Counter Monkey – Tandem’s Last Ride

Spoony | Nov 22 2011 | more | 
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My iconic character goes on a surreal journey, literally down the rabbit hole all the way to Dungeonland.

Edit: Well, there’s one good way to catastrophically botch the telling of a story. That’s to twitter user @Dutchtica I’ve been corrected that at the Tea Party, the Doormouse was a wererat, and it’s the Mad Hatter and March Hare who are the high-level monks. I’ve completely mis-remembered the story. It was the March Hare that I was brawling the whole time.

Shit. Shit shit shit. I feel awful now. I completely ruined the fucking story. I apologize. Any factual content can safely be assumed to range from mostly apocryphal to totally wrong.

Anyway, a couple of other corrections:

* I’m pretty sure Tandem was giving Athena a good rogering (which opens up a can of worms the size of Olympus concerning revenge and character motivations)– but really it was meant to be a hazy drunken memory of…something happening on Olympus that royally cheesed Zeus off. Zeus…who I called Thor several times, because my memory is completely scattershot anymore.

* I’ve also been told that Dungeonland is written for 9-12 level characters, and that our party was much higher level than that. I don’t really have an explanation for that, or if the DM rewrote large parts of it to deal with a higher-level party or not. I’m pretty sure the hookah-smoking caterpillar plays out the same way, but the Tea Party rumble? I don’t know. He might have figured 5 adventurers on 3 Tea Party members, he needed to jack up the Mad Hatter and March Hare to level 20. It would explain a few things.

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  • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

    FIRST BITCHES!!

    This is…such an honor. I like to thank my mom, and my high school gym teacher, and God, and Satan, and…

    • Anonymous

      WOOO~ SATAN!

  • http://twitter.com/Bassman_PhD Ben H.

    There’s a red blood dot on your forehead from when the Strangers were exchanging your memories with someone else.  Might want to look into that, dude.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

      In Hindi tradition, Spoony is married! And he’s also a woman.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

    Spoony’s character got caught in bed with a goddess?

    Well, hopefully the gal liked riding Tandem. BOOM!

    • Anonymous

      Man,you’re on FIYAH today. :3

  • deven west

    if not Aphrodite the goddess of love then it must be Athena the goddess of wisdom and strategy and that strange cause the gods usually have kids and stuff with humans

  • Bill Rosser

    Hey Noah, are you currently involved in any games right now? I know you don’t know me but I was planning on running something online through video chat and was curious.

    Hit me up on my email if you’re interested. (billamanjaro@gmail.com)

    :)

  • Anonymous

    Yeah i hate when people just call you by your race.

  • http://twitter.com/ihaveno_life Katrin H.

    Is there a physical description of Tandem Spoony? I really want to draw him now.

  • http://twitter.com/morgyn Morgan R

    There needs to be The Adventures of Tandem the Spoony comic or something. If only so this story is shared with the world. It would be glorious.

  • petyus1991

    Oh my god, it was the most epic story I’ve ever heard and I agree, there must be a comic, or even a movie about Tandem’s adventures.

    • Anonymous

      I was just thinking that this, along with some of the other Counter Monkey stories, actually could make a really kick-ass movie.  Sort of like one half Clerks, where a bunch of guys hanging out at a game store sit around and bullshit, talk about epic or disastrous RPG campaigns they’ve had and try to poison each other with Toilet Pizza, and one half some sort of CGI or traditionally animated fantasy where we see the stories of the RPG campaigns the characters are telling played out in all their epic glory (with frequent cut-aways back to the real people telling the stories).   This Dungeonland story could even be like the centerpiece, a multi-part story that the Spoony character keeps coming back to throughout the film.

      The thing is, Spoony would have to be in this film, and be telling at least some of the stories himself.  He just has a way of telling the story in a way that brings the fantasy world to life, yet still grounds it in the reality of a bunch of nerds sitting around a table playing with weird dice, that is crucial to making the whole thing work.  Now that I think of it, it would probably be hard for a film to really capture that perfect balance.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

        You know what. That is awesome. This needs to happen.

        As for the problem in your last paragraph, you could jump into the fantasy game when the characters are doing something, and go back to the players when they argue about the mechanics, roll dice, or otherwise take themselves out of the perspective of their characters.

      • Dennis Venner

        Or you could read the webcomic Commissioned: Live for 20. It’s basically that.

  • http://twitter.com/DieDissonanz Barry

    I miss my old roleplaying sessions. We had some epic stuff go down as well. Good times…

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

    Countersong, the ultimate buzz kill!

    And thus the Cleric and the Bard sailed off into the stars, where they immediately choked on the vacuum of space and died.

  • Anonymous

    Castle Greyhawk:  I guess that’s the module you play if you ever want to see what happens when players face a fire-giant with a kitted out GAU-8 Avenger.

  • http://twitter.com/_MEgamer_ Mariann R Eriksen

    my god…why cant this be a REAL story not only a dnd game!

    • Anonymous

      You’re right. I want to see a movie of this story!

  • Anonymous

    best story of all time

  • http://twitter.com/Enerccio Peter Vanusanik

    This was epic, spoony. I am not all that well in DnD, but are Liches so powerful?

    • http://twitter.com/ElizabethStr Elizabeth Sterling

      Liches are essentially mages who have reached the limit of either their lifespan or their mortal powers and look to tap the negative plane to continue their growth or study. That is to say they willingly die to become more powerful. They are nasty pieces of work that may, if unchecked, ascend in to demiliches that can imprison characters in their teeth.

      • doresh

        Don’t forget that they seal their soul inside a special phylactery (which is basically how someone turns into a lich). As long as this thing is still intact, it will always create a new body should the old one get destroyed (not sure why all those bodies have to be skeletons, but hey, it looks awesome XD ). So they’re basically like Sauron or Voldemort ^^ .

        Now, what would be some good domains and a favored weapon for a cleric of The Spoony…

  • Anonymous

    Epic adventure Spoony, I’d like to see that as a movie or even as a comic. I had my fare share of capmaign but usually it ended with the end of the war and so our team went there separate ways and stuff like that. I once ran into my own when the DM felt that it would be funny to talk to ‘myself’.
    Also I was the guy who never learned the others name, but only used in on one the elf. We did that thing to get reaction out of the other, the guy played a snobish elf fighter and his and my character a human blademaster from Ynew had a rivalry between them. He called me names like brute, rabbid dog. So I just stopped calling him by the name instead calling him pointy ear and stick up his ass tree hugger. It was dissapointing that the rivalry never got a result in the end, kind of forgot about it. 
    I hope we will hear more tails of Tandem the Spoony bard in the future. Even, if it is in a OpenRPG way.:D

  • Corey Longhurst

     I remeber this story being abridged on Live.lordkat.com when they had done D&D

  • http://twitter.com/Othy84 Tim Scott

    That was a good D&D story, deserves a round of applause.

  • http://twitter.com/Saronard Leo Schrey

    This video is the best and funniest thing on the internet.

  • http://profiles.google.com/jordanselby Jordan Selby

    Noah, you NEED to make more counter monkey stories like this. The pure length of this video is awesome, and it was definitely a joy to sit down and watch.

    PLEASE MAKE MORE LONG COUNTER MONKEY VIDEOS!

  • http://twitter.com/stairchicken Stephen Brady

    for the first few games i was the only one who actually learned any of the names in any of our D&D sessions, the other people actually were freaked out when I would refer to them as their characters or would sometimes just not register who they were suppose to be playing. Now I have more notes than our DM on our games, I’ve catalouge every single NPC and event that has happened to us in the hope that it will someday be useful, been a year now and its all been useless so far

    • Dennis Venner

      Heh heh, I did something like that once, Want a story?

      Stephen: Uh, how did you get in my house-

      SO, I was playing a mage game, My character, an Arete 3 mage (just think of it as magic power level, 3 is sort of middle of the road) is going on a seeking (A quest for more power, often times going on in the mage’s head).

      The seeking is epic, and goes into their backstory and such, but the moment in question where remembering an insignificant NPC becomes relevant is as follows.

      In one of the rooms, there was nothing but fire, it was the anger and resentment of all the souls the party had killed, and the ones that were dying (zombie apoc game, lots of those) Blaming my character for what happened to them and causing Aggravated damage and such.

      When I get an idea, “I want to speak with Robert Paulson!” My character shouts, the DM goes, “…Who?”

      Robert Paulson was the name of the very first NPC turned Zombie that the party ever killed, it had been mentioned offhand by one of the other player characters in a sort of “Between action” scene. I kept that in my mind and it really helped me out.

      So hang in there, if you’re clever, all that info will come in handy someday.

  • http://twitter.com/SteveJones313 Steven Caulfield

    Awesome story. Loving these segments.

  • Renaissance_nerd

    so let me get this right, Tandem is Kratos?

    • http://spoonyexperiment.com The Spoony One

      Well not really.  Instead of going on a murderous crusade against Olympus for revenge, he sort of just shrugged it off and went looking for a warm bed to sleep for a few days.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

        You know, like a sane person who is capable of admitting fault. Unlike Kratos.

        By the way, I couldn’t stand the story in GOW II and III for precisely this reason.

  • Jared Avnet

    Someone should probably tell Spoony that Castle Greyhawk was NOT a Gygax module, and, in fact, was considered by some a deliberate attempt to wreck his setting after he left the company (most likely not true, but still)

  • Darkscar

    Freaking epic story man, oreo seems to squeak at the right moments…..

  • Anonymous

    The Dormouse (Wererat: AC 6; MV 12”; HD 3 +1; hp 25; #AT 1; D sword [hidden under table] +2 [“to hit” and damage due to unusual size and strength]; SD harmed only by silver or +1 or better magic weapons).

    This monster has been cursed with a disease, a sleeping sickness that makes him lethargic at all times. This curse has changed the wererat’s disposition and unbalanced his mind also. Therefore, he will sit quietly, ignore harassment from his companions, and babble inanely most of the time. If attacked, the creature will uncover his sword and attack ferociously. Anyone who comes within 5’ of the Dormouse must save vs. Poison or be infected with the same disease he has, only the infected character, being from outside Dungeonland, will fall into comatose slumber and remain so until a cure disease is cast upon him or her. A successful save indicates that the character exposed is not subject to the disease, and no further check should be made.

  • Anonymous

    Best one yet. Really awesome story. Needs its own movie. Also, glad I’m not the only one that’s drawn to Bards.

  • Anonymous

    Damn that was epic. I really miss the Dethklok campaign now.

  • Anonymous

    PRISMATIC SPRAY – This spell has changed over many editions, but here’s the 3.5 version. 

    EVOCATION
    Sor/Wiz 7
    Casting Time: 1 action
    Range: 60ft Cone

    This spell causes seven shimmering, intertwined, multicolored beams of light to spray from your hand. Each beam has a different power. Creatures in the area of the spell with 8 HD or less are automatically blinded for 2d4 rounds. Every creature in the area is randomly struck by one or more beams, which have additional effects. See below:

    Roll 1d8

    1 -Red  20 points fire damage (Reflex half)
    2-Orange  40 points acid damage (Reflex half)
    3-Yellow  80 points electricity damage (Reflex half)
    4-Green  Poison (Kills; Fortitude partial, successful save = 1d6 points of Con damage instead)
    5-Blue  Turned to stone (Fortitude negates)
    6-Indigo  Insane, as insanity spell (Will negates)
    7-Violet  Sent to another plane (Will negates)
    8-            Struck by two rays; roll twice more, ignoring any “8” results.

    *My favorite color is Indigo.  What’s yours?

  • Anonymous

    I love these stories. You tell them in such a way that it makes it seem like you actually did all these things.. I love it!

  • Stephen Smith

    I’ve avoided joining up on this site and TGWTG mainly because the comments usually aren’t something I want to get involved in, as they tend to degrade into silly arguments that are mildly amusing to read, but I wouldn’t want to participate in them.

    For this video, though, I had to tell you that I don’t care even the slightest iota about Dungeons and Dragons — and yet you totally had me hypnotized, captivated and entertained the entire time.  More of these videos would be most welcome, Mr. Spoony!

  • Anonymous

    Damn, these stories get more and more epic. From a deck of many things, to blowing up the Prince and his vampires, to killing everything in Wonderland and sailing into the stars… of course, you’re probably going to top this one, and that makes me feel all tingly inside.

  • lemartes_7000

    I just started playing rpg:s I hope my games will be as epic in the future!

  • Stephen Smith

    Double post.

  • http://twitter.com/Okanehira Okanehira

    This was fucking awesome yet again, my favourite after the guy who ran away with the deck of many things and the water guns.

    I have never played a game of DnD in my life but these keep me glued to the screen the whole way through, hell sometimes i pause it just so i can look up some of the terms and items.

    The “reveal” about the worm trying to seduce you was awesome, it was like the damn Darth Revan reveal, and your solution was cool as hell.

  • http://twitter.com/VaterYester Kajetan Dworski

    spoon·y Adjective /ˈspo͞onē/ 

    Synonyms:
    adjective: foolish, fatuous
    noun: simpleton, mug, spooney

    spoonier comparative; spooniest superlativeSentimentally or foolishly amorousI was spoony over Miss Talmadge to the point of idolatryFoolish; silly

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

      Ummm… I don’t think the page you pulled that from copied over the ‘Enter’ characters. They’re just fused together, like you forgot to use the space.

      And at the top there’s that box character you see when you try to load the wrong thing into a word document. I think it’s the stand in character used when the program can’t be read as anything discernible in ASCII code.

      • http://twitter.com/VaterYester Kajetan Dworski

        It looked fine before I posted it. Oh well, should be fixed now. 

        • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

          Yeah, I think it’s something to do with Disqus. I don’t see it anymore.

  • wiliamsn

    I don’t think the March Hare or the Dormouse actually attack unless challenged by the players…
    I think the March Hare was a monk and the Dormouse was a diseased were-rat…

  • Anonymous

    Heck.. sounds like Mcgee’s alice. Gives me chills when trying to remember what kind of hell that game was when it came out first time and played it. Considering i was around 10 or 11 years old when that shit came out and i played it..

  • E S

    Gotta say i’m loving the RPG stories, great stuff and the AD&D stuff is almost enough to make me start up a game again. (easier now to find a group with all the retro-clones floating about)

    Tourney modules were great fun and some people were even crazy skilled enough to beat them. My group just tried to see who got the farthest before dying.

    WG7: Castle Greyhawk is probably the most hated module among Greyhawk fans as it was a VERY anticipated module that turned out to be a parody. One little note is that it wasn’t written by Gygax, many people speculated it was written as a slam against him and his occasionally gonzo-style since he had just recently left TSR.

