their exaggeration is based somewhat on reality where “popular” ninjas were basically just made up.

People never even stop and think “if a Ninja is supposed to be stealthy and sneaky, why the HELL would they wear an outfit and carry weaponry that would immediately identify them as a ninja?”. That’s like James Bond running around with a shirt with “SPY!” written in big, red letters.

All this especially went through my mind when Spoony first started going after Deadliest Warrior. They might as well have Dinosaurs Vs. Dragons if they’re going to treat fantasy-ninjas as a historically accurate figure.

http://twitter.com/chero666 Hector Perez

I’d honestly would like to see a Malcolm Reynolds (Firefly) vs. Han Solo (Star Wars).

http://www.facebook.com/people/Georg-Veramme/719603017 Georg Veramme

Oh hell yeah, this.

http://twitter.com/nightcobra Leandro Ribeiro

being portuguese i remember laughing when i learned that napoleon tried to take us over 3 times and in all 3 times his forces were defeated and sent back.
interesting thing is, that our forces at the time were similar to washington’s in the way that we didn’t have that many people and supplies, but we did have terrain advantage.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_HHYFDN44YXT3H6LDT2YCO34HCY Brian

When you say, “our forces” you’re meaning “Wellington’s Redcoats”, right? Because the Portuguese didn’t have the ability to stand up to Napoleon at the time, the disparity in forces would be like sending out a squad of quadraplegics to take on the Navy SEALs in a war-game exercise, and took virtually no part in the actual defence (much as they wanted to).

The Spanish had a strongly effective guerilla rebellion going on, but even that would have collapsed without serious monatery, equipment and eventually soldier support from Great Britain.

http://twitter.com/the_real_TRR Taylor Reitz

wow I was bitching about this episode while watching it and playing TF2. And now I get to hear my words made funny. awesomesauce.

Anonymous

yay, more Spoony bitching… Vlog… YAY ^__^
Keep em coming ^__^

Anonymous

This show reminds me of why it’s important that stupid people shouldn’t play with guns and other dangerous objects.

They’re not toys. And this show seems to be a bunch of children blowin’ shit up because it’s fun…well, okay, maybe it is, but if I were blasting things away with a damn Rocket Launcher or something, I’m not going to pretend it’s some kind of “Scientifically Accurate” study or comparison or even a display of the weapon’s proper functionality.

It’s just me, pretending to be a plastic army man toy, blowin’ shit up. I’m sure I’d have fun if I were the goober firing the weapon, but if I’m just sitting at home watching this on TV…my brain is going to hurt. Bad. Because I’d just be watching a bunch of other goobers have fun. If it were a genuinely educational or at least a properly informative show, then I could watch it for it’s informational value, but it’s not that kind of show. The “Meltdown” episode of Red Dwarf has more historical credibility than this.

It’s big children playing with dangerous toys. And they’re pretending to be intelligent and scientific about it. I wish I could turn my own brain off so I could enjoy something like that, but that’s what my B-Movies are for. To Hell with this show, I’ll just watch Army of Darkness. The shotguns fire as narrowly and accurately as rifles, and chainsaws can’t possibly be used as a weapon that effectively, but it’s not pretending to be “accurate”, it’s just trying to be fun, and it IS! And it doesn’t insult my intelligence. I can just shut up and enjoy something like that because it’s not trying to take itself seriously.

This is also why I don’t watch TV much these days. Too much is made by idiots, for idiots (but then again, that’s Spike for ya). And there’s no more Penn & Teller: Bullshit. I never thought it would happen, but it has; I’m running out of reasons to have Cable.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jakob-Heugenhauser/100001231405910 Jakob Heugenhauser

“This is scientifically brutal.” There should be a T-shirt with that ^^

http://www.facebook.com/bob.bible Bob Bible

That’d be awesome! Let Noah make the shirt.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jakob-Heugenhauser/100001231405910 Jakob Heugenhauser

“This is scientifically brutal.” There should be a T-shirt with that ^^

http://www.facebook.com/people/Anthony-M-Mickelson/1130919614 Anthony M. Mickelson

Lets see if spike games responds to this lol

http://www.facebook.com/people/Anthony-M-Mickelson/1130919614 Anthony M. Mickelson

Lets see if spike games responds to this lol

Anonymous

According to Wikipedia, not only will there be a Zombies vs Vampires (Season finale), but the Zombie team is led by Max Brooks (World War Z), and the Vampires have the author of 30 Days of Night.

http://twitter.com/FinnishPhenom Mikko Laurinen

So the zombies are looked at from the most down to earth approach to them I’ve seen while the vampires are the rapid ones who seem constantly on cocaine? It’s looking even WORSE for the rotten guys shambling about. lol

http://www.facebook.com/people/Adam-Doran/100000584164074 Adam Doran

yeah washington vs napoleon well it made my head hurt

http://www.facebook.com/people/Erik-Bartsch/664786171 Erik Bartsch

3.1 Episode 23: George Washington vs. Napoleon Bonaparte3.2 Episode 24: Joan of Arc vs. William the Conqueror3.3 Episode 25: U.S. Army Rangers vs. North Korean Special Operation Force3.4 Episode 26: Genghis Khan vs. Hannibal3.5 Episode 27: Saddam Hussein vs. Pol Pot3.6 Episode 28: Lawrence of Arabia vs. Theodore Roosevelt3.7 Episode 29: Ivan the Terrible vs. Hernán Cortés3.8 Episode 30: Crazy Horse vs. Pancho Villa3.9 Episode 31: French Foreign Legion vs. Gurkha3.10 Episode 32: Vampires vs. Zombies

Anonymous

My personal theory on why they changed software is because Civilization V came out.

http://twitter.com/TheNikus Omnikus Schlotter

“Washington was like: ‘WTF? Get those guys!’” ^^

Anonymous

I freely admit that The Deadliest Warrior is one of the dumbest shows on TV. But I enjoy it because of that. I just turn my brain off, watch shit get blown up and shot and listen to Faramir narrate. But yeah, they’re about as scientific as Dr. Insano. In fact that might not be a bad idea….Reb Brown vs. The Clones of Bruce Lee. Who. Is. Deadliest?

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_QFYSCA32EI53EW5UJGU7XQ675I Daniel

It’s Spike tv, that alone is a dead give away that they won’t use logic. It’s why I won’t watch this show, but it’s fun to listen to Spoony bitch about it.

Anonymous

Was the battle you were thinking of Austerlitz? That’s usually considered his magnum opus.

Anonymous

It could also have been Waterloo, I literally know very little about Napoleon except that he is tied to the battle of Waterloo.
- Anonymous
  
  Faking out the Russians means we’re talking about Austerlitz. Napoleon deliberately abandoned a commanding position on a hill and then left his right flank apparently vulnerable so that the Russians would attack there, leaving Tsar Alexander’s position on the hill open to attacks by the French left. I’m paraphrasing here, but Napoleon said that the Russians moved as though he were directing them on the drill ground.
  
  Waterloo was Napoleon’s last battle, a brutal slugging match against the Duke of Wellington that was essentially a bloody stalemate until Britain’s Prussian allies showed up, and basically ended Napoleon’s “100 Days” of rulership after his return from Elbe. After that, he was exiled to St. Helena in the middle of the Atlantic, and there was no coming back from that.
- http://twitter.com/FinnishPhenom Mikko Laurinen
  
  He’s tied to it because he LOST IT. lol That’s where the saying that something is someone’s Waterloo comes from, that the incredible Napoleon got his ass handed to him there.
- http://twitter.com/FinnishPhenom Mikko Laurinen
  
  He’s tied to it because he LOST IT. lol That’s where the saying that something is someone’s Waterloo comes from, that the incredible Napoleon got his ass handed to him there.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jakob-Heugenhauser/100001231405910 Jakob Heugenhauser

Vampires vs. Reb Brown

kevin cullen

alright just putting it out there, the Headless Horseman VS Jack Skellington pretty good match up right

Tiler Bradshaw

Vampires vs. Klingons.

Just a thought.

http://www.facebook.com/NewDefect Dru Pearce

NO SPOONY, I want Vampires Vs Shaolin Monks!

Anonymous

Let me test something….

“X factors”
Washington had 319 pointsNapoleon had 316 points

319+316 = 635 total points(319/635)*100 = 50.2%(316/635)*100 = 49.7%

Battles
Washington won 50.6% (2530)
Napoleon won 49.4% (2470)

Yeah, I thought so. They seem to almost completely disregard the weaponry, favoring these new X-factors instead. Maybe this new software is a basic, four-function calculator.

http://www.facebook.com/NewDefect Dru Pearce

Actually, Zombies V Mummies.

http://www.facebook.com/NewDefect Dru Pearce

Actually, Zombies V Mummies.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Lenne-Shuyin/100002432893015 Lenne Shuyin

more spoony more spoons, yayaya… now what are ya talkin about?

http://www.facebook.com/people/William-Park/1065800526 William Park

ok i dont want to comet too much on this episode as it really anoys me but one point I will raise is have you noticed the Americans always win ?

also if you want to see the whole top down battle explained thing done WAY better check out the series Line of Fire form a fue years back.

Another great series is Mike Loades Weapons that made Britain. it covers bow, shield, sword , spear/lance and armour and they show how these weapons where used, demonstrate how easily these weapons can be taught to raw recruits and actually test the weapons and armour using scientific means. also they go into the construction methods and tactics the used and also give insight into battles where these weapons played a crucial role. best of all the whole series is on youtube i think.

a fun one if you can find it is a show called Time Commanders, basicly its a team of 4 people who command one side in a historical battle in Total War while two historical experts look on and point out how they are failing.

Anonymous

I hate to gun for somebody like this but actually your wrong, the Russian Spetsnaz beat the American Green Berrets.

Also, another show that’s almost identical to the way spoon described the way he would d it is called Battle Field Britain. It actually had some pretty excellent visuals in it’s own right.
- http://www.facebook.com/people/William-Park/1065800526 William Park
  
  good point but then again there Spetsnaz … I mean you can only bend reality soo far!

http://www.facebook.com/people/Cory-Williams/100000927554729 Cory Williams

i was waiting for you to say vampires vs werewolves, the moment you said vampires vs zombies I thought “NO THAT’S JUST WRONG! IT SHOULD BE VAMPIRES VS WEREWOLVES!”

and I’m sure you’re not aware of it but you can’t dislocate your shoulder with an m16, it has no kick. in fact if anyone injures their shoulder with an m16 at all they’re probably holding it backwards

Anonymous

I have to say when I heard about the new season of DW I was really hoping to hear you go off about it again. Oh and for Deadliest Character how does this idea fly:
Batman vs John Conner!

Joe Schmoe

They should just call the show: “Super Smash Bros. Teir Show”

http://www.facebook.com/octopodesrex Jacob Elias Land

I like the concept of a load of motherfuckers as a measurement of soldiers. If you get into the millions, are they megafuckers? Gigafuckers? I’ve known quite a few megafuckers in my time.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Ryan-Kaufman/1811270839 Ryan Kaufman

The popping is definitely the mic’s sensitivity. I can tell by how loud you are compared to other videos in this particular video. (And the fact that only certain letters that are in the beginning’s of words set it off)

Spoony should make VLogs about all that makes up our modern world. We just have to invent another 12 hours for him to utilize.

Anonymous

It’s Emperor of French not France ^^

Anonymous

You really have to stop watching this…

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_ZLSYFJYO6LQWVKOLAMDM3QHIRQ Daniel

What was that ridiculous bullshit about Russia? Is that what they teach you about world history in USA?
“And now class, a history of eeeevil Russians. Yes, fear and hate them, we wrote all out history books during Cold War”.
Read a normal book. And read about Kutuzov.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Yasin-Bacour/100001293978981 Yasin Bacour

When Napoleon took Moscow. The Russians set fire to it.

The Russians burned their fucking Capital to the ground rather than let Napoleon sleep a single night in it. (note I do not know 100% sure whether it Moscow was the capital, I actually think it was Sint Petersburg.)

Not only that. They had even broken open the Prisons and let loose every single criminal in the Moscow Dungeons to further inconvenience the French.

Yeah imagine that. After a massive march through ice cold snow you finally reach Moscow. Fight one of the bloodiest battles in the entire war for that city. Than when you can finally lay your head down you do so in fear of a murderer slitting your throat until you wake up and see half the city engulfed in flames.

The Russians pretty much live by the moto: “If I can’t have it, it’s best if neither of us have it”
- Anonymous
  
  But that is the exact sort of thing that would be found in an american history book about Russia, inaccurate and slanted to make the Russians seem primitive and cruel especially concerning their own people. Kutuzov did not order Moscow burned and tsar Alexander was so upset afterwards that he vowed never to make peace with the French until Napoleon abdicated. The French historians blamed the Russians, Russians blamed the French but it was Tolstoy that was correct. Moscow was an abandoned wooden city which was left by all administrative authority to the lowest class of Russian serfs and was without a fire department it burnt so easy because no one could stop it and was started perhaps by the smallest of incidences not by nations and peoples. Also the fire grew to the scale after the Grand Armee had spent a day there. In any case that definition of Russian life seems pulled directly out of Cold War era propaganda and while I should know better than to comment on generalizations on peoples and history on the internet, it seemed like the response to Daniel’s remark about the American general publics misinformation on Russia was met with misinformation on a crucial point in Russian history, which bothered me somewhat.
  - http://twitter.com/JJJMMM1 JM
    
    Stating that Tolstoy was correct is more of an opinion than a fact, since it’s not clear what exactly happened. Reportedly Russian arsonists were caught and they were under the orders of Moscow’s chief of police. Apparently their orders were to burn down some specific buildings – not to torch the whole city. These are mentioned in Napoleon’s letters to Alexander and (if I recall correctly) in his memoirs, altough these are obviously subject to bias.
    
    Russians did, however, excercise scorched earth tactics throughout their retreat, burning fields and poisoning wells that they left behind. It’s not propaganda, it’s what they did and it worked very well as a part of Kutusov’s strategy.
    
    I don’t recall Spoony claiming that Russians were evil. He said the Russians were “crazy” and drew comparisons to the battle of Stalingrad, saying that if you want to conquer Russia, you have to crawl over corpses, or something like that. That was a compliment. He meant that Russians fought to the death. This was the case with Russian linesmen in 1812, most of whom were serfs who were generally used to rough living and the climate.
    
    However, Russian officers were not very competent from what I’ve read (not talking about the high command here) and they didn’t seem to know how to take care of their troops. This is one thing Tolstoy got wrong in War and Peace.
    - Anonymous
      
      Fair enough with my point that Tolstoy was 100% correct. I worded sentence poorly but even the Russians or the French didn’t mean to set the entire city alight.
      
      As for Spoony, I’m not really trying to argue with what he said. Scorched earth was a clear and devastating tactic for the Russians to use especially since the french retreated on the exact same road to Smolensk. I realize that the high command ordered fields and property burned along the retreat but the fallacy that the Tsar, his court, High command, and the people left behind in Moscow wanted the entire city of Moscow directly burned to the ground before the Grand Armee entered the city was what I was specifically addressing.
      
      What I was replying to specifically was Yasin Bacour’s comment which I noted myself was foolhardy and ultimately pointless.
      
      P.S. Yes most of the officers were incompetent many of them where among the lower nobility or merchant classes who had no previous military training or experience like the high command or the older officers had. And while certainly not a larger theme of the novel Tolstoy does address this to some extent (Denisov looting the army’s own supply without orders only after failing to observe his own men’s actions and fatigue for some time and pretty much the fact that Dolokov and Prince Anatol even became officers despite being the worst sort of scoundrels.) Opinion again with Tolstoy but one of the complaints from Bennigsen was that the newer officers were poorly trained in almost every way imaginable and unfit for combat.

Simi Leun

Vampires vs. Klingons obviously

Anonymous

And since everyone else is doing it, I might as well be one of the cool kids too:

Vampires Vs. Lovecraftian abominations. I figure the Innsmouth Folk would be a good start, and if you really want a grand finale, top it off with Dracula Vs. Dagon.

Though I highly doubt the Deadliest Warrior people are the reading types, and since there aren’t any major blockbuster movies involving Deep Ones and such, I very much doubt they’ll know anything about these things. Fuggin’ zombies, how basic and cliche can you get?

And since I’m going into geek-mode already, an episode of the goofy Ghostbusters cartoon had a rather amusing bit with Vampires vs. Werewolves. They kept biting each other, so both sides turned into werevampwolf-things. Bit of a funny stalemate, actually, heh.

Anonymous

And since everyone else is doing it, I might as well be one of the cool kids too:

Vampires Vs. Lovecraftian abominations. I figure the Innsmouth Folk would be a good start, and if you really want a grand finale, top it off with Dracula Vs. Dagon.

Though I highly doubt the Deadliest Warrior people are the reading types, and since there aren’t any major blockbuster movies involving Deep Ones and such, I very much doubt they’ll know anything about these things. Fuggin’ zombies, how basic and cliche can you get?

And since I’m going into geek-mode already, an episode of the goofy Ghostbusters cartoon had a rather amusing bit with Vampires vs. Werewolves. They kept biting each other, so both sides turned into werevampwolf-things. Bit of a funny stalemate, actually, heh.

Anonymous

Angry Joe Vs. Linkara

Who is deadliest?

http://www.facebook.com/people/Seth-Williams/15618827 Seth Williams

Do you think that’s Meathead’s O-face?

Anonymous

Vampires Vs. Werewolves! And use stock footage from Twilight. If nothing else, it’ll make some heads explode.

Anonymous

Vampires Vs. Werewolves! And use stock footage from Twilight. If nothing else, it’ll make some heads explode.

Anonymous

Regarding the Captain America movie you probably just finished. Imagine it as a Call of Duty game. The first time there’s an easy target for a cheap hollywood game put out before the movie that I want to play, and it doesn’t exist? Seriously, this could reinvent the term cover based shooting.

Anonymous

Regarding the Captain America movie you probably just finished. Imagine it as a Call of Duty game. The first time there’s an easy target for a cheap hollywood game put out before the movie that I want to play, and it doesn’t exist? Seriously, this could reinvent the term cover based shooting.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jason-Prentice/100002333576013 Jason Prentice

Joan of Arc vs William the Conqueror eh?

*Opens Age of Empires 2*

Joan won, cavalry bonus vs Footman.

Anonymous

If Civ 5 has taught me anything, it’s that Ghandi could beat the shit out of Nebuchadnezzar II.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jason-Prentice/100002333576013 Jason Prentice

Joan of Arc vs William the Conqueror eh?

*Opens Age of Empires 2*

Joan won, cavalry bonus vs Footman.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Dylan-Malanchuk/100000655702339 Dylan Malanchuk

Im not saying it made the show perfect, but It did alleviate 2 of my major complaints.

1: It did do more side-by-side testing with simmilar weapons. No more biased points with different tests.

2: It gave points based on the strategy and person themselves to the sim.

Still not perfect but I might be able to turn my brain on some more this season.

Martin Lah

Vampires vs. Zombies will be the last episode of the season. And it should be against werewolves!

Martin Lah

Vampires vs. Zombies will be the last episode of the season. And it should be against werewolves!

Anonymous

Haha, I see you’ve watched Tokyo Gore Police. I still remember the night a friend brought that to my house.

Anonymous

Vampires versus Ghostbusters.

Anonymous

I remember an episode of The Real Ghostbusters that had vampires and werewolves in it.
- Anonymous
  
  The best part of that episode was when they left the two to fight and they showed off what happens when a werewolf bites a vampire or a vampire bites a werewolf.

http://profiles.google.com/danvgeg Daniel vigil

Wish I was there to bitch with you Spoony! Keep doing what your doing!

http://twitter.com/marcusnoble Marcus Noble

You want logic is something from Spike TV? Keep in mind this is the same network that airs Impact Wrestling. Logic jumped out the window there a long time ago.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Michael-Wells/519519675 Michael Wells

Not to be a supporter of this. But if you ever watched their After the Show.. Show.. they admit the Edge to each weapon is just the host’s opinion and has nothing to do with the simulation it gives no bonus and even note sometimes their edge opinion is wrong.

Anonymous

I think The Deadliest Warrior’s problem is that it’s too obsessed with realism. Why focus on stuff like Revolutionary war soldiers or the French Imperial Army?

Spike needs to sell the show to SyFy. Then, they can do things like Redcoats Vs. Vampires. Colombian Warloards Vs. Predator Rip-Offs. Khmer Rouge Vs. Insect-Men.

And they would get the bonus of kickass shitty SyFy Original Movie premises while doing it!

http://www.facebook.com/people/Michael-Wells/519519675 Michael Wells

Since I am a a huge history fan I would love to see the show moved to History where they would make damn sure this show was scientific
- Anonymous
  
  Yeah, they can shot it between Swamp People and Ancient Aliens.
- Anonymous
  
  Yeah, they can shot it between Swamp People and Ancient Aliens.
  - http://www.facebook.com/people/Michael-Wells/519519675 Michael Wells
    
    Funny, And is there a problem with those shows if they have followers? I was being serious as it would give the show more resources and a few new restrictions on using the scientific method as loosely as they are.
    - http://pulse.yahoo.com/_HHYFDN44YXT3H6LDT2YCO34HCY Brian
      
      Yes there is a huge problem with those shows as they are basically a pack of lies sold to you by snake-oil salesmen. And History has a repotuation as being an educational and factual series. This means that people who don’t either have the resources or the wherewithal to check the “facts” presented are looking at this show and saying that “there must be some truth in this” Alien building the pyramids crap. Fine if the channel was specifically saying that these programmes were for entertainment only and not to be taken as to be even remotely true. But the fact is the channel purports the stuff to be true, and even distorts the arguements presented so that the few times you see someone on the shows rubbishing the tripe presented it is they who are presented as the blinkered know-nothings out to suppress the truth, and not the other way around as it actually is.
- http://www.facebook.com/people/Christopher-Alden/100000469737019 Christopher Alden
  
  Yeah, sure History Channel would make them be scientifically accurate. Just like all their shows about aliens, the Illuminati, and Atlantis are scientifically accurate.
  
