The Avatar is snatched from the Ethereal Plane and exiled by the Guardian to the conquered, alien world of Pagan. How will the Avatar find his way back to Britannia, when he can’t even cross a lake?
I just got this in my RSS queue. SPOONY! I love these videos. After the ultima series, please pick another long-running video game series and do the same thing.
Love all your videos. Keep them coming man.
I played this in highschool quite a bit. That Tenebrae music is burned into my psyche. Doot Doot Doodalo Doot Doot Doodalo, do do do, do do do WAAAGH!!!
I gotta admit, I felt a flutter of excitement for the new review as soon as the intro started.
Good to have you back, Spoony.
EXPLODIE CHEST MONTAGE!!!
Those 30 minutes was sooo worth the wait, awesome review and a perfect start to 2012. Can’t wait for Ultima IX and FF10-2 Part 3.
I MISSED YOU.
Now get back in that sweatshop and make more vids! *cracks whip*
This was worth waiting for. Excellent.
Awesome, but there was no ad in the middle.
Thank you for your awesome videos. I appreciate all of the pain and suffering you go through to put a smile on my face.
I look at this, and it does look rushed… and terribly unsuited for the platform it was designed. Platforming was nothing new, isometric perspective was nothing new. I’d expect a lot of things from a rushed game… but this doesn’t seem rushed. It seems like they made the first half, and then just released the alpha or beta and hoped no one would notice.
And I didn’t really mind Masters of Orion 3. I really need to go back and replay 2, but there are more disappointing sequels than that.
How did avatar survive from falling into the sea if he can’t swim? :D
Yeah. You’d think he’d also break into several pieces as he slams into the water’s surface, but nooooo! :-P
Perhaps it was Orbital Wobble…..
Truly there has never been a more epic battle than Spoony’s second encounter with Miles, The Headless.
I do not mind the commercial break for you have provided me with many hours of entertainment.
Thank you Spoony
Great review as always Spoony! Can’t wait for Ultima IX!
The 1812 Overture bit was brilliant.
And, aww… Oreo wants to help Daddeh kill the headless monkey monstrosity!
Ultima VIII was one of the first games I ever played. I remember really enjoying reading the various books you find in the world and blowing shit up with the molotovs and death-disks. I also remember how much everything apart from that sucked. Still, the setting was really nicely fleshed out, and the game COULD have been great, had it not been so rushed.
One of these days you should go back and play the expansions for Ultima VI. Savage Empire in particular is so good plotwise you stop noticing the horrible controls.
I missed your reviews :)
Could be worse. The caves could’ve been brown.
There was no ad in the middle, Spoony, so I just watched the video twice. Hopefully that’ll help with the revenue?
can’t wait for the next one. Also, i did not get an ad in the middle.
Ohhhh, my man, Spoony, how you missed the perfect crossover opportunity with that children massacre scene! I was just waiting for it to transition to footage from the end of The Cinema Snob’s review of “Beware! Children at Play”. That would have been epic!
That said, I was giddily waiting for the explosive treasure chests to knock you into the abyss, and you did not disappoint. Good review :P
Noticed the Zero Punctuation imp couple on the shelf.
awsome review spoony great to have u back, couple of things, couldnt help but noticed those imps on your shelf……also oreo cute at the end, and cant wait for the next ultima ^^
Great review that in no way overshot the FUCKING COCKSUCKER! Might have to start a band called Overshoot the Fucking Cocksucker now. Also could use moar puppeh.
I was expecting the Wing Commander scream when you showed the Ultima IX box. I’ve heard that game was TERRIBLE, and I don’t understand how it could be worse than this game.
Oh fucking awesome! I have been waiting for this for so long! don’t normally post before watching the video but whatever, its Ultima fucking 8!! YESSS
Ahhahah! Return of the headless!
Good to have you back, Spoony!
Oreo was helping at the end lol
Thanks. I’ll stop at VII.
I’m wondering if you can review any of these games without the discussion of how the Garriott/EA tensions ruined these games. Also, will we be getting an Ultima Online review?
Yeah, some people might mistake the Ultima 8 box for looking “Satanic”…except for the words “PAGAN” written right on the front in all caps…oh wait, those words and symbols are just plot points that have nothing to do with either religion :/
I know right? I had hoped by now people would be able to tell the difference between a pentagram and a pentacle…but thanks to early Christian fear-mongering, I guess not. :/
Considering that even folks like Richard Dawkins also made that mistake (Of course, he used it as part of an example of “subversive pro-religious propaganda ” rather than having a “Satanic” fit), I think the blame falls on alot more people than just Christians.
True, but Christians were the ones that turned Wiccans into the stereotype that they are today and also the ones that linked them with evil and their Satan, which makes no sense as they’re two different religions entirely. Not that I hate Christians or anything, it’s just how things went down.
Not really. The myriad neo-pagan groups were used as scapegoats by numerous groups, religious and non-religious alike (just look at USSR at it’s height, for example, or Jacobin France during the Reign of Terror). Any regime that sought to punish outsiders to enforce conformity would use the propaganda that said outsiders were evil and that their practices were foul and anti-social (hence why both atheistic and theistic regimes would circulate similar ridiculous stories about pagan “cannibalism” and “child sacrifice”) .
Secondly, the erroneous linking of Wiccan beliefs to Satanism was an action done by Puritans (and certain Fundamentalist radicals who copied their beliefs). Not Christianity as a whole or Christians as a majority.
I was using “Christians” as a general term, I wasn’t saying that the entire Christian religion did it. That would be silly. But yes, I agree.
Wow, this makes the combat in Quest for Glory 3 look good.
Also the In the Mouth of Madness joke was awesome, then again old John Carpenter is awesome.
hey what gives i cant see the video all i see is a white box
Oh no, a Headless has attacked. Load Oreo on the Anal Cannon and fire!!!
Man, Beren appearing out of nowhere and killing you instantly for ANY crime pissed me off. So glad IT-HE Software found a way to kill the guy, heh.
And that was the LEAST of this game’s problems!
This review does make me feel sad kind of, cos the series just fell so fast i mean i consider the 2 7s to be the series peak but to follow it with this uggghhhh.
I didn’t get the ad in the middle either. Watched twice though. Go ahead and put up a bloopers or commentary too or something to get some more from ads. We’ll watch them! :D
I laughed so hard at “Mom, I’m not a Satanist! MOOOOOOM!” Also, best use of the 1812 Overture I’ve seen in ages. Does EVERY SINGLE CHEST explode, or just MOST of them?
I think the platforming parts would’ve made me cry. Nothing frustrates me faster in a game than missing jumps, especially when the penalty is DEATH.