    While Gygax did put out more than his fair share of killer dungeons and a few badly implemented ones he did also throw out a few great modules. B2: Keep on the Borderlands comes to mind. And the G and D series of modules still stands up well to the modern stuff.

  • Anonymous

    Really digging the hell out of these CM stories. Keep’em coming when you feel like doing so… 

  • http://twitter.com/Spokavriel Daniel Thomas Stack

    Ok I know this is likely just a big coincidence but this isn’t the first time I heard of Tandem the Spoony. I was at an independent living facility in Las Vegas and someone brought up the character there. Not really sure why but it was like 10-15 years ago. Wish I could remember his name. Thanks for sharing the story.

  • doresh

    Did you meet Alice in Dungeonland?

    “Oh, who are y…” – “DIE, BITCH!” – “ARGH!”

    And I’m a bit shocked you didn’t mention the Tomb of Horrors, the classic meatgrinder of the old adventures. It featured LOTS of traps and cursed items made specifically to piss players of (quite a lot of them basically had a flat chance of killing you), AND the final battle is against a Demilich who automatically kills one player per round, stealing his soul (kinda like Cthulhu lite) and can only be damaged with by rather obscure means. Sounds fun, right?

  • David Feichtner

    That is just a great ending for a character if you ask me!
    Open for return and with a bit of Peter Pan.
    I would like to see my guys find a place like that!

  • http://twitter.com/StevenBanta Steven Banta

    I know I’m not the first to ask, but Spoony, if you’re ever interested in setting up an online d&d adventure, let me know!  sbanta31@hotmail.com  By the way, AWESOME story :)

  • Anonymous

    i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again — Counter Monkey is the best new series from Spoony in two years (next to Let’s Play SWAT4). Keep ‘em coming! Awesome stuff. I’ve always been interested in shit like this. I’m now 26, and after seeing all of these awesome stories, I’m considering playing role playing games for the first time. It’s not too hard though, since i lover Mass Effect, Elder Scrolls, and Dragon Age Origins. I love the world, and I am looking forward to geetin a group together. Thanks, Spoony! Get better. I know shit is rough from time to time with ya! Keep your chin up!

  • http://twitter.com/kevin_video Derek B

    You switched over between talking about Zeus to talking about Thor, and said Thor was the one who threw you off Mount Olympus.

    What’s sick is that Dungeonland was originally meant for PCs 9-12 level, and you guys were much higher. It blows my mind.

    • http://spoonyexperiment.com The Spoony One

      Yeah, it was Zeus.  Sorry.

      I’m almost certain I got the levels of our PCs right, so either the DM ran the adventure as intended (20th level monk door mouse??) or he buffed up the monsters. But I’m pretty sure he ran it straight-up.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_ICDHG7TLTN6JVK6JMK3TKQFXKQ Mike Wallace

    Noah! We who are about to roll salute you! I raise my golden goblet in your honor. That was one of the best stories I’ve heard and a really fantastic ending. Maybe not for the stoned or dead guys, but for Tandem it was one hell of an end: a new beginning.

    Space. The Final Frontier. These are the voyages of the starjammer Spoony One. It’s continuing mission; to explore strange new modules, to seek out new spells and new incantations, to boldly go where no bard has gone before…

    http://i868.photobucket.com/albums/ab246/thehungryogre/Countersong.png

  • http://twitter.com/qalest Qalest

    Just to be a D&D snob, WG7 – Castle Greyhawk was written by contributing writers (Paul Jaquays wrote ”Level 4 - There’s No Place Like Up”) that didn’t necessarily strive to create cohesive dungeon levels.  The overall tone of the module was pretty silly/wacky like old Tom Wham board games (Mertwig’s Maze).  Mordenkainen was a spoof of an NPC – not really reflecting what he meant to the canon Greyhawk campaign.  The real villian was Voyeux, an Illusionist who was cursed to watch characters fumble through the dungeon on a big screen TV and create absolutely the most random horrors (think the Hordelings 1st ed. Monster Manual II random tables) ever released.  A closer module to a canon Castle Greyhawk was 2nd ed. WGR1, Greyhawk Ruins – where the Mad Mage Zagyg resided.

  • Anonymous

    Heheheh, all these AD&D stories really take me back.  When you said he cast prismatic spray, I had flashbacks to a near party wipe my D&D group had!  Keep em comin’ Spoon!

  • Steve Conwell

    Terrific job, Spoony!  I’ve really enjoyed your CM stories (the first video I watched of yours was your review of 4th ed. D&D)

    Can’t wait to Trooper in the Expendables!

  • http://twitter.com/WolfCoder 狐・小百合

    You need to make a video of you singing “Fear of the Dark” really enthusiastically, it would be the most awesome thing ever!

  • Anonymous

    If it wasn’t Aphrodite, then it was Athena.

    Which is doubly strange, because she is known as the virgin goddess. She never had any interest in such things.

    I guess it’s the deity equivalent of one the sexually repressed librarian or something.

    It’s kinda disappointing that everything in Wonderland was trying to kill and/or dominate you. The hooka smoking caterpillar was pretty clever, I admit, but I still think the adventure would be better if there were some denizens who were helpful or, at least, not actually hostile (the Cheshire Cat is actually a good canidate; his advice can be helpful but often is obscure and has double meanings).

    The characters at the Mad Hatter’s tea party are, if I recall: The Hatter, the Dormouse and the March Hare. Well, and Alice Liddel, but you apparently did not encounter Alice herself. It sounds like there weren’t even any riddles! Granted, the riddles don’t have any answers, but that’s not the point.

    Another way to have done that adventure is to base it on the perceptions of the party themselves. That is, Wonderland (or, I guess, ‘Dungeonland’) changes according to the disposition of the party. A paranoid or casually cruel adventuring party (which most in AD&D were, let’s face it — hey, Orcs are Always Chaotic Evil, therefore it’s perfectly fine to slaughter them without reason!) would find Wonderland a nightmarish place like in the official adventure, but a more mentally flexible one (the types to try and believe five impossible things before breakfast) would find Wonderland insane and strange, but not exactly deadly.

  • http://twitter.com/EpicNinjaShiro Patryk Halaczkiewicz

    well, that was better than my bard story, all he was good for was rolling nat 20s on all his bluff checks when the mob patrols found, 

    Bandit: “Halt, what are you doing out here”(three guys turn to face me, all alone)
    Me: and bluff, sweet nat 20 plus my ranks
    DM: and they fail their sense motive check
    Me: “I don’t know!” (being overly melodramatic, falling to my knees and crying) 
    and why did it work? because a wandering bard is not a stretch to the imagination, however it got worse when the dm gave us an npc ranger who followed us (mostly me) and I also simultaneously used a bluff check to signal him to move in for the kill…those poor red shirts never saw it coming

    Moral of the story, at some point, everyone needs to play a bard at least once

    Moral of Spoony’s story, don’t assume anything in D&D cannot kill you

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Chris-Bradshaw/100000539846890 Chris Bradshaw

    come sail away, come sail away, come sail away with me!

  • http://twitter.com/Lunne89 Daniel Ängehult

    Mother of god…

    THIS IS WHY I PLAY GAMES! :D

  • http://twitter.com/GA3050 Private

    I laughed until i was in tears, Tandem’s story truly is epic.
    Someone should probably novelize Tandem’s Last Ride or a movie of Spoony’s Wonderland Jihad.

  • Leena Hölttä

    Yes! Counter Monkey!!! :D I love the counter monkeys!!!
    And he he, Oreo, she’s so cute :D
    And that was pretty damn badass, beating a lvl 20 monk :D

  • http://twitter.com/JackfromPT João Monteiro

    So, you go to Wonderland, kill the Catterpillar, have an epic fight with the Mad Hatter and torch his tea party, ransack the Queen of Hearts castle and then fight off a Liche to get a boat that can magically transverse dimensons you can raid at will? I can smell movie epicness right there! Probably a freaking trilogy!

  • Matt Pank

    +1, spoony.  Enjoyed it a lot.

  • Anonymous

    Tomb of Horrors was my introduction to AD&D. I think I was around 11 or 12 at the time and was watching a bunch of older kids play it. Got invited to join and handed a character sheet. So with absolutely no idea what I was doing or how the rules work, I joined the party exploring the Tomb of Horrors. 

    So I walk into the opening corridor, poke my spear into a black portal and promptly dropped dead. The portal was a sphere of annihilation, instant death, no save. Welcome to D&D!

    I remember reading Castle Greyhawk, I think it was pure comedy. Not a serious adventure in any way.

    28:20 – It’s always a bad idea when the DM laughs.

    Nice ending, classic way to say goodbye to a character.

    • ORCACommander

      heheehe in my spycraft campaign our gm has no poker face so when he starts smiling and laughing we all start rolling the action dice

  • http://twitter.com/Jacobdeb Jacob de Boer

    Spoony, I’ve been a long time fan, but so far never commented on your video’s. I just have to right now, because this video is epic. It’s amazingly entertaining and I really rooted for Tandem the Spoony to overcome the horrors that were thrown at him.

    Also, perhaps a little belated: I know you’re in a rough spot now; take it easy and get well soon. We all love ya.

  • http://twitter.com/totem91 Totem of Low Bap

    “Counter-songing the motherfucker” is now copyrighted to you, sir…

  • crix.dorius

    Epic…!!!

    I really need to play DSA again!!! ^^

  • Anonymous

    Great story. Loved it.
    I know people keep saying we need animations for this stuff.
    Nuts to that. Someone make a game. :P

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

    I can imagine Spoony, wide eyed and shocked, soberly calculating how he can possibly match the razor sharp wit of the GIANT STONED CATERPILLAR!

    I’m only kidding, that caterpillar thing was absolutely sinister. The only way you could ever know he was using Hypnotism was to listen to the DM rolling dice. And that was a brilliant way to counter it: the description of Hypnotism involves a ‘droning incantation’, which means that the spell is phonetically based, so Countersong would work.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_SOSRS2NSCHLKYZVF4PHQM37BYQ ChrisW

    The Daleks used Countersong in one of their first episodes, ‘Dalek’s Master Plan’ I think or before it.  “I’m your servant!  I’m your servant!”

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_MCK6CIYZ2C55FES3NW4BAOTG4E Christina

    EPIC.

    When Spoony recounted the tale of the caterpillar, I actually stopped the video, started up Iron Maiden’s Fear of the Dark in the background, and when the metal part of the song began I went back to the point in Spoony’s story where his bard jumped up and started singing.

    “So Tandem the Spoony ascended to the heavens and sailed his spelljamming ship between the stars. And he saw strange new worlds and had many more adventures before he settled down.”

    “But that’s another story and shall be told another time.”

    THE END

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

    Just invented an awesome name for a female monk: Beatrix the Black Mamba.

    Yes, that is a reference to something else. Figure it out yourself.

    • ORCACommander

      Hmm i would share my ideas on this but its a bit to public :P

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

        If you guess correctly, you will win an Internet Point, redeemable at any car dealership or Chuck E. Cheez.

        • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_ICDHG7TLTN6JVK6JMK3TKQFXKQ Mike Wallace

          I’m guessing… Deadly Vipers Assassination Squad.

          • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

            Think Quinten Tarentino.

          • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_ICDHG7TLTN6JVK6JMK3TKQFXKQ Mike Wallace

            Just in time for Christmas.

  • ORCACommander

    glad to see you back to your tricks again. Hehe I make it a point to save my char sheets at every level. makes backl tracking easier that way. after all its easier to go up than down

  • Anonymous

    Best Counter Monkey yet. Great story, great twists, satisfying ending.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_YS5ELLPYKZNZ3SEFVP2A3XFHS4 Yu Jie Kairos Sato

    I’d love to play D&D with you Spoony. > w >

  • http://twitter.com/RiceMan93 Taylor Rice

    While I’ve read and know the ridiculous-ness of both ToH and CGH, I never knew about Dungeonland. I never knew why Gygax loved making impossible adventures…

    Also, something that bothered me: I do know 2nd Edition rules, and it has a system that allows for followers to be gained by specific classes; I wonder, were the requirements for the party memebers not met, or did Dungeonland/the DM actually restrict the use of followers?

    • E S

      Sounds like it wasn’t impossible going by his team’s success and awesome adventure experience that came out of it. But yeah Gygax had a few killer dungeons published.

      And you’re right. Most classes got followers at 10th aka Name level. Some classes had to build strongholds to attract them though and some specific kits also waived your rights to them I think.

  • CoHScrapper

    I miss playing D&D. I remember the first time I rolled up a MAGE. It was my 2nd D&D campaign and I wanted to try playing a mage, so I rolled an 18 on 3 D6′s, my friend sitting next to me (we call him “O.J.”) had NO IDEA that what I was playing, he just saw the 18 and immediately tells me, “Oh! Put that in your strength, that 18! Do it!”… so I do… Yes, a mage with an 18 Strength! And I shit you not, he had Intelligence of 8 and Dex of 12 -Again, OJ had NO IDEA what I was playing and the thought never crossed my mind to tell him. And again, 2nd campaign, I was just a kid, I thought I was getting solid advice on the character build lol.

    And for comic relief, I named him, I kid you not, “Keanu”. And when ever his name was said, it was said in a surfer/stoner tone. Everyone at the table got a chuckle or two out of that and it made for some interesting jokes…

    Any way, the adventure is about to start. The King calls forth “Champions” because his kingdom is in great peril, the end of the world draws nigh, blah-blah-blah.. The leader of our campaign is told to find these “Champions” at a tavern, so he goes, and he finds all the party members he needs- save for Keanu. I, being a mage, am attending a school of magic. And the look on OJ’s face when he finds out I was playing a mage was down-right hilarious! He immediately turns to me, gesturing to the DM, “WHOA-WHOA-WHOA! STOP-STOP-STOP-STOP-STOP! TIME OUT FOR A SEC!” He’s looking at me, “….are you SHITTING ME! You’re playing a fucking mage!”

    LOL The look of shear terror on my face, the other players snickering, oh, this set up was beautiful. I replied, “…um, yeah, I wanted to play a wizard or magic user this time, so I rolled up a mage. Why? What’s the problem?” OJ takes my character sheet and passes it around to everyone else and EVERYONE starts cracking up: “HOLY SHIT! A MAGE WITH AN 18 STRENGTH?!”

    LOL This is the exchange between OJ and I:
    Me: “You told me to put the 18 in his strength, so I did. I was only doing what you told me to! It’s your fault!”

    OJ: “Because I thought you rolled up a fighter, or a ranger. Had I known you were playing a wizard I would’ve told you to place that 18 in his intelligence. Jesus Christ! We have a Mage who’s strong as a bear but dumb as shit! I should slap you silly!”