  Fuck, man, History should go back to showing WWII docs all day. At least those had some connection with reality.
http://www.facebook.com/people/Michael-Wells/519519675 Michael Wells

Since I am a a huge history fan I would love to see the show moved to History where they would make damn sure this show was scientific

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jd-Clark/1348072804 Jd Clark

Death Battle by Screwattack is actually exactly what you like in Deadliest warrior, cause they ACTUALLY do what you want. THey look over everything form skills, power, what they do, how they think, feel And their Endurance and things of the sort. the only show they kinda made fun of, was Justin Beiber and Rebecca Black fight each other and *Spoiler* They Kill themselves, the Jonas Brothers, some random Kid, and Miley Cyrus. Everything else, They actually take everything into account.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jd-Clark/1348072804 Jd Clark

Death Battle by Screwattack is actually exactly what you like in Deadliest warrior, cause they ACTUALLY do what you want. THey look over everything form skills, power, what they do, how they think, feel And their Endurance and things of the sort. the only show they kinda made fun of, was Justin Beiber and Rebecca Black fight each other and *Spoiler* They Kill themselves, the Jonas Brothers, some random Kid, and Miley Cyrus. Everything else, They actually take everything into account.

http://twitter.com/Ryanoftherocks Ryan McGrath

You know history :D Please marry me now.

Srsly, make one of these for every episode, I’m not even kidding

Anonymous

I’d love to see a Really Racist Deadliest Warrior.

“Today, on the Deadliest Warrior. The Yellow Wind, silent warriors from the East, we have… ASIANS! Versus the scourge of the Dark Continent, possessing an inhuman speed and coordination, we have… BLACK PEOPLE!”

“After a surprise comeback from the Asians when they put down their nunchucks and started driving, black people lost when they couldn’t outrun terribly driven cars. NEXT WEEK, on THE DEADLIEST WARRIOR: Greasy crime lords of the Mediterranean versus the cutthroat bankers and baby eaters of Eastern Europe, it’s… ITALIANS, versus JEWS!”

Anonymous

I actually wouldn’t be surprised.
http://UnholyFireDragon.com Unholy Fire Dragon

Well, going by the stereotype, I’d say it might go like this:

Asians would have all the materials to make whatever they want and everything they’ll ever need. They’d also have lots of martial arts skills to go with their weapons, armor and general artillery.

The blacks however, would be easily striped of their nature-oriented homes, treated as slaves and then left for dead (poverty, starvation, etc.). This would be done by the Asians in this case.

Asians win! LOL
WTF…

Anonymous

This video is too long. I think Noah rocks, but i’ll say it again, one LOOOOONG take is sometimes draining for us — and clearly for you, Noah. I don’t know the answer though. My humble suggestion is a list of points written in your lap to stay on topic within 30 minutes or make some cuts and edits. The problem with the “cuts and edits” though is that people would notice and probably get cranky about it, thinking you are abandoning your conversational style for a more “youtubey” editing style, which wouldn’t be true. If your edits were fueled by actual “reason” — unlike those youtube people doing it to be “hip” — it would be fine though.

I think you won’t to this, however, for two reasons. One: the vlog topics themselves aren’t always worth the time it takes to edit, and TWO: you have enough to do and don’t want to waste your time editing when you can just throw it up on-line after you maybe watch it through once.

It’s a blend of very understandable laziness while simultaneously being overworked.

Long live the Spoon, but i cannot believe that after Deadliest Warrior has stolen at least two previous videos from us and hours and hours from Spoony, he’s going to continue watching it and post and hour long video. uh…….. ?

http://www.facebook.com/people/Ryan-Jones/503193818 Ryan Jones

I don’t mind long videos, I just let it play in the background while I’m doing stuff. I also like the 3 hour long podcasts on giantbomb.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Christopher-Alden/100000469737019 Christopher Alden

You think this episode is bad, they’ve announced they’re going to do vampires vs. zombies this season. I think Spoony should sue for royalties, since they’re obviously stealing the concept of Deadliest Character.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Christopher-Alden/100000469737019 Christopher Alden

And of course, he mentions it at the end.

Anonymous

Yeah, that was kinda BS. If we’re just having Napoleon and Washington duke it out, it’s no contest. Washington was kind of a badass- considered the finest horseman in the Americas, and famously strong. If we’re talking Grand Armee versus the Colonial Army? They’re very different animals.

The Grand Armee is better trained, disciplined, and equipped. It also benefited from advances in military doctrine. For instance, as a result of experiences gleaned from fighting in the New World (French and Indian War, in particular), many European armies created Light Infantry units, which fought in loose skirmish formations.

Also, comparing weapons (besides cannon) at this time is kind of pointless. Everyone was using similar smoothbore muskets, and slight differences in accuracy were mostly meaningless when thousands of men were firing volleys at less than 100 yards. And even then, the decisive infantry weapon was still the bayonet- the fire was to weaken and demoralize, so that a bayonet charge would break them.

As for generalship- No disrespect to Washington, but the two aren’t even in the same league. At least before soft living and Russia diminished his generalship, Napoleon was truly brilliant. Washington was competent, but his real brilliance lay in his ability to keep the Colonial army in the field, despite poor equipment, discipline, and no pay. Like Spoony said, Washington won mostly by staying alive.

As a final complaint, what about cavalry? Used properly, cavalry was a decisive force on the battlefield, capable of running over any unprepared infantry. To ignore it would be like talking about a World War II army without discussing tanks. Inexcusable.

So that;s my history lesson/rant for the day. And now you know.

wrwt2

You beat me to it.
wrwt2

You beat me to it.

Anonymous

According to Wikipedia, Vampires vs. Zombies is the last show match up for Season 3. And yes, how come it took Spoony so long to come up with Vampires vs. Werewolves? It’s the classic Fangs vs. Claws motif. Or, if you want, maybe Vampires vs. Mummies. Gotta go old school ’50s creature features. Oh, Vampires vs. Things from the Black Lagoon!

I still hope Spoony does more Deadliest Character videos. But instead of doing it in animation, do it with cosplayers at a convention. Or during the TGWTG 4 Year Anniversary. Get the 501st to play Storm Troopers for Spoony. Or maybe the Chicago Ghostbusters. Spoony did say they wanted to do something with him. Zombies vs. Ghostbusters would be awesome.

But yes, I hope we get to hear more Deadliest Warrior bitching soon.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Michael-Wells/519519675 Michael Wells

I just figured it was so obvious he was leaving it out for something new..
http://www.facebook.com/people/Charles-Mckenzie/100000034459966 Charles Mckenzie

actually the creature from the black lagoon’s actuall name is “gillman”

Though, come to think of it, vampire’s VS. john carpenter’s The Thing would be kinda awsome…
- Anonymous
  
  Well, we’ve already seen Spoony vs. The Thing & The Army of Fuseboxes though. Spoony may have one that fight, but I think his sanity may have been a casualty.
  
  http://spoonyexperiment.com/2007/02/25/the-thing-review/
- Anonymous
  
  Well, we’ve already seen Spoony vs. The Thing & The Army of Fuseboxes though. Spoony may have one that fight, but I think his sanity may have been a casualty.
  
  http://spoonyexperiment.com/2007/02/25/the-thing-review/

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=594209058 Michael Couacaud

I thought you hired an editor last year to help you out. Great rant anyway and funny that you forgot scorched earth and Vampires vs Werewolfs

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jg-te-Molder/100001503808332 J.g. te Molder

Vampires vs. Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table. Vampires vs. Werewolves has been done to death.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Georg-Veramme/719603017 Georg Veramme

Not really, Merlin can just use one of his spells to summon the sun up and bam, game over Vampires.
Now Vampires and Drow….
- http://pulse.yahoo.com/_AW3VX7HGVPJFFLYOQGRTPWDVFQ Joseph
  
  Ah, but you forget that vampires can seduce people rather easily and turn them into their own kind; so, if they didn’t try to use these techniques on Merlin they could do them to Morgan La Faye or a whole team of wizards so that they had people on their side cast some form of “eternal night” spell that would counteract against the “sun” spell.

Anonymous

Eat the Pig! Eat the Pig! Ziggy Ziggy Ziggy Zig!

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jg-te-Molder/100001503808332 J.g. te Molder

William the Conquerer vs. Joan of Arc?

What’s the point of that? William the Conquerer was a battle hardened, heavily trained general.

Joan of Arc was a mascot, with a short time of extremely rudimentary sword training. She was there to inspire the troops, and that’s it. The first time she made an actual military decision was to ride amongst her troops to better inspire them and it got her an arrow for her trouble. The second time she listened to the voices in her head over the generals and the king, and rode with but a handful of religious fanatics onto Paris, result: burned at the stake. And oh, yeah; she hears voices in her head.

http://www.facebook.com/xMaeRx Ryan Beckmann

Vampires versus The Jackson Five?

http://UnholyFireDragon.com Unholy Fire Dragon

Something that sucks vs something that doesn’t suck? Interesting…

http://UnholyFireDragon.com Unholy Fire Dragon

When I watched that show a while ago, I’d get so annoyed and bored of all the filler they put in there that I just recorded the shows and then skipped to the last 10-15 minutes of them (or more accurately, I skipped to the part after the last commercial break). It actually enhanced my experience of the show, since EVERY FUCKING THING they mentioned through the show was summarized and showed again, and then they finally had an entertaining battle scene.

I think, considering the channel that this stuff is on, the show is for the kind of men that like to act “manly”, but ignorant, idiotic, stupid, etc. If this was on The Discovery Network however, the show would probably become about as intelligent as The Mythbusters’ episodes. It would probably be as awesome as nerds talking about what cartoon superheroes would win in a fight and there would be a variety of scenes “proving” their point.

By the way Spoony, I agree with you about the point/number system being pulled out of their ass. I generally hate when people create an arbitrary/subjective rating system and then uses it for calculations. It’s like… “I think the average score of these weapons is a 5, and the average for those ones is a 10. Hey, will look at that! That means this army is twice as powerful as the other!” :-P

http://www.facebook.com/people/Michael-Wells/519519675 Michael Wells

This was my comment as well, to move the show to a channel where they do care about the facts of these simulations not just a random ‘manly’ show of weapons.
http://www.facebook.com/people/Michael-Wells/519519675 Michael Wells

This was my comment as well, to move the show to a channel where they do care about the facts of these simulations not just a random ‘manly’ show of weapons.

Anonymous

Never took this show seriously; I mean its basically just a Ninja vs Pirates sorta show; something you see 2 guys talking about at a bar. Who would win between X and X? probably the first guy to mortally strikes the other shmuck. When I first saw this title, I honestly thought it was George Washington’s army vs Napoleon’s army. That would have been much more interesting and plausible to watch. But just the 2 guys dueling? ><! Play Shogun 2 or any war simulation game instead!
ps-Ninjas FTW! -Dream

http://www.facebook.com/Mr.JackClaw Eric Lamoureux

Vampires VS The Justice League (Or any group of super heroes)

http://www.facebook.com/people/Michael-Wells/519519675 Michael Wells

I think Marvel did Dracula vs The X-Men so maybe that is done.
- Anonymous
  
  Yeah. It was in both the regular comic and it was followed up in an X-Men Annual.
- Anonymous
  
  Yeah. It was in both the regular comic and it was followed up in an X-Men Annual.
http://www.facebook.com/people/Michael-Wells/519519675 Michael Wells

I think Marvel did Dracula vs The X-Men so maybe that is done.

http://www.facebook.com/Mr.JackClaw Eric Lamoureux

Vampires VS The Justice League (Or any group of super heroes)

http://www.facebook.com/andrzej.postl Ondřej Postl

It doesn’t surprise me that the show has not improved very much.

Oh and by the way, weight and height doesn’t matter in a swordfight. That is why I fight with long swords. In a fistfight, usually the guy that is bigger wins, simply because he has more force behind his punches. There are some variables to that, I know.

However, technique is pretty much the only thing that matters in a sword fight. You need to train to be good, and you need to get actual fighting experience to get better, whilst if you are a big guy, you can just walk up to a guy and punch him in the face and bam, here you go.

It is an opinion of a junior swordsman, and it may have its flaws, but I stand by it.

http://twitter.com/FinnishPhenom Mikko Laurinen

I wouldn’t disagree, but would you agree that between two swordsmen of equal skill the one with the greater reach has an advantage?
- http://www.facebook.com/andrzej.postl Ondřej Postl
  
  That depends on the situation.
  
  If we remove all the random stuff that might happen, and go with this perfect situation, than the one with the greater reach should have a little advantage. He does not have to move as much, and he can relax for a bit, since his oponent is the one that has to get closer.
  
  If you take this perfect situation, than yes, he may have a better position.

http://twitter.com/thancrus thancrus

Care Bears vs Ewoks
Terminators vs Cybermen
Dynosaucers vs Cybermen
Transformers vs Gobots
Tonka Dump Truck vs a nuke

http://www.facebook.com/Mr.JackClaw Eric Lamoureux

Tonka Dump Truck VS The Dump Truck in BoB The Builder
Mario (From Mario Bros. obviously)VS Bob The Builder
The Noid VS SpongeBob Squarepants

http://twitter.com/strife17 Eric Rivera

Vampires vs. Jedi

Andrea Montano

Very interesting– I heard the whole vlog and there some good points about history XD- I wished my History teacher while I was younger was as interesting and yes, Americans don’t pay too much attention in History or Geography, even though the American Immigration Services pushes you to memorize all the facts about American Culture and know it well before Naturalization. How ironic!! Good luck at ConBravo!

Anonymous

me: werewolves. vampires versus werewolves. vampires versus WEREWOLVES!!
spoony: oh wait, vampires versus werewloves.
me: finally!

Aleksander Adamkiewicz

you know what that new better software is called?

Mount and Blade: With Fire And Sword

i can totally see that

Il Principe

And while we’re at it: Robocop vs. the Terminator!

Il Principe

And while we’re at it: Robocop vs. the Terminator!

http://www.facebook.com/people/Justin-Cordes/100000456604223 Justin Cordes

Spoony, I’m amused watching you ramble about anything. Just listening to you talk about something that really ticks you off motivates me to go speak my mind on something that irks me. And that drive is amazing! And part 2 of X-2 was just as hilarious as the first, just keep doing what you do man. Because your videos have such high entertainment value to me, and tons of other people.

http://twitter.com/MindOST MindOST

Macho Man Randy Savage vs. Kevin Sorbo’s Hercules.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_KQZM4I3JX6F27LT4EM2Y27IFMU Corey

oh I want in on this how about chuck norris vs kain of final fantasy 4 who is deadliest.

http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

Why does Noah give so much attention to things he hates?

http://www.facebook.com/people/Maija-Karoliina-Salenius/100001060110359 Maija Karoliina Salenius

Russians are scary. I admit that. But you have to remember that finns beat them… in prolonged combat… ;3

http://twitter.com/FinnishPhenom Mikko Laurinen

Well, to be fair it WAS a defensive victory, not like we made a beeline for Moscow or Leningrad. :P
- Anonymous
  
  You didn’t want to. the Russians left so you were happy with that.
  
  Simo Hayha for the WIN!
http://twitter.com/FinnishPhenom Mikko Laurinen

Well, to be fair it WAS a defensive victory, not like we made a beeline for Moscow or Leningrad. :P

Anonymous

Anyone wanna play a game where you get to shoot muskets at people, lead suicidal bayonet charges, or bust out your officers saber and cut people down?

Check out the battle grounds 2 half life 2 mod!

http://www.bgmod.com/

It even has linebattle servers where people do the lineup and volley thing.

jasenjava

It seems you had some trouble coming up with someone to pit against the vampires at the end there. Meh, Werewolves, ok…but you, Spoony? I immediately thought vampires versus Highlander immortals! How bad ass a fight would THAT be?!

http://www.facebook.com/people/Luc-Bélanger/100000567236259 Luc Bélanger

Vampires vs. Shaolin monks? That’s pretty much already happened:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legend_of_the_Seven_Golden_Vampires

In which Peter Cushing as Van Helsing goes to a rural Chinese village with 7 kung-fu warriors to fight Chinese vampires controlled by Dracula.

http://twitter.com/Vanvidum Vanvidum Strype

Spoony, you might like the “alternate history” genre. You sounded a lot like the history hobbyists (and experts) at the AlternateHistory.com board–If anything, they’d be more brutal than you in eviscerating the show. Realistic behavior, even for an alternate timeline writing, is something to be taken moderately seriously.

Anonymous

Scott Pilgrim vs. Edward
Harry Potter vs. Percy Jackson
Power Rangers vs. Fantastic Five
Star Wars Stormtroopers vs. Terminators

Anonymous

Terminators? Really? I think one of them would be enough.

You just wanna see storm troopers die, huh?

“oh, but they fought jedi—” one fuckin time. Regular guns beat them.
Anonymous

Terminators? Really? I think one of them would be enough.

You just wanna see storm troopers die, huh?

“oh, but they fought jedi—” one fuckin time. Regular guns beat them.

http://twitter.com/cb04092 Mike Clayton-Brown

i like your rants spoony, always interesting ^^

Anonymous

Storm Troopers vs. Cavemen? … No match if you have Yor on the Cavemen side, he’s the man!

Anonymous

Yor being present means MAD for both sides leaving only Yor left. The man is a walking Black Hole!

Anonymous

Storm Troopers vs. Cavemen? … No match if you have Yor on the Cavemen side, he’s the man!

http://twitter.com/FleacyTheSheep Desiree X

Totally off topic but have you played the Fallout New Vegas DLC Old World Blues? It’s basically a game made for Dr.Insane-O. They have a recurring theme of SCIENCE!(yes they shout it like that), robots, and all together camp. I kept thinking of Dr.Insane-O the whole time.

UC Grab

Vampires vs the Thing from outer space

http://www.facebook.com/people/Stunt-Chan/1814606380 Stunt Chan

I agree completely! I hate this show so much but I love to watch it anyways. LOL This all could be answered with a simple answer ITS SPIKE!. Its a “jock, man show” There doesn’t have to be any real science or expertise as long as shit gets fucked up, like everything else on Spike. I do like the fact they got Richard “Mack” Machowicz Future Weapon.

About the ranged weapons…
Forgive me if i cant remeber what episode. But they had the ballista, ONE BALLISTA. They were shooting the bolts at the targets one at a time. They responded, Well its not so accurate, and it takes forever to load. So edge goes to the other guy. What ever. They used more than one. Same thing with the Chinese rockets. Well they spray all over, they’re not accurate. First off they had specialists building them at the time, not just taping arrows on fireworks. Second there was also a volley. At the time that would scare the living shit out of enemies as well as affect morel.

As for the fake pointless doctors…
Mythbusters did Pirate myths, specifically from from Pirates of the Caribbean. They set up dead pigs dressed like pirates, loaded the cannons, with cannon balls, grape shot, nails, chains, and like from the movie, silverware. lol and that shit was awesome. they didn’t need a Specialist doctor to come out and say.”Well this would have killed him.”

I swear, a lot of these reality TV shows either have the same group of writers or they graduated from the same class. You can almost predict was going to happen and what will be said. first of all they drag it out for way too long. They have the cheesy reenactments with cheesy effects as the episode is being explained. They cut to commercial, come back reiterating on what they’re doing for 5 min, every time after commercial. They could easily cut that out and add more weapon tests or add more accurate testing, (i.e. volley fire with more units) and add more historical interesting facts. Again this is a “jock, man show” and i don’t think they want history lessons.

Anyways… I’ll probably keep watching LOL.

http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

And may I remind you that the ballista was compared to a FUCKING WAR AXE!

Yeah, because an axe is totally comparable to a tree trunk launcher.
- http://www.facebook.com/people/Stunt-Chan/1814606380 Stunt Chan
  
  *grumbles* yes i remember. It makes as much sense as Knight Vs Pirate. Ended the way i thought. Bullet in the face, for the knight.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_AW3VX7HGVPJFFLYOQGRTPWDVFQ Joseph

Good to know that with the show’s minor changes it’s still as accurate as a college student’s pie chart “proving” that the death penalty = chaos in society.

As for Dr. Dorian: if you want to see him do more than point at a pig carcass and say, “This guy’s dead!”, I believe the Discovery Channel is still showing “Medical Mysteries of the E.R.”, in which he is one of the doctors that talk about their most bizarre cases of sicknesses that their patients had come in with.

Vampires vs. the Greek Gods: think of the levels of epic awesomeness this could bring!

Anonymous

Nappy vs. Washington? Sounds like something for the Alien Spacebats board on alternatehistory.com

Invading Russia is a crazy venture. Karl XII of Sweden, Napoleon Bonaparte, Adolf Hitler all tried and failed, due to the crazy size of Russia, the scorched earth tactic of the Russian military and the harsh terrain.

Borgs vs. Daleks? Daleks would win. They have fucking reality bombs and time travel.

http://twitter.com/GalaxianEXE MV

Vampires vs. Knights of the Round Table lol

Anonymous

King Author vs. Count Dracula!!!!
- Anonymous
  
  Run Away!
- Anonymous
  
  Run Away!
- Anonymous
  
  Naw Arthur vs Achilles. I take the whole “heels” thing of the legeand as a literal blind spot, saying he was abtle to overcome and attacker in melee weaponry; pretty much being the perfect master of the all but one technology of the time: the bow. I see the story as a warning to older generation about the new…how innovation can beat you, no matter how serperior you are in what you do, even a novice can kill a man with knife if he has a gun.

http://twitter.com/Jigglysaint Tom Williams

I had this vision in my head of having Dr Insano going on about all the “science” and stuff for Deadliest Characters, but in a twist the ending simulation would just be him taking two figurines of the characters and just mashing them together like with what little kids usually do when playing with action figures. Also I thought Spoony’s hesitation to match up vampires and werewolves was a joke considering how much the two sides are known to hate each other.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Sean-Lincoln/503842752 Sean Lincoln

Goddammit, THAT’S NOT WHAT CANNONS ARE FOR! FUCK.

Tiler Bradshaw

What if it was Vampires vs. (Left 4 Dead) Zombies? I think that’s actually turn out to be interesting. Seeing a handful of Vampires trying to toe-to-toe with Hunters, Spitters, Chargers, Tanks, Witches, and the like.

Tiler Bradshaw

What if it was Vampires vs. (Left 4 Dead) Zombies? I think that’s actually turn out to be interesting. Seeing a handful of Vampires trying to toe-to-toe with Hunters, Spitters, Chargers, Tanks, Witches, and the like.

Anonymous

But did they blow up a large appliance? You can’t gather proper scientific data without doing that.

Anonymous

Daleks vs Borg isn’t really a contest, the Daleks would utterly crush them. No a better match up would be Borg vs Cybermen, they are way more evenly matched. Plus the Borg are a MASSIVE rip-off of the Cybermen (who have been around since the 1960′s) so that should mean a pretty fair fight.