Wonderful review, Spoony. Tons of fun! And Oreo VS Headless = EPIC BATTLE FOR THE AGES. By which I mean D’AAAWWW SO CUTE.
that song in the backround at the beginning reminds me of saga frontier, was it in it? it was really quiet but sounded very familiar
I mainly noticed some Star Tropics music, duck tales nes music I think. With the song at the end this review kinda had a Cool Island beat theme to it lol.
After hearing you complain about how bad and horrible happened to be Ultima 8, ended it to hear you say that Ultima ” is worse, that’s something hard to believe. I can´t wait to see the “Ultima 9″ episode.
This review was just great! Now I need to go back and re-watch the other episodes. Yeah, the opening bit with Spoony in an asylum was fantastic, as well as his scream of horror right before the “commercial break”. I can’t wait for the review of Ultima IX.
I am so glad to see this new review – and I look forward to the review of Ultima 9 – the most disappointing 9th game in a western RPG series since Might & Magic IX.
not you too.
Could you make your comment be less stupid, and actually explain what the hell you mean? Thanks.
I think this is your best video-game review yet :) Funny as hell, interesting story and a great cliffhanger. I don’t know if Ultima 9 episode will be the last in the Retrospective but we have seen characters like Warrior and Chuckles. It would be really interesting if there’s a final showdown in the last Ultima-video between all the characters that’s have been feutered in these videos. But I understand that it would be really, really hard to work it in. Wish you all the best!
Who names a world Pagan?
Heh heh heh… I’ve been waiting or this one… the Ultima 8 is the one and only one I actually played… it was supposed to be the one that got me to playing the ultima series… and no, it made me bored and angry in less than 5 minutes. Never got to play the other parts. Spoony, how about Druid demons of the mind? Did you play that?
The song ” I chase the devil” is sung by Max Romeo, and was produced in the studio owned by Lee “Scratch” Perry, with Perry’s backing band playing the riddim, but it’s still a Max Romeo’s song.
Ultima < Elderscrolls????
Yeah looks like you fucked up spoony because there was no ads for me (not even at the start, end or middle and I am not using any any block).
“Thank you, Foolish One” – thourght you were the Spooney One ;)
You remembered my birthday Spoony! Thank you!!! *watches video*
Very well written review…I’m super psyched for the next one.
I dont mind watching Ads to support the spoonyone :)
You mean you DO mind all ads deep down, but you’ll make an exception.
Ultima VIII… labeling pagans as satanists and allowing the brutal murder of children since 1994′
Thank you Spoony for making my day ^^
Oreo can do what swinging a sword 100 times cannot; take down a headless. Surely she is the greatest dog in the world!
My night, it has been made.
The Video is 32 minutes long.
For me, it was about 45 minutes long because I kept rewatching all the Explosions! That made my day. Especially watching Link blow up, WAHAAA!
I think I just reverted to my early Loony Toons-obsessed childhood by giggling my ass off at all those explosions to that iconic music.
Many thanks to Spoony on this one! I was already having a pretty good day, and this just sealed it as having one Hell of a day! And speaking of which, I really got a kick out of the opening.
“Relax, mom! I’m the Goddamn Avatar!”
No advertisement in the middle for me Spoony.
Cant wait for the conclusion!
I have to admit I really liked this game when I played it a few years ago (after installing the patch, of course). Besides, many greetings for a so enjoyable review =)
It’s great to see Spoony tackling this game. I was so hyped for this when it originally came out but boy did it hit me in the face real quick. I’ve had few chances to talk to Richard Garriott and some of the people from Origin about this game and they agree that this is one of the major things they are ashamed of during their career.
Thank you, Noah, for doing this.
Spoony, not that you need reassurance from me, but no one in their right mind would begrudge you a commercial or two. You’ve been providing us free entertainment for YEARS. If the most you ask is that we watch a commercial to increase your revenue stream, it;s the LEAST we can do.
I actually liked Pagan more than the other Ultima games. I loved the setting and the people in it, but I have to admit I completed it the first time 6 years after release…
Holy shit, content! Omnomnomnom.
You can put in five commercials for all I care, just keep making Ultima stuff.
And finish SWAT 4
He already did in a way. Check out his Justin.tv page as he played through it.
aaaaaaaaaaaaaw come on. 31.01. was my birthday, but due to weirdness with time zones, it’s already February 1st by the time I’m watching this
Right now, Richard Garriott’s twitter page is being bombarded with links to this review.
Man that was awesome! The part where you were killing the kids and listing all that shit was the funniest thing I’ve ever seen on this site. Holy fuck man
Dammit, DP. Sorry!
Jesus CHRIST, the screams! Those tortured screams from 18:52 to 18:59…
You poor, poor man.
it is at times like these that i hate being in school i just want to watch this video its been soooooooo long since he did a Ultima video. So ill probably watch it during lunch then:P i hope it is as awesome as people say.
Oreo has defeated the headless
Oreo > Avatar
EA is still doing this. Rushing games to release without letting the developers finish it just to profit. Still this is nothing….nothing… compare to the Ascension. This wild ride is heading to it’s disastrous end.
The best bit was Oreo running around while you beat the crap out of the headless thingy.
I feel compelled to speak up a bit in Master of Orion 3 defense, yeah it was clunky and it took about a dozen hours to learn how to beat the interface into doing what you wanted. (and figuring out what various obtuse poorly explained status screens actually meant) But if you could look past the admittedly numerous glaring flaws there was some fun to be had their. The ship design aspects and real time player controlled battles were pretty interesting although it likely helped I’d not played two so my exceptions weren’t built up as much.
Still it was a deeply mediocre game, but I’m not sure I’d class it as “worst squeal ever”. For me that honor is held by Dragon Age II, at least MOO III stayed in roughly the same genre and tried to expand it, if ineptly. DA II was just a raging disappoint after such a stellar first entry and completely turned it’s back on what made the first one so refreshing.
As for the reviewed game I never played it so I can’t say much about it, looks like shit anyway and it was an entertaining review anyway.
You’re right in that Master of Orion 3 did have some germ of a good game buried under the piles of colossal fuckup that ended up being shipped, but that’s still not any real excuse.
One of the guiding principles of MoO3 was that “if you reach for the
stars, you’re unlikely to end up with dirt.” Even assuming that is true,
it sure seems like you’ll be likely to fall flat on your face.
Remember, MoO3 had been in development by that time for four, almost FIVE YEARS. And it was STILL fundamentally broken as released.
Many aspects of the ship combat were non-functional, for instance, and the diplomacy dialog was actually pointed to the WRONG DATA FILE (which meant that the DiploMatic kept spewing gibberish).
Amusingly, many of these problems were eventually fixed… BUT NOT BY QUICKSILVER. No, it took dedicated folks with dissemblers to actually write patches to the executable to fix these glaring issues.
But that’s just the technical glitches. The real problem with MoO3 was the design. It was created, from the outset, to be PURPOSELY over-complicated as part of some strange attempt to reduce micromanagement and aid in online play. Seriously, the developers stated this flat out: they wanted the game to be so incomprehensible and complex with so little feedback that the player would have no choice but to not do much and thus speed up turns. Brilliant design there, buckos!