    Our DM, his name is Mark, is laughing his ass off. Mark’s laughing at me and says, “Ya know what? Fuck it! Play him that way! Play Keanu as a big as shit, Conan/Schwarzenegger type motherfucker with a surfer/stoner accent. Play him as “Ted”…Keep him the way he is because this is too funny.”

    …After a few minutes of bitching, jokes, comments and what-not, the group has been complied and we make way to a dungeon. We investigate it, we come across a few orcs battling some (human sized) spiders in a room. As soon as they see us in the door way, they stop fighting each other and come charging at us. The door is slammed shut by the two other humans in our party and they’re using their bodies to hold it closed. Our leader says, “We can take them we just need a spot to make a stand, so while WE hold the door, YOU guys find a spot where we can do so.” Instantly Mark makes a roll and says, “You CAN hold the door closed long enough to do this, BUT…you’ll need one more person to help hold-”

    OJ: “Gee, I wonder who that might be!” *sigh* “Instead of getting ready to cast his spell, our mage has to help hold a fucking door closed!” *Stares menacingly at me*

    Me: “What?!” *snickers*

    Mark: “It doesn’t necessarily mean Keanu has to help hold-”

    OJ: “Oh, bullshit! He’s the only one in the group with an 18 strength!”

    Mark: “Well, in all fairness, you DID tell him-”

    *OJ grabs my character sheet* OJ: “You see this? I’m gonna shove it up your ass!” *grumbles* “…Fucking Mage with an 18 strength…are you shittin’ me?!”

    And there were other incidences throughout the course of the adventure where Keanu’s 18 strength was needed. And honestly, I think that was Mark’s way of poking that button which is called OJ’s “nerves”, just for laughs because Mark would say things like: “Well, you COULD do this or that, IF you had another STRONG person to help… That seems too heavy to move solo. Yeah, you’re gonna need help…” and OJ would respond in agitation, “…fucking mage…”. God, it was hilarious.

    Again, there were other things that occurred, but for now, there’s my short story about my lvl 5 Mage -with an 18 Strength- named Keanu. And yes, I was also given bonus exp for randomly saying “Whoa!” and “No way!” like Keanu Reeves as “Ted” from Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure.

    Take care, Spoony! Wish you the best!

  • http://twitter.com/Redbob86 Bob Walsh

    If I ever get around to finally playing an RPG, I’d like to name my character with a “the” as well.

    Greetings fellow travelers!  I am Mongo the Loyd!

  • jesternario

    Technically, Castle Greyhawk was written AFTER Gygax left, and is considered today to be one of the most insulting things that TSR could have done (admittedly, someone probably thought it was a good idea at the time).

  • Renaissance_nerd

    the AD&D version of Prismatic spay was fucking brutal. It got nerfed pretty bad in 3.5.

  • http://shadowdancersworldo.blip.tv/ Shadowdancer21b

    Holy crap.  We need someone to convert that to 3.5!

  • Anonymous

    Tandem needs to return in one of your vids, either majestically sailing through the sky or tragically crashing in!

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_MCK6CIYZ2C55FES3NW4BAOTG4E Christina

    I started playing D&D with AD&D 2nd Edition. I think I never played a bard in AD&D. I have, however, played a rogue/bard and a bard/rogue under d20 3.5 rules. I must say, I can see the intentions of the game designers behind the bard class, but it’s poorly executed. They tried to cram too many concepts into it (wandering minstrel? spellsinger? swashbuckler? loremaster?), ironically despite that making the class one of the weakest core classes in terms of actual useful abilities. Or because of it, because the class just cannot focus on what it wants to be, and ends up with a scattered handful of abilities. In D&D 3.5, if I want to play a Swashbuckler, I will play a Swashbuckler or a Duelist or a Factotum, not a bard. Heck, in 3.5, the Warlock can be built to make a better sneaky diplomat or fond of obscure arcane knowledge than the bard. Or the Archivist. Which is so sad.

    Oh don’t get me wrong, there is ONE type of adventure where playing a bard can rock (pardon the pun): In a city campaign. Somewhere, where you actually have a lot of NPCs to interact with that don’t try to kill you every five minutes, and where not every encounter can be solved by kicking in the door. In fact the point about city adventures is that the city guard will not look kindly on people throwing fireballs and walking around decked out in weaponry. But illusion and subtle enchantment spells can finally be useful.

    I found Countersong to be the ONLY decent and useful bardic music ability… that’s why it’s such a shame that one gets to use it so rarely. (see below) All the Inspire Courage stuff is nice at the first two levels or so, but very quickly other classes, especially the cleric and the Marshall (aka Warlord), will have spells and auras that are far better suited to boosting the group than the bard is. Which is kinda sad because group support is supposedly the main selling point of the bard class in 3E. And Countersong is actually the only reason to put ranks into a perform skill at all, because all the other lukewarm bardic music abilities don’t even need you to roll anything.

    Fascinate? It sucks, and sucks hard, both as a bardic performance ability and as the spell, because it (and all other charm/enchantment spells and effects that cause “fascination”, i.e. Enthrall, have one massive design flaw: They become immediately useless as soon as the target feels “threatened” in any way, or if someone draws a weapon, if someone else casts a spell (doesnt specify “on the target” or just spellcasting in general, or if it has to be an attack spell or just any spell, like a cantrip to clean your clothes), or if there is fighting going on nearby. And of course if someone actually attacks the target the effect is broken automatically anyway. So, basically, that’s all the time in a dungeon crawl. Which also means, the bard power Suggestion (which can only be used on a target after you have successfully fascinated said target) is f*cking useless, too.

    If you have a gamemaster, like I had, who simply declares that the mere *act* of a bard starting to sing (or play an instrument, hold a speech, dance, whatever your bard does to fuel his mojo) or singing to cast an enchantment spell means the target feels threatened, nay, the mere fact that you are there is enough to auto-cancel any fascination effect. (quote: “You are an adventurer in a dungeon, therefore, the orc automatically feels threatened by your mere presence.”) By that logic, no bard, sorcerer, wizard or other spellcaster can EVER cast spells like Fascinate, Hypnotism, or Enthrall, because the mere act of casting them would immediately cancel their intended effect automatically.

    Unless, maybe, if the caster can cast his spells silently (requires a metamagic talent, which ups the spell level slot without improving DC) and with no gestures (requires another metamagic talent), or behind the target’s back which is kinda useless if you have to look the target IN THE EYES or TALK to it in a language it can understand for the effect to work! Not to mention, a bard *has* to do his perform thing in place of the usual intoning-arcane-syllables-and-waving-hands stuff the wizard does.

    Apparently, in my GM’s world, all NPCs have the uncanny laserguided ability to know that a spell is being cast at them even if they have no spellcraft skill. What if I bluffed my victim and told the target, “Here, hold still, I’m casting a healing spell on you.”, how about that? No, of course not.

    However, I had the great fortune to create a bard/rogue when one of my DMs announced we would be playing the Castle Whiterock campaign module (for D&D 3.5). I had no clue beforehand what Castle Greyhawk was about, and that it is actually one of the few published modules where’s having a bard in the party is just as essential as having a cleric (you can do it without a cleric, as we did, but not without no bard and no cleric, trust me).
    [--SPOILERS -- SPOILERS -- SPOILERS -- SPOILERS -- SPOILERS -- SPOILERS --]
    Not only does Castle Whiterock have special magic items that can only be used by bards, it has TWO bard NPCs in it, and the writer of the module actually worked hard to cram as many creatures with sonic attacks and sonic mind-affecting powers into it that he could find, to give a bard a chance to put his Countersong music and silence spell to good use. It ranges from the obvious (i.e. banshee) to weird outlandish monsters that I’d had never even heard of before, as well as several monsters (i.e. detrachan) with damaging sonic attacks which alas cannot be negated by countersong but silence is your friend here.

  • Dan Cochran

    the tea party sounds like a fucking Tarantino movie xD

    • Anonymous

      This summer, Quentin Tarantino’s: Badass in Wonderland!

  • jesternario

    Funny thing about Dungeon Land, by the way. Gygax wrote it with the “hack first, question later” type of play in mind. He ran so many strange adventures with his group that the hack n slay attitude was their first response out of SHEER REFLEX to what he through at them. Dungeonland is TYPICAL of the weird crap he through at them.

  • Christian Kadelka

    This epic tale should be written down! As Christophen Walken would say to Spoony: This guy is unfuckingbelievable!

  • http://twitter.com/AdrenaLynnNYC Noneya

    I feel like a little kid listening to one of the epic adventures my mom would read to me as a kid. That run sounded practically like it was the ending book of a “Tandem the Spoony” saga, from the impossible odds to the feel-good, possible-return ending. If Tandem had to go, I don’t think there was ever a better way for him to do so. Besides, I could see him raising all kinds of hell in that ship, such as revisiting an old flame on Olympus…

  • Princess Stabbity

    That.. was all sorts of epic.

  • Anonymous

    “Countersong this motherfucker!” WIN.  I never heard of that being used before ever.

    “Spoony is all like, yeah this is a sword of whatever yell whatever before fighitng and it’ll be good” hahah

    “This mad hatter is futenwacking all over us” rofl

    “My 18th level bard beat this 20th level monk in a fair fight” That is indeed badass. Finest moment? Maybe!

    Bard vs Lich..

    This is an awesome story.

  • Anonymous

    Woa!  I was so into the story i actually felt joy for the characters. Imagining everything in my minds eye is so much fun ! I laughed at the cheshire cat encounter. xD
    .
    —-
    The only thing i wish is that you went into more details of the last fight. It kinda began then ended.
    ———————–

    Try to go more into the character way of acting instead of “fcking counter-song!”  kinda breaks the immersion, i’m sure tandem had a way of speaking that was unique to him.
    —–
    that is all , MORE COUNTER MONKEY PLS!
    .

  • http://twitter.com/for_zack for zack

    This was so epic, i actually got goosebumps. I wish i had such a good roleplaying group as you do.
    Please tell us more epic tales!

  • http://twitter.com/Left2DieTeam mitchell tromans

    So your bard basically turned into a time lord.

  • Renaissance_nerd

    Hahahah I can see Tandem pulling a jack Sparrow and after getting tossed off Olympus standing up staggering and saying “I deserved that”

  • Jared

    Spoony, i must say that was an amazing tale. Heck it was not even a tale…it was an epic…a legend, and i freaking loved it. To tell you and anyone else i originally though your character was going to die…but no he proceded to fight on and win. That tale is the most fitting use of the term “Last Ride”. I mean i have only played D&D once and it was awesome, I got to escape out of a second storie window and live…granted it was a one shot story, in a dennys, during a snowstorm…it was awesome. I can only imagine that your adventure was not only brutal as you said but fully amazing and made you and the people you were playing with feel awesome. Thank you for sharing that tale and i can not wait for the next one.

  • Anonymous

    Countersong’ing with IRON MAIDEN. 

    When they say “That’s so Metal”, this is one of the things they mean. 

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

      I would have gone with Cream’s ‘White Room’. But that’s me.

      • ORCACommander

        what about White Rabbit by Jefferson Airplane as a counter song? but ya white room works pretty well too

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_OPJRUMTHO3SNNNH4VO6FVASTLM HappyGuy

    playing these Table top rpgs are minature figures and map panels essential?
    or does the dm just describes the situation and players just tell the dm what they wanna do or where they wanna go?

    • Caio Marinho

      It’s basically the second option. Minis and maps are good, but not essential. One could argue that for D&D 4th ed. you would need them, because the rules are described in tiles and minis, but, really, all you need to play any RPG is some friends, some dice and a whole heap of imagination. =D

      It’s also good if the DM actually read the rules before hand, but you know how it is.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_OPJRUMTHO3SNNNH4VO6FVASTLM HappyGuy

      Just ordered Pathfinder core rule book from indigo for 35$!
      now i just need a set of dice and some people to play with ~
      yay~

    • ORCACommander

      not essential but certainly helpful. especially for things involving line of sight

  • http://twitter.com/Bolt_V3 Bolt Vanderhuge

    Spoony, you should bring Tandem the Spoony back… but as an NPC that the party encounters.

    They hear whispers in town that the local mystics have felt a powerful being is in the foothills and that no one dares go out for fear that it might be some sort of high level lich or the like. The party decides to investigate, of course. They make tons of preparations and march out loaded for war and crest a hill… to find a ship, sitting in field. They investigate and find a cargo net ladder and climb up to find a man sitting in a wooden poolside lounger, sipping a citrusy looking drink. The man spots the party and leaps to his feet, thrusts out a hand and grins. “Welcome, friends! I am Tandem the Spoony and this is my vessel! Tell me, good adventurers, what quest are you on? Seeking gold? Jewels? Enlightenment? Godhood? Let me tell you… that last one can be dangerous. Stay away from the daughters of Zeus. Heheh. I still feel that little incident on colder days.”

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

      Wait, Spoony still has booze left after all this time? I figured he would run out of food rations by now.

      • http://twitter.com/Bolt_V3 Bolt Vanderhuge

        No, Tandem the Spoony hasn’t seen any of the Twilight movies… so he has tons left.

        • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

          Yeah, but I would drink a screwdriver to CELEBRATE. If I wanted to remove traumatic memories of a pasty man-bitch using his teeth to break into a woman’s uterus through her abdomen, and pull out an abomination of science and magic, I would reach for the highest-proof thing in reach. Flavor is out of the question in this situation, I don’t have time.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

    You right, you memory is completely scattershot *ANYMORE*. So is your proofreading.

    That’s just me being a smartass, this is still awesome.

    • Anonymous

      “Anymore” is correct used in that fasion; perhaps not strictly according to the rules of grammar, but it’s local slang (I don’t know how widespread it is actually). Used in this context, it’s basically equivalent to “these days”. So what he’s saying is that his memory is scattershot these days.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

        Whatever, he’s close enough. Let’s not harp on the man for minor details. God knows he got enough minor details in this video to sterilize before he’s torn to shreds.

  • http://UnholyFireDragon.com Unholy Fire Dragon

    That sure sounded like one of the most memorable and intense experiences that a team of hard-core DnD players can go through. I enjoyed that story and I hope you have more of them to share.

  • http://twitter.com/Jigglysaint Tom Williams

    Don’t worry about getting the facts straight.  It was still an awesome story.  Of course it helped me that I read through the Dungeonland module so I knew just what kind of shit was going down.

    Also, if I ever watch Disney’s Alice in Wonderland again, I am going jump up and say “I counter-song the motherfucker” when the Caterpillar comes on screen.

    Actually that needs to be a new meme, especially if somebody posts a musical video response to a youtube video.

    • Anonymous

      Just like “Truty/Treaty”, I’m going to try to sneak the Counter-Song bit into situations whenever I can.  I’m sure I’ll get a lot of confused looks, but hey, it’ll just give me a chance to say “it’s an Elvish thing, you wouldn’t understand”. 

      • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_ICDHG7TLTN6JVK6JMK3TKQFXKQ Mike Wallace

        My girlfriend wanted me to listen to something girly last night and I counter-song’ed her with “Deadly Sinner” by 3 Inches of Blood. I would have told her it’s an elvish thing but she studies Tolkien’s elves as a hobby so that wouldn’t have worked.

        • Anonymous

          I just had my first Counter-Song opportunity. 

          Someone on a forum I go to tried to hit me with a link to the Wendy’s Hot Drinks song.  The very one Spoony got stuck into all of our heads. 

          so I Counter-Songed him with Fear of the Dark.  It was a golden opportunity!

          If anything needs a Counter-Song, it’s Hot Drinks!  As wonderful as that song is, I am in NO mood to have it stuck in my head right now! 

          I’m loving Counter-Song!  Oh man, what has Spoony started? 

          • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_ICDHG7TLTN6JVK6JMK3TKQFXKQ Mike Wallace

            I don’t know, but I think all counter-songs should be old school heavy metal. It’s the only way to be sure.

  • http://twitter.com/Darkarcheos Leonard

    Wow Spoony, that was an epic adventure indeed, One of these days I want to go to Dungeonland and enjoy the Insane world of mayhem. :3

  • http://twitter.com/SirHuggingtons Dre N.

    I’m no pro but let this be at least some video of Tandem’s last adventure .
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ERPT1EnHRmg

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

      Replace the ‘Tom and Jerry’ clip with something containing a rabbit. Spoony fought the March Hare, not the Doormouse. He posted an edit about this under the Counter monkey video.

      But other than that, awesome vid.

    • Anonymous

      I think I need a cigarette after that.  WHEW! 

      Like I said earlier, I’m a sucker for Iron Maiden! 

      And oddly, I did envision the Doormouse wearing a Bowler hat, so that was a pleasant coincidence, heh. 

  • Anonymous

    Dude, I don’t care if it was a mistake, that described battle with the 20th level monk door-mouse was freaking EPIC!

    Somebody make a cartoon of that NOW!

  • Anonymous

    Listening to The Caterpillar talk, it sounded like he was about to burst into song as if it were an episode of Charlie The Unicorn.  I was certain he was going to tell the party to relax and put a banana in their ears. 

    But the funny twist is that it was Spoony who broke into song, and saved the whole bunch, and very good choice of song I might add!  I kind of marked out and sang the song in my head.  What can I say, huge Maiden fan here.

    And I don’t care if Spoony “messed up the story”, the vivid mental image I had from the Doormouse fight had me laughing ’til I was short of breath!  That was the greatest, and just when I thought nothing would top the LARP-Explosion! 

    I’m going to have to draw out the Doormouse fight when I get back into an artistic mood again.  At least up to the Crane Kick (the mouse will be funnier than the Hare anyway). 

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_E3Q5SLA52ZOWMQ6M5ODSGUPKSE Edward

    That was awesome.  I know I have bitched about this series before but this is really good.  I want to here more adventures of Tandem the Spoony or anything else you’ve got in your roleplaying history.  And that fan video Dre N. was awesome.  Keep up the good work Spoony.

  • Iain Latham

    William the Wallace.

  • Tim Spiegler

    How to bring back Tandum at a lower level, make him his son, Tandum the Second.  It justifies the loss of levels and allows you to change aspects of him to fit a new role play.  And because he’s his son, he can still have similar character aspects to Tandum the Spoony.  This would also allow you to bring back the first Tandum at another time without the loss of level, maybe even make him part of a quest at some point, but still participate in the quest.

    Just one option there, he’s your character your free to do whatever you want with him.  Live it up!

    • ORCACommander

      or you know use epic level rule sets for characters beyond level 20 :P

  • Mateusz K.

    We used to call each other with the universal “you there…”

  • Anonymous

    Alright, now I’m going to go see Breaking Dawn, and as soon as Edward starts talking in that emotionless zombie-voice of his and all the girls in the cinema get that dopy look on their faces I’ll shout *FUCKING COUNTERSONG!* and start singing Fear of the Dark. Wish me luck.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jack-Donald/547723767 Jack Donald

      how did it go?

      • David

        He was attacked and eaten by the fangirls. Rest in peace

        • http://www.facebook.com/Daniel.Mercury Danilo De Simone

          He went with great honor. A minute of silence.

          • http://www.facebook.com/adam.barnes.585 Adam Barnes

            A minute? Fuck that, we have fangirls to wipe out and avenge him.

  • Ash Glasgow

    Who cares man? The story was hilarious anyway, so don’t beat yourself up over fudging a few details. 

  • Ash Glasgow

    Who cares man? The story was hilarious, so don’t beat yourself up over fudging a few details.

  • Antony Cannon

    Dear Spoony,
    That was a great story. I always wanted to know the origins of the Spoony bard.
    This series si great and I could listen to it for hours.
    If I had one wish, it would be that you pat the doggy more. I don’t have a dog and am living vicariously here! Please pat the doggy!

  • Anonymous

    I never got into the D&D type games. From watching other people play, I thought that bad DMs could ruin a game by making them too easy or too hard.  It sounds like this was the latter and lucky dice rolls saved you at the end.  Good DMs try to provide a challenge without making it impossible, but to me that makes the game Fantasy Adventure Craps.  Keep rolling sevens or elevens and you win; roll snake eyes and you lose. I’d rather play Triple Triad.

    Contrast that with FF2(or4), which way back in 1990 (I was 10) forced me into an unwinable state.  I saved right before fighting the three sisters (Magus Sisters?, idn the ones that did Delta Attack) and promptly died. A lot. I had saved myself into an unwinnable state and had to start the game all over again.  The threat of actual failure added to my experience and made it one of my favorite games.  Sadly, they removed the “spoony” line in the PS1 version, which is the only working version I have. But I do remember Tellah saying, “You spoony bard!”

    Nevertheless, I did enjoy the epic tale that you just told.  That said, I doubt you were able to nail one of the three virginal goddesses.  I think the goddess of WISDOM would have seen through your bardly BS. And Artemis would have never gone for a week bard. Aphrodite maybe, but she would have immediately returned to the sea to revirginalize (super ancient Greek douche) herself. Anyway, Aphrodite is a castrated penis so I hope you didn’t lose godhood to have some of that.

  • http://shadowdancersworldo.blip.tv/ Shadowdancer21b

    Also at Caslte Greyhawk is not-Chthulu (Giant mind-flayer with fake wings) and not-Doctor Who (Tom Baker as a gnome), guumi werebears and more!

  • mdj_dragone

    So, Spoony’s origin was an ex-demi-god, and current Spoony is the *ing Avatar.  When you do more end review story stuff, you should totally bring in a Spelljammer ship (or whatever) to join up with Angry Joes and Linkaras little orbiting armadas.

    • Greig Stock

      Heck yeah, I’m down with that idea. Spoony must have a Spelljammer ship.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

        Work that into his character. Linkara has a spaceship, Spoony has a Spelljammer ship.

        • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_ICDHG7TLTN6JVK6JMK3TKQFXKQ Mike Wallace

          I think I just geekgasmed a little.

    • Anonymous

      I support this idea. Give Spoony a Spelljammer ship.

  • http://twitter.com/SwedishBallsack Jonathan Andersson

    Aw, it doesn’t matter if you didn’t remember the types correctly. It was still a funny story.

  • E S

    It’s probably the greatest counter monkey story to date.
    A hazily remembered detail or two doesn’t change that.

  • the writer

    “Fucking countersong!” is going to be my battle-cry some day.

  • http://twitter.com/VictuzPL Wiktor Jankowiak

    Bah it’s not the vaguely remembered details of the story that matter, it’s the overall fond memory and a fun story of your iconic character that have the big impact on it.
    In all honesty I probably wouldn’t even remember what the adventure was called not even mentioning things such as what weapon I was using or what class/race was the opponent that nearly killed me.

    No need to be so sorry for something that is still awesome to listen to Spoony ;D

  • Anonymous

    Oh my god. I was already going to say that YAY I’ve wanted to hear the story of the Spoony bard FOREVER. But DAMN. I did NOT expect this level of epicness. Because that IS fucking epic. EPIC. I looooved it.

    It just made it all the better that this sort of “really happened”. It’s not like in a movie or a book where you tend to expect that the main character survives. I was on the fucking edge of my seat here. xD And it all made the relief and joy even better when Tandem survived after all. Because I was honestly nearly certain that he was going to die. In some epic way, probably, but die anyway.

    God, I might be the biggest dork ever, getting so excited about an RPG story… But… seriously, I think it’s just that I’m so used to guessing whatever is coming when I read or watch a story. It’s so different to listen to a story where you have no idea what’s going to happen (other than that it must be worth hearing or you wouldn’t be telling us.)

    But on the edits: what the… are you kidding? Who cares about a couple of mistakes! Yeah, I noticed the Thor-slip but I pretty much figured you meant Zeus since it’s obvious from the context. And Doormouse or March Hare, who the hell gives a shit. It wouldn’t have changed the story at all. The same with whether the adventure was modified or not. It’s still epic as hell and a great story.

    Honestly, though, don’t start blaming yourself, Noah! It’s the depression talking. Believe me, I know what I’m talking about, I went through all that. In a few years you’re going to look back and wonder how on earth you could have been so harsh towards yourself for such minor mistakes.

  • marabackman

    It doesn’t matter if you tell some facts wrong just because you don’t remember everything. What matters is how you tell the story. And in this case it was hilarious and awesome :D

  • http://twitter.com/KaylisDX Keegan Smith

    Dude, we don’t care if your story is super accurate. We just love hearing you ramble. It’s fun and funny! We love ya man! Your loyal fans. We’re not just gonna UP AND LEAVE because you told a story wrong. Odds are, we’re gonna watch this several times each regardless. :B *hug*

    Oh! Are you gonna do a review of The Muppets movie? It’s out on my birthday. TODAY. I’m so excited. I hope you do one! Anyway, hope to see some more stuff soon dude!

  • Anonymous

    I wouldn’t freak out about accuracies. By the way, you totally got me to try Kraken rum.

  • Anonymous

    I wouldn’t worry about the corrections, man. By the way, you totally got me to try Kraken black rum.

  • http://twitter.com/duneblythe Dune Blythe

    I don’t mind a few mistakes here and there, as long as you tell a good story.

  • Anonymous

    Ah, don’t feel too bad Spoony. Butchered or not, it was still a great story, and it was cool to hear about the famous Bard.

    Seriously though, don’t beat yourself up about it, it’s no big deal man.

  • dism

    Don’t worry man, anyone is going to have mistakes when telling an old story, in fact, that makes it MORE authentic.

  • doresh

    Every retelling of a legend has some errors. That’s how bards roll XD !

  • George Rayburn

    Now i will never forget your name, (not that i would have) final fantasy II (IV) is my favorite of the series. btw keep up all the amazing work.

  • Pawel Archipow

    Still a mighty fine story to me because minor specifics don’t really impact on the overall “feel” of the whole story.

  • Anonymous

    I really love this counter monkey series it’s hilarious

  • http://twitter.com/TheFinalBlink Daniel Newman

    I second that! Keep them coming, I dont care if you remember things wrong, you have me and my brother laughing so hard with these stories.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

    This reminds me of my first encounter in 4e D&D, which was the final battle in Crown of Neverwinter. Since I had hopped into the middle of the story, I knew little about what had happened in the ca. All I knew was I was battling a 

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_ZEPILIQOHC5YAP3TOJN4SYRVRM Dani

    Eh, who cares if some of it is remembered wrong. That’s an epic story for you. It doesn’t need to be 100% accurate as long as it’s entertaining and your stories always are.

  • Anonymous

    Still a legendary story, man!  I’ve been addicted to the Counter Monkey series since you started it.  You keep making them, and we’ll keep watching.  It’s great to have something to listen to while I’m rolling my cigarettes!

  • Anonymous

    Bah, it’s always gonna be the Doormouse to me now. Makes for a much better visual ^^

  • http://twitter.com/Jalunow Jalil Granges

    dude i have never played D&D or any other RPG but every story you tell is so amazing that i just wanna hear more !
    bye jal

  • Anonymous

    Now I feel discouraged to watch the video. Is remake possible?

    • Anonymous

      Nooooo, in my experience retakes are never quite as good. :< Some of the passion just goes away when you are forced to do it again, especially if you're feeling bad about getting stuff right and thinking too hard.

      Just watch the video as it is, the mistakes don't make a damn difference really. It's still a damn good story. So don't feel discouraged, there's no reason.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_CL5LGLTLDSGXW73WU7OFUXTGIA stephen

     I can actually picture Tandem being punished if you ever bring him back. Gotta imagine that there was some fallout from Zeus and the whole deflowering of the eternal virgin goddess of war. I can picture Heward tracking Tandem down to give him hell. I can picture it now. “Oh my f*****g ME! What is WRONG with you? What made you think that was a good idea, going to another Pantheon and starting s***? Do you realize what a mess you made? I leave for a few centuries and all you had to do was sit there for a bit but no, you can’t handle it. It’s boring. Do you know how many wanderers got LOST because of you? Do you even know what that means? It means they’re gone. They’re just gone. They wandered, got lost, and now they ain’t coming back. If you had just not answered their prayers things would have been fine but no, you left them without a guard sitting their to keep them from getting lost. Just for that, you’re gonna wander for eternity. Hope you like this Spelljammer because it’s your home now. You’re a demigod on this ship but as soon as you step off you’re mortal again. You want to die one day you’re gonna have to impress me. Now GET wandering!”

    As for your story I think the Doormouse is better as a monk. Forget throwing a wererat into the mix. Make him a monk. Sounds better that way. Make the March Hare a ranger and the Mad Hatter some sort of spell caster. Yeah… I’d have changed alot of things. You guys would have been really screwed with that total war policy. That would have doomed you at the end. :D

  • Jeremy Zitnik

    Personally I think I like these hardcore and ridiculous story lines, better than the straight up d&d adventures I’ve seen played. I mean you’re given a game with almost infinite possibilities and most people hardly ever do anything with it. Also the humor that comes from these sorts of modules is fantastic, I mean I laugh imagining a bunch of medieval dressed guys just trouncing into wonderland swords drawn. I especially enjoy you retellings.

  • Justin Keown

    Don’t beat yourself up. It was still a hilarious story. :D

  • Anonymous

    1) You will discover that your “problem” will cause loss of memory. It did for me and it’s one aspect of “the problem” that will change your life the most, as it has for me.

    2) I still enjoyed the story, the main elements were said and that, in itself was a great watch!