Anonymous

Daleks vs Borg isn’t really a contest, the Daleks would utterly crush them. No a better match up would be Borg vs Cybermen, they are way more evenly matched. Plus the Borg are a MASSIVE rip-off of the Cybermen (who have been around since the 1960′s) so that should mean a pretty fair fight.

http://twitter.com/SanJ922 Sanjay Dharawat

Another thing they fail to mention is that Napoleon pioneered a technique called “flying artillery” allowing him to redeploy the heavier iron cannons more rapidly.
They also completely cheat and give Washington two guns to Napoleons one.

http://twitter.com/SanJ922 Sanjay Dharawat

Another thing they fail to mention is that Napoleon pioneered a technique called “flying artillery” allowing him to redeploy the heavier iron cannons more rapidly.
They also completely cheat and give Washington two guns to Napoleons one.

Anonymous

The wheels of the Deadliest Character show may be movin slow, Quinlan, but they’re movin!!

Anonymous

As an historian, I can say with utmost certainty that you don’t need to be an historian to tell how absurd the premise for Deadliest Warrior is. Something like this contest especially is like comparing apples to oranges, and the more you know about each, the more cringe-worthy the ‘science’ behind these tests becomes. The only way you could conceivably get some kind of objective conclusions is to create an entire alternate history, and in that case the details of the alternate history would have to largely be invented. This could be a very interesting exercise, but the amount of detail it would require would take a very long time to plan out (something akin to ‘total history’), require the input from a number of different experts, and wouldn’t have a final conclusion since more details and theories would constantly be added with new information and insight. With enough time and work, you might be able to determine under certain circumstances if a certain force of a certain size on a certain terrain under certain conditions might be able to claim victory, but how do you factor in supply lines, political pressures, lack or resources, or temperament of the generals in question? You can’t unless you invent them, and in the end all you can do is guess and debate. Given that this show is apparently just about watching ‘cool fights’, I doubt there is anyone watching it who seriously considers it to be objective…at least I hope not.

I do hope you do another Deadliest Character show, as arguing about non-existent characters with made up technology strikes me as a lot more fun than the migraines I would likely get watching this show.

Anonymous

Do they even bring into considerations Washington’s Rifle-armed Skirmishers? There was the use of Buck and Ball shot as well in the muskets and the fact that whenever muskets are used it would always in squads of 100 at a time and using drill and etc to increase the firing rate, something that the French would be better at, to make them more effective.

It would have been nice to have seen their reaction to the chains and scrap metal that the Americans used in their cannons and the mess they’d have made.

http://furlugedepot.com/ Furluge

To answer your first question yes they do take into account Washington’s rifle armed skirmishers. Noah briefly mentioned it. The rifle was the reason they gave the “edge” to Washington’s troops.
- Anonymous
  
  Did they even mention the fact the rifles couldn’t mount bayonets?
  - http://twitter.com/FinnishPhenom Mikko Laurinen
    
    They never mentioned bayonets at all, actually.
    - Anonymous
      
      That just makes it worse. That was a standard piece of Kit on both sides. I kind of laugh at the idea of Napoleon starting a fight with an American Force and the Kentucky Rifle armed Sharp Shooter popping him off of his horse at a distance! They did have a habit of doing that.
    - http://twitter.com/JJJMMM1 JM
      
      Napoleon had skirmishers too, which he used extensively. Skirmishers were used by many armies at that time due to the lessons learned from previous conflicts – among others the American revolutionary war. I’m not sure if they used rifles though, or just standard muskets.
    - http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001583693060 Jonathan Alvekrans
      
      The French didn’t use rifles at the time because od the reload time and more expensive, but several other countries did.
    - Anonymous
      
      Many rifles not Bayonet compatible was another reason as well.

http://www.facebook.com/juhomattik Juho-matti Kallio

If you want more insight how effective Russians were at fighting in wintertime I suggest you read this article: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Winter_War

Anonymous

Pfff. To be fair, Stalin had killed almost all of his competent military leaders. And a big part of the Soviet troops were actually Ukrainians or from Southern Russia, IIRC, and thus not really adapted to the Northern winter. Plus the Finns had the huge, mostly uninhabited and roadless forests as a kind of a natural barrier/hiding place.

http://www.facebook.com/juhomattik Juho-matti Kallio

If you want more insight how effective Russians were at fighting in wintertime I suggest you read this article: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Winter_War

Anonymous

Uh… what you said in French translates directly to “You are shit.”

http://furlugedepot.com/ Furluge

Vampires vs. Robots followed by Vampires vs. Terminators? Augh! Get out of my head Noah! Seriously, it’s creepy when the thing I’m thinking is said by you, in the order I’m thinking it a minute after it comes up. ;p

Also, on a more serious note, it is obvious how you enjoy bitching about this series. I know that when my DVR picked up this show I instantly thought of you. ;p Now, complaining about Deadliest Warrior and the Spoony One goes hand in hand so well you can almost hear the Deadliest Warrior announcer finishing up each episode, “Who is Deadliest? But now, what does Noah Antwiler think?”

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000835307766 Yuval Ilani

you should see nerd wars http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1oUqQRHcOlo

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jeff-Jefferson/1576932429 Jeff Jefferson

You forgot about Richard “Mack” Machowicz from Future Weapons being on the show, the only one i like!

Anonymous

It’s nice to have Mack there, mostly because he’s the only person on the actual cast who knows a thing about weapons & tactics. I so can’t wait to see him talk about more modern matchups.

Anonymous

Vampires vs Werewolves is the classic match-up.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Stephen-Berkowitz/1432270584 Stephen Berkowitz

ya… but one thing which just poped into my mind , don’t werewolves only turn into werewolves once a month , vampires are always vampires , obvious advantage
- http://www.facebook.com/OmenStalker Matthew Stuckey
  
  Only in most 40′s and 50′s movies. Most legends have that werewolves can change at will, it’s just almost impossible for them not to change during a full moon.
  - Anonymous
    
    Like the Primals of Africa!

http://twitter.com/BoomDowg BoomDowg

You forgot about Richard “Mack” Machowicz from Future Weapons being on the show, the only one i like!

http://www.facebook.com/people/Andre-Aberg/677507600 André Åberg

i love that shirt!
http://www.youtube.com/user/denderfurger

Anonymous

One of my ancestors was one of the very few who survived Napoleon’s disastrous attack on Russia (I’m guessing he was part of some mercenary corps). When he returned to the United States, his mother was so overcome with joy and relief that she built a church to God for answering her prayer.

IIRC, Napoleon attacked Russia with just over half a million soldiers and retreated with less than 30 thousand remaining.

Roughly 6% of his forces survived; that’s catastrophic attrition to say the least.

So…Napoleon was impatient? No shit!

http://www.facebook.com/people/Stephanie-Paredes/100002471823133 Stephanie Paredes

Vampire vs Werewolves were the first fight I came up with when you mentioned vampires, but honestly I like the idea of Vampires vs Vulcans much, much more.

Anonymous

what about Tolkin’s Orcs they both have the same weakness to sun light!?

http://www.facebook.com/people/Daniel-Kenneth-Heintzelman/100000035261285 Daniel Kenneth Heintzelman

I’d like to see Vampires Vs Jedi or Sith.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Keith-Carlson/1707107057 Keith Carlson

Professor Spoony in the house!!

Anonymous

I have still never seen that series. I don’t really intend to either. I knew it was gonna be “bullshit” from the get-go, and would be for those weird fanboys who argue over “pirates vs ninjas”.

Still though, I do LOVE to hear you bitch about that series. Hell, I loved to hear you bitch about Wrestling I never watched either. Hearing you bitch is just fun for me, even if I enjoyed what you’re bitching about. Whether it be movies or games.

My joy comes from watching you be pissed off. And that’s a good thing. Especially when you’re FUNNY while you’re pissed off. I always go back and watch your “The Thing” review and “SWAT 4″ for that. “OH BULLSHIT!”

Keep up the fantastic work, and by all means, if you want to spend three or four hours bitching in a vlog, do it! I keep you running in the background while I do other stuff, and it’s fantastic!

http://www.facebook.com/people/Christopher-Alden/100000469737019 Christopher Alden

You should watch it. It’s such incredible bullshit, but it’s still really fun to watch.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Timothy-Scuderi/515370810 Timothy Scuderi

Great review as usual. I never watched Deadliest Warrior but I always thought it was absurd just based on the idea. It always sounded like something 2 or 3 guys that are bored (or high) as hell would try to debate.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Adam-Schrader/788849987 Adam Schrader

Vampires vs Samurai. “The Vam/Sam Slam”.

As for Daleks and Borg.. Dalek. Borg seem pretty useless against something that can’t be assimilated.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_JJS3H4USK22T2KQOKSQHOT5THQ David

Haha, this kicks ass.

Anonymous

Actually bronze isn’t lighter than iron however (didn’t watch the episode) since the bronze cannons were 6 pound and the iron was 8 pound they might have had a slimmer design.

Anonymous

Actually bronze isn’t lighter than iron however (didn’t watch the episode) since the bronze cannons were 6 pound and the iron was 8 pound they might have had a slimmer design.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Valerie-Dicaire/100000800421372 Valérie Dicaire

Why am I not surprised G. Washighton won in the end… in an american tv show… for american viewers… featuring a fight against french people… whom all american hate (for reasons that escape me I must add)… Yeaaaah. xD

PS: I’m not offended or anything, I just find it funny. If Napoleon had won, it would have been *the* twist of the century is all I’m saying!

Anonymous

they let the musketeers win one once!
http://twitter.com/Tony7wsfk Tony

In the Green Baret vs Spetsnaz episode, Spetsnaz won. But every other time they had an American unit/person, the Americans won. Also, I think most of American hatred for the French goes back to WWII. That’s the only reason I ever heard to justify it, but even then, it’s not nearly as common as it apparently was. I never knew anyone who seriously said “I hate the French. Fuck them.”
- Anonymous
  
  People who hate the French make no damn sense. The French fought in the war. So what if they backed out when they got attacked? They already used up tons of soldiers. They formed resistance groups and attacked from within the city while the Americans sat and did nothing. Are you kidding me? I’m not saying we had to join the war, but to hate the French for what was defeat, not cowardice, is just stupid. People just think the French immediately surrendered. Do some research before making blanket statements of things you got in passing. America is one of the worst countries on History, and frankly, if you didn’t even pay attention in High School history courses, you really shouldn’t talk. I can’t bleeive only about 27% of Americans only know the branches of government.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000013328759 Dylan Ihde

I used to watch this show just for how balls out ridiculous it was. Now it’s not even entertaining anymore.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000013328759 Dylan Ihde

I used to watch this show just for how balls out ridiculous it was. Now it’s not even entertaining anymore.

http://www.cuteoverload.com Jacob Barnes

I really couldn’t make it through the entire vlog. This show, and incidentally most shows on the tele (especially those on Spike), aren’t at all worth watching. The entire Pirate/Ninja premise belongs in the imagination of a 9 year old child and nowhere else. I do understand that it’s a bit frustrating to watch these fools pretend to understand the scientific method, but that concern is a bit shortsighted. It’s more worrisome that there’s even a market for this rubbish. Stop watching/reviewing this nonsense! It’s bad for your critical faculties.

Spoony, what do you think of the trailer for the upcoming prequel to The Thing?

http://www.cuteoverload.com Jacob Barnes

I really couldn’t make it through the entire vlog. This show, and incidentally most shows on the tele (especially those on Spike), aren’t at all worth watching. The entire Pirate/Ninja premise belongs in the imagination of a 9 year old child and nowhere else. I do understand that it’s a bit frustrating to watch these fools pretend to understand the scientific method, but that concern is a bit shortsighted. It’s more worrisome that there’s even a market for this rubbish. Stop watching/reviewing this nonsense! It’s bad for your critical faculties.

Spoony, what do you think of the trailer for the upcoming prequel to The Thing?

http://www.facebook.com/people/Ron-Moore/817077660 Ron Moore

Vampires vs. Robocop! Or cavemen vs. astronauts!

Seriously though, if this show doesn’t at least do Pirates vs. Ninjas, I’ll be pretty upset.

http://twitter.com/GA3050 Private

Frankly I think a show about how to fight different characters would be very interesting.
“When you the normal cheetos-eating nerd fight ( Insert name of whatever character/monster of the show) you should use these tactics.
I think I saw Spoony reading World War Z in some previous video and with research like that a pilot episode of fighting Zack should be easy to do.

Anonymous

I watched this whole video and found it interesting! my historcal knolege is limited only to events and people I find interesting and Nepolian wasn’t one of them, buut I think for the most part you got things right.
Zombies Vs. any of the previous real people on the show would be cewl to see them do. like Knights from the middle ages, Spartans, or even modern soldiers would be really awesome!
Werewolves Vs. Vampires is a nice age old moster fight line up! because they are quite even in abilities and weaknesses. A vampire is stronger and fast than a werewolf in humn form, but in wolf form the tables are turned but werewolves loose intelect in beast mode. So, yeah that’d be cewl to see them play around with!
I’d like to see you review each or aleast the main events of some of the past episodes like the Spartan vs. Ninja or Samurai as both seamed to oviously refer more to the 300 movie insted of much history!
Another thing I’d like to see them do, but I know tey can’t because of copyrights is comic book hero an villain matchups! Like Capt. America they could bring in one of those Green Berret guys for the military training part of Capt. and that Spartan guy that new shield based combat for those portions of the fight and it’d be fun to watch. and lets say put him up against Batman and bring in all those martal arts “exsperts” and se if all those mix fighting styles could hold up to the super soldier!
Ok my rabbles are done for now!

Anonymous

You’re thinking of Austerlitz in 1805 as Nappy’s big win over Russians.

Now I never saw the show in question (it sounds über retarded) and don’t know too much about the the revolutionary war and Washington’s leadership/generalship. I do know a bit about Nappy and what made him a “great general”. Part of it was his creation of a Corp system and the development of a general staff.

Previously armies would just slap their units into various ad-hoc columns (or wings) that could change day to day. As a result divisions would constantly be shuffled around during a campaign and be grouped with different commanders. Nappy created a Corp which was intended to be a permanent grouping (so units got used to working together) and were designed to be able to survive independently for a day. Nappy would then have all his Corps moving close together ready to support each other when one made contact.

The general staff allowed Nappy to send out orders quickly to his units and have them react quickly. With armies in the hundreds of thousands, units would have to be spread out over miles. Older style armies would send orders by courier on horse and hope he found the right unit, and then that the orders (handwritten) were clear and understood by the unit commander. Nappy would insure his orders were clear and unambiguous and then the orders would be sent out by 3 couriers to ensure the message got through, one or two might get lost or captured but the message would get through.

OK, blathered long enough. And you should definitely be hired to run the Deadliest Warrior (and fire everyone on that show). I love your idea of vampires vs. werewolves. Who wins? Stephanie Meyers. Who loses? Everyone. In. The. Whole. Freakin. World.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Matthew-T-McHenry/20925881 Matthew T McHenry

I’d have pit vampires against GWAR. Just the main members (Oderus, Jizmak, Balsac, Beefcake, and Flattus) against either generic vampires or popular vampires or even various incarnations of Dracula. I think that fight would be a landslide in the favor of GWAR, but I doubt there are many that could defeat them.

If I were to make Deadliest Character without using an animator, I’d buy some action figures of the characters in question and have them duke it out (much like some of your older reviews). Or if you want to go even cheaper, print out pictures of the characters and have them fight like very crappy puppets.

wrwt2

Speaking of Napoleon and Russian, it reminds me of that famous clip of stand-up comedian eddie izzard, where he talks about Hitler and how his invasion of Russia was essential the same as Napoleon’s famous f@ck up.

http://shadowdancersworldo.blip.tv/ Shadowdancer21b

“I’ve got an idea! It’s a bit cold…” Hitler came along, “I’ve gota better idea! It’s the same idea!”

http://www.facebook.com/people/Wiegeabo-Kilijabob/100000074745693 Wiegeabo Kilijabob

Spoony, if you don’t want to do Deadliest Character anymore, that’s fine. Don’t want to get in the way of your regular reviews, just please at least find some time to get us Daleks vs Borg. Otherwise it’s just the biggest cocktease ever :p

It’d be awesome to see it during the next charity drive. Maybe you could just make it an annual event. That way people won’t always bug you for it since they know when it’s coming, and it becomes something we all look forward to during the year.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Wiegeabo-Kilijabob/100000074745693 Wiegeabo Kilijabob

Spoony, if you don’t want to do Deadliest Character anymore, that’s fine. Don’t want to get in the way of your regular reviews, just please at least find some time to get us Daleks vs Borg. Otherwise it’s just the biggest cocktease ever :p

It’d be awesome to see it during the next charity drive. Maybe you could just make it an annual event. That way people won’t always bug you for it since they know when it’s coming, and it becomes something we all look forward to during the year.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000065433429 Sam Pagano

Its not entirely true that the cannon crews would try for accuracy some would instead try to have a better rate of fire then the other side and go for the More Dakka approach to aiming.

Anonymous

Next time on Deadly Warrior,
…Angry Birds

Meathead: “”Which Bird is the Best to Fuck You UP?!”"

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000065433429 Sam Pagano

Cornwallis wasnt a Lord he was a general

http://shadowdancersworldo.blip.tv/ Shadowdancer21b

Cornwallis was a lord as well. He held the rank of general.

http://twitter.com/jotakapf JotaKa

Vampires vs. Elves. Why Not?

http://twitter.com/jotakapf JotaKa

Vampires vs. Elves. Why Not?

http://www.facebook.com/people/Ben-Hekman/100000149599611 Ben Hekman

I used to like this show… ty spoony

http://twitter.com/Vanguard1219 Max Phillips

Here’s an idea; Gandalf vs Dumbledore. That’s at least *just* as serious of a matchup as Washington vs Napoleon, if not more so.

Oh, and I’m pretty sure if I wanted to see the Vampires/Werewolves match-up I could just watch “Underworld”. Honestly it would be better than whatever these guys could come up with.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Famicom-Wars/100001046150018 Famicom Wars

okay this show is on spike and I don’t think any show originated on spike has any type of credibility
Shows on Spike are usually just people dangling keys in your face.
I mean they are good if you want to have a good time and mess around but you shouldn’t really take anything they put on there seriously.
Manswers, Deadliest Warrior, and Spike Video Game Awards are all like this.
They just pander to entertainment that is goofy and easy to exploit.
basically just throwing explosions, boobs, and guts in your face.
I mean I like goofy over the top shows like Maury
but these shows should not be taken seriously
they are here just to entertain
I would like them to surprise me with an intelligent thought
but you should not expect anything like that from them

http://profiles.google.com/dan.doel Dan Doel

We’ve fed the numbers we somehow generated from hacking at pig carcasses for 20 minutes into our computer implementation of the F.A.T.A.L. ruleset. Let’s see who won!

Anonymous

You know what they should do? License out one of the Total War engines and have these battles be fought, using contributions from the modding community. Would be a great way to promote games, use of games in TV, and modding.

http://www.facebook.com/alchron Douglas Higgins

Looks like my new thing to say is “Which one fucks shit up?”

Grim 2.0

its funny the only interesting technology they use is already present in a better show, 20th century battlefields

Grim 2.0

its funny the only interesting technology they use is already present in a better show, 20th century battlefields

http://shadowdancersworldo.blip.tv/ Shadowdancer21b

Bronze cannons could cool faster. That certainly helped their case.

http://twitter.com/TheChronicler86 Corey MacDonald

great Vblog spoony

the ‘meathead’ fella on Deadlist Warrior is Geffrey Desmoulin, a “bio-medical engineer’ or at least that’s what the show lists as what he brings to the show

being a history major, much of what these guys do on the show as far as methodoligy and even basic historical facts are more than a bit suspect; I’m reminded of the time they had the 1920′s new york gangsters v.s. 1947 yakuza fight and they were testing the yakuza’s small arms(it was a german pistol, a walther I think) and one of the guys wondered why the yakuza were using a german weapon and the yakuza expert was like “germany and japan were allies during world war 2″ in a tone that said(at least to me anyway) ”you should have know that,dum dum”

Anonymous

Not to mention that the Japanese made pistols were junk. If you pressed on a part of the handle the gun would fire while the safety was still on too.
Anonymous

Not to mention that the Japanese made pistols were junk. If you pressed on a part of the handle the gun would fire while the safety was still on too.
Anonymous

Not to mention that the Japanese made pistols were junk. If you pressed on a part of the handle the gun would fire while the safety was still on too.

http://shadowdancersworldo.blip.tv/ Shadowdancer21b

Vampires vs Mummies!

Anonymous

HOBBITS vs EWOKS!!!

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_RREIUX4Y2PS5EMTUSVIYUNQYZY roberts

Not gonna say I watched all of this, which I really should before commenting on it, but do have a bit of a bone to pick with this show. It’s easily quite fake. Anybody who knows jack shit about guns and isn’t blind can see that The Ar-15 they used ejected exactly zero casings (which would be hard to do, GIVEN THAT THE FUCKING DUST COVER ON THE EJECTOR PORT WAS CLOSED!). Basically what I’m sayin’ is that the gun wasn’t actually shooting. Besides the fact that the IRA really didn’t use that many Ar-15s. They used quite a few Ar-18s, a much different weapon from the same company, along with whatever else they could get ahold of. This episode also contains the laughably fake RPG test. I’m talking rocket on a wire fake. Plus a “taliban expert” Who didn’t know jack shit about anything, swinging an RPG around with his finger on the trigger and whatnot.

TL:DR version: unsurprisingly, show’s fuckin’ fake.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_RREIUX4Y2PS5EMTUSVIYUNQYZY roberts

Wow Im dumb. Forgot to mention I was talking about the IRA vs. taliban episode. I mean, Im sure people figured it out but it must’ve been kinda confusing at first.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=673952922 Michael Thomas Clitheroe

You yanks came up with the pointless inaccuracies of Deadliest Warrior and we Brits came up with the pointless irrelevances of Time Commanders: http://youtu.be/4MQ8gIxBj4Y

Mind you i’ve gotta say that the bad science behind Deadliest does do my head in, really REALLY bad! >.<

http://www.facebook.com/people/EskimoBob-Jones/12456587 EskimoBob Jones

I wanna see Pikachu vs. Chocobo. I saw this once but Chocobo cheated. She had a ring of electricity resistance. Fight fair Chocobo.

Anonymous

Which chocobo? The ones from FF7 can survive Knights of Round x8, so I think they can handle anything Pickachu throws at them.

Anonymous

Vampires VS Cyborgs

http://www.facebook.com/jameskhaws James Haws

They should make it like DEATH BATTLE on youtube. A least that show it is completely transparent that the guys aren’t experts, especially Boomstick . Even if the battles are arguable the effects are cool and the dialogue is funny.

http://www.facebook.com/garrick.ditlefsen Garrick Ditlefsen

vampires vs. nazgul

http://www.facebook.com/people/William-Vennes/100000192174802 William Vennes

…Terminators vs an army of Robocops?