And then there were certain technical choices that time proved to be questionable. Quicksilver decided on using a voxel-based system for the 3D ship models (as opposed to polygonal) on the assumption that 3D video hardware would remain relatively rare outside of the United States. By using voxels, they could get good performance and excellent resolutions just by using the processor. But because the game was in development for so long, it soon came to pass that 3D polygon-based hardware became standard across all markets — so the game underperformed technically when it finally came out AND had all the problems associated with voxel systems.
I could rant for a very, very long time on all the problems MoO3 had, but really, MoO3 was such a clusterfuck that it might as well have been designed by Chuckles the fucking clown.
really? I enjoyed DA2, granted it was different and faster-paced, but on Nightmare that game was just as difficult, if not moreso, than the original.
I saw no add halfway through… Would have watched it gladly, proud supporter of spoony and friends. not liek the nostalgia critic hasn’t done it on his last 3 videos anyways. plus the blip commercials for the middle are better than the ones at the begining.
No ad for me either. Probably because I’m european, blip tends to not have ads for us.
I saw no ad and I checked my addons and no Ad blocker plugs. And I am in Ohio
Damn impressive review spoony XD gotta lotta good laughs outta it….and good ta see Oreo kicking headless arse :) keep up the great work and cant wait till the next vid ~peace~
Oh hell yes! I was not expecting this retrospective to be continued. This was a sizable review too. Can’t wait for the next one Spoony.
And then maybe after Ultima 9…maybe, just maybe, could we get more FFX-2? Cuz that would be awesome.
It can’t be overstated how dumbed down this game was compared to its predecessors that had been released *only a year* earlier. You had a franchise with some of the best writing and story in gaming history, and then you suddenly and inexplicably dump all that in the trash to make a platforming game. It’s truly mind-boggling.
In that sense, Ultima IX is far less of a disappointment – because at least it was released many years after the previous games, so we can assume that all the brilliant minds that had worked on Ultima VII were no longer around.
No big deal about the ad, Spoony one. Doug has been putting in seques into his newest videos for the same reason.
Nice to know spoonys continuing these as he said he would. Spoony once again welcome and the video was funny as heck.
Why do all the new cartoon graphics make you look like Shaggy?
The ride to get to U9 has been fun
nothing like rushing a game to kick fans in the balls
god, that conversation with your mom is much like the one I had with my step mom in a Suncoast. While attempting to find an anime VHS (yes, it’s that old of a story, shut up) my step mother starts in on me about how it’s evil because anime should be for kids because it’s a “cartoon”. Before I even get a chance to explain that one, it’s an art style and two, not all are blood and evil she picks up like the worst possible cover, one step down from being with the Hentais in the “special” section.
Ended up having to buy frickin’ dubbed Sailor Moon just to shut her up. (and while I like dubs, newer dubs, the SM stuff is shit because it’s too “localized” and edited for a younger audience.)
Wow, tangent, sorry about that.
I must say the nights in the editing dungeon paid off, Spoony One, the sequence with the 1812 overture was very nicely done.
Also, I didn’t see the mid-review commercial either and I leave ad blocker disabled on your pages completely, not sure what’s up.
p.s. Your Padwan is learning well I see
Awesome as always spoony
glad to see you’ve still got the touch Spoony. And if I may, I was actually very pleased to see you get through the review without any interruptions (skits) until the end. Either way, I’m really excited to see the final game, I really am, thanks for the ride.
Could be worse, Spoony. They could have turned Ultima into a first person shooter.
Also, Adblock Plus, don’t even remember the last time I saw ads :3
A first person shooter where you shoot stuff that drop ankh when killed, which fill you virtue power
You guys realize that you’re giving them ideas, right?
EA strikes again! if they even, slightly tarnish Mass Effect 3, bad things will happen. Anyway, great vid man, looking forward to your next.
Yeah, the whole *rushing the game out so we can make a quick cashgrab* was the main problem with Dragon Age 2, at least in my opinion. Well, that and thinking *Mass Effect is Bioware’s most popular franchise at the moment, so we have to make Dragon Age more like Mass Effect*, which is… just ten different kinds of retarded.
But just to put things into perspective: I was complaining that Dragon Age 2 was a disappointment, and rightfully so. But that, my friends, is nothing compared to Ultima 9. I applaud you Spoony, because I would understand if you had decided to skip that one. Go forth, Goddamn Avatar, and rip that pukestain of a game a new one.
I definitely agree with the DA2 comment.
I have my own theory that, after ME2 was successful but pissed some people off due to simplification, bioware decided to see just how far they can dumb down a game before people get pissed off and then apply the findings to ME3.
Yeah, Mass Effect 2 was a good game but could have been so much better.
ME1: To collect resources and explore planets you must drop from orbit in a jet powered tank.
ME2: “Probe launched”.
oh finally another ultima :D im glad to see you get back to the “good” stuff, its a lot of work, we know that and we see that – and we appreciate that :D
ps got you on my whitelist for adblock
so you have to steal, kill, ect basically breaking many if not all of the tenets of being the Avatar. That could have been an amazing storyline opportunity showing the Avatar having to break his own beliefs to survive.
Like ZOINKS! Shaggy reviews another crazy Ultima game.
And why does everyone on TGWTG put commercials in the middle of the fucking video?
No, we can’t lump them all together. The options are: preroll, midroll, postroll, pop-ups.
Midrolls we have control over where it goes in the video. Usually we opt-out of midrolls because we know fans don’t like them. However, revenue has been SERIOUSLY down this month. As such, we’re trying them in order to recoup it.
Why dont you start charging for it then I wouldnt mind paying $1-2 per episode (as long as it wasnt the 30 second reviews) off itunes
How did this happen? The site’s review production is doing really well, with about 4-6 videos from the big names on TGWTG. Hell, you made six comic book reviews in the past MONTH! That’s a lot. Whatever the problem is, it isn’t connected to the site’s content.
So where is the money going? Is viewership down? Did Blip reduce their rates? What happened?
Spoony. I could care less about commercial breaks. We don’t pay for this shit, and you need some kind of cash flow. Insert commercials if you would like.
Oddly enough, I didn’t get any ads in the middle. Though I’m pretty sure I’ll be viewing this one several times anyways. The explosions are addicting like that…
Also, is it just me or did Oreo look like the happiest being in existence to ever encounter a headless abomination?
I’d say you picked the best music to speak of ungodly frustrating RPG platforming with.