    3) Anyone know where i can see a copy of a module, just to read through it.

    4) For some reason, i had a party a week ago and asked my friend to bring D&D over but other people wanted to play so we had to make them characters. 2 hours later, we got lost in creating them, i fucked off to my drum set and I’m still dieing to play D&D. Anyone in the Vancouver B.C Area wanna play just chat me up!

    5) Spoony, (i think i speak on behalf of many of your fans) i don’t mind if you wish to remake this video. Don’t think of it as a waste of time. I’ve been a fan of your from very early on so by now, ill watch anything you put up, expect you taking a dump or watching paint dry.

    6) I hope you got more stories coming! I hope to have hard ass adventures one day. I like a challenge.

    7) Anything i forgot to say (due to the same situation spoony has) is thus discusses by this last comment. :)

    • Ryan Russell

      Why is problem in quotation marks? Does he not really have a problem? I thought he was suffering from depression which is a pretty serious problem and worthy of being quotation free.

      • http://www.wix.com/enveracomics/ecs/ Julian Moretti

        I’m sorry you took my comment in the wrong way. By using ” ” i meant to be discrete. I don’t want to be the one blabbering about anyone’s problems, its not polite. As such, i know very well the effects and definition of depression, for i too have it, before Noah did. From what i can tell it was due to the loss of a girl, which for any average human is a good enough reason to be depressed, but its situational depression and not uh, whats it called, Clinical depression. Again, i am getting my facts from what Noah has told us. For all i know, he has been depressed all his life and it only showed up now. His depression, (hopefully) will subside and he will continue to be the bright, smart and funny person he is. I hope this cleared some thing up.

        • Ryan Russell

          Ach no don’t apologise, I read it wrong and had had a couple of drinks last night otherwise I would have just stfu. I thought it was pretty public knowledge, I’m not a huge forum follower so if I know it must be pretty out there. Anyway peace and love and all that!

    • Edetha3

      about #5. what the hell are you talking about this is Spoony, he could find a way to make it hilarious

    • Anonymous

      1) I can confirm this too. It definitely causes memory problems. I’ve had this problem and a several of friends have had it too: one actually said it went so bad at one point that she couldn’t remember things that happened the day before. 

      It can also actually lower your IQ. Yes, depression can literally make you stupid. (Though as a positive note, both memory and IQ can pretty easily be restored once you get better so it’s not like it’s some sort of permanent damage.)

      • http://www.wix.com/enveracomics/ecs/ Julian Moretti

        I hope so, because my career at school depends on getting better. I went in all confident, got depressed, lost my girlfriend, grade suffered, lost my peers respect and had to be put on medical leave for obvious reasons.

        • Anonymous

          Ouch… Well, don’t worry. You can definitely still get better. Grades suffering is pretty much obviously going to happen when you’re depressed. Might not get your girlfriend or your peers’ respect back but… there’s always hope for things getting better. I’m not gonna lie, it’ll be a lot of work. But first you have to get healthy, of course, and stay healthy so don’t rush it. In my experience, one of the key things to surviving depression is the realization that you don’t have to confirm to the social norms about graduating “in time” or getting a degree in a couple of years.

          I pretty much had the same thing about going in all confident and excited but then getting depressed and having to take a leave. I was way too impatient and returned to school too early and ended up going down AGAIN. So I had four years of alternating between school, staying home and being in… I don’t actually know the English name for it but it was like daycare for mental health patients (basically one step above from being in a psychiatric hospital (which I got sent to at one point but they decided to put me to the daycare thing, where I’d already been once, instead)). Now I’m back studying and it’s going… okay. I’m both hopeful and worried at the same time. But for the first time in four years I have my motivation back so that’s good.

          Buuut about the IQ and memory thing, yeah, they can definitely improve, but you need motivation and hard work. I’d recommend actually like practicing with some brain excercises.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

      The best thing to do is to ignore it. That’s what I did.

      I’m not saying that’s easy, you have to remind yourself frequently that harping over your ‘problem’ isn’t helping you. Acknowledging is healthy the FIRST time, but then it gets obsessive. I had to break that to get better, and it may work for you.

  • Ryan Russell

    Man I love these things. I know nothing about D&D other than it’s nerdy RPG stuff and you role dice but these are really enjoyable. So I see no need for the massive apology you’ve posted underneith but I take it that is more for the hardcore D&D freaks who’ll have a massive hardcore rage-boner over your trivial mistakes.

    Great vid Spoony, thanks for sharing (although some ‘real’ content would be nice ;))

  • Christian Demmler

    Spoony, don’t impose too high standards on yourself – when it comes to retelling epic stories that happened years ago, it’s perfectly normal to tell a few details differently than they occurred. Those are complex dynamic situations in which you were personally involved both mentally
    and emotionally, which are actually the hardest things to remember in all
    accuracy, even though they feel much more alive to us than “boring” memories. It’s just very uncommon to have that kind of story scrutinized by a bunch of people who are just as intimately knowledgeable about the situation you are describing without having actually taken part in it, by reading the D&D adventure script.

  • wiliamsn

    It sounds like he turned the Jack in The Pulpit into the Caterpillar, and jacked up the levels on all the characters. Also, it looks like he added the Lich at the end specifically to try to kill off your characters, since this was your final adventure…

    Here’s a copy of the module, if you want to look through it…
    http://creaturecatalog.enworld.org/downloads/files/dungeonland.rtf

  • Samples Elliot

    Pfft, I don’t care what was accurate.  You’re still quite the raconteur, and I think I’ll watch the episode again.

  • http://twitter.com/Spokavriel Daniel Thomas Stack

    I think it is just as, if not more likely, that the module was modified in case the group wasn’t being entirely honest about if they read through the module before or not.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_MCK6CIYZ2C55FES3NW4BAOTG4E Christina

      I think it’s more likely the GM upped the deadliness factor because they were level 18 and it was supposed to be the characters’ Final Adventure.

      • http://twitter.com/Spokavriel Daniel Thomas Stack

        I meant that in opposition to remembering the module wrong. An altered play through might have been worked out by the DM in advance. Level aspect could have easily played a factor.

  • Nagneto Lives

    The origin of SPOONY

  • Callista Rowlett

    I’ve never had the chance to play DnD and don’t know how to play it at all.  I had no idea that such specific and creative stories could come out of it!  Now I’m kind of interested in learning, but it sounds really complicated – I don’t think I could ever really figure it out.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_MCK6CIYZ2C55FES3NW4BAOTG4E Christina

      Callista, there are dozens of different roleplaying game systems, with different rule systems and different settings, ranging from games focussed on tactical combat (D&D, Battletech) or playing mercenary teams (Milleniums End, Shadowrun, d20 Modern Spycraft) to  zany comedy (the famous Paranoia, Macho Women with Guns, and Plüsch Power & Plunder, a German RPG where you play sentient plushies who walk around hiding from the humans, much like in Toy Story).

      Some RPGs are set in fairly well known settings adapted from movies, TV and books (Star Wars, Babylon 5, Song of Ice and Fire, Call of Cthulhu, Lord of the Rings, Supernatural, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Doctor Who, Firefly, Dying Earth, Elric/Stormbringer, Discworld, etc.), others often go for psychological storytelling (i.e. Little Fears, a bizarre indie game about children facing the monsters under the bed and in the cupboard) or modern urban supernatural fantasy (the various gamelines from the World of Darkness RPG (i.e. Vampire, Werewolf, Changeling, Mage), Unknown Armies RPG, Alternity, X-Files) or splatterpunk horror (KULT, Lamentations of the Flame Princess).

      You can get stuff from fantasy genre (D&D, Midgard, Engel, Ars Magica, Warhammer, Arcane Codex, Warhammer Fantasy, Stormbringer) to Science Fiction (Star Trek, Star Wars) to scifi-with-fantasy-elements (Fading Suns, Alternity, Warhammer 40K), Superheroes (Heroes Unlimited, Marvel Superheroes), Pulp Action (Hollow Earth Expedition, Deadlands the Weird West, Savage Worlds) and Steam Punk (Castle Falkenstein, Victoriana, Space 1889, Iron Kingdoms), or mix of genres, like mixing Wild West with Fantasy (Deadlands Weird West again, or Werewolf:the Wild West, or Firefly).

      D&D alone has more than half a dozen or more world settings over the years. Others like i.e. GURPS just offer a generic system to basically play anything with and lots of background sourcebooks (from Conan the Barbarian sword and sorcery fantasy, to bunnies from Watership Down, to Horror, or superheroes, or high-tech space battles, or alien conspiracies, to historical settings like Ancient China or Rome, but you have to make up the stories yourself with GURPS, unless you use one of the pre-made setting adapted to the system like GURPS Discworld.)

  • http://twitter.com/ShanRos Shannon Rosser

    Tandem the God-layer!

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_MCK6CIYZ2C55FES3NW4BAOTG4E Christina

      Something every bard should aspire to.

  • http://twitter.com/iwpoe iwpoe

    Also, the thing in the dressing room in Castle Greyhawk is not Thor but the Tarrasque (which makes much more sense).

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_6V2JL7RMZ7EYWDDWRYC7BPG6KU david r

      Wait… how BIG is this dressing room again? Isn’t the Tarrasque about the size of a city?

      • Anonymous

        I haven’t played much D&D myself, but Wikipedia says it is 50 feet tall and 70 feet long

        • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_6V2JL7RMZ7EYWDDWRYC7BPG6KU david r

          Not quite that big then, but still… that’s one big ass dressing room

      • http://twitter.com/iwpoe iwpoe

        I didn’t write it, but at least it makes sense that the Tarrasque would kill you for entering its dressing room, as opposed to Thor, who should mainly be annoyed.

  • http://twitter.com/iwpoe iwpoe

    Great story and post anyway, Noah. I didn’t want a minor correction to make it sound like I didn’t have a good time. This is a great series.

  • Ashely Adams

    No worries man!  I still love the story, I never would have noticed if you haven’t mentioned anything (of course I’ve never DnDed but it doesn’t ruin my enjoyment!)  Your character sounds awesome and a sweet way to retire your character.  

    P.S. ZOMG OREO ALL THE PUPPY LOVE.

  • Alex Giordano

    Dude, I love your counter monkey segments! they are always a blast and very entertaining, and actually help me when I DM my games believe it or not. I would love to hear more about Tandem. His antics seems very awesome, and i’m sure you have more awesome stories about this guy. More please! :)

  • Makay Murray

    Funny as always, so funny in fact I dont even mind oreo. he/she makes it feel more like we are just sitting across the couch sharing a Kraken black rum with Noah. 

  • http://robrand.pip.verisignlabs.com/ Robrand

    You didn’t “ruin the fucking story”, Spoony! It was very entertaining, and it doesn’t change the fact that your character ended up in a fight with something far outclassing him. Who cares if it was the Doormouse or the March Hare! It still was a Bard getting massacred by a 20th level Monk but then prevailing.
    Besides, the whole confusing Zeus with Thor adds to the entertainment since, as you said so yourself, it was meant to be a hazy drunken memory of…something.

  • Spokojasne

    Athena got spooned!

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

      Oh GODS, were going to get another episode of ‘Spooning with Spoony’! HIT THE DECK!

      • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_ICDHG7TLTN6JVK6JMK3TKQFXKQ Mike Wallace

        “Okay, this time you get to take the form of a man and I’ll be the swan. Mm, yeah, transcendant. My favorite position is the missionary ’cause I’m all about spreadin’ the gospel. Don’t feel too bad; incest is perfectly natural among gods. What happens in the pantheon stays in the pantheon, baby.”

        • http://www.facebook.com/Tanakh0101 Brian Daege

          I’ve lost the ability to sleep because of this…

  • http://twitter.com/Watto_Saga Nate River

    THAT WAS THE GREATEST STORY EVER TOLD!!! 

  • Anonymous

    Don’t worry about the memory flop. Happens to the best of us. It was an awesome story. These are making me want to get into D&D.

  • Anonymous

    This story is heartwarming.  There’s nothing better than to have a glorious end to a character you’ve devoted so much of yourself to.  My hat’s off to you, Noah.

  • doresh

    “And it has been told that the Great Spoony will one day descend from the stars should the dreaded mouse retur…”

    “Don’t you mean hare?”

    “What?”

    “It was a hare, not a mouse!”

    “BURN THE HERETIC!”

    And thus, two churches of the Spoony were born.

  • Anonymous

    I’d suggest making these counter monkey stories into animations or something but, to be honest, I don’t think they can be made any better than they already are. You’re an awesome storyteller, Noah!

    These stories really make me want to give tabletop roleplaying another chance. My only experience was kind of a flop. But I think it was the wrong group and the wrong game for me.

  • http://twitter.com/AJRimmer5 AJRimmer

    ” We were on a rampage in Wonderland. We left nothing alive”

    That should be Spoony’s next t-shirt. I’d buy it.

  • http://twitter.com/V4VGnet V4VG.net

    It would have been funnier if the door mouse really was a high level monk, no one would suspect a mouse to put up a good fight!

    • Anonymous

      This is why I’m no longer allowed in Disney Land. 

      And for the record, that Mickey bastard fights dirty! 

  • http://twitter.com/yamina_chan yamina-chan

    This really was a great story. That is just how an epic adventure should go. Going through the toughest challenges ever, succed and at jurneys end take a last one into the sunset or in your case to the stars.
    This was earned. Luck, Skill and Knowledge lead to a fantastic victory.
    And it can be treasured forever. I really enjoyed listening to you telling this =D I always enjoy your storys but this one especially.
    Even if it was not perfectly remembered, the greatness and feeling are the same ^^

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_MCK6CIYZ2C55FES3NW4BAOTG4E Christina

      Both the march-hare and the doormouse are rodents, so it’s not like much of a difference. One’s suffering from narcolepsy, though.

      • http://twitter.com/Laccophilus Oskar Schröder

        Actually hares are lagomorphs, not a rodents. Also I see dormouse constantly misspelled here. It’s not even a mouse. The name likely is derived from the romance stem for sleep, like dormir in French.

  • Jürgen Wilke

    Epic!

    Also I think your misremembering is a blessing in disguise…..of a badass doormouse-monk!
    As I think the Way the Story was told the whole scenery turned out more entertaining then it might’ve been otherwise.

    So anyone trying to tell me otherwise, and that it was really the hare-monk tandem the spoony was fighting…- I’ll go:
    “COUNTERSONG!!!….Feeeear of the daaaark…….Fear of the DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARK!!!!:….”

    Great Story
    The Epic Bard’s Tale

    • doresh

      Am I the only one thinking of Phoenix Wright’s “OBJECTION!!” during this part of the story XD ?