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_KQZM4I3JX6F27LT4EM2Y27IFMU Corey

there actually is a game called robocop vs the terminator for the snes.
http://pulse.yahoo.com/_KQZM4I3JX6F27LT4EM2Y27IFMU Corey

there actually is a game called robocop vs the terminator for the snes.

http://www.facebook.com/people/William-Vennes/100000192174802 William Vennes

…Terminators vs an army of Robocops?

Anonymous

Huh, you know I half expected Spoony’s brother to be in this video as well. They work so well together and make a hilarious duo. Miles is the lean back, suave, cool minded thinker while Noah is the hyper/energetic, fast talking joke machine making up material as he goes along. I don’t know, maybe it’s just me but I really think he should have had him here for this one. :P

http://twitter.com/BigPuppy_Stuart Stuart Phip

Vampire Vs. Chaos Marines could be fun.

Also Mechagodzilla Vs Megazord was wonderful.

Anonymous

If I had time I could animate it on CG for you. But my college schedule is very hard and it would take me full-time to do it, so it is impossible.

http://twitter.com/JJJMMM1 JM

Spoony made a common mistake when he stated that Napoleon was out to conquer. This was not really the case. Most of the regions Napoleon annexed in mainland Europe were concessions made by the losing side in Napoleon’s defensive wars against the many coalitions he faced. He did have a strong vision of a united Europe under unified laws and he wanted to control everything, but his mentality was nothing like those of Alexander the Great or Genghis Khan.

Even the disastrous Russian campaign wasn’t an invasion to conquer, altough he certainly can be blamed for what happened. He wanted to beat the Russian army quickly. He tried to face the Russian army and got a bit worried when he couldn’t do it in Lithuania as the Russians just retreated and burned everything. He couldn’t do it in Smolensk either nor in Moscow – same thing. He got sucked in too deep with his huge army and when the weather changed after the relatively nice and deceptive fall weather, well, things started to get really bad.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1773999451 Joshua Tkachenko

Any chance of successfully invading the Russian Empire disappeared on 21 October 1805 when Nelson destroyed his fleet, a navy would have given him better options but a lot of other pieces would have had to been in place as well. He should have marched up the Baltic and taken the capital instead of chasing Barclay and Kutuzov around the interior for the entire autumn. Still would not have been victorious, but would have forced the Russians to come to him.
Anonymous

And his decision to invade Russia was to force them to follow his “continental” system that banned trade with Britain. That system was his only recourse to getting Britain to negotiate a peace treaty since she was essentially untouchable to Nappy without a fleet. And Britain would never have peace with Nappy for fear that the egalitarian revolution would cross the channel (remember officers in the English army would purchase purchase their ranks, an option only open in general to the aristocracy and gentry).
Anonymous

It’s easy to criticise/make fun of Napoleon who tried to conquer Russia
in winter, but it should be remembered that it was in the times when
travel was not as easy as it is today, AND considering that Napoleon was
born in Corsica (so, Mediterranean climate). Even the northernmost
parts of France are by the sea, so they have a mild climate. Today
people travel more and they are aware of how different a winter feels in
colder climates, but Napoleon’s idea of “harsh winter” was probably
something along the lines of “so… it will be snowing?”. Yes, he
underestimated Russian weather, but what it was actually like was likely
beyond his imagination.

To give you context: I remember reading that one of the Napoleon’s
soldiers who actually survived the retreat wrote in his diary that when
they were walking, someone was actually dropping dead from the cold
every few steps. The others would just strip any clothing off him and
continue walking. Napoleon probably would have trouble imagining winter
harsh enough to make a person fall unconscious/dead from the cold while
*walking*. Incidentally, those of Napoleon’s soldiers that were from
that region of Europe (like, for instance, Poles) had vastly better
survival rates during the retreat than, say, Italian-born soldiers.
- http://twitter.com/JJJMMM1 JM
  
  Again, Napoleon didn’t try to conquer Russia. He tried to force a decisive battle against the Russian army that was retreating in order to be able to dictate the terms of the peace.
  
  He marched to Lithuania in June 1812 and occupied Moscow in September. He didn’t really attack Russia in winter, but he went waaaay too deep and stayed for way too long before deciding to retreat. He seriously contemplated retreating when he failed to engage the Russian main army in Smolensk. Retreat at that point would’ve absolutely been the correct decision, but it would’ve been a big political loss and Napoleon didn’t want that. He thought he could force a decisive battle at Moscow, but he couldn’t. Even though he beat the Russians at a big battle in Borodino, he failed to destroy the army, which was a big lost opportunity. Russians retreated and burned Moscow to the ground, which left Napoleon’s troops without shelter.
  
  Saying that Napoleon didn’t know what harsh winter is because he is from France is a bit silly. He fought all over Europe in just about every weather and altitude during his career. But the Russian climate was certainly something he underestimated.
  
  Napoleon was warned repeatedly of the Russian winter by Marshal Caulaincourt, who prior to the war was Napoleon’s ambassador to Russia and knew the climate well. He also knew Czar Alexander. Napoleon suspected that Caulaincourt was sympathetic to his friend Alexander and wanted to avoid war because of this. Napoleon was further mislead by the unusually nice fall weather of 1812, which of course later turned really bad. Caulaincourt later wrote a book called “At Napoleon’s Side in Russia” where he describes his experiences in the Russian campaign. It’s pretty horrific stuff, but offers interesting insight to Napoleon and his staff:
  http://www.amazon.com/At-Napoleons-Side-Russia-Eyewitness/dp/1929631170
  
  Napoleon is responsible for the destruction of Grande Armée. He later said that if he had started the withdraw two weeks earlier, he could have saved his army. True or not, the campaign was a mistake and Napoleon made several other mistakes during the campaign. He can be criticized for a reason.
  - Anonymous
    
    The Russian climate is definitely deceptive. Most of Russia has a really striking contrast between a hot summer and a freezing winter and almost no autumn or spring to speak of. The weather turns from hot to cold incredibly quickly almost without a warning.
    
    Also, Russia is huge compared to other European countries. It’s easy to forget how long it takes to get from point A to point B. Although he probably thought of that, I’d imagine.
Anonymous

Don’t even get me started on Alexander vs whichever Khan it was. My god, if you’re going to pit weaponry a 1000 years a part from each other, you HAVE TO take into consideration that Alexander was a conquerer with an army. Again, who decides what is fair and what makes the man? In Washington’s aftermath, they tried to back this, “army size doesn’t matter, we’re looking at the general tactics”…wtf?! It’s completely neglecting facts and one real thing: if they weren’t a great general of their time they’d not have such an army if they were constnantly battling! They’d all be dead or no one would follow them. What the hell? Okay, okay, so are we smushing history together and saying, “well if it’s only for his time, then this is how he’d be good now.” Fuck you. If you’re doing that then give them all fuckin machine guns. I’d almsot bet you that Alexander would be better than Washington with a machine gun simply for the fact that his reign was based on innovation. Washington might think too hard on it, try to figure it out, where as Alexander would try it out and figure, “hey, this is what it does.” Given ethics of the time, the idea of magic (and detesting it, as opposed to the Greeks worshiping the idea) Washington might even be reluctant to use it. I’m sure he would eventually but if you just through them into a sim together…well, I guess they’d both pull the trigger first and it’s whoever got lucky and was aiming in the right direction…I digress.

Fact of the matter is, the only way to take them into consideration is with ALL THE FACTS. You can’t change history because then you can argue, “well, if Alexander never had his army size, he’d not exist.” So, would Alexander and Kahn ever meet on the battle field? Probably not, as Khan would just be raiding…he’d never attack an army that size head on…even if he tried to pick soldiers off here and there, with ballista, as even the sim showed, they’d be getting picked off from time to time. 1 out of 100 it was. For 1. Now imagine a line of them aimed at a group of horses.

In conclusion, the msotl iekly scenario there would be Alexander would get wise to Khan’s pattern and surround him at a strategic momment, and slaughter him, or Khan would be wise to this via scouts (did he use scouts while raiding? I don’t even think so…) and not get surrounded, run away, and they never fight.

Fact of the matter is, when you are taking away a culture’s technological advantage by facing them with technology 1000 years in the future, you cannot take away their number’s advantage either. It’s just way too stupid.

Back to Naploeon and Washington—the gab is only decades, but I still must raise this argument: would Napoleon invade America? If he did, would he only bring five men? If Washington invaded France, would he stand a chance? Seriously, DW? C’mon… What is your deffinition of fair, why is war gotta be fair, and what is your deffinition of Washington? The First President and General of Colonial America? If you’re going that route, then he was also Napoleons ally. What are your rules DW? Do you make them up from show to show so show to make it seem more interesting? It isn’t. It’d be far more interesting to try to show it naturally. Alexander walks so fuckin long that he stumbles upon Khan raiding a village or gets surrounded by what, 1000 men? Right…
Anonymous

Don’t even get me started on Alexander vs whichever Khan it was. My god, if you’re going to pit weaponry a 1000 years a part from each other, you HAVE TO take into consideration that Alexander was a conquerer with an army. Again, who decides what is fair and what makes the man? In Washington’s aftermath, they tried to back this, “army size doesn’t matter, we’re looking at the general tactics”…wtf?! It’s completely neglecting facts and one real thing: if they weren’t a great general of their time they’d not have such an army if they were constnantly battling! They’d all be dead or no one would follow them. What the hell? Okay, okay, so are we smushing history together and saying, “well if it’s only for his time, then this is how he’d be good now.” Fuck you. If you’re doing that then give them all fuckin machine guns. I’d almsot bet you that Alexander would be better than Washington with a machine gun simply for the fact that his reign was based on innovation. Washington might think too hard on it, try to figure it out, where as Alexander would try it out and figure, “hey, this is what it does.” Given ethics of the time, the idea of magic (and detesting it, as opposed to the Greeks worshiping the idea) Washington might even be reluctant to use it. I’m sure he would eventually but if you just through them into a sim together…well, I guess they’d both pull the trigger first and it’s whoever got lucky and was aiming in the right direction…I digress.

Fact of the matter is, the only way to take them into consideration is with ALL THE FACTS. You can’t change history because then you can argue, “well, if Alexander never had his army size, he’d not exist.” So, would Alexander and Kahn ever meet on the battle field? Probably not, as Khan would just be raiding…he’d never attack an army that size head on…even if he tried to pick soldiers off here and there, with ballista, as even the sim showed, they’d be getting picked off from time to time. 1 out of 100 it was. For 1. Now imagine a line of them aimed at a group of horses.

In conclusion, the msotl iekly scenario there would be Alexander would get wise to Khan’s pattern and surround him at a strategic momment, and slaughter him, or Khan would be wise to this via scouts (did he use scouts while raiding? I don’t even think so…) and not get surrounded, run away, and they never fight.

Fact of the matter is, when you are taking away a culture’s technological advantage by facing them with technology 1000 years in the future, you cannot take away their number’s advantage either. It’s just way too stupid.

Back to Naploeon and Washington—the gab is only decades, but I still must raise this argument: would Napoleon invade America? If he did, would he only bring five men? If Washington invaded France, would he stand a chance? Seriously, DW? C’mon… What is your deffinition of fair, why is war gotta be fair, and what is your deffinition of Washington? The First President and General of Colonial America? If you’re going that route, then he was also Napoleons ally. What are your rules DW? Do you make them up from show to show so show to make it seem more interesting? It isn’t. It’d be far more interesting to try to show it naturally. Alexander walks so fuckin long that he stumbles upon Khan raiding a village or gets surrounded by what, 1000 men? Right…

http://www.facebook.com/people/Matt-Adams/100000590812952 Matt Adams

Actually the recoil on the m-16 is almost non existence.Since when aiming your nose will be touching the weapon itself, so your shoulder would be safe firing a m-16.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jean-Dickinson/100002641992937 Jean Dickinson

Look at what channel it is on; Spike T.V. You can not possibly get some guys that have clearly not gotten over there collage VS. days to host a show with any “real” history in it. If you had people with the back grounds and the intelligence of a historian not someone with the brain of a single cell amoeba that is spewing forth nonsense. There needs to be someone that knows the weapons and how army’s fought. And I’m sorry to say that until Spike T.V gets it’s shit together then all it will be is a sad sack of grown boys laughing at explosions.

http://twitter.com/JJJMMM1 JM

Also, Napoleon wasn’t really French. Or he was, but he was born in Corsica and for a long time considered himself Corsican. He never learned to speak French without an Italian accent.

As a military plotter, in my opinion, he’s unmatced in history. Yes, his trademarks were fast marches and fast strikes where the enemy is weak, but he was also a schemer and very good at manipulating enemies.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000941355977 Tate Renforth-Frederick

Hey man if you need some animators me and a couple of guys i know who love your show would be happy to make a Dalek vs. Borg deadliest character for you

http://twitter.com/Jegsimmons James Simmons

clone/storm troopers vs ODSTs

serenity vs the melinium falcon
Lobo vs deadpool
r2d2 vs johnny 5
rooster cogburn vs han solo

thats just a few.
actually spoony, your history is pretty good. not specific but generally speaking.

Anonymous

I don’t know who the other guy is, but Han Solo shoots first, so…

Anonymous

I’m tellin’ ya, Reb Brown vs. The Clones of Bruce Lee. Other possibilities are Terl vs. the Space Thunder Kids or Tidus’s face vs. a chainsaw.

http://twitter.com/JJJMMM1 JM

I just watched my first episode of Deadliest Warrior. It was pretty brutal. Their analysis was just nonsense based on horrible over-simplifications. The show is extremely dumb, but I guess it’s pretty harmless. The format Spoony proposed could be interesting if they got the right people to do it.

Kids: watch the show if you want, but read the real history yourselves! Believe me, history is far more interesting when it’s not filtered through half a dozen idiots. If you want to know what really happened in the battle of Austerlitz, for example, I bet you can find dozens of documentaries of that on torrent or youtube.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_JJS3H4USK22T2KQOKSQHOT5THQ David

The way you explained how you would have done the show actually sounds better and more interesting. Boring for most i suppose, but sounds way better than the original.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Grzegorz-Wojtczyk/100000046280578 Grzegorz Wojtczyk

And that’s why I like Mythbusters more.

Jamal Prewitt

How about Optimus Prime versus Voltron?

http://www.facebook.com/topi.vuorela Topi Vuorela

Vampires vs. Reservoir dogs!

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1309218787 Teppo Luoma

Finnish television channel MTV3 MAX showed only first season. I must admit that I watched show but it was very clear on first episode that show was only pure entertainment. Historic and especially medical facts in this show were quite poor. I must say that I found this Vlog far more interesting than show itself :)

http://www.facebook.com/people/Richard-Casellas/838455062 Richard Casellas

Pikmin vs Time Bandits, ‘little things hitting each other!’
I think the master race idea is more original and has more potential than another death battle (I love death battle Bieber vs Black was hilarious), Borg vs Daleks could be amazing. All the histories and technical jargon… Make it so!
I will now search for this ‘Deadliest warrior’

Anonymous

William Shakepheare vs Pablo Picaso.

I say Shakepheare would have the queen of England invite Picaso over and then kill him, but that’s just my personal belief.

Now, if Shakepheare is retarded by Deadliest Warrior, he’d request an invasion of America, and then, since it’s the 1900′s opposed to the 1600′s, we’d obviously take this as a threat and simple destroy all of 1600′s England.

Again…just pointing out the lack of intelligence factor in the show… The only time this was ever adjested in a real mannor was when the–I forgot, the Manner dudes dances and stuck their tongue out and monk was like, “wtf is this shit?”—but that played nothing into the way they fought. I–for the life of me—do not get why the ninja didn’t just stay up in the tree chucking shit at the Spartan until he got clove enough to be in danger of the spear. Seriously. He shot a blowdart at the dude while in cover and the Spartan somehow–almsot like spidey-sensed it and blocked it and the ninja IMMEDIATELY says “well, fuck being a ninja, I’m running out into the opening and chucking a tiny piece of metal at his shield!” wtf?! Remember how he lost? Jumping off the shield into the sword? Why not throw the damn star into his neck then? If the Spartan ignored that certaintly he’d bleed out from the adreneline it takes to keep someone in that mindset from a neck wound.

Also, I love how the Ninja was depected as being completely un-inovative. Isn’t that what a makes a ninja a ninja? Once he got the Spartan in the chain, it was like his mind was only turned onto using that…why not take that opportunity to have another weapon ready and, ya know, strategize something? Pull the Spartan quickly, jerking him, then go for a blow with another weapon while letting go of that one. No glory without risk, yo.

They always depect loser as being a moron. That’s why they lose… …but you can be dumber than your opponent and still be smart. Are you trying to tell me that everyone was retarded in ever mannor but weaponry back then? That people didn’t have any type of commong sense? How did we get here, then?

Didn’t Rome and Greece and Egypt have inventers and politicians, some over 5 thousand years ago? Yet a fuckin Ninja doesn’t know when to react to opportunity? He just sits to see the results? You should know what your damn weapon does!

http://twitter.com/Kesdaw Sarah Wallura

Vampires vs. zombies would be really interesting.

The vampires have the advantage in that they are fairly smart. Smart as in, know how to use a weapon, strategies and traps. Thats why I find Vampires vs Werwolfs less interesting, because both are fairly smart, which makes the outcome of a battle dependant on the individual.
Zombies can win by numbers and, if they turn all humans, the deprive vampires of their food-source.
Zombies also don’t have the restraints of Vampires ( most usefully sunlight, or the regretably forgotten OCD) but lack any form of organisation or leadership.
All it would take to get rid of the Zombies would be building one big wall around your country and let in only non-infected.

The most interesting aspect would be the raising of an army.
Now, Zombies do this naturally. The bite you in the pinky-toe, you turn into a Zombie.
Vampires would have the problem that, with every human they turn into a Vampire, there are less humans to get blood from (that raises the question wether the vampires in question actually need human blood, or if a substitue like animal blood or coffee would do the trick).

But all in all, I still think Vampires would win, for the same reasons humans would win in a Zombie Apocalypse, they can just grab a gun and shoot Zombies, probably even without having to worry about getting infected themself.

Same goes for “Single Zombie vs. single Vampire in a Pit without Weapons”, if the vampire doesn’t have to worry about getting infected, they can just bash the Zombies head in on the floor.

Anonymous

Here’s the secret to defeated normal zombies: stay home in high places.

Zombies are very uncoordinated, walking dead bodies who will get all sorts of dings and injuries just trying to get where you are. The sun, or the cold winter, is also probably one of the worst things for any zombie, since they can’t regulate their own temperature and the heat in particular would accelerate decay.

The vampires could literally overtake the zombies while asleep.
- http://twitter.com/JJJMMM1 JM
  
  That would be the case. Still, I see the Deadliest Warrior crew stating that
  
  a) Zombies have a MASSIVE NUMBER ADVANTAGE. They CLEARLY win in this category.
  b) Vampires can only fight during night hours. Therefore the zombies are TWO TIMES MORE POWERFUL!!!
  
  Don’t expect them to take into consideraton the length of the day or fighting indoors. They might also say that vampires can’t fight in churches because of all the crucifixes. Therefore zombies are MORE VERSATILE.
  
  Then they’ll have zombie & vampire actors bite through the jugular of a pig, which represents a human victim:
  Zombie: “He’s dead.”
  Vampire: “He’s dead. But vampires can’t do that if the dude has eaten a garlic pizza. Zombies win.”
  
  After all that, they’ll have a bullshit simulation which the vampires win, because they are more popular.
- http://twitter.com/JJJMMM1 JM
  
  That would be the case. Still, I see the Deadliest Warrior crew stating that
  
  a) Zombies have a MASSIVE NUMBER ADVANTAGE. They CLEARLY win in this category.
  b) Vampires can only fight during night hours. Therefore the zombies are TWO TIMES MORE POWERFUL!!!
  
  Don’t expect them to take into consideraton the length of the day or fighting indoors. They might also say that vampires can’t fight in churches because of all the crucifixes. Therefore zombies are MORE VERSATILE.
  
  Then they’ll have zombie & vampire actors bite through the jugular of a pig, which represents a human victim:
  Zombie: “He’s dead.”
  Vampire: “He’s dead. But vampires can’t do that if the dude has eaten a garlic pizza. Zombies win.”
  
  After all that, they’ll have a bullshit simulation which the vampires win, because they are more popular.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Eli-Gionet/634762106 Eli Gionet

The only reason the Ewoks won in RotJ, was because chewbacca got his hands on the AT-ST (chicken walker). In a strait up, non interference fight, I think the Stormtroopers would win.

http://www.facebook.com/KamiTsurugi Richard Colom

Using fictional creatures like vampires and zombies and werewolves would probably actually be worse for this type of thing because there are so many iterations. With a historical army, you at least have SOME historical data that you can use in calculations, though the concept is still flawed. With fictional creatures, though, there is no historical evidence and there are different versions. For vampires, you have: Classic, stereotypical “Dracula” vampires, Buffy/Angel vampires, Sparklepires, vampires like Alucard from the Hellsing and Hellsing Ultimate Series anime, etc. The one creature with the most consistency I can think of would be werewolves, but even then you have issues like whether they can turn whenever, like Underworld’s Lycans, or only during the full moon, as well as other issues. You have to be really specific as to what you are referring to. Like in your Megazord vs. Mechagodzilla, going off that title, you can’t tell which Megazord is being referred to at first or whether one is referring to the original Mechagodzilla, Super Mecha G, or Kiryu.

Also, I think the one historical thing I can really call you out on is the fact that the Japanese, if I recall, did beat the Russians in the early 1900s, due to being considerably more technologically advanced. It was the defeat by the Japanese that led to Russia’s Industrial Revolution, if I recall.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1773999451 Joshua Tkachenko

You should probably look more into the Russo-Japanese War, technology had little to do with the defeat-> it was logistics, extremely poor morale, and pretty poor leadership. The Baltic Fleet (Re-designated The 2nd Pacific Squadron) was quite modern and carried wireless telegraphs. They even made the impressive journey from Sankt Petersburg around the Cape of Good Hope, across the Indian Ocean and were spotted at night transiting the Tsushima Straight due to the required lighting on a hospital ship when they were attempting to make a run through the Sea of Japan to Vladivostok. Poor leadership and poor morale and poor training lead to the decisive victory for Admiral Togo, and eventually the victory for Japan. This lead to no “Industrial Revolution” in the Russian Empire, though it lead to many things that sewed the seeds for revolution, a revolution that would actually achieve industrialization. This war was a major reason for the Kronstadt Sailors to support the Febuary and October Revolutions of 1917 and it lead directly to the 1905 Revolution that caused Nicholas II to form the Duma.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jacen-Chen/532265634 Jacen Chen

Don’t worry Spoony. If you have fired a real M16, it wouldn’t dislocate your shoulder. It’s actually pretty soft even in full auto

Anonymous

Darleks vs Borg boils down to one thing: when.