Startropics is one nostalgic clusterfuck.
oh I’ve been waiting for Ultima 8! hah Spoony you are so funny! yes, I hated this game as a child, everything was bad controls .. omg and I used the floppy version also .. maybe you should try it now that there are patches?love your vids! http://www.youtube.com/user/denderfurger
When you’re fighting the Headless, is that the bus ride theme from EarthBound?
honestly, since you started this I as waiting for the day you would torture yourself again with 9, cant waiiiit ^^
Thanks for the great vid :)
nice to see Miles and Oreo again, the after-credits scene was cool too =D
It’s always the 8th in the series with you, isn’t it Spoony?
That outtake at the end was adorable.
I dont care about the commercial break. I’m happy that you can make some money out of this. And I am also really happy that you’re making video again. The ultima serie is one of the best one, until EA started to enforce deadline (Ultima 7 but still ok) and started to get into gameplay (ultima 8). Ultima 9 was a piece of shit because EA relocate everyone on the ultima online project and when it was mature enough, they said “Hey assholes, you have only a few months to complete the game that was in developpement for 4 years, now START WORKING, I WANT MONEY” “Yeah but we were busy with ultima onl…” “IWANTMONEY!!!!!!!!!!” Gamedesigners were so pissed that some of them, left the boat and Richard had to come back from the heaven and start working on design to fill de gap.
Hmm, was the commercials region specific? I did not get any commercials.
commercials may be because of their browser, ad-blocker usually takes care of it (free add-on)
i got ad block plus disabled for this website and only commercial i get is at the beginning and end like normal
I’ve just started watching this video and I had to pause it to say this: Spoony is currently my favorite retro game reviewer. And you know why? Because he actually gets sh*t done. AVGN and such got some minor popularity and got so high and mighty that they can’t bring themselves to make new videos. They shower us with crap like expo interviews, gaffe reels, etc. instead of making great videos that made them popular in the first place. Spoony actually made his quota with Skullduggery review, all that came out after was a bonus.
Btw. I enjoyed the first 3 minutes of this video more than anything I’ve seen on TV in the last 3 months.
This was actually intended to be a critic to AVGN (my previous favorite internet reviewer), but hey, suck my dick!
No… No…. I SLEPT TOO LONG!
Ahhh, good times. It’s always good when the end of your game is more or less a rip off of Army of Darkness. ;D
This is fantastic Spoony! great to see you making videos again, cant wait for your next one. Though I didn’t get a commercial at any point except at the beginning..weird!
Hey Spoony, why you soundin’ like Linkara trying to be AVGN in this one?
the “piece of fuck” line reminded me of avgn lol, but spoony has always had that sort of style. not to mention he’s met them both.
Spoony and AVGN started around the same time. It’s not like the AVGNism hasn’t influenced Spoony and other reviewers. Spoony even mentions AVGN in his first review.
spoony that was awesome!!!
can’t wait for ultima 9!!!
keep the good work!!! XD
children killer ¬¬
You’re looking more well, the insanity of this game notwithstanding. Love it!
Great review, Spoony! Definitely worth all the wait! I can’t wait for Ultima IX!
Spoony, you have killed younglings and joined the Dark Side. Congratulations.
Which means it’s up to the newly trained padawan, Oreo, to seek out her rouge Jedi master and defeat him using all that he has taught her.
Hmm… potential for a GOOD Star Wars prequel here…
I remember being so very disappointed with this game. All the potential in the world and all of it squandered.
I like the Spoony Bogard picture.
i didn’t get a commercial, and you really didn’t yell all that much. A little let down.
What is with EA? does everything they touch slowly wither and die especially rpgs? i mean this isn’t the only RPG to go downhill that they produce. Compare Dragon age 1 to Dragon age 2, or mass effect 1 to mass effect 2, both sequels far inferior to the first because of stripped down content to make it more “mainstream”. Makes me really worry bout future sequels in the series.
EA if your listening please take your dick out of these companies that make RPG’s and let them do their thing Please. Even if its a few months behind schedual its better to wait 2-3 months for a good game that have a shitty game that is on time.
Still, their poisonous touch has ruined more than just RPGs. Just look at what they did to the Tiberium and Red Alert lines of the Command and Conquer series. When even Joseph “I’m Kane, Motherfuckers” Kucan can’t save a game you know that company goofed and goofed badly.
is not just rpg’s. ea lures a game studio in with the amount of money and publicity, marketing, and budgets your games will get but at the price of EA slowing assuming complete control over your company and disbanding you to reap from your franchises directly.
Hm, I wouldn’t say Mass Effect 2 was stripped down or inferior to the first. The first simply had more pointless skills for each character, and gave you more points to jam into those skills. Mass Effect 2 made it so that characters who should be experts at hacking/repairing/whatever are already experts that can crack any lock with minimal effort, reducing the gameplay/story segregation. They made the combat abilities priorities because they already were priorities.
I do agree about DA2, though, it was quite a bit different and not in a good way.
A WILD SASQUATCH APPEARS
OREO USES ADORABLE. IT’S SUPER EFFECTIVE!
Hey, you completely forgot the armageddon part of this game! No, I don’t mean the spell. I mean where the Titans of Fire, Water and Earth unleash their powers upon Pagan, and reduce most of it to a smoking cinder, because the Avatar set them free so he can consume their powers!
okay, genuine question… Why in the name of Reb Brown’s left testicle, does the Guardian simply not crush the Avatar? He has him in his fucking hand. He’s standing on it. He could just make a fist and solve the problem once and for all. God I hate Moron villains.
Because the Guardian is a thespian, a bad one.
I never got his name though. Exactly what is he a guardian of? He seems to be doing the opposite of guarding things…
“I come from the Net.
Through systems, peoples and cities
To this place:
My format: Guardian
To mend and defend
To defend my new-found slaves
Crush their hopes and dreams
To defend them from…my enemies
They say THE AVATAR lives outside the Net
And snarks on old games for pleasure.
No one knows for sure, but I intend to find out!
Despite all its flaws the game still holds a special place in my heart since it was the first ever RPG I played on the PC.
i think the avatar the last airbender intro sequence could have been a decent joke with the whole “the avatar must conquer earth, fire, water, air” thing :p
So….I might just be an idiot, but……is that a drawing of you as the Pokemon guy there on the wall? If so…
That’s drawing of Spoony as Terry Bogart from King of Fighters games.
Ohhhhhhhhhh…yeah, shows what I know, huh? Still…
AWESOME. I wonder who did it, it’s an awfully cool piece of art.
I think is him as Terry Bogard, from King of Fighters
It appears the Spoony-wan trained Oreo well
OMG I was so waiting for you to do this one I so knew it was gonna be a good review for a disappointing sequel not horrible just really buggy. And I agree with you curse you platforming in Ultima! Oh and gotta love to hate the rocks that will disappear underwater to.
New Ultima retrospective?!
.. I’ll get the popcorn.
Ultima VIII raped the series and left it for dead. Ultima IX finished the job.
Are those Imp dolls back there?
Spoony, are you a Zero Punctuation fan?