  • Nicholas Gammache

    Memory flop or no the story was a good one. I only wish some of my group’s D&D campaigns could end like that, and less ‘everything is on fire’ or ‘world ended’.

    Keep up these counter monkey stories; they’re great videos!

  • http://www.youtube.com/egxtra John K. Spencer

    I’ll be honest: I’m not too familiar with tabletop gaming, but with tales like these, I’m beginning to see why people love these games so much.

    • Anonymous

      Yeah,  me neither.  I did play one game once with a group of friends mainly because the stories get very funny when you try to recite them.

  • Anonymous

    Someone on another website just tried to hit me with the Wendy’s Hot Drinks Songs.  So I used Counter-Song and gave him some Iron Maiden, and this got me thinking:

    I wonder if Counter-Song can be the Anti-Rickroll.  All it takes is any good song of one’s choice, and the Bardtastic (think Bombastic, only Spoonier) declaration of “COUNTER-SONG!  Fucking Counter-Song!”

    I think Spoony just created a monster.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

      It could be made into a monster, IF WE ALL WORK TOGETHER AS A TEAM!!!!

      Sorry, Pink Floyd song. Speaking of songs, I know the perfect song on which to end this last campaign. Led Zeppelin’s ’Ramble On’. No other song better fits this situation.

      • Anonymous

        Yeah, this is one monster I support making!  It’ll be like the 2nd Cousin to the Son of Insano. 

    • http://www.wix.com/enveracomics/ecs/ Julian Moretti

      IF ONLY THIS IDEA WERE TO SPREAD!
      “You’ve been anti-rick rolled bitches!”

      • Anonymous

        Not anti-rick rolled.

        Counter-Songed! 

        • http://www.wix.com/enveracomics/ecs/ Julian Moretti

          Ill pay you to make a Counter-Song .gif or a meme or whatever.

        • Operationmindcrime20

          How about counter-snoged? It sounds dirty and hilarious at the same time. :D You’d creep em out as well as insult them! :) Kefka would be proud… :D

  • League City Ballroom

    Mmm, counter monkey is fucking amazing.  With your story telling skills, you are practically a high level bard IRL.  I gotta admit, I watch a lot of shit from TGWTG but without a doubt, spoony is the only guy I’d care to know IRL.

    • Operationmindcrime20

      dude i wanna hang out and be best friends with spoony. He seems like the perfect kind of real man kinda guy. Dorky and relaxed when we need to be, but manly when he needs to be. Plus he’s totally a pothead. Or used to be. Or all his friends were at one time in his life and they rubbed off on him. Just look at him. He’s smart, deep, masculine, intellectual, nerdy and a gamer, and an all and all cool guy. Now I don’t agree with everything he does. He’s flaunted he watches porn a few times, but hey, friendship ain’t about accepting everything your friends do. It’s about accepting the whole person. Yeaah..it’d be totally awesome to hang out with spoony. He’d be the kind of guy I wouldn’t mind dying in a kilt next to. A BROTHER IF THERE WAS ONE!

      • Sajeh

        Not creepy at all

  • Anonymous

    My 3.5 D&D character. My friends and I went epic level. Our DM, a no holds barred kind of guy, cleverly put us up against enemies and monsters that gave us a challenge. Not only giving us insurmountable odds, but gave us actual role-playing opportunities! He ran us through 35 adventures total, each one important to the other. He gave us a reason for our characters to get together, and why we were picked to be the forces of good for our plane. We were picked by the avatars of the gods of good (a long list of names, all 3.5 D&D deities). Todd our DM told us a story about our characters, saying that they had the ability of gestalt leveling, and that was HUGE for us. He allowed races and classes that many DM/GM wouldn’t allow on their death beds. The first adventure was our characters trying to get to the avatar’s island, the forces of evil tried to stop us and Todd put us up against creatures we couldn’t hurt. He kept saying does anyone have Diplomacy? As many of the party raised their swords and said, “Got that right here!” I did, I actually had the skill. I was level one fighter and half-elf paragon. I asked about this serpent, not to the DM, but to the cleric, who said that this sea serpent was some lawful good creature that can speak. So, I went up to it’s head at the bow of the ship unarmed and asked, “Why are you attacking us, for our cause is just!” It stopped attacking and looked toward the guy who cast a charm on it and chased him. When we got in over our head, I usually was quick enough to figure a role-playing non-combative way out it. The one adventure I missed the whole party died, but the Ninja. Cause she ran out when party member after party member was slaughtered in front of her. We got these talismans that gave us powers and abilities as well. We played this game 3 to 2 times a month over a period of 2 years. And a few times we extended the time from 5 hours to 10 on some nights, cause we were just having too much fun. We reached epic levels through a in game cheat of sorts. We hit level 20, and we found one of our party members gained 3 wishes from a lamp that summoned a Greater Djinn (The Djinn didn’t actually live in the lamp, it was the tool to summon him) and another found the deck of many things. I was neither of those, but what I did get that adventure more than made up for it, one ring with one wish on it. Which came in handy, to wish us back in time to a point before we made any wishes or used the deck of many things, which the DM allowed, since it made sense and we were 2 adventures away from ending the campaign. So, through wishes and NPC means, we created a extra planar space that was half the size of the Moon. In this space time flowed 2 weeks, 4 days, 36 hours, and 51 minutes for every one actual day that occurred outside the space. We adjusted the time to be an even 3 weeks per 1 day. So, we looked up the rules on training and such. We got up to level 34 on both sides of our gestalts. I was Level 34 Fighter on one side and the other was: Level 1 Psychic Warrior, 3 levels Barbarian, 3 levels half-elf paragon, 3 levels human paragon, 5 levels Outcast Champion, and 19 levels Dervish. And I was able to land the death blows on the main baddie as well take out the two henchmen he had. Through out the whole campaign we have never battled anything that we could score a crit on, even if we were able, they would be immune to crits, like undead, golems, and intangible types. As well as me being the first one hit and the only one to be hit in every adventure, to near death. So, my chic had a lot of pent up aggression against this main baddie. Our one friend from the start made a crit ranger, and was strongly advised against going that route, by not only us, but the DM. He thought he would find something he could crit against. I joked, yeah, US! He never attacked us, cause we out damaged him. It was the best adventure as a group we ever had, and the last epic adventure our friend ran, for a month later he joined the Navy. When ever we talk about great games we talk about this one first.

    • http://twitter.com/KaijuZ Emil Petrunov

      Holy shit! So you guys made the Hyperbolic Time Chamber?!

  • HuneyMunster

    I would have counter song with The Who ” We Wont Get Fooled Again”.  With Pete Townsend doing windmills on his guitar, Keith Moon drumming away like a mad man, Roger Daltry swinging his mic around and John Entwistle cooly playing his bass.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_MCK6CIYZ2C55FES3NW4BAOTG4E Christina

    Re: the misremembering a few details

    Oh but Spoony, that is how all folklore and myth starts. :-)
    As the past turns into hazy memory, of great deeds, of love lost and lovers won, the bards spin their tales and all those memories stand out like distant spires and mountain tops from the mists. The details may be hazy, but it doesn’t make them untrue. If we all had perfect memory, historians would have a much easier job (although people would still disagree over interpretations). But that is not how myths are wrought. Names change, things get attributed to someone else, heroes met in a tavern or on a battlefield although they lived centuries or lands apart. Folk songs gain new verses. But the story goes on.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_MCK6CIYZ2C55FES3NW4BAOTG4E Christina

    And technically, Zeus is just Thor, or Jahwe, or any God of lightning and thunder, with a different hat.

    Although Thor never was Father of the God… he was too drunk most of the time, at least when you go by the Thor from the Edda… the boisterous oaf with a big red beard who went on vacation beating up giants while Loki Firebringer, Loki Lie-Smith was at home bedding Thor’s wife Sif with his… cunning tongue. All the other gods’ wives, really, if you belive the Lokasenna ballad. *cough*

    • Anonymous

      Yeah, that’s a very good point. x) They are all like different versions of the same basic idea. (Which would seem to point to the direction that all these mythologies are more or less derived from some sort of “original religion” which has just been evolving differently in different cultures.) And I love it how you mentioned Yahweh too… since it does seem like he was originally a god of sky and thunder before Judaism evolved into the current, strictly monotheistic form (which, by the way, is a very interesting development). In general it seems like there are a lot of old religions centered around a head god of either sky, thunder or sun (with a some exceptions and local variants of course).

      • doresh

        I think I know why it is that way: Most religions believed that their gods live somewhere far above them, and what’s the one thing the sky can do to scare the living bajeezus out of people? Thunder and lightning!

        • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_6V2JL7RMZ7EYWDDWRYC7BPG6KU david r

          Look, can we just admit they’re all variations of Gork and Mork?

          • Anonymous

            I can… unfortunately a lot of people would rather go on killing each other over them.

          • Operationmindcrime20

            Which is ironic since most of the said Gods prohibit such action.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

        I don’t think that the tenets of Judeo-Christian gods would gel well with The Greek Olympian Gods. The whole ‘multiple gods’ thing would throw off most Jews, Christians, and Muslims.

        The amount of revision and homogenization inflicted on all participating religions makes the ‘coexist’ option destructive and infeasible. Isn’t trying to compromise ALL religions into ONE religion just as bad as destroying all but one way of thought? Like it or not, we do have to preserve every way of thinking, which can only be done by not caring what other people believe (unless they infringe upon you, then it’s self-defense).

        We all just have to agree to disagree without compromising our own beliefs.

  • xeilith
  • xeilith

    I hope you don’t mind but i made a simple caricature of Tandem based on the mental image i got from watching this.

    (It’s not very good)
    http://themarkofxanix.deviantart.com/#/d4h80bi

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

      He looks like the Red Mage from the first Final Fantasy.

      • xeilith

        Thank you for noticing.

  • Anonymous

    C’mon man, don’t beat yourself up over it. So you got a few details wrong about a fantasy story your friends made up about warriors slaughtering everything in Wonderland. Doesn’t reeeeeally matter…

  • http://twitter.com/Sjuge Andreas Lundh

    Those are just minor details, Noah. I thoroughly enjoyed that story, as I have all the Counter Monkey stories so far. 

  • erik skold

    I love these Counter Monkey’s, they’re always fun.

    You know Spoony, you could always do a commentary for this video with a revised retelling of the story, I know I’d watch that;)

  • http://twitter.com/Vesiru Minna

    I really love the Counter Monkey stories, I’m amazed that you remember all the details you do. I tend to forget almost everything as soon as I put the dice away after an adventure. Mind like a sieve, I have.

    Did the details really matter that much? I think it is good that the corrections are in the post so people who have played the Dungeonland adventures know that someone already has pointed them out. It’s a really entertaining story, I love the twisted Wonderland.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_ULUK3HNFCHM6ZAJOVACZ3YQDZA Hathor Liderc

    Since you’ve been DMing a lot, have you ever thought about using Tandem as a ‘mentor’ character to the party?

  • Anonymous

    I think Spoony and Oreo staring at the camera while Spoon says, “We are done with Wonderland” is my all-time favourite Spoony moment.

    • Anonymous

      . a magic moment indeed xD

    • http://twitter.com/vaftss2 Alexander Biezenski
      • Anonymous

        Nice! That’s awesome. :)

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

        Brilliant. I want this on a t-shirt.

    • Anonymous

      It really needs to be a christmas card.

      “Christmas Wishes from the Burning Ruins of Wonderland, Spoony & Oreo”

  • http://twitter.com/kinofrost Chris

    “My name is fucking MOONBEAM” on a t-shirt anyone?

  • ORCACommander

    fore those interested in the dungeonland module here it is

    http://www.gamefront.com/files/?filepath=bloodreign/ADD1st-9072-EX1-Dungeonland.pdf

    mad hatter and the the other tea party chars are on page 20.

    gota say this booklet is as unfriendly as hell to read.
    if i am interpreting the strings of numbers right the hare is at lvl 9 so ya spoony your dm really tweaked it.

  • adamsr

    Yeah, your DM was improvising like crazy.  The caterpillar is evil, but there’s nothing in the module about him turning characters True Neutral.  The Mad Hatter and March Hare are 9th-level monks.  The Hatter’s hats have random, relatively harmless effects, like making a character dance uncontrollably; nothing about mind control, and the Tea Party isn’t hostile unless the party attack first.

  • Brian Watson

    Please tell me you have more stories.

  • adamsr

    Here in the UK, by the way, if you call someone “spoony”, it means they’re really lucky, with the implication that you’re jealous.  “I found a £20 note on the pavement yesterday.”  “You spoony bastard!”

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

    Roll a character? I just use the point-buy system. I think actually rolling new characters is discouraged, because of the element of luck. The Essentials books actually offer popular point-buy numbers for newer characters to use.

    • doresh

      Well, ability scores in the pre-3e-editions didn’t really give you any bonus unless you have some extreme scores (16+ if I remember correctly), so rolling a character wasn’t all that bad.

    • ORCACommander

      honestly i find i get better rounded characters with rolls than point buy.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

        I am starting on 4e, and used point-buy to make a character fast. I couldn’t find a reliable source of 3.5e, so I going to sell out to guarantee that I will be able to play D&D at all.

        Yes, I realize that 4e focuses too much on combat, and character customization is almost nonexistent (compensated by the sheer amount of different classes to choose from), and nothing from the previous versions is backwards compatible with 4e, and playing this will make immersing myself in other tabletop RPGs difficult. Unfortunately, 4e is all anyone plays because it’s the only new content that the Wizards of the Coast put out. I can’t find any RGPA sanctioned games of 3.5e, so I’ll take what I can get.

        • Anonymous

          I’ll be honest, roleplaying isn’t supposed to be codified in game mechanics. It’s supposed to be the people you interact with. If you’re not getting much mileage out of Bluff and Intimidate, tell the GM to stop focusing on combat so damn much. I run a 4E game with my friends and we do pretty well. I tend to focus on tailoring my adventures to the players, either doing the stories based around them or finding ways to incorporate their goals into the overall storyline.

          I’ve always found the “4E kills roleplay” camp to be kinda bullshit. That’s just an attempt to excuse shitty DMs. I’d say it’s more 4E makes things easy for noob DMs to get started, and without experience, noob DMs will just toss encounter after encounter at you.

          • ORCACommander

            not always the dm’s fault a lot of players just want to hack and slash their way through the campaign. me personaly i admit i like to kill shit but i will always be creative and my first instinct is not to shoot first ask question letter. played a dark sun 4.0 campaign, designed to get people interested in rping build up some basic skills, last year and ran up against an id fiend i bound it with magical bonds of fire and subdued it to my will. this made our dm come up with a whole sub plot where the id fiend is really a polymorphed exiled monarch and in our adventure would only obey my commands and most of the time sat around on his ass.