The Daleks on Skaro, imperfect and mutated organic matter with cybernetic augmentation, probably wouldn’t be worth a Borg cube’s time to scan much less harvest. Whereas Darleks post Time War, where by all counts they had defeated the Timelords, would be the same as one Darlek vs billions of Cybermen: an uneven fight in favor of the Darlek.

Inbetween you’re talking about a race of genetically damaged but crafted fascist super geniuses another that’s basically a hivemind which doesn’t actually use any special abilities of the races it possesses. Just wastes them like ant drones in figuring out how to magically techno a defense.

http://www.saisasylum.com/ Sai

Shouldn’t it be Borg vs. Cybermen?

Anonymous

Agreed, that would be a much MUCH more balanced fight. The Daleks are essentially tied for the most powerful agency in the universe, it wouldn’t be fair.

http://www.facebook.com/jfrapart Joel Frapart

Dude! Vampires vs. Immortals from Highlander. Dracula vs. Connor Mcloud man!

Anonymous

Spoony, did you already know about the planned “Vampires vs Zombies” episode? James “The Angry Video Game Nerd” posted a video today from Comic Con and confirms that it is going to happen.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Paul-De-Boer/510663220 Paul De Boer

try putting a ferrite toroid on the audio cable. sometimes a charge can build up on those things.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_QPY55WROZXEUPXOA6SLLRI33RM TLLL

Here’s a SPOONYBIB if you are interested in warfare from 1689-1815. It’s a starter for giving context to Napoleon and Wellington.

While these often don’t directly deal with Napoleon and Washington, they set the stage for stuff and understanding what warfare was like and thus the combat environment in which both Napoleon and Washington dealt in. Use them as a guide to contextualize stuff.

Napoleon’s famous battle is Austerlitz.

Personally, I think Frederick the Great’s Wars, the Peninsular Campaign, and the French and Indian Wars in North America are cooler.

John Keegan’s chapters on Waterloo from the Face of Battle and the chapter on the Duke of Wellington from the Mask of Command. Start with him. He’s quick ands readable and you can test the waters to see if you like it.

Anything by Christopher Duffy, such as The Military Experience in the Age of Reason and his work on Frederick the Great.

Anything by Jeremy Black such as his Warfare in the Eighteenth Century and Britain as a military power, 1688-1815.

Guy Chet’s the European Conquest of the American Wilderness Again just starters that dont often deal directly with Napoleon, Washington and the American Revolutionary War. Instead,
These books and authors give context. Further, there are other works by these authors that do deal with Napoleon and Washington and the American Revolution as well. Operate from them.

Bottom line fuck Deadliest Warrior. Do Jeremy Black, Christopher Duffy, and John Keegan as starters.

Anonymous

How about the fact that if Napoleon came to America he’d be in it to conquer it, shut up some rufians?
http://twitter.com/JJJMMM1 JM

Jeremy Black is a good writer, but he’s… how to put this… very British. He tends to highlight and defend British actions and belittle the French as if he was personally working for Pitt the Younger. I haven’t read much of his work, but the personal bias in what are clearly his own conclusions and opinions seem a bit weird for a historian to me.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_QPY55WROZXEUPXOA6SLLRI33RM TLLL

Here’s a SPOONYBIB if you are interested in warfare from 1689-1815. It’s a starter for giving context to Napoleon and Wellington.

While these often don’t directly deal with Napoleon and Washington, they set the stage for stuff and understanding what warfare was like and thus the combat environment in which both Napoleon and Washington dealt in. Use them as a guide to contextualize stuff.

Napoleon’s famous battle is Austerlitz.

Personally, I think Frederick the Great’s Wars, the Peninsular Campaign, and the French and Indian Wars in North America are cooler.

John Keegan’s chapters on Waterloo from the Face of Battle and the chapter on the Duke of Wellington from the Mask of Command. Start with him. He’s quick ands readable and you can test the waters to see if you like it.

Anything by Christopher Duffy, such as The Military Experience in the Age of Reason and his work on Frederick the Great.

Anything by Jeremy Black such as his Warfare in the Eighteenth Century and Britain as a military power, 1688-1815.

Guy Chet’s the European Conquest of the American Wilderness Again just starters that dont often deal directly with Napoleon, Washington and the American Revolutionary War. Instead,
These books and authors give context. Further, there are other works by these authors that do deal with Napoleon and Washington and the American Revolution as well. Operate from them.

Bottom line fuck Deadliest Warrior. Do Jeremy Black, Christopher Duffy, and John Keegan as starters.

http://twitter.com/EriksBlue Ashley Baillie

You talking about this is more interesting than the actual show, man. I would love to hear you talk about later episodes of the show, The Deadliest warrior in my opinion is a history channel show mishandled and broadcasted Spike TV.

http://twitter.com/EriksBlue Ashley Baillie

You talking about this is more interesting than the actual show, man. I would love to hear you talk about later episodes of the show, The Deadliest warrior in my opinion is a history channel show mishandled and broadcasted Spike TV.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001202727521 Richard Ciavardone

you know what’s sad that they was a rip-off called animal face-off and it alot better then this show

http://www.facebook.com/people/Tariel-Corbeau/1388782046 Tariel Corbeau

Actually, that show came out….I think three years BEFORE this. So they ripped it off. The show animal face off was made by people that were researchers of animals, pure and simple. They know animals they study behavior and actually took that behavior along with the animals claws, teeth, pack, etc. The show got canceled because of the production costs. They actually made aluminum models of teeth, and claws, and subjected them to the calculated bite strength/muscles strength of the animal. It costs a LOT to make that kind of model.
Animal face off is a better show because they do have one episode were a wolf faces off against a lion. While the lion does win one on one, the pack of wolves would kill the lion. This is a good way to have your show. Though one on one the psychically stronger animal wins, it is the pack of animals that wins over that. Then there is the jaguar vs anaconda. The jaguar has the mentality to NEVER give up. It is this mentality that gets it killed in the fight.
……
Yeah…I watched animal planet/discovery a lot around the time it came on… But this show is worth checking out. It is far far better then Deadliest Warrior. If only because you get to see a tiger vs a brown bear. That fight was just epic.
- http://www.facebook.com/people/Tariel-Corbeau/1388782046 Tariel Corbeau
  
  I looked it up it is five years apart. This came out 2004, deadliest warrior is 2009.
- http://www.facebook.com/people/Tariel-Corbeau/1388782046 Tariel Corbeau
  
  I looked it up it is five years apart. This came out 2004, deadliest warrior is 2009.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001202727521 Richard Ciavardone

you know what’s sad that they was a rip-off called animal face-off and it alot better then this show

http://twitter.com/boogybunny Mireille Sillander

Why not vampires vs zombies? Both are different kind of “undead” with similar types of procreation, so I’d be really interested how it would turn out even though it’s really hard to quantify which method of infection would be more effective or if there would be crossbreeds.
Vampires vs werewolves? Pretty sure they made a movie series about that with lots of sulky people in latex. Oh and True Blood. And probably a bucketfull of other pieces of every medium ever.
How about vampires/zombies vs stormtroopers or The Flying Dutchman or harpies.

Anonymous

Vampires would totally outclass the zombies (although I suppose it depends on what kind of vampires you’re talking about).
- http://profiles.google.com/dan.doel Dan Doel
  
  Depends on the zombies, too, probably. The super-agile/strong/fast/whatever rage zombies are popular these days, and the lumbering, “brains,” type zombies that I tend to think of (and I can only assume Spoony does, too) are out of style.
  
  Vampires vs. zombies is a little less one-sided if you go with the former, I guess.
  - Cameron Brannan
    
    Are you sure? Look at the zombies from Day of the Dead or Shaun of the Dead, they could rip people limb from limb with no trouble and were always a sea of walking corpses. Ignoring Deadliest Warriors inability to realize that, vampires would probably end up getting swamped easily.
    
    The best zombies would be the ones from Return of the Living Dead, but that would be way too one-sided since those zombies were unkillable, could run, talk, and still use their brains.
    - Matrim
      
      Again, depends on the vampire type (which is a bigger variety than the zombie types). Some vampires can change shape into bats, mist, wolves, etc. which would make it extremely difficult to swamp. Some vampires have magic (being able to set zombies on fire is a significant advantage). Some vampires have super speed and strength, meaning the zombies would be completely outclassed physically. Almost all vampires are already dead and thus immune to zombification.
      
      Arguably (and embarrassingly), even some of the lamest vampires would be effectively immune to zombies. Take Twilight (please! *rimshot*), those vampires could essentially stand in the middle of a crowd of zombies and literally let them break themselves on their nigh indestructible bodies.
      
      It’s really not a great matchup if you’re actually interested in outcomes. Maybe if it were a group of vampires vs a full-fledged zombie apocalypse it’d be more interesting.
- Anonymous
  
  They are doing the super fast vampires vs regular zombies and factoring in the ability to spread the zombie plague which doesn’t even begin to make sense if they are chawking it up to 5v5.

Andrew Harvey

What? The American team won? No way! Am I the only one who has noticed that the American team always seems to win? Every time I’ve watched this show when it has an American team, the American team wins. American Cowboys vs Italian Mafia, the Cowboys won. SWAT vs GSG 9, Swat won. Washington vs Napoleon, Washington wins. I don’t know, I’m kinda sensing a bias here.

Anonymous

Russia won.
http://twitter.com/JJJMMM1 JM

I don’t think the show or its conclusions should be taken too seriously :). The comparison is of course silly, but I don’t see a historian seriously picking Washington over Napoleon when talking about military skill. Napoleon was a military leader his whole life (commander of the French army in Italy since he was 26). He lead troops in just about every conditions imaginable, crossing the Alps, conquering and defending Egypt and fighting all over the mainland of Europe. He fought and won more battles than Alexander the Great, Caesar and Frederick the Great combined, sometimes with troops that were poorly equipped or starving.

One on one I’d give to Washington :). Washington’s sense of diplomacy was also superior. Even tough Napoleon was far from stupid in foreign politics, he made big mistakes. He should’ve used many of his victories to create allies instead of subjugating the beaten.
Anonymous

I think you’re probably right, Andrew. At least that’s how it seems to me. They also had the SEALs win over the Israeli special forces. The only time they had a foreign country’s warrior win over an American was Green Beret v. Spetsnaz

Anonymous

Vampires vs He-Man.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Patrik-Roslund/100000885845191 Patrik Roslund

Spoony youre grasp on history is quite remarkable for a American not living in newengland ;P Especialy love your comments about russia. It’s true dont fuck whit them.
Napoleon has been badmouthed by the rest of europe and by extension the US. he was quite a remarkable person, and he never started a war. The rest of europe didnt like him because he was a product of the revolution and not of “royalblood”. Yeah he was an asshole in many ways but so were the rest of the European leaders at the time.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_546UPA6SLRGQHT5OYV3TLDU76Y zherryzhohn

Is there a way to just get the audio version of your vlogs? I don’t know if blip is just going really slow lately or if your videos are just uncompressed and too high for my internet to stream comfortably. Most people probably don’t give your vlogs their full attention and track your every move. They’re more likely doing what i do and just listening to you while playing mvc2 for hours just to unlock the alternate costume of the lego ripoff server robot even though you’re never going to use him… just like you do with a podcast. Anyways, if there was a way to get just audio in the future so things load smoother, that would just be dandy. ty

http://twitter.com/JJJMMM1 JM

How about:

Admiral Nelson – Captain Nemo
Cleopatra – Margaret Thatcher (CATFIGHT!)
Moby Dick – Jaws
Secutor Flamma – Fedor Emelianenko
Robin Hood & merry men – Bonnie and Clyde
The Flying Dutchman – Ghostbusters

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1773999451 Joshua Tkachenko

Ahab v Jaws/Brody v Moby Dick 2 hour special..
Anonymous

Moby Dick would totally win. Bull sperm whales have no predators other than humans, nothing in the sea (the great white shark included) can seriously threaten it. I mean, seriously, these things routinely kill colossal squid ferchrissakes!
- Anonymous
  
  Except Jaws is 30 feet, not 24 and a Shark’s killer instinct is to either go directly for kill shots or to hinder movement, meaning Jaws would ambush and tear a fin before the fight even formally starts. He would. It’s how sharks go.
  
  It takes multiple Kilelr Whales to kill one great white, so really, I think Jaws could win, envermind the fact that he fought gun powder as opposed to spears and well, Moby Dick was based on a real kind f whale wear as Jaws survived exploding. So…..
  - Matrim
    
    First of all, by Quint’s estimate the shark from Jaws was 25 feet long and about 3 tons of fish. By comparison, a sperm whale is about 65 feet long and 56 tons. Additionally, orca whales are capable of killing great whites in very humiliating fashions (even one on one)…and an orca is completely incapable of threatening an adult sperm whale.
    
    I’m sorry, but great whites simply cannot predate a healthy bull sperm whale. To say nothing of Moby Dick, who was prodigious in his size and power. Moby Dick would probably be able to kill a 25 foot shark in a single bite, whereas the shark would have to ineffectually tear at the whale time and again to even inflict a minor injury.
  - Matrim
    
    Also, the shark from Jaws didn’t survive exploding. It was a different shark in every film. I suppose the shark from Jaws 2 survived being burned a little, but that’s hardly an achievement.
Anonymous

Moby Dick would totally win. Bull sperm whales have no predators other than humans, nothing in the sea (the great white shark included) can seriously threaten it. I mean, seriously, these things routinely kill colossal squid ferchrissakes!
Anonymous

Moby Dick would totally win. Bull sperm whales have no predators other than humans, nothing in the sea (the great white shark included) can seriously threaten it. I mean, seriously, these things routinely kill colossal squid ferchrissakes!

http://www.facebook.com/people/Mike-Triplett/1028632148 Mike Triplett

Blown apart by Bonaparte you just can’t buy good jokes like that

REMY Pierrick

Your french was quite good on this ! Is it Benzai’s influence ? =)

REMY Pierrick

Your french was quite good on this ! Is it Benzai’s influence ? =)

http://twitter.com/rockplants Dominic

I don’t know if someone already said this but Vampires Vs Zombies is suppose to be the season finale of Deadliest Warrior so yeah I agree with you Spoony it should be Vampires vs Werewolves. I keep saying this over and over and I would say its probably getting old but Sharks Vs Bears! It would be the best and most controversial. One dwells on land the other at sea. Who is Deadliest? anyways take it easy

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_4LM23I53VCE4KUVGC4GI6XYCVU toms

Napoleon Vs Washington, that is not much of a contest in terms of Army vs Army. Napoleon came later so he had better tech. And Washington did fight the French when he was a lower level CO, and he lost and was captured, caused an international incident which caused the French and Indian war which the British paid for later by raising taxes on the colonies which pissed off the American and caused them to revolt. Not to mention that Washington’s army was supplied and funded almost entirely by the French (we are talking about 98% of rebel gunpowder coming from the French) not to mention French navy blockades and such.

The best scenario would be that Washington lived a lot longer and became general after his presidency. And one day he calls Napoleon short which causes France to just lose it’s shit and invade America from Louisiana (France obviously sends troops across the Atlantic). America tries to conquer the Louisiana area and France tries to take DC. That would be awesome. America would have to get supplies from Britain which would like to mess up France. Yea it ignores the revolutionary army that Washington led in favor of a normal army but if he called Napoleon short during the revolution or right after then France would just cut off aid and curb stomp America. The fight would be so one sided that the Americans would surrender to France before the first bullet was fired.

But in a 1 on 1 Washington Vs Napoleon, that is just dumb. Next lets have FDR vs Mussolini. FDR would lose since he was in a wheel chair, but the USA would crush Italy since FDR was a much better politician and commander in chief than Mussolini.

Anonymous

Interesting alternate history. What if the impressment issue during John Adam’s presidency had occurred a few years earlier, during Washington’s presidency and had resulted in a war with France. Washington, as a war hero, personally leads the new Army of the United States in rearming to defend the homeland and conquer the Louisiana Territory (And why not? At this time, there was no precedent against US presidents being on the front line). Meanwhile, France sends one of its most promising young officers, and the victor of the Siege of Toulon, Napoleon Bonaparte, with an expeditionary force to the US, to defend France’s interests and teach the upstarts a lesson.

Not exactly a clash between the Grand Armee and the Colonial army, but a plausible historical scenario where the two might have met on the battlefield.

Zack Beagle

If you ever do decide to continue Deadliest Character please don’t step on the toes of DEATH BATTLE. Stomp on them. Stomp on them until the toes are broken and falling off. That show is fucking horrendous.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Rick-van-Hoof/100002579891733 Rick van Hoof

lol, vamps vs werewolves was the first thing that popped into my head. But ask this:
Vampires vs The knights who say niii

http://www.facebook.com/people/Rick-van-Hoof/100002579891733 Rick van Hoof

lol, vamps vs werewolves was the first thing that popped into my head. But ask this:
Vampires vs The knights who say niii

kevin cullen

Another i thought of Unicron VS Galactus

Anonymous

Princess Celestia vs Belldandy.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_5UBZV7BEAE2KQYMVRQRKD4CJ54 Dwrean

hello spoony! god im happy to see deadliest stuff come up. so -fun- to talk about it.

well, i THINK i know what they are trying to test here.
they are not testing the weapon itself, but how someone who is trained to use the weapon utilizes it.
they are testing the SOLDIER, not just the weapon.
otherwise jamie would macguyver his soda machine robot to lob spears.

to fix this, instead of one guy testing, have three. the top shot, the expert, and the noob.
top shot is a skilled marksman, perhaps not a master with said weapon, but has a record to accurately shoot weapons with proficiency.
the expert is who we have now.
and the noob is the guy who we at least can trust with basic gun safety rules.
that way we can see how the weapon handles between different soldiers of differing experience and what not, instead of one guy who may or may not be having an off day.

doctor dumb (you know who) could be worth so much more to the show. instead of saying who lives and who dies, save in those few RARE occasions, maybe give the audience a bit of a anatomy lesson, show more on HOW the guy dies, less on is he dead. back it up with a 3d cadaver which undergoes the death to be more visible to the audience.

just ideas on how the show could be improved, as if it matters here…

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_PU6ZQ5VOS5MDLFBEPVAHFBHFPQ NickE

Did anyone else see the new The Thing trailer? I’m surprised Spoony hasn’t been raging over it yet, because it is an absolute BETRAYAL!!!!! to the original The Thing!

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_KQZM4I3JX6F27LT4EM2Y27IFMU Corey

L block vs mario who is deadliest.

Logondo

I’ve always wanted you to go back to playing with the toys like you did in the Hell’s Kitchen review. Those were hilarious. If getting an animation ever fails, if you decide to bring back Deadliest character, I think doing another toy-show-thing would be very entertaining.
Anyways, enjoyed hearing form you, as always.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Michael-Wilbur/100000233713624 Michael Wilbur

Need the contest rely strictly on combat? How about a test of skill instead? I propose pitting two famous thieves and their teams against each other to steal a priceless object from a very secure location. Lupin III, Jigen, and Goemon versus Sly Cooper, Bentley, and Murray. This need not neglect each team’s combat skills, but the true test would be who could escape the building and the other team (not to mention each team’s lawful pursuers, Inspecter Zenigata and Carmelita Fox) with the artifact in tow.

Just a thought.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Michael-Wilbur/100000233713624 Michael Wilbur

Need the contest rely strictly on combat? How about a test of skill instead? I propose pitting two famous thieves and their teams against each other to steal a priceless object from a very secure location. Lupin III, Jigen, and Goemon versus Sly Cooper, Bentley, and Murray. This need not neglect each team’s combat skills, but the true test would be who could escape the building and the other team (not to mention each team’s lawful pursuers, Inspecter Zenigata and Carmelita Fox) with the artifact in tow.

Just a thought.

http://twitter.com/cpe380 Christian Ejercito

I still can’t tell if the “Vampires vs. ???” bit was sarcastic or not… I feel dumb.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_2EF7KGAXLRXJUGKASYZGK4Z5WI Jason

i actually looked it up…….. from what i can tell they really are going to do a zombie vs vampire…. thats sad
- http://www.facebook.com/people/Matthew-Foweraker/100000318540923 Matthew Foweraker
  
  So Zombies, vs Zombies with super powers? Yeah, that’s difficult.
Anonymous

It’s real. The sneak preview is the dumbest thing I’ve ever seen. That’s saying a lot seeing as we’re chatting on this here site…

http://www.facebook.com/people/Nhan-Nguyen/100000056138996 Nhan Nguyen

Real Vampires vs. Sparkly Vampires.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_2EF7KGAXLRXJUGKASYZGK4Z5WI Jason

I would have to say that i enjoyed the last episode of season 1. Not for the scientific tests but for the fun of watching a spartan and a samurai go at it. I still say the only reason i enjoyed this though is the fact that im a Marine and when you get a bunch of drunk Marines sitting around bull shitting this show is what you come up with.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Zachary-Duncan-Duncan/1060388364 Zachary Duncan Duncan

just so you know, “tu es merde” in french translate to “you are shit” guess you can say anything on public television if it is in a different language

Geoffrey Walter

Well, Spike is a cable network. They don’t have to follow FCC regulations. Only open-air broadcasts have to listen to the FCC. TECHNICALLY there’s nothing stopping cable television stations from showing whatever they want, other than the opinions of their viewership. Remember, South Park once had an episode where they had a counter of how many times they said the word “Shit” in that episode.

I remember back in the 90s, USA network used to show softcore porn late at night. Not illegal, just a bad PR move.
Geoffrey Walter

Well, Spike is a cable network. They don’t have to follow FCC regulations. Only open-air broadcasts have to listen to the FCC. TECHNICALLY there’s nothing stopping cable television stations from showing whatever they want, other than the opinions of their viewership. Remember, South Park once had an episode where they had a counter of how many times they said the word “Shit” in that episode.