I remember Ultima VIII. Good grief, I never felt so bad about “winning” when I finished that game. Yeah, I escaped from Pagan. But I pretty much broke everything in that world, doomed it to earthquakes, volcanoes, hurricanes, and monsoons. Oh, and I pretty much destroyed all magic, including the good magic. The avatar of air really let me know on that one. And did I mention that the Avatar, the supposed good guy, pretty much left that world in ruins?
I never had the chance to get into Ultima, I was in other sort of RPGs and never quite touched the series.
… Until it was too late, yes. The first Ultima I “played” was the Ultima IX demo, and even the most sell-out of game reviewers back at the time unanimously said it was a horrible, unplayable piece of shit.
I feel like I missed something, but I guess I have to thank you Spoony for showing me that there was a past in which the Ultima series had glory.
Wonder if Oreo knows it’s Miles under the Headless suit?
MAKING MONEY ON YOUR REVIEWS AND MAKING US LAUGH!?
WHAT IS THIS!?
An ideal situation I believe.
you need me spoons
Headless returns…. for another beat down… :D
Oreo wins effortlessly.
Does that mean Oreo can overpower the Avatar?
She was trained by Spoony-Wan, so it’s quite possible…
That was a Marvelous review. This one is very entertaining.
Very well edited, scripted, and organized. I can’t imagine what’s the deal with Nine, but I can’t wait to see… and then, when it’s all over… you can finally go back to Deadly Premonition, once and for all. Lol
Good one spoony, Not the best ultima review but it was as always very entertaining to watch! keep up the good work and lookin forward to next one and ffx-2 episodes
I kind of felt bad for cheating my way through U8, but after this review, I actually feel good about it. This game was made by the same guys that gave us “Crusader: No Remorse” & “No Regret”. At least those were kind of good…
Ah Ultima 8… I remember that from way back.. that jumping… I had an unpatched version… One of the main reasons I never finished it.
So many reviews only so to ensure that your viewers will understand a single review of a game you’ve been wanting to review since the beginning of your Ultima retrospective…
Goodness, that’s dedication. I salute you sir!
why you gonna rule a land without people to be ruled?
I heard Star Tropics music! I heard it! I loved that game! :D
Is spoony wearing the straitjacket
front and back?
Wait, so you mean to tell me that EA has been rushing developers to release their games faster (and thus churning out pieces of shit) since way back in 1994? Why does this company still fucking exist???
Because it somehow makes money for them. Stop buying shit, people!
Because people vote with their wallets, unfortunately.
Hopefully after this, you’ll be having another Rebuary. Best thing of last year.
I’m really tied of all this content shit! I don’t want to see well-produced, well-written, and entertaining pieces! This is why no one watches Spoony anymore! Fact: Spoony was funnier in 1994. Ever since then he’s been going down hill.
Thank you for the laugh, good sir, it brightened my day. :D
I must admit, I never played any of the Ultima games. I’m sort of Diablo child, it was my favorite game of all time and even not being an active gamer anymore, I still like to bit this once in a while. Anyway, I watched all your Ultima reviews and it’s really sad what they did with this game at the end.
Glad to see you getting back to Ultima. I loved your reviews of the rest of the series and I am sorry to see it going all to hell now.
kudos to a very interesting review, thanks to you i’m starting to get into D&D rpg video games, right now I just picked up Eye of the beholder on Super Nintendo at a swap meet and it is very interesting to how it plays (however it is frustrating to use your weapons and items compared to the pc version), maybe one maybe just one day you can review it.
Yay! More Ultima!
And MAN, I gotta hear why 9 was so bad now! I never played these games, mostly because I don’t think we got them here and even if we did my PC was crap but having watched these reviews for so long I gotta know why all this was started!
You know… it’s almost like the Guardian was banking on the Avatar getting out of Pagan by doing these horrible horrible things and corrupting his own image with the fate of Brittania on the line. However I have a vague suspicion that was too good a story for what they were going for.
And it’s great to see new stuff from you again Spoony!! And ignore the assholes in the comment section… because they are assholes.
Can’t wait for Ultima 9! And if you ever decide to go back to Deadly premonition I’m looking forward to that too! And another long-running game review series like this or Phantasmagoria or Ripper would be good.
Heck you know what? Just post anything. :D I am easily pleased.
YAY! And the cuteness at the end was just flipping adorable! Thanks for the video!
lol With box art like that it had to have been a pretty hard sell to most parents.
The part where he finally got over the lake then the chest exploded knocking him back in the water. That was classic. It’s moments like those when you realize its not just bad but the developers are trolling you too.
The concept of a mother having her kid committed because she thinks he’s a satanist is pretty twisted & messed up. & the way Spoony plays it out plucked one of the few emotional nerves I still possess. Or maybe I’m taking the scene too seriously…
I dunno, I remember my mom forbidding me from getting into D&D. Since I started watching some of spoony’s vids with her she’s realized how retarded that fear was.
I’m going to kill you!!!!!!! (Picks up 20 sided dice) Fail.
I think it was meant to be a bit over the top because some parents (and
in my case grandparents) had beyond over reactions to these games. My
grandmother went so far as to say that some woman at a church meeting
picked her out and knew my uncle (her son) was playing D&D and made
me swear to never play it… like under penalty of being possessed or
something(and I apologize if you get this twice, disquious is being weird on me)
I grew up in the South, and I remember D&D games being burned. Folks had their kids taken for being “satanic”. Commitment for being “satanic” would totally happen there. And yes, I agree, twisted and messed up.
love the penny arcade esque art for this video lol. Not a fan of commercials in general but in no way could I ever hold it against Spoony. The passion he exerts in these reviews is what I enjoy the most. Love your work Spoon and you deserve to make money off of your work, especially when you’re kind enough to do it for free :D
My only gripe with the ad in the middle of the video was that it came in the middle of a word (“pa– *COMMERCIAL BREAK* –tch”). XD If it had been half a second before or after, I wouldn’t have been bothered at all by it. And still, even though it came in the middle of a word… I was only mildly annoyed at best. Not enough to click off the video, and it certainly didn’t make me mad at Spoony.
With what NC is doing, I think his mistake is calling attention to the ads. By blatantly waving his arms and saying “Here’s commercials!” and then “Those were commercials!” in the middle of a review is distracting and it really messes with the flow of the review. If he just had the ads play at the video’s natural halfway point (and he can write around the ads without having to call attention to them) … I don’t think people would be as upset. It’d still be possible to maintain the “flow” of the review. Kinda like Spoony did here. He didn’t stop his review cold and loudly proclaim there were commercials. NC is just figuring out what works and what doesn’t, and the rest of his show is still hilarious.
That was perfect! The only Ultima game I ever played and it was a broken mess. I completely forgot about the terrible jumping parts too. Looking forward to the ripping apart of IX. :)
I like the Imps you have on the book case.