          • doresh

            True, you can roleplay with pretty much any system (even Hero Quest!). But completely removing out-of-combat abilities of the monsters combined with the severe lack of fluff didn’t make this particularly easy. In older editions of D&D (as well as Pathfinder), it was this non-combat stuff with which you can integrate monsters into your adventures.

          • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

            That’s one thing I like about 4e, it’s REALLY easy to get into, for players and DMs. My problem is that our DM works for the RGPA, and has to operate by store hours, which end at 9pm. So he often has to rush the game, and doesn’t have a lot of time for roleplaying. But that’s MY problem, not the game.

        • ORCACommander

          i would say role playing in across all formats has been taking a backseat to roll playing for a few years now. its easier on the dm and the players love to kill shit and also makes things less complex for them.  its a shame the people you know are not like who love to read over the material of any system i can get their hands on. shoot me a pm on the forums if you would like to peruse some pathfinder material or spycraft2.0.

  • Anonymous

    “Never let a few facts stand in the way of a good story.” I stole it from a plaque

  • Anonymous

    Ah well. Even if a few names came out wrong, it’s still a great story!

  • http://www.wix.com/enveracomics/ecs/ Julian Moretti

    http://scarlettopia.com/about/

    Is this Spoon’s ex?

    • ORCACommander

      resembles her forum avatar

      • http://www.wix.com/enveracomics/ecs/ Julian Moretti

        the bitch…… -_-

        SPOONY POWER EVERYONE!!!!

        • Anonymous

           Isn’t “bitch” a bit harsh?

          • http://www.wix.com/enveracomics/ecs/ Julian Moretti

            i guess, but from what i read, she left him for the stupid reasons mine left me, so…..yeah. bitch.

          • http://www.youtube.com/thefaustianman Faust

            Yep. That’s her. Why’d she leave him? And you’re better off long run. Trust me. I know it sucks, but it’s like having shitty friends. You get rid of them, then you’re friendless…but then you make new and better friends. Life works like that.

  • Anonymous

    Don’t beat yourself up over the nitpicky things Spoony, nothing got runed. This Counter Monkey was the best yet and getting small things like fighting the March Hare instead of the Doormouse mixed up doesn’t take away from the essence of the story. It wasn’t scripted and I’m guessing this story is from a good few years ago.

    I laugh so hard at this vid every time I watch it XD Awesome.

    • http://twitter.com/Forceprincess Shauna Force

      I agree! It was a very entertaining tale, to say the least!!!

  • Anonymous

    As long as you weren’t banging Artemis, things should be fine. Athena was never married in the myths (though Haephestus did try to have a go at her), but she wasn’t a militant virgin the way Artemis was. If you boned her, that would have opened up a can of worms. The last guy that got close like that ended up with Apollo directly or indirectly causing his death.

    I like the parallel with Haephestus though.

  • Anonymous

    Counter Monkey series just keeps getting better and better, I love this site!

  • http://twitter.com/Mafon2 Petr Matafonov

    few more vids and i’m gona start the search of DM… sry 4 doubleposting…

  • http://twitter.com/Mafon2 Petr Matafonov

    few more vids like that and i’m gona start the search for DM

  • Anonymous

    Oh Spoony don’t beat yourself up over the little mistakes, this was a hilarious story none the less and I always look forward to your counter Monkey tales. Take care of yourself and take it easy, Your videos are so good i never mind waiting longer to see them~

  • http://shadowdancersworldo.blip.tv/ Shadowdancer21b

    Countersong even works on the breathweapon of emerald dragons, which is a sonic attack.

  • Anonymous

    I’m with the other guys here – so you got a few details wrong. No big. It was still an excellent story. So long as you’re not outright fabricating stuff (and even then…), it’s all good, oh Spoony One. Especially for an unscripted story, that one was both amazing and very well told.

    And Oreo seems to be learning to behave :)

  • wiegeabo kilijabob

    Four days and I’m already getting the shakes.  I need another Counter Monkey fix.

    I’ve already watched the Counter Song story 3 times!

  • Anonymous

    This video is 40 mins long yet it felt like mere minutes passed by as we all watched it. He’s enchanting us!

    I CAST COUNTER SONG!

    NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP
    NEVER GONNA LET YOU DOWN
    NEVER GONNA TURN AROUND AND DESERT YOU
    But seriously Spoony we love you. Keep up the great work!

  • Jan Itor

    Okay this has nothing to do with the video but i need to ask this:
    Why has nobody informed me that there’s a new movie with Reb Brown in it coming up, in which he fights Bigfoot!?
    No not the monster truck, this thing: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7g8n1Yp49wM

    • wiegeabo kilijabob

      Holy Flarking Shnit!

      Well…Big Foot is fucked.  He picked the wrong guy to mess with.

  • Anonymous

    Hey Spoony, if you like to play D&D P&P online with the best visuals and modules please visit this website:

    http://www.fantasygrounds.com
    This is the best D&D software EVER! You can play with almost all known games, modules and campaigns from D&D 3.5ED to Pathfinder!

    Then tape your game and post the results here, you won’t regret it! :)

    • doresh

      Actually, Spoony DMed over at LordKat’s site, where they did exactly that. He also played as a PC in at least one campaign at LordKat’s and in a 2e campaign of IronLizzy (sadly audio-only). They use OpenRPG for the most time.

      As for me, I prefer MapTools. It’s free just like OpenRPG, but overall easier to install, newer and more stable.

      • ORCACommander

        now if only those softwares had decent instruction manuals :P and maptools has downright draconian version enforcement rules.

        • doresh

          Maptools has both a tutorial wiki AND an entire site for video tutorials :P

          I presume the version enforcement helps with stability. It’s also not THAT big of a deal IMO since since Maptools doesn’t need installations ^^

          • ORCACommander

            mmm those weren’t around when i looked into it.

            but it was just annoying because subversion after subversion it was just a pain in the ass to make sure everyone had the same copy.

          • doresh

            Well, Maptools not all that big, so sharing one version with everyone shouldn’t be too hard. And you don’t HAVE to update your Maptool every single time if your fine with the current one, after all ;)

          • ORCACommander

            hush you :P

          • doresh

            Countersong :P !

  • Anonymous

    Or possibly spoony and his crew just stunk 

  • http://twitter.com/Forceprincess Shauna Force

    What happens on Olympus stays on Olympus?

  • http://twitter.com/sudburymagician James Thomas

    I have NO idea why, but that line…
    “My name is fucking Moonbeam!”  seriously cracks me up

    • doresh

      dito XD

  • http://twitter.com/Necroscourge Robert Cousineau

    A image needed to be made of COUNTERSONG!
    http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/444/countersong.jpg/

    • doresh

      I would’ve chosen Rebecca Black, put it’s awesome nonetheless ;)

      • http://twitter.com/Notsuchabadguy Edgar

        Wish granted http://twitpic.com/7kx9sy

        • doresh

          Yaaay XD !

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/George-Rosenbaum/100001387887487 George Rosenbaum

      Let’s meme this bitch UP!

    • http://www.youtube.com/thefaustianman Faust

      I lol’d.

  • http://twincannon.myopenid.com/ twincannon

    Great story Spoony, doesn’t really matter that you got the classes wrong for me since I wasn’t familiar with the module anyway! Love this series btw, hope you have lots more. :)

  • http://twitter.com/MadifyMarley Madify Marley

    Oh, this was hilarious. It makes me wanna DM or play DnD… never done it before… not sure i’d be any good.

  • http://twitter.com/thefallenface Bryan Tiggelaar

    Of all the amazing things Spoony has done, this may be the most amazing. Seriously, this Counter Monkey series is comedy gold. I wish I had some kick-ass stories about role playing to tell. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must listen to the epic tale of Vegan Steve again. Farewell.

  • Anonymous

    I was inspired to read the module after watching this.

    Two comments:

    1. Your DM was cruel. According to what I read the boat is a free trip home. No more fights from that point.

    2. This module does not take into the account how people react to stimuli. After dealing with only 1 or 2 dark interpretations of classic Wonderland characters will the party cease being amused. The storyline seems to suggest the party will keep playing along with this b/s even as they are constantly F-ed in the ass by it all. I think most parties would decide after the Mad Hatter that everything dies on sight. If you want players to interact with content you can’t have EVERYTHING TRY TO KILL THEM! Or else they’ll respond in same.

    • doresh

      It seems that it would’ve made more sense if only SOME (preferrably randomly determined) of the Wonderland creatures would try to murder the party. This keeps the players guessing (fitting for such a batshit-crazy world) AND provides them with potential allies.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jeffery-Adam-Phillips/842790540 Jeffery Adam Phillips

    I’d love to read a novelization of this. Seriously, this shit makes Alice seem tame at times. lol

    • Anonymous

      Or better yet, a video game.  I can see it now: American McGee’s “Spoony”.

      “Here’s a Riddle: When is a croquet mallet like a billy club?  I’ll tell you: ANY time you WANT it to be, you rat mother fucker!”

      And then one of the most bizarre, yet ferocious boss battles ensues. 

  • Anonymous

    Great story, Spoony, factual errors or not. And besides, looking at what you told us here and comparing it to the Dungeonland module as written, your DM MASSIVELY overhauled that module to make it work for a 18-20 level party, so what you said here could very well be EXACTLY what happened. Either way, it’s an entertaining story!

    I really love these Counter Monkey videos. They’re rapidly rekindling my interest in tabletop roleplaying. Life interfered for a while, but I’m gonna try and get some of the group back together and start a campaign. I think it’ll be a lot of fun. Who knows, maybe one day I’ll have my own awesome counter monkey stories to tell.

  • Anonymous

    honestly this makes me want to bring my character Shard into Dungeonland to see how he fairs, he’s a drow elf rogue who to put it bluntly could match wits with the Joker. he’s bat shit insane but hilarious.

  • http://www.youtube.com/thefaustianman Faust

    Does anyone else think that the Simon the Sorcerer ad looks like Spoony…and well…an older Spoony?

  • Anonymous

    honestly this makes me want to bring my character Shard into Dungeonland to see how he fairs, he’s a drow elf rogue who to put it bluntly could match wits with the Joker. he’s bat shit insane but hilarious.

  • Darke Mayer Goulart

    You spoony bard, how dare you to ruin the story about a bunch of nerds having a silly good time? That’s BETRAYAL!!! BETRAYAL, I tell you.

    The only thing you can do to redeem yourself now is get on a time machine, watch Breaking Dawn part 2 and come back to tell us how the Twilight Saga ends. Now, go!

  • http://www.facebook.com/jbhaslach John Barton Haslach

    How dare you forget something that happend years ago. Internet law requires you to die horribly. Seriously though, its ok. It was a good story and I liked it. Can’t wait until FF-X2 part 3. In the words of Jean-Luc Picard: Make it so.

  • wiegeabo kilijabob

    Spoony, you should take some of the shorter Counter Monkey stories, like Counter Song, cut them into their own small videos with a brief intro card, and see if Nash will play them on his show.

    Great stories for potential new Spoony fans to watch, and promotion for your Counter Monkey website.

  • Anonymous

    To hell with accuracy if you can make people laugh this much :D At least i was laughing during this entire story, and im not picky enough to complain about misremembered facts, since its not like memory is omnipotential databank.

  • http://twitter.com/xMaeRx Ryan Beckmann

    History is written by the victors. Sounds accurate to me.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_JVA23FBQ7TXHZI27UX7OAMYAFA Tyler

    Spoony, you can just make up any story, and it will still bring us plenty of joy. :)
    Maybe you should. That way you can make a whole lot of awesomeness without the constraints of “facts” for the take of our entertainment. Be more like the news media.

    • Anonymous

      haha

      never let “facts” get in the way of a good story
      ;)

  • http://twitter.com/Punky_neko_chan Borislav

    i love thous story videos so interesting ^__^ 

  • http://boorat.deviantart.com/#/d4c9c3t William “BooRat” Blackshire

    Funny great story! Even with the mistakes you mentioned in the comments below it!
    Sounds like it’d been a fun story!
    That Greyhawk sounds like something they’d made into a movie back in the 70s or 80s if they had the money!
    Wererats sound aweome!

  • http://shadowdancersworldo.blip.tv/ Shadowdancer21b

    The alignment change thing was a plant creature called the Jack-in-the-Pulpit.  He calls for help if you try to leave or save vs his mind control.

    • http://shadowdancersworldo.blip.tv/ Shadowdancer21b

      the caterpillar was a behir in disguise and his smoke rings are random spells.

  • Chris Mudd

    The “mistakes” didn’t take away from the story, dude. The important elements were there. I do understand the annoyances of missing details.
    Did you want people to submit Counter Monkey stories by the way?

  • Tobias

    I didn’t expect to be the first one to come up with a Wonderland based campaign idea, but that there was actually one written by none less than Gary Gygax does come as a surprise.

    Ah well I can still take pride in the fact that my basic concept is still a lot different.

  • http://twitter.com/MovingTreeInc Austan Skidmore

    March Hare, Door Mouse, dude you’re a freakin’ bard, tell it how you want. Personally, I thought the door mouse was funnier. We all knew you meant Zues when you said Thor, and either way imagining you fight either is still hilarious. Wonderland’s only 9-12? Screw that mess! Wonderland’s freakin’ scary as hell for being level 12! Whatever man, you had fun telling, I had fun listening, and that’s all that matters.

  • wiliamsn

    Spoony…

    Don’t think for a second that you in any way ruined this tale. You may have possibly got a few minor details mixed up. Details that all said and done are not that important to the overall narrative and point of the story…

    I’m frankly impressed that you remember so many of these stories and can talk about them at great length as though they just happened the other day. Your memory is formidable and you are a great orator. It’s no wonder you played a bard…

    The worst thing you could do is hold back on a story because you’re afraid you may misremember a couple of things. This is a phenomenal tale. There are things in this video that are worthy of memes (I’m looking at you ‘countersong’ and ‘my name is fucking moonbeam’)

    Everyone makes mistakes. Except the Pope. He’s inflatable… (see, I just made one)
    If you make a few mistakes here and there, I mean, we’ll point them out…
    Because… Information!!!

    But it’s not a big deal by any stretch of the imagination…

  • bugsy noname

    man spoony  awesome story  

  • Anonymous

    lol.. your look like your drunk on the image before you play the video. like ‘ Yeah, this is my dog. You gotta problem with that!?!? huh!!!?’  good review i have several nice dnd memories also, good times.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_O4PXH6ETN4BCQKYKTCE36FVRZI Tony

    Thanks for the story, Spoony. I read your description, so you don’t have to worry about getting one or two things wrong, bud.