I remember back in the 90s, USA network used to show softcore porn late at night. Not illegal, just a bad PR move.

the_horror_freak

Lol was screaming ´´Werewolf´´ at the tv when spoony were trying to come up with an enemy for vampires
/slap :P

http://twitter.com/86TheJehuty M.A Ajab

lol , I thought I’m the only one who was screaming “Werewolf ! Werewolf ! WEREWOLVES , GODDAMN IT !!” >8O
Anonymous

Me too. xD I was just waiting for him to get it. Or actually, at one point I was almost sure he was playing with us which made me lol even more when he finally got it.

http://twitter.com/sturmovikdragon Mike b

Dude, forget about animating Dalek vs Borg, go live action!! Both those fandoms have people with top quality Borg and Dalek costumes and I am sure your fanbase could locate such people who would be interested in participating in a Deadliest Character fight.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Daniel-Seminara/827845376 Daniel Seminara

Vampires vs. Highlander Immortals

sk37ch22

This is Spike. I’ve never had any expectations from Spike to begin with. This is what happens when Spike attempts informative or educational television. Thousand ways to die, mansers, deadliest warrior, it’s all ridiculous.

http://twitter.com/Kanta_Mizuno Ryan Alarie

I think there needs to be a Least Deadliest Character spin off, Storm Troopers Vs. Cobra, Skeletor’s Minions vs. Planateer Villains, etc

http://www.facebook.com/people/Mitch-Sea-Cow-Cooper/1324130622 Mitch Sea Cow Cooper

whoa whoa whoa, the theoretical next deadliest character is dalkes vs. borg?… dude… if your going to do borg vs something from doctor who then go cybermen! they may not be the most iconic Dr who villain race but they are the total parallel!… plus the total upset when 3 daleks warp in from no where that end up destroying EVERYONE in a heartbeat would be awesome and piss soooooo many people off!

http://twitter.com/Jegsimmons James Simmons

you know alot of the footage from the actual test are faked right?

just take a close look at the rifle covered in mud challenge on the IRA vs Spetsnaz episode.

Anonymous

IRA vs. Taliban, but yeah.
Anonymous

IRA vs. Taliban, but yeah.

http://twitter.com/Jegsimmons James Simmons

you know alot of the footage from the actual test are faked right?

just take a close look at the rifle covered in mud challenge on the IRA vs Spetsnaz episode.

Anonymous

You know, I think your idea for how you would do this show would actually be very interesting. Without the Haiti Revolution in 1791, Napoleon would have been able to expand France’s holdings in what later became the Louisiana Purchase. So that would be the more likely scenario for a Napoleonic France vs. Colonial America war. A speculative fiction documentary concerning that situation might have some promise. Good review and analysis.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Sebastian-Hjelm/100001460655037 Sebastian Hjelm

vAMPIREs Versus GHOSTBUSTERS spoony!
“Yes it’s true… This man has no dick.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Sebastian-Hjelm/100001460655037 Sebastian Hjelm

vAMPIREs Versus GHOSTBUSTERS spoony!
“Yes it’s true… This man has no dick.

Anonymous

You know a lot more about history and science than most Americans, fo sho. Hence why you’re able to bitch about this show while everyone else who watches it just wants to see blood spraying out of dummies.
By the way: while he was born in Corsica, Napoleon was actually of Italian ancestry. Hence the name Buonaparte (or Bonaparte, the French spelling). So when you say, “Well, he was French,” you’re not quite right!
But everybody always has to pick on the French.

Anyway, I loved Deadliest Character #1. I’d like to see more. If you’ve got animators willing to put in the work, shit, go for it man.

http://profiles.yahoo.com/u/PG5F4OSEWLGOVPEHK44ZWDRI4Y Sean

Death Battle is still going on Spoony. I reccomend a few episodes for
fun. Like Shadow vs Vegeta with voice work done by the guys over at Team
Fourstar. The latest one they just came out with was Rebecca Black vs
Justin Bieber. Also another one you might be intreasted in is Felica
from the Dark Stalker Series vs Taokaka from Blaz Blue. My personal
favorite though right after the Vegeta Shadow one though is the
Bomberman vs Dig Dug.

As to which is better… does it really matter? I think both are quite
fun and awesome. I just get a better high quality vibe from the Deadlist
Character Ep 1 because like you said. That animation was awesome!

Ryan Murphy

I agree with you, Spoony. This simulation was not well shot, and the X-Factors were bull. At least the X-Factors made sense. I have to wonder though, what kind of X-Factors are they going to use for the last episode of this season, where they are pitting Zombies against Vampires.

I AM NOT EVEN JOKING! They are just going completely off the reservation. The best part is, since their are no real historians for these two beasts, they are having Steve Niles, the guy who wrote 30 Days of Night, for the Vampires, and Max Brooks, the writer of the Zombie Survival Guide and World War Z, for the Zombies. I only hopethat the Simulation is better shot, because i already know that the fight would be fraking awesome to see.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Michael-Wells/519519675 Michael Wells

Seriously Max Brooks… well I guess I will be watching that for Max Brooks is god!

Ryan Murphy

I agree with you, Spoony. This simulation was not well shot, and the X-Factors were bull. At least the X-Factors made sense. I have to wonder though, what kind of X-Factors are they going to use for the last episode of this season, where they are pitting Zombies against Vampires.

I AM NOT EVEN JOKING! They are just going completely off the reservation. The best part is, since their are no real historians for these two beasts, they are having Steve Niles, the guy who wrote 30 Days of Night, for the Vampires, and Max Brooks, the writer of the Zombie Survival Guide and World War Z, for the Zombies. I only hopethat the Simulation is better shot, because i already know that the fight would be fraking awesome to see.

http://countzeroor.wordpress.com Alexander Case

As a minor little aside about Napoleon, you pretty much had it right about the Russian invasion – except one minor thing. Napoleon invaded in late Fall, not Winter. It sounds minor, but it made all the difference in his invasion. Not meaning to nitpick or nothing, just if anyone’s interested:

Napoleon made it all the way to Moscow before winter started, and basically spent most of the winter there. The problem is, the Russian scorched earth policy meant that his army had no forage. At the time, it depended on forage – there were actually a couple battles that Napoleon nearly lost in, either Spain or Italy because he couldn’t field all his forces, due to all the foraging parties. That’s the problem with such big armies – the more men you have the more food your foraging parties have to collect, which means the larger your foraging parties are. James Burke actually talks about this in a season one episode of Connections (which is online available for legal streaming - http://www.youtube.com/user/JamesBurkeWeb)

Anyway. Napoleon got to Moscow very quickly (as the Russians weren’t even bothering to fight him, just destroying their crops and withdrawing), and then winter hit and he was stuck. He couldn’t advance because it was too cold. His men were literally freezing to death because they were in their summer uniforms. They were starving because there was no food to forage. Finally, he couldn’t retreat for the same reason he couldn’t advance. Finally, after a point, he made a break for it, and lost even more men on the withdraw, due to frostbite and disease.

The Nazi’s in WWII thought they learned from this and thought: “Oh, since we’re a modern army that doesn’t forage, we’ll be bringing our own food. Also, if we bring winter gear, we should be fine against the Russians.” In other words, they essentially expected the Russians to generally fight the way they had four wars earlier (Russian War of Revolution, Crimean War, World War I, and the Napoleonic Wars make 4), or at least not to have adapted their tactics to the kind of nasty, cut-throat-literally tactics that the Russians would employ throughout the Eastern Front.

http://twitter.com/JJJMMM1 JM

Almost, but not quite true. It wasn’t late fall. The invasion started in June and the retreat started in October. The Russian main army did fight Napoleon in Borodino (which was a big battle) but even though the French won, they failed to chase down and destroy the army. Russians retreated and the war continued.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Matt-Loudon/100000983582044 Matt Loudon

If you want a bullshit battle Deadliest Warrior style fight between combatants who don’t even belong in the same category other than the title “Spartan” then I got just the Deadliest Character fight for ya Spoony; KRATOS, the spartan warrior turned god of war who took down gods, titans, and mortals in a mighty quest of vengeance that brought the ancient world to it’s end…..MASTER CHIEF, genetically bred one man army, last hope of the galaxy and Covenant killer extraordinaire. It’s the brutal ancient power of chaos, vs the hi-tech of the weaponry of the galaxy has to offer…WHO IS DEADLIEST?

http://www.facebook.com/people/Matt-Loudon/100000983582044 Matt Loudon

If you want a bullshit battle Deadliest Warrior style fight between combatants who don’t even belong in the same category other than the title “Spartan” then I got just the Deadliest Character fight for ya Spoony; KRATOS, the spartan warrior turned god of war who took down gods, titans, and mortals in a mighty quest of vengeance that brought the ancient world to it’s end…..MASTER CHIEF, genetically bred one man army, last hope of the galaxy and Covenant killer extraordinaire. It’s the brutal ancient power of chaos, vs the hi-tech of the weaponry of the galaxy has to offer…WHO IS DEADLIEST?

http://www.facebook.com/people/Matt-Loudon/100000983582044 Matt Loudon

If you want a bullshit battle Deadliest Warrior style fight between combatants who don’t even belong in the same category other than the title “Spartan” then I got just the Deadliest Character fight for ya Spoony; KRATOS, the spartan warrior turned god of war who took down gods, titans, and mortals in a mighty quest of vengeance that brought the ancient world to it’s end…..MASTER CHIEF, genetically bred one man army, last hope of the galaxy and Covenant killer extraordinaire. It’s the brutal ancient power of chaos, vs the hi-tech of the weaponry of the galaxy has to offer…WHO IS DEADLIEST?

Dom DeLorenzo

I wanna See a Deadliest Warrior Legends review. I heard it was even worse than the first game. It actually looks better to me though

Dom DeLorenzo

I wanna See a Deadliest Warrior Legends review. I heard it was even worse than the first game. It actually looks better to me though

http://www.youtube.com/egxtra John K. Spencer

Vampires VS Zombies?! How the HELL are they going to determine the winner with THAT?!

My random knowledge in vampiric lore might be a bit rusty, but I doubt drinking the blood of the UNDEAD will benefit the vampires in any way, not to mention that vampires could simply allow the zombies to die off on their own (they ARE technically immortal, whereas zombies will eventually decay into nothingness). This isn’t exactly a battle that can be easily determined with the usual 5-on-5 group deathmatch, nor is it one that makes sense. That last sentence probably didn’t make any sense, especially since we’re talking about Deadliest Warrior here, but allow me to elaborate:

Characters from across time and space are pitted against each other in mortal combat. Regardless of the era, both sides are motivated by one thing: survival. They see opposition and a threat to their existence, and they must confront and defeat it if they wish to see another day. In the case of Vampires VS Zombies, it’s a one-sided affair, at best: zombies are mindless drones drawn by the living. They are motivated by nothing. Vampires, however, might be motivated to contain the zombie plague if it leads to a decline in their human blood supply…

Is that how we’ll be able to decide this battle? With a 24-hour human feast between Vampires and Zombies? Zombies already win in that regard; the zombie plague has a variety of ways to spread with less than a day for the virus to take effect, while vampiric infections are much more contained and take weeks before an infected is transformed. Also, unlike their flesh-eating counterparts, there are ways to reverse vampirism. Reversing zombification? Technically, yes, as you’ll return a zombie to their original state: as a dead, unmoving corpse.

I mentioned earlier that, to my knowledge, vampires drinking “dead blood” won’t benefit them in any way, so what do zombies get for eating a vampire? Surely, their zombie senses won’t draw them to the “children of the night”, though in the likely chance that they decide to feed on one, what then? Will they chow down on the vampire until there’s nothing left or does the vampire become a vampire-zombie hybrid? That alone would open a completely new can of worms!

Anonymous

It’d still depend on which vampire and which zombie is being compared. Hellsing? Alucard goes gun akimbo guns that make the Desert Eagle look like a wimp (forgot what caliber it is though), and gets butchered up in fights on purpose so he could enjoy the fight. Tsukihime has a character made of 666 beasts, and can’t die unless all of them are killed at once, plus a bunch of minor characters who are implied to be stronger, who can use magic that breaks reality (I actually never playing through the my first route, so I don’t know more).

http://www.facebook.com/people/David-Laus/100000158877077 David Laus

The only episode I actually liked was Mafia vs. Yakuza.

brandon montgomery

If i were you spoony, i woudlnt worry too much about the sound problems… until you wrote that, i didnt even hear any poping or anything. And this is my third time watching it… (well, listen….i listen while playing minecraft XD)

anywho, dont work too hard and cant wait to see you in canada

Anonymous

Also, if you’re taking suggestions for Deadliest Character, I nominate Daleks vs. Space Marines.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Matt-Danza/615842885 Matt Danza

do the deadliest warrior, squall vs tidus.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Matt-Danza/615842885 Matt Danza

do the deadliest warrior, squall vs tidus.

Anonymous

Which mumbling twat punktard would win in a fight. I’m going to say Squall due to the fact that Squall knows how to use a weapon. Tidus didn’t know how to swing a sword around when Auron handed one to him.
- http://www.facebook.com/people/Joey-Withrow/1438811830 Joey Withrow
  
  Actually Tidus would win because Squall would be to busy trying to draw magic from Tidus.

http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

Have you SEEN these Arby’s commercials? I know they aren’t part of the Vlog, but GOD DAMMIT.

For some reason, Arby’s has decided that the best man to represent their fast food chain is a mugging, over-caffeinated douchebag with a voice like a slide whistle. Until I saw that commercial, I never enven knew that acting is as easy as sticking out your chin and grimacing like a maniac.

He can’t sing either, he can’t manage to raise his voice high enough to say ‘it’s good mood food’, so they just had the autotone take care of it. I mean, it’s not like you’ll recognize the obvious, synthetic leaps in his voice.

Because Arby’s thinks your stupid.

http://twitter.com/SolidGoldCEO SolidGoldCEO

Why would they even bother with this. Even if they came to the conclusion with the most accurate of information no US TV show would have the guts to have George Washington lose

Anonymous

MLP: FiM’s Mane Cast vs. The Autobots from Transformers Prime vs. GI Joe!

Anonymous

MLP: FiM’s Mane Cast vs. The Autobots from Transformers Prime vs. GI Joe!

http://www.facebook.com/people/Andrew-Ciccaroni/72002282 Andrew Ciccaroni

The issue with the musket fire for the show, too, is the fact that muskets were NOT the main weapon used to kill by foot soldiers in the American Revolution. The point of muskets back then was to provide cover fire, so they could go in and use their bayonets. These people are not historians, and usually don’t seem to study how the weapons were implemented and they ignore a good amount of the actual implications of weapons. You mentioned it yourself, the canons being more mobile for one side is major in an actual war or battle, no effect when you assume that they never move it.

SignNinja

I got 2 things for you, ScrewAttack and DeathBattle. They did it real well for sprites and stuff, just do that or at least get to be a part of it. Hell if TeamFourStar can do it, you can as well!

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1045530038 Jeremy Brooks

Jurassic Fight Club only goes on for 12 episode, yet this thing still goes on for more than 23 episodes… -_-

Anonymous

Of course if this show had an ounce of scientific fact or common sense (5-on-5, seriously?), Napoleon would have won easily. Straight-up – the guy took on European coalitions while Washington had to depend on the French to even “win.” Regarding Washington’s true tactics with a lesser army you can debate whether or not he could have used mobility long enough to hold off the French legions. It makes the two hard enough to compare. Only an idiot would have them fighting hand-to-hand, which is unfortunately the lowest common denominator to which this show often tries to appeal… the Meatheads cooing at falling pig carcasses. Why would they spend the whole show building up to a legitimate comparison and then give us a 5-on-5 brawl? And do they really think cannons would come into play in a freaking 5-on-5 brawl?

Of course, we all know they dare not let Washington lose… like good simple-minded patriots appealing viscerally to the masses.

http://countzeroor.wordpress.com Alexander Case

Well, depends on your criteria. If you did a one battle straight fight, Napoleon would definitely win. If you set it up as a campaign, Washington would have a chance, as instead of hitting Napoleon’s forces head on, he’d more likely harass his foragers and his supply train. Attacking the foragers (in addition to causing logistical headaches for Napoleon’s men), helps build further support among the populace for Washington, and raiding their baggage train and destroying whatever supplies they couldn’t bring with them limits Napoleon’s ability to fight.

That said, to get a final victory, as you say, Washington would need help to make sure that Napoleon couldn’t get re-supplied, either from the Spanish or from (ironically), the English.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1298206711 Juan Pedro Patino

One thing that bugs me a lot about this show that doesn’t bug most people (mostly because I’m a math nerd) is that they just don’t bother to run tests of statistical significance after they get the results. I’ve done it at home and realized that a lot of the “winners” simply got more victories based on luck/natural variation which means the thing was basically a coin flip.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1298206711 Juan Pedro Patino

One thing that bugs me a lot about this show that doesn’t bug most people (mostly because I’m a math nerd) is that they just don’t bother to run tests of statistical significance after they get the results. I’ve done it at home and realized that a lot of the “winners” simply got more victories based on luck/natural variation which means the thing was basically a coin flip.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Andy-Jessop/1666993022 Andy Jessop

I would of gone for Vampires vs gorgons

http://www.facebook.com/people/Andy-Jessop/1666993022 Andy Jessop

I would of gone for Vampires vs gorgons

Anonymous

Best testimony of Napoleon ruthlessness was battle of Somosierra, when he send polish cavalry to certain death:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Somosierra#The_Polish_charge

Vampieres vs. Elfes – Dracula vs. Legolas. ;)
More deadliest character! Na’vi vs. Ewoks ;)

http://www.facebook.com/people/Miguel-Gutierrez/1189815515 Miguel Gutierrez

So did you every play Total War: Shogun 2?

& If you did- did you like it?

http://twitter.com/darkamdusias Abilash Pulicken

This was pretty excellent. Well done!

http://www.facebook.com/people/Mark-Redding/100001210219556 Mark Redding

Just a heads up about the weapons analogy, the m16/ar15 platform is quite possibly one of the easiest weapons to shoot ever made. It has a recoil spring that goes all the way down the stock and it’s recoil is very linear. On the other hand, the 9mm is a lot harder to keep on target between shots because you don’t have the advantage of the stock and fore-grip. It really takes a lot more practice to get good with a pistol than it does with a rifle.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_H24G7OXSNJTI7CGZIRUJBJFH3Q TekJansen

Loved the first Deadliest Character and how it showed how the show it’s mocking is such bull crap, but I do have a suggestion on the Deadliest Character #2. Go the complete opposite and do all the things you say you’d do if you ran Deadliest Warrior, the round table stuff, ect. Then leave the battle in the air or do a fan vote, and possibly do the results with you playing with dolls xP

Borg v. Daleks ends with big daddy winning!

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_H24G7OXSNJTI7CGZIRUJBJFH3Q TekJansen

Loved the first Deadliest Character and how it showed how the show it’s mocking is such bull crap, but I do have a suggestion on the Deadliest Character #2. Go the complete opposite and do all the things you say you’d do if you ran Deadliest Warrior, the round table stuff, ect. Then leave the battle in the air or do a fan vote, and possibly do the results with you playing with dolls xP

Borg v. Daleks ends with big daddy winning!

http://www.facebook.com/people/Ibrahim-Zallum/1587587054 Ibrahim Zallum

Just a clarification about bronze-in reference to the legend you mentioned:

Bronze was used early on, in preference to iron, ever since cannons were first made (an early Chinese hand cannon, and the guns that pounded Constantinople in 1453, are two examples-look up cannon in Wikipedia for pictures). the reasons had little to do with the mobility, scarcity of iron, or shortages in the US. instead, it was more a function of the limitation of iron working up to the mid-eighteenth century. added to that, it is indeed lighter, and it is more durable, though for the former this was not put to good advantage until the mid-to late eighteenth century-for the most part. the reason being that cannon founders tended to embellish the cannons with all sorts of unnecessary decor (just look up the Valliere system), carriage making techniques were comparatively primitive (carriages in the 17th and early eighteenth centuries are absolute monsters). added to that, limitations in bronze making, and engineering related to explosives, meant barrel walls were also very thick, ill bored, and often unnecessarily long (so the barrel was heavier, and less accurate). overtime, as barrel production was simplified and streamlined, and carriages became lighter and sturdier, then we start to see true mobility-even horse artillery, by the 1750′s. the exception were with 3 and 1 pdr cannons, which were often produced in sufficiently small size to be manhandled by infantrymen. That of course warrants a whole book. worth noting, is that French guns were mostly Bronze, not iron, throughout their history till the mid 19th century.

this mind you, does not detract from your point about mobility: it only reinforces it. and they should have noted that in comparing cannons. they should have also noted the difference in tactical use of artillery: cannons in the 18th century were not used in the way Napoleon used them.

As to massed cavalry charges (you bring it up late in the video)? they were actually pretty common in the 18th century (Minden (1759), Fontenoy (1745), Rossbach (1757), Blenheim (1704), Ramilles (1706), Warburg (1760), and Emsdorf (1760); most listed involved British Cavalry (since it was doctrinally possible for 1770′s Britain, and America). these charges were almost non-existent in America (Waxhaws aside) due to the difficulty of moving cavalry (or the horses only) across the Atlantic from the UK, or getting them from the colonies proper. The French innovated in the sense of scale and organization.

and the DW people really fucked up Napoleon: Napoleon actually invaded in the Summer, not the Winter: he got caught by the winter heading back from Moscow. his mistake was to stay in Moscow for 6 weeks (IIRC the length of stay).

beyond that: you’re actually doing okay-for a layman.

PS: the battle Napoleon fought was Austerlitz-2nd December, 1805. and “Merde” means “Shit” in French.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_QBQ4I277KTRY3KEVM3ZHM22U6M Rob

I would go for Jedi vs Vampires, you know like 5 Windu level Jedis going against 5 Blade level Vampires (I would say Alucard level but can you actually see anyone standing a snowballs chance in hell of beating them?)

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_F6DCTUY6RUMWXJKGOICRNIAXCM André Norell

Make them eat Schrödingers cat? ;)
http://pulse.yahoo.com/_F6DCTUY6RUMWXJKGOICRNIAXCM André Norell

Make them eat Schrödingers cat? ;)

http://www.facebook.com/people/Zeb-Perkins/100000334808720 Zeb Perkins

Hey Spoony, our forum has an entire subforum dedicated to “vs debates”, similar to your description of Deadliest Character. I recently started a tournament (done in the Suvudu fictional character tournament style) featuring a pretty diverse range of fictional characters. If the idea interests you, maybe you should check it out.

This is a link to the overall tournament thread:
http://forums.spacebattles.com/showthread.php?t=194596

And this is the current round, Captain America vs. Tanya from Red Alert 2.
http://forums.spacebattles.com/showthread.php?t=196518

The next round will be Solid Snake vs. Darth Vader. Feel free to take a look or participate!

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_F6DCTUY6RUMWXJKGOICRNIAXCM André Norell

Stallone VS Schwarzenegger!

Warcraft VS Tolkien!

Stormtroopers VS Vogons!