Funny annecdote: Those who’ve played the original Dungeon Keeper all the way through might recognize the last boss of that game as a certain character from this one.
lol this is rapidly becoming The Oreo Experiment. Puppy stole the show :P jk. Great review spoony!
I was just over at TGWTG watching the new NC and I couldn’t believe the comments people where making over the mid-show ads. I’m glad to see that the Spoony’s fans are a little more reasonable. I mean people were accusing Doug of ‘whoring himself out’. Ex-fucking-scuse me!?!
I can’t tell you how much that pisses me off! These talented people provide us with HOURS of free, high quality entertainment. All they’re asking in return is thirty second of our time to watch muted TV ads. If you can’t take 30 seconds out of your miserable, self-righteous life to help these artists pay the bills, as far as I’m concerned YOU ARE THE WHORE!! Let’s all give these folks a helping hand and turn off our ad-blockers. Hell, if you have the money, why not donate or buy some DVDs or something, sadly I don’t have any income right now, but if I did, rest assured I would!
Channel Awesome rocks and deserves our support!
By “whoring himself out” they mean that he does this for the money, not as a hobby, or to entertain people, understand?
And stop with this “free entertainment” stuff, that already became a cliche among internet entertainers, even NC said that that’s no excuse for anything.
Plus, this is not a “job” per say.
Ah, and yes, you contradicted yourself with the “free entertainment” thing.
You say it’s free entertainment, BUT we should BUY something to support them, or watch ads so they get money (that’s exactly the same as donating BTW), for a FREE show.
Doesn’t that sound wrong to you?
If it’s really FREE, why should we watch ads, or donate?
That’s why ppl bitch about these things. Try to understand their point of view first.
but that, really is nothing for you or anyone else to complain about. its a choice for spoony to make in his life. the only choice you and I have is to not watch his stuff.
nothing here is actually a ‘problem’, except the oversensitive bitching of certain people.
“watching ads in the middle of a video? even though nothing actually comes out of my pockets, this is just like paying real money! this is just WRONG!!”
spoony never owed you anything in the first place. even back when he was the ‘old’(what the hell does that even mean?) spoony.
how isn’t it a job? the pour hours of work, time, and countless dollars(costumes and such) for this, and it isnt a job? fuck you.
Nothing wrong with it being a job. Doesn’t mean it’s the Oldest One though. ;)
You don’t have to pay to watch an ad. Still free. Still a lame complaint. Ads are a good thing anyways, give you time to go refill your drink or get a snack.
For your information I always try to understand other people’s point of view as best I can. In this case I dismissed said point of view as unreasonable and immature.
It takes money to make these videos and run the websites, ad revenues are how they pay for it.
According to Linkara, revenues have been down lately, so adding the new ads isn’t something they want to do, but need to in order to cover the production and hosting costs. Plus many of the producers rely on this for at least part of their own personal income making it a matter of keeping a roof over their head for some.
That’s why you should watch the ads. If you find the videos at all entertaining skipping the ads is incredibly unfair to them given the amount of work they put in.
should buy? we can buy something to support them sure, but its like someone is twisting your arm saying “buy my dvd or don’t dare check the videos!”. you are not paying a fee to log into content of the site, you do not have to buy or donate anything to Spoony and unless you feel an unnatural urge to buy every single thing advertise in those 5 to 10 seconds adds (of which you would only watch the first one before, since you could just close the video at end credits before the second add comes).
i would say this constitutes as free entertainment to the viewer, and even if the viewer isn’t putting money into, money has to be moved behind scenes: hosting, costumes, trips and such. and even with all that he still has not said “hey guys, i need $### for food/medicine/pet/prostitutes.
finally, yes, Noah has slowed down on production, but he has kept quality consistent and even the not as produced videos (like counter monkey which is essentially a v-log) are still very much entertaining. hell, even his quiet constant cameos have been proper and not just burning his appearances over and over again.
… It’s an activity that they engage in as their primary source of revenue. That is the definition of a JOB.
TANSTAAFL. Or Free Video, either. It’s gotta pay for itself, and allow someone the ability to do it, or it simply can’t happen. That’s just reality. Many people do things for love, but still must make a living at it, or they have to go make a living somewhere else and the job doesn’t get done. Doesn’t mean they don’t do it for love, or fun, or compassion, or whatever. Just means Love doesn’t keep the lights on.
Now we viewers can pay in money (donate), pay in time (watch ads) or not pay at all (neither). That last choice means it actually is free entertainment to *you*, but it means someone else is buying your “free lunch.” For the record, I will happily watch ads so that someone else can block ads and watch for “free”, since I know that if too many of us don’t pay somehow, the videos quite simply can’t be made.
I run a theater group, and we don’t get paid; I could go on and on forever about how much better our show would be if at least the cast as an organization did. And how much better a job I could do if I could get paid enough that I didn’t have to have another job(s) for my “living.” But that’s life.
Yeah, because every time someone asks money for something, that means they’re whoring themselves out. Like, say, the creators of every Ultima game. Why not just give it out for free? Simple, they whored themselves out for money. Makes sense. Same with all non-freeware games, actually. And movies, comics, everything.
If he’s going to dedicate his time and try to do as people want then he almost needs to make money. When people start things they have tons of ideas and it’s easy to put things together. People don’t expect much. Once time rolls it’s harder and takes more of it.
You morons aren’t all there is. Get a life and some patience. Oh, ever think if you didn’t bitch over little things you could help him make a more quality product…which, by the way, is what money does…
When I rewatched the video, I specifically turned off my adblock just so I could see the ad. Instead, I got the stupid Poppa John’s Pizza ad at the beginning. I got cheated.
At least this time no one will argue that Spoony’s fans are the least reasonable when it comes to change.
I argue for… yeah ok…
Only recently I wrote a blog about this game… I can feel the pain, you
felt! Back then and today… The Ultima series was soooooooooooooo good
in the beginning. But with this game everything went downhill :(
You know what franchise has a title ending in “IX” that doesn’t suck? Final Fantasy.
you know that was a cheap blow… there aren’t any other games with IX in the title besides Final Fantasy and Ultima. Oh wait, there is dragon quest.
Nope – Might and Magic IX (http://www.hardcoregaming101.net/mightandmagic/mightandmagic5.htm) is a thing that exists. It’s a terrible thing that exists.
Dammit… I knew when I made that post that there was something that I forgot.
You should be damning Alexander for making you remember that dredge.
I want to say “Wizardry”, but they only ever got up to 8, didn’t they?
Mind you, if certain game companies (Capcom, I’m looking at you) knew how to count, there’d have been an RE 9, a Street Fight 9, … instead they release eighteen-to-twenty games that are all Street Fighter 3
Is DQIX any good? I played VIII briefly (and loved it, btw), but I didn’t have a DS when IX came out, and I never bothered to buy it even after I got my DS.