  • Anonymous

    Not sure if other people have said this but I love the moment when you went “a 20th level MONK!” *squeaky toy*. Like Oreo was excited too,

    • http://sbkmulletman.deviantart.com/ sbkMulletMan

      It was a well-timed “Oh no!” moment to me.  The Squeak of Despair! 

  • http://twitter.com/jjflash572 Chris Kowaleski

    Never let the facts get in the way of telling a good story!

    I love these counter monkey posts, but they make me miss RPGs that much more.

  • Mounrou SKKM

    So this got me wondering……

    Anyone up for reconstructing “Spoony’s Dungeonland”? With TNing caterpillar, LV20 Doormouse Monk of death and everything dial up to 11 (20 I mean :P ) and all?

    It’ll probably be unplayable as heck as well, but that’s where the challenge will be… XD

  • http://twitter.com/Yuoaman Nick Burns

    Forgetting a few minor details and mixing some stuff up doesn’t keep this from being an awesome story, Spoony. It sounds like you guys really got up to some shit.

  • Anonymous

    Dude, don’t be so hard on yourself, you can’t be expected to remember every little detail from something that happened years ago. It was still a great story

  • Mark Harris

    That bit with the caterpillar is GOLD.  Pure GOLD.

  • Anonymous

    ROFLOL!  “You just picked a fight with a 20 level monk.”  Epic! 

  • http://profiles.google.com/imperialus1 Dave I

    In the defense of Castle Greyhawk…  Gary didn’t write that.  It was written after Gary left TSR and was a pretty deliberate F-You! to him. Castle Zygag which unfortunately only had the first couple levels published before Gary’s death is far far closer to the Castle Greyhawk that Gary actually ran back in the 70′s.

    Gary wrote some amazing modules. Check out the Village of Homlett and Queen of the Demonweb Pits for some of his best work.

  • Aduna Leonhart

    This video does it. I wanna play D&D, does anyone have a clue as to where I can find the rules on the Internet? Or would someone be kind enough to tell them to me?

  • colin_dudley

    Spoony, thank you. After getting my ass kicked all day at work I know I can listen to your epic adventure in wonderland or go shot for shot with you in the Twilight Review. Rocky on man, rock on.

  • rolflmao52

    LOL at the thumbnail ahahahahahaha

  • Specter Von Baren

    One of the things I love in this review is how Oreo’s toy squeaks when Spoony tells us the Doormouse is a 20th level monk.

  • http://twitter.com/AreWeNaught AreWeNaught

    “Any factual content can safely be assumed to range from mostly apocryphal to totally wrong.”
    This is true of most memories to be honest, so don’t worry about it too much. There have actually been studies done showing how completely unreliable our memories are, even for major events. It’s definitely not just you. :)

  • Anonymous

    Spoony,

    Tandem would be so disappointed in you!  You weren’t “forgetting details,” you were “enhancing the story!”  What makes a better story – being beaten up by the March Hare, or being beaten up by the Dormouse?

    Dave mentioned this, but it bears repeating – Castle Greyhawk (WG7) was a parody module.  It had absolutely nothing to do with Gygax’s Castle Greyhawk beyond having the same name.  Greyhawk Ruins (WGR1) is far closer to the dungeon Gygax ran, though it sort of has the same problem as Undermountain.  It’s a vast space, and there’s a lot of empty space.  Dave also mentions Castle Zagyg, which I’ve never read, but is supposed to be even closer.

    As for Dungeonland itself…well, Gary was good at writing simulationist adventures.  There really wasn’t a story beyond “escape Dungeonland.”  Everything in Dungeonland was out to kill you because everything in D&D at the time was out to kill you.  There have been some RPGs to return to Wonderland – I know there’s a Savage Worlds setting for certain – and they’ve stressed narrative in those games.  That’s crucial to a real Wonderland setting.  Wanting to be part of the Hatter’s tea party is natural, as is trying to wrest answers from the Cheshire Cat, or putting up with the Caterpillar’s rudeness, or sweating bullets trying to keep the Queen of Hearts from ordering your decapitation.  That’s the Wonderland I think would be more interesting – PCs dealing with the illogical nature of the place, the madness of its denizens, and trying to literally be the only sane people in an insane world.

    Isle of the Ape is another D&D adaptation – this time, King Kong.  I think that one works better, as the island is a credibly dangerous place.  Wonderland’s lethality just seems weird.  Is it a good game when the Mock Turtle wants your head?  I think everyone can look at Oonga, the massive ape that is venerated by one of the natives, and understand he’s a threat.  The March Hare?  Less so.

    Still, great story, hope to hear more!

  • http://twitter.com/SNESChalmers666 Michael Oswald

    Question, was Tandem a standard Bard? Or was he a Blade kit? Just curious.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_CL5LGLTLDSGXW73WU7OFUXTGIA stephen

    Spoony – adj.  1. sentimentally foolish or amorous
                        2. Foolish, silly
                 noun 1. A silly or foolish person.

    Yep, sounds like tandem.

    • ORCACommander

      sounds like noah :P

  • http://twitter.com/ogodhowdoitweet McMarcus

    Magic the Gathering box on the shelf… Is that… Shandalar?? :D

    What? So I tend to focus on the wrong things sometimes…

  • http://twitter.com/Dutchtica Floris Overvelde

    I’M SORRYYYYY

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_MRZCQB47ZGDBH7A3GXS5J5OS7M Logan

    *because of Tandem’s last line he immediatly had this thought* Tandems Next Adventure. Neverland. He’s ACTUALLY Captain Hook and Neverland is turned on its head. Peter Pan is the archevil in the campaign and all the ‘friendly’ characters of Neverland are actually monsters.*which would fit since they only like children and are all actually fighting adults that come to Neverland*

  • M Vanlue

    LOL SPOONY!!!  I SO would have loved playing D&D w/ you & your group.

    My finace was DM in one of our 3.5 campaigns that ran once a week for 3 years O_o

  • Anonymous

    I wouldn’t bring back Tandem as a PC but he would make a great NPC in a game your DMing. He’s too legendary to be a PC now I think after becoming a god and travelling the cosmos, but he would be a great legendary figure to come across. Maybe as a quest giver or even mentor figure. In fact I may use him lol

  • Eldard Koorn

    Hmmm, I read an artical on dungeonsmaster.com on the possible use of a Dungeon Master-ish NPC like in the 80′s cartoon to guide the party and having heard the tales of Tandem The Spoony I’d consider him as possible DM-ish NPC, guiding and mentoring new adventurers and such whilst observing it from somewhere.
    So Spoony, would you mind if I name my DM-ish guide NPC Tandem The Spoony as a homage to you?

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Patrick-Sewell/100003109630229 Patrick Sewell

      Dont copy him

  • Anonymous

    Spoony-
    foolishly or sentimentally amorous.
    foolish; silly

    …Yeup that fits

  • Anonymous

    Even if you did fuck up the facts of the story, this is still probably your best or second best Counter Monkey (Spoony’s Jihad being the one it might be tied with). Don’t ever beat yourself up about getting bits wrong with an RPG story–that’s half the point.

  • Anonymous

    i dont know what this whole roleplaying thing is but this story was very interesting for some reason..

  • http://twitter.com/DefectiveType40 Dylan Roy

    Honestly, I prefer your version of this one, mostly because the thought of a doormouse being a 20th-Level Monk and kicking a grown man across a room is far too entertaining.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_6EVM3F2U7HDWHYC7LO7TETE2KA MichaelT

    I know nothing about role-playing, but I really enjoy these videos. Spoony just has a real knack for telling stories in an interesting and funny way…even if he doesn’t always get all the facts right.

    And by the by:
    Spoony [spoo-nee]
    adjective
    1. foolishly or sentimentally amorous
    2. foolish; silly

    So all these years, we’ve been watching The Foolish Experiment! ;)

  • DraculaAlucard1

    Umm 1st you said wizard, then you said jester/harliquin. Did you mean one or the other, or did I miss somthing?

  • DraculaAlucard1

    Oh god, & Oreo’s squeek could not have been timed better, unless, there were three squeeks.
    Example:
    “….The doormouse….He’s a 20th level monk.”
    *Squeek Squeek SQUEEEEEEEEK!!!!!*

  • http://www.facebook.com/WantedDead Kyle Schofield

    that’s awesome. fucking 20th level doormouse. makes no sense. But ya that was an awesome story and, i agree, a great retirement.

  • http://www.facebook.com/WantedDead Kyle Schofield

    that’s awesome. fucking 20th level doormouse. makes no sense. But ya that was an awesome story and, i agree, a great retirement.

  • http://twitter.com/AllocationMoney Allocation Money

    Can you imagine how horrible that whole “referring to people by race and class” thing would go down in real life?

    “Black man, go shoot that thing with your gun.”

    • K B

       That’s d20 modern.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Ben-Smooker/100001851743299 Ben Smooker

       I think it’s bad enough that the BLACK guy has to be wielding a gun, you damn racist!!!
      (I am, of course, kidding. I just thought I’d make a humourous jest at the choice of words).

  • http://twitter.com/Doctor_Docson Doktor Dok Dokson

    What’s that in his forehead?

  • bloodshed113094

    An 18 level bard beating a 20th level Monk…
    To give perspective, that’s like Ozzy Osbourne kicking Mike Tyson’s ass!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Dustin-Smith/100001487648807 Dustin Smith

    So in a way he became a Time Lord? 

  • Patrick Brown

    Make him a shop keep in a lower level game where you think that the players might try to pull something on the shop keep but you do not want them to.  It is something my friend did with some of his old favorite characters.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Matt-Morgan/551257347 Matt Morgan

    FYI, Olympus is the Greek, Thor and Valhalla are Norse.

    • Simoneer

      Didn’t he make the distinction?

  • tza

     My favorite part:
    “He’s a twentieth level MONK” *Ska-squeek!*
    Oreo knew the moment needed a dramatic noise!

  • K B

    Are you sure your friend didn’t fudge the numbers to let you beat the hare?

    The closest thing Wizard’s of the Coast has done to resurrecting Spelljammer is the etheral isles in 4th edition.

    I remember in Baldur’s Gate 2 when you can free a Lich. After it stops time a good chunk of the party will be dead from spells like touch of death and ray of disintegration before they even move.
     

  • http://twitter.com/dither001 Nick Foster

    You know, it really doesn’t matter if the story comes out “correct,” because there are as many different versions of the same game as there are players (and then some). Everyone in the group will remember the game differently, and for different reasons.

    The paladin will remembering smiting the righteous smite. The bard will remember when his song saved the part. The cleric will remember healing you, and not getting a word of thanks. The rogue will remember how he nearly got hit by the trap he failed to disarm except for his Trap Sense and Evasion features. The fighter will remember his magic sword.

    I understand the desire to tell the story “the right way,” but you deserve a break. It was an epic tale no matter how it went down, “for real.” (To listen to some players talk, you’d think their adventures were far grander than anything that actually happened.)

  • http://twitter.com/sanguinesushi SanguineSushi

    yeah no worries on the corrections hun!  Appreciate them of course, but I have little experience with the games as it is, so I totally wouldn’t have caught a problem anyway XD  Besides, I just love hearing Spoony’s epic tales.  Seriously, I’ll laugh out loud or stare at the screen and go “oh no”  when you start hinting at something like the toilet pizza or blowing up the vampires.  ^_^

  • http://www.facebook.com/Jessano Jessica Marie

    I’m sure this has been posted before but as soon as I heard the names Morndencaindin and Bigby, I immediately think of Mordecai and Rigby from Regular Show. Anyone know if J.G Quintel is a role player or was inspired by Castle Greyhawke?

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100002386166017 Josh Fowler

    man Zeus has no room to talk :P

  • Icrangirl

    I want to draw Tandem now. XD What does this dude look like?

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1609790820 Nicolas Andrade

    What are these games he is talking about and where do i find them?

    • http://twitter.com/Big_Total_Hero Brett Hanna

      it’s Dungeons and Dragons it’s a Alice in Wonderland module from a long time ago. I’m not into DnD so I dunno where you can get the module.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Marco-Gracia/100000122473973 Marco Gracia

    Spoony’s memory problems aside (and really, I don’t think it matters all that much, since he got the main points across and it still makes for a great story), I can definitely see where he’s coming from when he said Gary Gygax didn’t make good adventure modules (or whoever wrote it, if Spoony’s mis-remembering that too). One of the main features of Wonderland is that, aside from the Queen of Hearts (and even she has moments where she becomes almost calm and friendly), all the denizens of Wonderland are enigmas; you can never tell if they’re friend or foe, because they’re all so odd and incomprehensible that they become vaguely threatening or unsettling even if they’re being affable (the Cheshire Cat is a good example; he’s creepy as hell, but he actually helps Alice). There’s a LOT of potential for a strange, whimsical, or even disturbing campaign in that, but that potential is all thrown out the window as soon as you make them all unambiguously hostile, because, as Spoony has shown us, they won’t bother talking and will just go on a killing spree.

  • DraculaAlucard1

    What’s a Litch?

    • Jegsimmons

      basically and undead evil as fuck wizard. sauron from LOTR and MORGOTH are two examples.
      its about as fuck evil and nasty as you can get.

  • DraculaAlucard1

    “The doormouse…..HE’S A 20TH LV MONK!” *Dramatic squeak* Omg, I think Oreo knows D&D, & timed that perfectly.

  • http://www.facebook.com/pandamonium411 Amanda Holland

    I really wanted to play a bard, too. We had a whole game in the works, in a city setting that the DM was certain would lend itself well to a bard. Sadly it fell through. He was going to be an awesome character, too–halfling bard who played the bandsaw.
    FUCK, counter-song’ing that caterpillar was lucky! And Iron Maiden, too! Hah!
    How the hell does one defeat the Five Point Palm Exploding Heart Technique? That bard has a fucking heart of steel, I guess.
    Wow, ya, that was a beautiful ending. Really lucky coming upon that spell-jammer ship.
    Man, the Spoony bard sounds a lot like my Changeling LARP character, Flint the Redcap. I was the ONE Redcap that wasn’t a douchebag XD

  • doresh

    Maybe a bit late to mention it, but whatever:

    The Castle Greyhawk you’re mentioning has nothing to do with Gary Gygax. It’s a humorous adventure made around 3 years after Gary left TSR. The original Castle Greyhawk (which was a typical dungeon crawler) that Gary used in one of his old campaigns has never been completely published.

  • He that knows

    Great now I have a new Spoonyism took scream at the top of my voice. As if “What’s a paladin?” and “I heard that Curtis.” weren’t bad enough. Now I have one that works in more situations!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/David-Nuka-Sonne/718413063 David Nuka Sonne

    So… bard Spoony is now a timelord ?

  • http://twitter.com/MarvGyver Bob Jones

    Drinking with Thor and getting hammered… pun intended?

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