Anonymous

I love how that implies that Stallone and Schwarzenegger are fictional characters. :’D
- http://www.facebook.com/people/Michael-Wells/519519675 Michael Wells
  
  No it does not, since the show actually does people people and are only now doing fantasy things, so thats the more natural one.
- http://www.facebook.com/people/Michael-Wells/519519675 Michael Wells
  
  No it does not, since the show actually does people people and are only now doing fantasy things, so thats the more natural one.
  - Anonymous
    
    I think he just meant how both of the other examples he gave were fictional.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_F6DCTUY6RUMWXJKGOICRNIAXCM André Norell

Stallone VS Schwarzenegger!

Warcraft VS Tolkien!

Stormtroopers VS Vogons!

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1798310608 Jan Pospíšil

The fencing actually wasn’t horrible, someone clearly showed them at least a couple of forms, but it was shot really badly. (too many face close-ups, as you said)

Anonymous

Jiang shi? (Okay, obviously. How many Asian hopping corpse vampires can there be.)

Hm… actually that would be a pretty interesting match. Hard to say which one would win; I’d instinctively think western vampires but that depends on which legends we’re going with. And whether or not vampires have any qi that the jiang shi could suck out of them.

Although the real deciding factor might just be whether or not they know each others’ weaknesses…

Anonymous

If Jackie Chan Adventures is anything to go by, it requires some really random and ridiculous way to drain the Jiang Shi of its powers, and then kill it (I think it was stealing one of its socks and stuffing it with toad stool or something, it was years ago when I saw that cartoon).

http://www.facebook.com/brynjarbjornsson Brynjar Björnsson

Very good vlog, I actually haven’t seen Deadliest Warrior and most of its content has been relayed to me by your recounts, but I have a feeling it can’t hold a candle to those exact recounts. In terms of your handling of the historical facts.. well the show can’t really hold a candle there either. I mean, this show seems to be more down to preference than any sort of historical/scientific accuracy at all. I mean… if a band of Napoleon + 5 were to meet Washington + 5… or if – as you mentioned – goddamn Vlad the Impaler vs Sun Tzu… it’s just like one of those silly games elementary school kids would make up to keep each other/themselves entertained: “If the Alien or the Predator would meet in an alley, which one would win?!” It’s really as silly as that!

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_Q4JJMULUGCW6WL3ECUNEYHDBJQ Vash The Stampede

Adam Sandler vs Rob Schneider

http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

Have you heard that new TGI Fridays commercial for beer flavored foods?

I have never heard a woman gets so excited about flounder. She sounds like she’s on the verge of an orgasm.

James Krayenhagen

This show is really like 5 shows in one; you have the weapon demonstrations, the pseudo-science where people are talking, the competition between the two teams complete with trash talking, the “simulated” battle at the end, and the voiced over narration. Then you could debate whether it is weapon vs weapon or operator vs operator or if the show is trying to have it’s cake and eat it too. Doesn’t matter the cake is a lie anyways. It is a show on spike, important thing that, for the meathead/jock to be entertained and have some semblance of intellectual stimulation. My personal faverite part of the show is the demonstrations when they explain why a weapon does the type of damage it does the theory behind the weapons construction and the way it was yielded. The show’s appeal for me, and I imagine for a lot of people, is it is an interesting concept that is butchered as far as any seeable science is concerned that it is like watching a train wreck through your own brain. I actually enjoy the aftermath discussions more than the show itself.

James Krayenhagen

This show is really like 5 shows in one; you have the weapon demonstrations, the pseudo-science where people are talking, the competition between the two teams complete with trash talking, the “simulated” battle at the end, and the voiced over narration. Then you could debate whether it is weapon vs weapon or operator vs operator or if the show is trying to have it’s cake and eat it too. Doesn’t matter the cake is a lie anyways. It is a show on spike, important thing that, for the meathead/jock to be entertained and have some semblance of intellectual stimulation. My personal faverite part of the show is the demonstrations when they explain why a weapon does the type of damage it does the theory behind the weapons construction and the way it was yielded. The show’s appeal for me, and I imagine for a lot of people, is it is an interesting concept that is butchered as far as any seeable science is concerned that it is like watching a train wreck through your own brain. I actually enjoy the aftermath discussions more than the show itself.

colintregan

For another look at just how ridiculous the deadliest warrior is take a gander at charlie brookers take on it:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u9aq0tnwEoM&feature=channel_video_title#t=8m

saw it a while ago and spoonys rant reminded me of it.

colintregan

For another look at just how ridiculous the deadliest warrior is take a gander at charlie brookers take on it:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u9aq0tnwEoM&feature=channel_video_title#t=8m

saw it a while ago and spoonys rant reminded me of it.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_6LQ3Z7SESYRERPTOOMEX2RW5AE Ward

Hey Spoony,

If you want to see Vampires VS. Werewolves, just check The Real Ghostbuster’s episode “No One Comes to Lupusville”.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000798071024 Atztex Idontthinkso

hey spoony – i think this blobbing sound might be the limiter on your camera input (or the mic – but i guess your using an external microphone). so basically the limiter is working all the time and compressing the peaks in such a hard way that it sounds like this popping. i might be wrong tho. try to lower your input level or change the power the limiter is working with.

now to this episode: im not too sure what to say. you seemed soo disappointed by this pseudo-science – so much that i just wanted to tell you not to take it too serious. but then you said “its a rediculous premise in the first place” and yes. thats what it is. i mean come on – its SO BIASED its fucking obvious! :D did you really think that NAPOLEON would have a fucking chance against one of the greatest figures of the american history… made by an american tv show?? :D PLEASE!! i would LOVE to see napoleon win just because he WAS the greater warrior but still. noone would ever watch this show again if anyone ever saw napoleon kick washingtons ass :D so what did you expect?

still a great hour of bitching – its all always fun. and con bravo? … really? why dont you come to germany for once? :D
cya

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000798071024 Atztex Idontthinkso

hey spoony – i think this blobbing sound might be the limiter on your camera input (or the mic – but i guess your using an external microphone). so basically the limiter is working all the time and compressing the peaks in such a hard way that it sounds like this popping. i might be wrong tho. try to lower your input level or change the power the limiter is working with.

now to this episode: im not too sure what to say. you seemed soo disappointed by this pseudo-science – so much that i just wanted to tell you not to take it too serious. but then you said “its a rediculous premise in the first place” and yes. thats what it is. i mean come on – its SO BIASED its fucking obvious! :D did you really think that NAPOLEON would have a fucking chance against one of the greatest figures of the american history… made by an american tv show?? :D PLEASE!! i would LOVE to see napoleon win just because he WAS the greater warrior but still. noone would ever watch this show again if anyone ever saw napoleon kick washingtons ass :D so what did you expect?

still a great hour of bitching – its all always fun. and con bravo? … really? why dont you come to germany for once? :D
cya

http://kensan-oni.livejournal.com/ Kensan_Oni

Vampires vs. Deep Ones!

http://twitter.com/random_ninja5 Eric Hesselberg

I do love listening to you bitch about Deadliest Warrior. It’s one of those shows that you need to turn your brain off to enjoy fully…unfortunately, I can’t do that, and wind up face palming every other minute. I haven’t seen the Washington v. Bonaparte fight, but from what you’ve said, they dropped the ball on this. First off I’m speaking as a Historical Re-enactor who does enjoy bringing history to life for people who are unawares. This match up is both plausible and implausible at the same time. Unlike their other match ups between actual historical figures, Washington and Bonaparte were alive and fighting at the same time–although, as Spoony pointed out, the US and France were allies at the time and wouldn’t really be fighting. This is true for the American Revolution and the Napoleonic Wars in Europe. Many people tend to forget this, but Napoleon is the one who sold us the Louisiana Territory giving us more than half of our modern country. And while he was fighting the world over in Europe, we were fighting the British over here when they tried to take the country back. Great Britain was also one of the major forces against Napoleon. So we didn’t really have any interest in fighting France at the time. As for the weapons, I do have experience loading and firing both Napoleonic Era and American Revolution Era muskets–in fact they are the same. Apart from a few things, the guns didn’t change at all from the mid 1700s to the mid 1800s. Accuracy was around 50 yards, and the tactics were to line up troops and sling hot lead down range in the general direction of the enemy. Rifles were around, adding to the accuracy; however, they took longer to load–which is a factor that the “geniuses” at Deadliest Warrior probably forget to take into account. For those who don’t know the difference: Rifles have grooves inside the barrel which spins the bullet giving it more accuracy over distance; whereas muskets are smooth, and the bullets just rattle along inside the barrel as you fire. You may hit the guy you’re pointing at, you may hit the guy next to him, or miss altogether–That’s the way the ball bounces. And yes, that is where that phrase comes from.
While this match up is interesting, it’s just stupid. Neither of these men would actually fight each other. Barring the allies thing, these men were generals, commanders-in-chief, and typically did not hang around the front lines. I could go on demonstrating my superior knowledge over the Deadliest Warrior crew, but I shant. Great video, Spoony. If they do have Vampires v Zombies, I hope you will Vlog about it as well. Plus, I wanna see Radioactive Spiders v Molemen. That would be grand. Or maybe Ash v Simon Belmont–if they insist on hero v hero.
As for the Deadliest Character, I loved it. I actually watched it over and over when it was posted. I wish I could toss my hat into the ring for animator, but I’m not as good as I would hope I can be. I wish I could also toss my hat for editing. I have been editing videos for years and have my own web series; however, I have more technical problems than a line at the Geek Squad. One thing I am adept at is illustration. I’ve done a few things in the forums here and have my own DeviantArt page which is in dire need of updating with my work. You are welcome to check it out at http://randomninja-5.deviantart.com/ or my blog which features my videos and other entries at http://random-ninja-attack.blogspot.com/ if you see anything you like or may be interested in message me or leave a comment on either page–keep in mind that I am still trying to add more to both, but tech difficulties are making it well…difficult. Probably my most extensive video game knowledge would be on the MGS
games, if anything that would be useful for comes up feel free to
contact me as well.
As for Borg v Daleks…its a tough call on who I’d pick. I’m a big fan of both and their weapons and defenses are similar, you could chock it up to sheer numbers or have an “X” factor of either the Doctor or the Enterprise showing up to ruin everything. Love the videos, Spoony. I’m a big fan who’s also trying to make it on the internet like you.

Anonymous

This brings up the first thing that came to mind when I was viewing it: what is the situation? Look, Napoleon was an Emperor. Part of his goal, his tactic, was numbers. Where is the 4 on 4 coming from? If you do that you have to take out Washington’s gorilla warfare and what do you have left? Not Washington and Napoleon fighting. Was this just for the sim? Yes? Bull. Was Napoleon pre-occupied in Europe? Okay. Fine. So he got on a fuckin horse and swam across the Atlantic to fight Washington. Fine. Fine, fine fine. Good job Washington, you just lost America to Britain in the meantime.That’s the only way I can see this sim making anysense without pretty much saying, “Give 5 jackasses weapons from an era and have them shoot at 5 other jackasses.” I keep wanting to defend it by telling myself “it’s just for the sim,” but that jsut adds more variabals.You need to take them both in their prime (before freezing to death) and have Napoleon invade America without any interuptions. Okay, that’s part of being an Emperor—good point–Napoleon doesn’t even go himself then. Even if Washington wins the battles (Napoleon would sure as fuck send over more than enoguh men to give him a run for his money) Washington loses the war through Britain winning their’s. Being the bastard Nopeoleon was, he may have even made an agreement with Britain, then beyrayed them…bah, this is just stupid. Bottom line: AT LEAST PAINT A SITUATION FOR US.Now, this also brings up a major problem I had with Joan of Arc and William. Is this like, a battle after statistics of back and forth where the decided given the strength and stuff it would end up with William on the defending side? Okay, given the tech, I can somewhat beleive that… …But I want to ponit one thing out and I don’t really know if it matters, but the cannons and caterpaults. With a pretty close outcome can’t you assume that any minute change could chance it all? Did they even take into consideration that unless you have the high ground you can’t reliable use cannon fire while on the front lines? You don’t just plant men out their and have them fire a cannon…bows and arrows were around…people could come out and fight, and William sure as hell had the resources and was not afraid to give up men. Which brings me to my point.Catapults can be used on the front line and while you’re being sieged, as they can go over things. Before the castle wall goes down, Joan is already loseing men. They NEVER even mentioned William defending for so, how are we, the viewer, suppose to make any connection to that combat situation? Alright, so now the wall is crumbling. William isn’t a moron. It was shown he knew how to adapt. He’d be firing catapaults over the wall while sweeping men around to try and circle. Am I suppose to believe that these are the 4 assholes left after all the carniage? HOW DID IT GET TO THAT POINT?! The whole show should be them explaining how each side would win, then halfway through the show, they pick the winner and explain how it got there.Now I have a real problem with all of this because when you’re pitting armies together a big part of it is what? History. If you’re rewriting history like this, really go and do it. Have the cast be like…gods or soemthing, who set up situations for this situation to happen. With armies—expecially considering leadership—you NEED to account for everything or it makes no sense. If you’re not going to go above and beyond with it all, not just the people you hire, stick to 1 vs 1 warriors of the past or squads of today. At least with 1v1 there is enough disbeleif and common sense to back it. Far fewer variables. Batman vs Superman. Logic. Batman wins in every case unless Superman isntnatly goes batshit evil and punches his head off. This will never happen by DC logic because Superman’s will is too strong for an instant conversion, but theoreticly, if some uber badass brainwashed him in a second and was unknown to Batman (be it galaxies away) so Batman would win by DC logic. Get over it. Batman would go so far as to count the nubmer of butterflies passing him today, think, “Superman is going to go evil today” and build a device to propell the Earth into a krypton reserve somewhere in space. He’d do it if he had to.

…And with modern day, we have the facts and we’ve seen some proof and they do work in squads today because it’s more practical. Less deaths and you can get plases an army can’t.The US would nuke someone if they had to. It’s happened.That’s the shit they need to do.Oh, by the way, top Samurai didn’t use armor in a non-war situation. It slowed them down.The lords let those one play first. It was honor. The Ninja WOULD kill the Spartan in the sleep. That’s one of their tools. How the Ninja got into Sparta? I don’t know, it’s their job to tell me. If he couldn’t they simply wouldn’t fight. Spartan warriors walknig around ambushed by ninjas? Yeah right.Oh, and if a knight got a horse, why doesn’t the pirate have a ship? What is your deffenition of “fair” and “pirate” Deadliest Warrior? Is a pirate just a dude from the 1700′s that has a fancy hat, smells bad, and has a gun? Why didn’t the pirate shoot the fuckin CHARGING HORSE, then when it died or reared and flung the knight off, USE THE GRENEADE WHEN HE COULDN’T POSSIBLY TAKE ANY ELSS THAN THE FULL FORCE, then when dazed cap his ass? But that’s pretending that these dolls have brains.By the way, the Samurai dodges the spear (if he can dodge a sword up close, why not?) then sacrafices an arm to cut off the Spartan’s leg, then beheads him. I’ll give the Spartan’s this: it’s the only match-up where it can’t really be decided because the Spartan’s did sacrafice full armor for near completely moveability, but weight is still weight and 2 feet is still 2 to 3. The simple fact that the Samurai were able to last as long as they did against superior weaponry really tends to make me believe this. By this, I mean even thoguh they were obscure, they still managed to exist with their lifestyle. They were not replaced by guns for such a long time because their level of skill still had a place society. But now we’re talking about armies again and fact of the matter is, a lone Spartan, ocne he tossed that spear, had a full quiver of arrows to attend to…and didn’t that kind of samurai have a horse? Even neglecting the whole, “why the fuck are they fighting in the first place?” how does Spike decide what’s fair? Because I gaurentee you, if you gave me a shotgun and told me to take on 1 unarmored special ops guy who is using his bear hands and jsut gunna run the fuck at me from across the field, I’d win with one shot.
- Anonymous
  
  It just baffles me why the pirate used the grenade like that in the sim. It almost seemed like he was just like, “okay, use this then this.” well all he really had to do was keep moving around incase the knight tried to use the cross bow from horseback (could they do that? if they weren’t trained to, then there’s really no arguement at all—just want till the horse was close—duck and fire. It’s not liek you’re contending with other people…it’s one dude and you have a gun…the way it came across was that knights were determined to use specefic weapons from horseback–and I don’t blame them, in that armor while on a horse, it’d be damn near impossible to accurately fire a crossbow without falling over, nevermind if the oppoenent was wise to it and took that missed shot as an opportunity totake advantage and fire back himself).
  - Anonymous
    
    The Samurai also made it a ponit in the Viking vs Samurai episode that these Samurai, the ones the Deadliest Warrior/Spike picked, not the swordmasters, but the army varient from a time past, were trained to fire the bows from horseback. It almsot doesn’t even make sense to use them on the ground given how freakin big they are. Why does the kniight get a horse vs an unmounted opponent? Because his opponent has a gun? WHY DID NAPOLEON GET OFF THE FUCKIN HORSE?! HONOR?! REALLY?! THAT GUY?!
    
    For fuck’s sake! This isn’t Deadliest Warrior, it’s “Spike decides what about a culture was warrior-like given the people they were facing because they have to be fair in our eyes—oh wait, except Napoleon would never invade North America with 4 dudes–fuck, even Vegeta brought a partner and 5 minions with him to Japan.”

http://www.facebook.com/people/Konstantin-Akhmetov/100000303416185 Konstantin Akhmetov

>>>They seem to almost completely disregard the weaponry, favoring these new X-factors instead. Maybe this new software is a basic, four-function calculator.

It kinda looked like this in s3e1, but now it doesn’t.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Natalie-Jones/100001438912549 Natalie Jones

VAMPIRE NAZI MONKEYS WHO ARE ALSO ZOMBIES VS. WARE WOLF,CYBORG GORILLAS WITH LASERS. (…….no,that’s just silly.)

Anonymous

SILVERHAWKS vs G-FORCE!

Anonymous

Vampires vs Golems!

Anonymous

Vampires vs Golems!

http://www.facebook.com/pimmeln Herum Pimmeln

Terminators VS Predators

http://www.facebook.com/people/Juan-Jose-Martinez/100000875267385 Juan Jose Martinez

One thing I would like to see is a better version of Alien vs Predator.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Shane-Love/100001395740607 Shane Love

You lost me when you try to argue that rifles lose to muskets. I want you to look down the barrel down every modern day gun and tell me what you see. The rifle allowed the americans to snipe key targets. read some history about the America revolution and come back to me.

I agree what you said about doctor Dorian and meat head..

Anonymous

…You’ve never stepped into a lab have you. Ever taken scientific methodology classes?

Science may not explain everything, and by god this show isn’t accurate to say the least. But then why try to make it seem scientific at all? For starters: muskets aren’t used like that, period. It’s the same as comparing a machine gun and a sniper rifle, each given 5 shots, and then not take rate of fire into account.

“Every thing is based on human opinions”

Good science isn’t based on opinions. Real experiments (by real I mean stuff performed by real scientists, not meatheads in their backyard) are not subjected to bias (if it is, you get a shitload of citations saying you’re full of crap and become a laughing stock). It doesn’t matter what your methodology and techniques are, when you’ve got bias, your experiment and data are worthless. End of story.

“…then there is inherit statistical error.”

That’s what statistical tests are used for. The fact that they don’t give standard deviations is the least of their problems really.
Anonymous

Most American troops were armed with muskets during the war. Rifles were issued to very few soldiers.

Anonymous

Another thing not mentionned about the methodology is that many times the result are not statistically significant. Take for example IRA vs Taliban. IRA won 517 times out of 1000. So this shows IRA wins cause they are better right? No. If you flip a coin 1000 times, do you expect to get 500 heads and 500 tails? No. About 30% of the time, you will get a result that deviates from 500 heads/500 tails by 17 or more (like for example 517 heads/483 tails).

This can mean 2 things:

1) IRA is just slightly better, winning about 52% of the time

or

2) They are evenly matched, and the 17 extra victory is just a regular deviation from the norm you would expect from running an experiment 1000 times.

In science, you would either

-choose 2) if you can’t make any more measurements

-make more measurements!

Make them fight 10000 times. Are they affraid they will break the guy’s laptop? If you get IRA 5170, Taliban 4830, it become much more significant (less than 0.1% chance of it happening with a coin) and you know for sure IRA is better.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Vic-Gastel/100002606308364 Vic Gastel

Vampires Vs Immortals (Highlander)

http://www.facebook.com/people/Vic-Gastel/100002606308364 Vic Gastel

Vampires Vs Immortals (Highlander)

http://www.facebook.com/people/Vic-Gastel/100002606308364 Vic Gastel

Vampires Vs Immortals (Highlander)

Anonymous

Vampires vs. Fulgore.

I just had to say that.

Anonymous

Vampires vs. Fulgore.

I just had to say that.

http://www.facebook.com/people/James-Philippon/672106239 James Philippon

Vampires vs. CAPTAIN POWER AND THE SOLDIERS OF THE FUTURE!!!

http://www.facebook.com/people/James-Philippon/672106239 James Philippon

Vampires vs. CAPTAIN POWER AND THE SOLDIERS OF THE FUTURE!!!

http://www.facebook.com/people/Samuel-Kitchen/100001774158395 Samuel Kitchen

Dude..Deadliest Warrior Legends. Must review.

http://profiles.google.com/commissarmanul Алексей Бекедов

I’d love if they do let’s say, Churchill vs. Stalin or Hitler. Churchill’s weapon of choice- the Tommy Gun! Close combat weapons- his cigar and whiskey glass.
Or maybe- Reb Brown vs. Schwarzenegger

http://www.facebook.com/people/Ben-Yandle/100000266241928 Ben Yandle

if we are doing fictional races, i would like to see vampires vs elves. i feel like that would be kinda interesting.

Anonymous

Tolkien elves or Pratchett elves? Or just the regular fairy midgets with pointy ears?
Personally, I’m a fan of the tree-hugging, cannibal elves of Dorf Fortress.

http://www.facebook.com/ogresamanosuke Cameron Hamilton

Oh come now Noah, you expect quality programming from Spike? Or actual belief in the scientific method? Mythbusters this is not. I got through one episode ever before I declared it total garbage, Sun Tzu vs Vlad the Impalor. Yeah, let’s compare the guy that wrote The Art of War, and have him lose to the basis for Dracula. Despite the thousands of years between them, and Sun Tzu being a guy that knew strategies of war, not actual physical power.