(V is the best, btw ;D)
oh-ho-ho…. i’ll argue that one buddy, all of the newer games (all of them since ten, which was at least bearable) have been complete betrayals of the final fantasy games. granted, they arent themselves bad games, but with the title final fantasy in front of it, it should be freaking amazing!
IX is nine. Comes before ten. XI comes after ten, but not IX.
I’m actually with Spoony on this one. 9 just seemed juvenile and horrible. ^ and 5 wasn’t like that. Hell Mystic Quest wasn’t like that. I got so sick of the game after about 3 hours I couldn’t play anymore. Please explain to me the princess kidnapping opening? Why? “Cuz she’s cute” is NOT a valid answer!
IX No, no, no. Spoony said the art style was juvenile. But ignoring the admittedly bad art style, FFIX is actually pretty damn good. The setting is supposed to harken back to the classic FF’s, with Black Mages, Red Mages, (one of your party members is even a Dragoon ^_^) having a party with four characters at a time, and it’s not fucking sci-fi. As for your princess kidnapping query, the reason was Reagent Cid ordered Baku to kidnap her, so he used Tantalus to do so. Zidane having a thing for her was just his personal reason for doing it.
I admit, FF9 is far from being the best FF, but it’s worthy of at least some praise. It’s plot isnt convoluted like FF8′s, the characters are fun and colorful, and best of all: It’s essentially a classic final fantasy on the ps1.
old school spoony. this is what i like.
I’m sure this will get me banhammered, but Spoony bitching about not making money is pathetic, considering the fact that he’s barely made any review in a year. Is the money just supposed to fall out of the sky? You can put all the ads in that you want, but Noah has a friggin college degreee, so don’t bitch about no making enough money. If you need more money, go out and get an actual job.
Yay, I got a commercial break that reminded me to go pee~
I know this is probably going to get me banhammered, but why should Spoony still be getting tons of money when he’s barely put anything out in a year? Is the money just supposed to fall from the sky? If Noah needs more money, the he should go out an get an actual job, with the highly sought-after COLLEGE DEGREE he has. I love how the TGWTG crew bitches about lack of money, yet they always have enough to buy costumes, new movies, theatre trips, brand new games, new computers, new cameras, and still have enough left over to fly across the country to conventions. Put in as many ads as you want….but you ain’t fooling me, and from a lot of the comments on this and the TGWTG site, you ain’t fooling a lot of others either.
your a douchebag. if you were in his position, you would be doing much worse. besides you seriously think noah is just going to up and say “hm, you know what that random asshole brian is right! i should just drop the entirety of what ive dont the past 4 (5?) years, betray my fans, and give up this glorious lifestyle of having fun reviewing movies and games, and go get a 9-5 office job as a computer technician.” Fuck you brian.
Its the other way around sherlock. they buy costumes, new movies, plane tickets, all the things you listed etc. so they can create this content, and present it to you. for FREE. yes for free. dont give me the “ads are just like making us pay!” bullcrap. would you rather this be a 11.99 per month subscription site? has a penny actually left your pocket? They put in the time and effort to make it interesting. They more than deserve to receive donations.
In case you havent grasped the concept of donating yet, if you dont want to donate, then dont. simple as that.
With all due respect, I would rather (and happily!) pay a monthly subscription with expectations of productivity that are more or less met whenever possible. That’s the model used on all the other, uh.. ‘video entertainment’ sites I frequent. But I may be in the minority on this one.
well thats the discrepancy. you’re complaining as though youre ALREADY paying when you obviously arent.
and at the same time you same people complain spoony just isnt the same because he does it ‘for the money’
if this became a paysite spoony would quite literally start doing it ‘for the money’ and not because he likes it.
I’ll start complaining when his episodes become consistently sub-par and he has as many commercial breaks as a half hour television show on fox.
At the moment I’m very entertained and all I had to suffer was 2 30 second commercial breaks. And I can watch this video any time I want, not just in a time slot.
It’s funny because you’re wrong.
Lol, it’s funny how everytime spoony releases a new video, a new arse kisser comes out everytime. Comments like yours are perfect bait to bring them out. I’m not saying if I agree with you or not because I’m sure the arse kisser will return and act like he knows how Noah thinks and berate us some more.
Wait, “tons” of money? Where are you getting that? Spoony has made a multi-award winning Vlog catered to an internet-savvy audience, so we can assume he’s on the high-end of the non-corporate-sponsored blogger incomes.
Now, let’s take a guesstimate at this review – from the best figures I could find there are about 50x the pageviews as there are comments. Now, this may be higher or lower depending on the niche, but let’s stick with this figure. So, let’s assume Spoony’s new review has garnered ~12,500 pageviews so far. Each pageview is worth about $0.006, or 1000 views ~ $6.25. He’s earned ~$78 since his upload (roughly minimum wage for one day).
Now, this is before it gets posted on TGWTG.com, so he’ll see a jump in traffic while the video is featured. If it, say, doubles, that’s $150/day for two days, and then it drops off steeply as everybody has already seen it. If it drops to 20% of what it was after the initial posting (which I think is optimistic) due to return visits by fans, then that’s:
$78+$150+$150+$30+$30+$30+$30 ~= $500/week.
Then let’s say he’s able to put out a video every week and maintain the $500/week. That’s $26k/year, or minimum wage for full-time work. Keep in mind, this is also before taxes, before maintenance and hosting costs, and equipment/travel costs.
Even if we were to double the estimated visits – implying Spoony’s Vlog is among the most popular internet video websites in existence that’s not sponsored by a news corporation at 25,000 pageviews a day for new videos – that’s still $52k/year. I wouldn’t call that “tons”, and I believe the first estimate of ~$30k/year is a bit more accurate.
He lives in Arizona – which isn’t pricey (I’m in Utah, which is slightly more expensive in some respects, and live comfortably off of $1300/mo.), and also lives with his brother.
So, either Spoony is making 6-figures while choosing to live with his brother in an inexpensive state without any outward signs of wealth and prudently investing it in preparation to retire by the age of 35… or he’s making average to slightly-above average income while sharing the rent/mortgage on the house with his brother and is asking forgiveness from his fans for having to insert a 30s ad which will allow him to continue producing the Vlog in the manner he wants.
BTW, ignoring the abysmal unemployment rate for men in their 20′s (>21% last I checked), his Computer Science Degree might net him a grand total of $40k/year with an entry level position.
In other words: The internet reviewer job doesn’t pay well unless you’re an innovator and are able to adapt to your niche. I imagine the guys at RoosterTeeth do pretty well, but they also have more revenue streams from sales of their products and monthly subscriptions for special perks. They’re about as big as you’re going to get while still maintaining the “guys who do this for fun” feel.
JESUS! You sure know your shit. The Internet needs more people like you.