Anonymous

The cannon test where a bit weird. I
was quite surprised when I heard that the 8-pdr was made of iron, I
was sure the French also used bronze cannons. So I looked up the
French cannons in a couple of books and found out that the 8-pdr
field gun had a weight of 12 000 lbs (580 kg): In the episode they
said it had a weight of 2470 lbs (1 120 kg), which is the weight of
the siege 8-pdr. I suspect that iron was used for siege guns since
manoeuvrability was less important in sieges and iron is cheaper. So
not only where the test bad, they tested a gun that was intended for
sieges as it was field artillery. Don’t think it mattered much
though, since it seems like they took weight in to account. There
Napoleon probably had an advantage in the case of bronze cannons,
since the French had improved cannon-making so they could be made
lighter, but still have the same calibre. Their artillerist where
better trained and organized to but the show still don’t address that
.Then it’s a bit funny that the Americans used both
Charleville muskets and French cannons in the their War of
Independence that France gave them, some where sent even before
France entered the war. They where ,however, of earlier models than
the ones used by Napoleon’s armies. Also a bit funny that during
the Napoleonic wars, a 6-pdr was introduced to replace the 8-pdr
field piece along with the 4-pdr, since it eased logistics and the
6-pdr could fill both roles of it’s predecessors.Btw, bronze
has higher density than iron, but since bronze is more durable it can
be made with thinner barrels and therefore lighter.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Lone-Wolf/1071408198 Lone Wolf

You just don’t get the show. To get the show you need to take a hammer and hit your self in the head with the claw end of the hammer until it has the comparable effect to the average red neck or ghetto mother smacking her son in the head for 15 to 18 years and heavy alcohol, pot and possibly meth use starting at 11 to 13 years old. Then you’ll get it.

Anonymous

If they are going to take intelligence of the time out of the equation, why don’t they just give people the average size/weight of the warrior (in great shape, mind you) a year to train with the weaponry/armor, then give them fake, non-lethal versions to them, pit thme against one another, and count the hits? Obviously they’d have to work with a historian and a weapons expert… but they only air like 10 shows a year, so they could realisticly do this, and at least take the results into consideration. There was that clip on the aftermath of the viking shield vs a sword…just how hard is it to get around a shield or destroy it before you get hit? Real-life experience could factor in…certaintly they need to be well-trained, not some jag-offs with sticks, because well, masters would get inbetween armor, but which happens first?

http://twitter.com/AFDex16 Tony F.

truthfully i think the medic is the least useless guy on that show, while i do agree that he can be bullshitting and not knowing the scientific method or experiment setups, it’s still interesting to know what body parts were effected and such.

Anonymous

Actually, anyone that did physiology and anatomy could fill that role. Someone with some knowledge in vascular physiology/biomechanics will be able to tell when a wound will cause enough pressure drop to kill. I agree with you, don’t get me wrong, but they really don’t need to flash the MD card around (ok, for regular Spike enthusiasts, maybe), and they certainly don’t need a MD to tell you that shotgun to the face = kill (which, unfortunately, is what most of the cases are).
I actually think the guys are just acting (I mean really, you have to be brain dead to think this show is serious business). Geoff (aka the meathead) has a masters in BME, and is (last I checked was a year ago, don’t quote me) doing a PhD in mechanical engineering. But I do feel sorry for the “experts” that get pulled on this show though.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1484041179 Chris Sliwinski

Vampires vs. Robotic-Werewolves!

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1484041179 Chris Sliwinski

Better yet, MacLeod vs. Darth Vader!

http://www.facebook.com/people/Alex-Quigley/512694477 Alex Quigley

Correct me if I’m wrong, but wasn’t Washington’s army more focused on gorilla warfare rather then the structured lines napoleon was accustomed to fighting? Napoleon was successful due to the use of his cannons, in close range, destroying several rows of dudes. The American revolutionaries were not fighting in lines as much, as running round taking pot shots with their shitty equipment.

I say your asking who would win, American revolutionaries vs European military… and history already gave us that outcome!

http://twitter.com/JJJMMM1 JM

Cannons had been used for a long time before Napoleon. His artillery tactics were superior to those of other European powers, but that is just one of the many reasons why Napoleon was so succesful against bigger armies.

Your last paragraph is a bit weird for a couple of reasons:

1) The American revolutionary war was more than Americans vs. Britons showdown on American soil. By 1778 it was a global conflict with France and Spain fighting alongside Americans.

2) Comparing the British detachments in North America to Napoleon’s Grande Armée is ludicrous. Organization, logistics, leadership, strategy and tactics were far superior in Napoleon’s army. The term “European military” means exactly nothing, since there were dozens of different national armies in Europe both in the 1700′s and 1800′s. It would be like equating Washington’s militia with the Iroquis just because they’re on the same continent.

3) Saying that American revolutionaries of that time would win a European military (which ever army that might be) is impossible without a context. We know what happened in history when the war was fought on American soil with Britain at war on many fronts on both sea and land, but that only proves what happened in those exact conditions. Before Saratoga, things didn’t look good at all for Americans and if France hadn’t joined the war, it might’ve lasted for a much longer time and the outcome might’ve been a lot different.
Anonymous

The term is “Guerrilla”. It’s a spanish term meaning “little war”. Gorillas have, unfortunately, had very little to do with warfare throughout the ages. Though it would have been awesome if they had.
Anonymous

The term is “Guerrilla”. It’s a spanish term meaning “little war”. Gorillas have, unfortunately, had very little to do with warfare throughout the ages. Though it would have been awesome if they had.

http://profiles.google.com/imperialus1 Dave I

Couple problems with your cannon analysis Spoony.

Napoleon was famous for completely redefining artillery tactics, he advanced his artillery in conjunction with infantry, made horse artillery a key component of his forces, and was probably the greatest artillery commander in history. This is probably due to the fact that he started out in the army as a corporal within the French royal artillery. On the other hand nearly every other general of the period started out in the Cavalry.

The ‘American’ gun that they seem to be referring to in Deadliest Warrior (and I can’t say for sure not having seen the show) was probably a Gribeauval gun… Which, if the name didn’t give it away was a French gun developed in the 1760′s. In other words, they’re comparing a French gun, to a… French gun.

Remember kids, nearly every piece of professionally manufactured equipment used during the American Revolution was given to the Yanks by the French.

Anonymous

Don’t know if it was a Gribeauval they used, but it would be wrong to use them in the tests. The French gave the Americans cannons, some even before France entered the war, but as far as I know they only gave them cannons of the de Vallière system, which was being replaced by the Gribeauval system and therefore getting obsolete. They used Gribeauval guns themselves during the American Revolutionary War though. An of course during their own Revolutionary War and the Napoleonic wars

http://profiles.google.com/imperialus1 Dave I

Couple problems with your cannon analysis Spoony.

Napoleon was famous for completely redefining artillery tactics, he advanced his artillery in conjunction with infantry, made horse artillery a key component of his forces, and was probably the greatest artillery commander in history. This is probably due to the fact that he started out in the army as a corporal within the French royal artillery. On the other hand nearly every other general of the period started out in the Cavalry.

The ‘American’ gun that they seem to be referring to in Deadliest Warrior (and I can’t say for sure not having seen the show) was probably a Gribeauval gun… Which, if the name didn’t give it away was a French gun developed in the 1760′s. In other words, they’re comparing a French gun, to a… French gun.

Remember kids, nearly every piece of professionally manufactured equipment used during the American Revolution was given to the Yanks by the French.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000065433429 Sam Pagano

The show would be much better if they just loaded up Empire Total War and just had two really experienced players of the game play it.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000065433429 Sam Pagano

Shit I just thought of how they could simulate atleast some of it because of that comment, the engine they used for Total War is available to shows and stuff to allow exactly the kind of thing your describing.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_NJIH2D3DH7OBRDIPHJILZL5AEU Fred

tidus vs squall

http://www.facebook.com/TheSeventhSword Rich Radwan

Vampires VS Necromorphs

http://www.facebook.com/people/Thomas-Alun-Jones/717960834 Thomas Alun Jones

SG1 vs The Daleks

http://www.facebook.com/people/Thomas-Alun-Jones/717960834 Thomas Alun Jones

SG1 vs The Daleks

http://www.facebook.com/people/Doug-Cordray/806408974 Doug Cordray

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Pussys-On-The-Pavement/170198573051586?sk=info

http://twitter.com/Yuoaman Nick Burns

If the Russians can’t beat you – then their winter will. Napoleon had to learn this the hard way.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Chris-Peavey/601035413 Chris Peavey

The thing that hacks me off about this show is that if you got some qualified folks with some real expertise, it would be awesome. Get Meathead away from the show and I’d watch the crap out of this.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Chris-Peavey/601035413 Chris Peavey

Also? You and Death Battle have one very important difference. You don’t have that putz who’s trying so damn hard to sound like Kenny Blankenship and Harry Plinkett’s love child.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Chris-Peavey/601035413 Chris Peavey

Also? You and Death Battle have one very important difference. You don’t have that putz who’s trying so damn hard to sound like Kenny Blankenship and Harry Plinkett’s love child.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Robert-Harden/1197492169 Robert Harden

Spoony do your research! the “edges are just opinions and entertainment! The Producers have said many times that The edges have no influence on the final result!

http://www.facebook.com/people/Robert-Harden/1197492169 Robert Harden

oh and they can’t show everything they do in the show its only a hour long take away commercials and that’s 45 min. If they showed every test they did it would be 4 hours long!

Why the hell do you care so much? it’s A fucking tv show its not meant to be taken too seriously!
I like you spoony ,but Shut up about it if you don’t like the show don’t watch it!

http://twitter.com/JJJMMM1 JM

Why would anyone care about any entertainment or share his/her opinions of it? Because it’s what people do. You wouldn’t even have to be a critic to do it.

Spoony never complained that there aren’t enough tests in Deadliest Warrior. The problem is that the tests they do are not scientific in any way. The setups don’t make sense, the conclusions are laughable and they aren’t even consistent with their criteria for conclusions between different tests. Or those were some of his main complaints.

I believe the reason why he criticizes the show is the fact that it’s has a very interesting premise and it could be done well. He gave an example of how it could be done in this very vlog.

I personally don’t care about the show, since I don’t watch it. It’s retarded and made worse by the pseudo-science they sprinkle here and there to make it seem somehow scientific, when it’s basically just meatheads who know nothing about history whacking pig carcasses with battle axes. The simulation in the end isn’t a sufficient payoff for me.
Anonymous

Four hours only? That definitely clears up why this show is crap.

To offer a comparison: It takes me longer than that to analyze a set of MRI images (I’m a grad student, scientific research is what I do, unlike these clowns. But that includes reconstruction). Before I went into MRI, I’ve done eight hour sittings doing genetics work as a summer intern during my first year summer as an undergrad. Guess what? Those were small parts to the project and not at all presentable.

Take home message: don’t talk about stuff you have absolutely no clue of, it makes you look like an idiot.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Francis-Bisaillon/100000752748798 Francis Bisaillon

Just to clarify about the Cannons that I would imagine was neglected in Deadliest Warrior.

For centuries cannon were made of bronze, at first in solid pieces, then in an effort to cut costs, doing the wine barrel method (staves laterally pressed together bound together with iron hoops. Useless trivia, that’s where the term ‘barrel’ came from where it comes to firearms) Problem is refinement of gunpowder ruptured these cannons easily so they had no choice but to cast cannon in solid pieces. Bronze was the common practice of the time but again this was woefully expensive and even the richest of powers couldn’t afford masses of cannon. Iron was cheap and plentiful but at the time, forging technology was insufficient to cast cannon with iron, Until Tudor times when the blast furnace came about.

By the late 18th and early 19th century. Most military cannon were made of iron. This was mostly because of economics, Iron Cannon were simply cheaper and could take the pressure of the blackpowder of the time. American Cannon during those days were few because of the lack of heavy industry in a mostly agrarian 13 Colonies of the time. Yes the advantage of bronze is that they are lighter compared to Iron, but you can’t get many of them at any given time. If Washington had the choice, he’d probably have his iron guns, simply to have alot of them. It’s one reason why America lacked a Navy during the time, Without Iron Cannon, the multi-gun ships of the period would have been pretty much impossible.

So in short, Napoleon’s army might have had heavier guns to deal with, But he had alot more of them. And being a long time fan of artillery he demanded high standards from his battery crews.

Anonymous

Most cannons where of iron but most of those where siege or naval cannons. Field guns however, where most of the time made of bronze (sometimes called brass during that time). For field cannons less weight was such a big advantage it was worth to use it if you could, despite the cost.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Ashley-Baillie/100002152756791 Ashley Baillie

Spoony plz talk about another episode of this show youare soo awesome.

http://twitter.com/MitchellTF Charles Anderson

Two things: 1. I know an animator who is THEORETICALLY possible. E-mail me at MitchellTF(at)hotmail.com
2. I’m watching this, and found it incredibly entertaining. *designs a Deadliest Warrior that sucks less*

http://www.facebook.com/henri.paves Henri Paves

Haha, meathead! That’s brilliant! Some of the best meathead moments here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IV0F1q9BKME

http://www.facebook.com/people/Gabriela-Mizerija/100000750048199 Gabriela Mizerija

Napoleon WON when he invaded Russia???? ORLY? As a Russian myself I can’t even begin to tell how insulting this is. Spoony, you should not be embarrassed, you know history better than those jerks -_-

http://www.facebook.com/people/Gabriela-Mizerija/100000750048199 Gabriela Mizerija

Napoleon WON when he invaded Russia???? ORLY? As a Russian myself I can’t even begin to tell how insulting this is. Spoony, you should not be embarrassed, you know history better than those jerks -_-

http://www.facebook.com/people/Gabriela-Mizerija/100000750048199 Gabriela Mizerija

oh and vampires vs mages would be a better pick :D
http://twitter.com/JJJMMM1 JM

What are you talking about? What did they say?

http://www.facebook.com/people/Cecelie-Keys/100000616854808 Cecelie Keys

National Geographic’s Fight Science was very scientific. They should have asked those scientists to come on the show.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1420812357 Quentin Poe Caffero

you should talk about the Saddam vs. Pol Pot that is coming up i think you’ll make a hilarious review of that.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Patrik-Roslund/100000885845191 Patrik Roslund

Basicly what you were saying is dont fuck whit russia. Even though Napoleon read the war diare of Karl xii. Hitler never did. He should have. And if you dont know who karl xii is you should read about a general who fought battles and won 10 to 1 fights.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Maciej-Chrominski/1431213951 Maciej Chromiński

i think there was only one time somebody conquered the Russia (for a short time),

and it was us – Poles, as ussual though we then started fighting among ourself for power thus losing the war… :)

but it still counts

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polish%E2%80%93Muscovite_War_%281605%E2%80%931618%29
- Anonymous
  
  A civil war that started a war that was stopped by a civil war.
  
  INCEPTION!
- Anonymous
  
  A civil war that started a war that was stopped by a civil war.
  
  INCEPTION!
- Anonymous
  
  The only people who ever truly conquered Russia were the Mongols, but then it wasn’t really Russia as much as it was a bunch of warring principalities. The Poles did have a grasp on power for a short time, but it was too short to say they truly “conquered” Russia.

Anonymous

“And the French didn’t have to deal with [disease and that shit]”

What? Have the guys on Deadliest Warrior never heard of Napoleon’s long, long retreat from Moscow?

http://www.facebook.com/people/Robert-Harden/1197492169 Robert Harden

Sorry Spoony, but, you like most people are looking at this with the wrong mindset! You are looking at this with a dueling mindset, not a survival mindset! You’re are trying to treat a situation where two people are trying to kill each other the same as a martial arts fight or an UFC match! Fighting and survival aren’t the same and mustn’t treated as such! If I have a knife in hand I can kill any of the Gracies, because equipment does matter, its not fun, its not fair, but that’s how the world works! Learn to deal with it

Anonymous

well at risk of starting a flame war on a potentially dead post….no you couldn’t, equipment does matter but only so far as the training that goes into the equipment. and judging by the fact that you have completely disregarded the gracie’s training i’m assuming you have very little if any combat training with a knife. although a lucky blow will kill your enemy, 9 times out of 10 a bare handed gracie make you pay dearly for having attacked him with a knife. you sir would be a very lucky man to come out of that fight at all, likely you would have multiple limbs dislocated or alltogether broken.

the simple fact of the matter is that gracie jiujitsu is designed for a street fight. you sir have brought a knife to a fight when you should have brought a gun because i can guarantee royce gracie has hundreds of hours training for an attacker who has a knife. its not fun its not fair but thats how the world works! learn to deal with it
- http://twitter.com/Sovvolf Steven Skelly
  
  Disarming people with weapons such as knifes and other melee weapons goes pretty much hand in hand with most martial arts training including BJJ or FJJ. I’ve trained at quite a few different gyms and in everyone from Muay Thai to Teakwondo have had basic weapon defense and disarming techniques drilled and driller. Its even more prominent in grappling style.
  
  You come at me with a knife and you better know what you’re doing cause you’re losing the use off that arm for a good few weeks. This is just from me who’s mostly an amateur and trains MA in the spare time as an hobby. You try that on a Gracie and God be with you.
  
  Here’s a good common rule, unless your trained enough to know what your doing, its not a very good idea to try to take a martial artist on in CQC regardless of what your holding in your hand. Use a gun and be at a decent range cause they don’t teach how to dodge bullets in most MA classes.
  - http://www.facebook.com/people/Adam-Ahmed/829090170 Adam Ahmed
    
    Dude, i love martial arts, but man, knife defense is TOUGH. I mean even a trained martial artist would have a hard time against someone who DOESN’T do filipino martial arts or know proper knife fighting if they piston it.
    
    A pistoned knife attack is hard to defend against, no matter what you train.
    
    Im not saying it’s IMPOSSSIBLE to work with, but like you i have done lots of martial arts.
    
    And KNIVES ARE VERY DANGERIOUS WEAPONS. At close range, a knife is as dangerious as a gun.
    Gracie or not…..knives are no laughing matter. Not funny if a normal layman has a knife, utterly horrible if a skilled knife fighter has it.
    
    And i bet the gracies would be the first to tell you that!

http://twitter.com/getintheVandell Vandell

Vampires.

Vs.

Dinosaurs.

Anonymous

Stormtroopers vs Zombies

adrewan

Robocop vs terminator 800

Strelnikov

Rocky vs. Rambo

http://twitter.com/Jerkakame Jerkakame

Galactic Empire vs Skynet vs Brotherhood of nod.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_6BBHEPXPH77464ICZCM5HUVJSA Matt S

to fix the problem with the guns, by which i mean you have two guys who aren’t trained in the weapons. what i would do is have the cannons set up by a machine, so it can aim perfectly. and fire multiple times to see which hits the target at the nearest points everytime. if that made any since.

http://twitter.com/Spokavriel Daniel Thomas Stack

Washington’s goal was Survival and Victory. He even had a battle where the entire plan was “Victory or Death” The goal was Freedom. Winning the chance to get away from laws that were in violation of the common liberties and rights history taught the founding fathers people had inherent in their nature since before recorded history. The Right to Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness. To defend ones self and ones property without being declared traitors for it. There is allot of history that isn’t even being taught any more.

http://twitter.com/DRezed Donny Reynolds

I just translated “toute le merde” I sort of know what it was to start with, but what the hell! It loosely translates to “All the Shit”.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_F6DCTUY6RUMWXJKGOICRNIAXCM André Norell

“Washington, his endurance is 4 points higher, he’s 76 and Napoleon’s a 72″.

You figure the men being sick would make their endurance lower, since they’re in a worse condition to fight… not that Napoleons troops didn’t have to deal with sickness and starvation either. Russia is a harsh mistress.

Strelnikov

“Meathead” sounds like Kim Jong-Un; he likes to point at things.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Josh-Curzon/100001142504496 Josh Curzon

I’ve noticed that since season 2 the meat head jock gets progressively more and more obnoxious and stupid… especialy when he tries to spice things up beyond going “FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRR!” and “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH”

http://profiles.google.com/likalaruku Allaiyah Weyn

Twilight: Even Vampires vs Werewolves can be lame.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=768002231 Daniel Magnus Zak

He attacked Russia in the Summer. He was kicking the shit out of them until it BECAME Winter.

http://www.facebook.com/people/Adam-Ahmed/829090170 Adam Ahmed

Go look up the DOg brothers.

zidanemaxout

Clearly, Napoleon was no match for Washington’s cunning and might. But Washington never met Bona-Parte deux…

http://www.facebook.com/people/Alfred-Pratt/100000510906259 Alfred Pratt

I don’t know if this has been mentioned before, I skimmed through the comments. You mention around 16 minutes into the video that you don’t think the men firing the muskets/rifles have any real experience with their weapons. As a revolutionary war re-enactor, I can correct that and say that it is very likely that these men knew how to handle these weapons. I’ve worked with a number of different re-enactment units and every serious member I met was well trained and even used their weapons for hunting purposes.
Not trying to sound like a douche or anything and I hope I don’t come across that way, but I felt the desire to stand up for these guys training.

http://twitter.com/bmacconnell1 Ben MacConnell

I suspect you’ve abandoned or permanently shelved plans for a Daleks vs Borg fight. But I wanted to get my two cents in regardless.

A much better match-up, and the one that sort of happened already, would be Borg Vs Cybermen. They are two cyborg civilizations that abandoned emotion and individual thought in favor of a central authority (Borg have a hive mind, Cybermen are strongly hierarchical), both absorb living people into their forces against their will, and both have powerful ambitions and technology behind them. They would be a much better match than Borg Vs Daleks, because you’re dealing with vastly different armies. Not to mention the Daleks have proven capable of dominating the Cybermen, Doctor Who’s equivalent to the Borg, with the most meager of forces (“We would exterminate the Cybermen with One Dalek!”).

Why I bring this up is because recently (at the time of this post), IDW published a miniseries crossing over Doctor Who and Star Trek: The Next Generation. And in that series, the Borg and the Cybermen joined forces. And it was awesome! They eventually started backstabbing each other, but that didn’t result in a straight up, fair fight. The Cybermen hacked the Borg collective so they just steamrolled through unopposed, and the remaining Borg had to ask the heroes for help. But it was still a great little crossover.

Too bad it went on for about eight months, so the story dragged horribly.

http://www.facebook.com/fredjoh.88 Fredrik Johansson

There really isn’t a difference in one pattern of musket’s accuracy over another’s. They were smooth-bore weapons with a ball smaller than the calibre of the barrel. The ball would bounce around as it left the barrel and there was no way to shoot straight with it. The only way to measure the effectiveness of the weapon is in the men who used them. The men who could reload the fastest and stand still and keep doing it under fire the longest would put out a larger volume of fire. Line vs column formation and the number of ranks the men were deployed in must also be taken into account.
Long story short, Deadliest Warrior is utter BS!

Support the Experiment!

Categories

Vlog 7-21-11 – Deadliest Warrior