Yeah, because your precious college degrees are worth so much now. Not like they’re a dime a dozen. And real jobs are just so easy to come by. And pay more than circus peanuts.
Oh wait, Spoony did make a real job here on his own hard work? Woah, what a coincidence! Tons of money yeah I’ll bet. Like any other life all that goes to keeping you working.
You deserve to be banhammered… straight to the FauxRealm, where common sense goes to die.
They NEED the costumes, new movies, theater trips and brand new games. Otherwise TGWTG will have much less content.
If I have a problem with anything, it’s the conventions. I don’t care about just one con that everyone’s heard of. I mean going to 5-6 a YEAR. That really cuts into production, and it can’t be good for the site or the fans. I would rather cut down on conventions than add a new commercial break.
Often cons pay people to come, especially if they are going to do panels, etc.
BBS = Barbecue Sauce, amirite? Huh? Huh?
The Avatar is learning to use the power of fire, Earth, Air, and Water. That sounds suspiciously familiar.
Also, Oreo can take down a Headless? That dog should be a Avatar.
AWESOME. cant wait
Fucking great review Spoony!
Well worth the wait.
Lots of laughs, and the ending song is just so perfect… wow.
HE KILLED YOUNGLINGS
Great review as always, thank you Spoony!
Awesome review. I’ve been anticipating Ultima 9′s review ever since you first brought it up. I think its cool that you went through all of the Ultima games, and I must say that even positive reviews were still good entertainment.
I was thinking the gameplay looked like Diablo; which on its own is not a bad idea… but y’know… not the whole story. Platforming; crap. I grew up in the days when platforming was still big. I tried to avoid them though. Its weird now that I think about it, but I’m not sure how many RPGs I actually played from ’95-02 despite it kinda being my main thing. Spooney thinks his memory is bad. I have trouble remembering what I was doing through most of highschool.
Spoony’s back, motherfucka!!!
Loved the video but no ad with Google Chrome.I have no problems with ads for online videos (if the video producer is worth the time) so next time ill switch to a non-adblocking browser :P
Like previously said, this really has the feel of your classic informative/rage ratio, and it’s fantastic
I kept hearing Badrock saying “Let’s rock!” watching this gameplay footage. Is that because this game is so broken and repetitive, or because it’s so stupid I’m suffering damage brain smells like toast gippitywoogasplech$
I’m thrilled to be seeing more of the Ultima retrospective, and I can’t wait to see how godawful Ultima 9 is. You can do it, Spoony! Bring it!
Spoony ends-up in a mental hospital for Satan worship and swears at the game as he explains it. LOL
I love it. :-)
You know, Spoony…
I’m wondering if you could make a grass-battle contest again, but
involving lakes and oceans instead. I can picture the fake trailers
going like: “In a world… where monstrous water-puddles appear out of
nowhere every time is rains…”
It would be fun.
I have NO clue what the fucking hell they were thinking for even making a game like this. You basically have to run and jump like a madman, swing at absolutely nothing, kill several innocent children, and finally get killed by exploding chests. WTF?! :-P
I’d be more than happy to donate to keep this site going, unfortunately I’m unemployed right now, but when I finally do get a job you can expect to receive many donations from me. Thanks for all the hard work Spoony, I was hoping to create my own review show too, but alas I have neither the time, money or talent, so I’ll just keep supporting you.
I remember being disappointed with Ultima 8 considering how much I loved 7 and Serpent Isle. But Ultima 9… holy god, he wasn’t wrong when he called it a betrayal. I thought they were going to learn from all the Ultima 8 mistakes, and instead they forgot all the history of the previous games, buggy as hell, bad plot, horrible characters, and no-continuity. God I was furious by how awful it was. Ultima 8 was a masterpiece compared that horrible game.
Whoa, wait, Spoony’s still doing reviews? Wow, I’m surprised and pleased. I thought for sure this website was just becoming his blog for dog training and other people’s videos. Glad to see you’re back, Spoony.
This is by far the best entry in the retrospective series. Fantastic review, Spoony!!!!!!
I don’t see any ads on my browser, (Not intentionally; I’d turn any blocking off for this site –maybe its because I’m in Canada) but I did see the ad gap in the middle of the vid. Unfortunately, it came after Spooney came back from the insanity break so I don’t think it was timed right. Was that the case for anyone else?
Same for me as well, just a quick black blur, then nothing.
Oreo’s training went well she so wanted a piece of the headless.
This was an awesome review, Spoony. I laughed my ass off. The black&white scroll-by of Avatar virtues while you murder children with a battleaxe was an exceptionally nice touch.
Can’t wait to see you tear down IX
So…how much does one of those straightjackets run?
The time off has served you well Spoony! Another GREAT review! Not that anything you released in 2011 was in any way a disappointment, but you can tell that you have a renewed vigor in this review… looking forward to great things to come out of the Spoony Experiment in 2012!
I really dont get what everyone is complaining about. 30 Seconds is too much for your impatient asses to continue your FREE entertainment?
Dog > Headless! xD rock on spoony
Good to have ya back Spoon, and in full force. We’ve missed you, whatever you need to do keep doin’ the awesome that you do is fine by me.
I’ve never played any Ultima ever(nor will i) but I loved this retrospective I’ll be bummed out when it’s over honestly. I didn’t mind the midroll especially since you’ve done things like insanity breaks before so at least now the “break” part is literal and not you going down to the kitchen for lemon candies. i was a little annoyed the mid roll actually started when you came back and were mid-sentence but only cuz it ruined your joke by being delayed. I respect the crap out of you and have probably watched everything posted twice. You, NC, Linkara helped me get through a really depressing time last year and I’d willingly watch any ad you guys put up.
SO MUCH POTENTIAL, games that fail yet had so much potential are worse than any other type of game.
Before these reviews, I didn’t know much about Ultima. It’s been fun to see you go through the series and to see the changes in the game over time. Like Paw and the King’s Quest series, one really needs to see it in its glory days in order to understand how truly horrible the finale game is. And considering that Mask of Eternity looks ten time more playable than this one, lord knows what awaits us for Ascension. While I’ll be sad to see it end, I am sure this last one is sure to be epic.
Great review! And it looks like your padawan learner’s training is paying off. Apparently all the Avatar needed in Ultima Underworld: Labyrinth of Worlds was to find the Jedi master and get trained in the force (And props to Miles forgetting beat up for our amusement).
This was great. The Ultima reviews, alongside the Highlander CD-I game review and the Highlander movies reviews, are basically what got me into this site. I’m happy to see them continue and am excited to finally see your review of Ultima 9.
I suggest you make this a proper finale. No simple review here… a real conclusion to your Ultima reviews.
Adblock disabled. I support the Spoony. Because I’m just that cool.
And my ax!
What do you want, a cookie?
But what, you don’t support anyone else who makes stuff?
Guessing its games like this that caused RPGs to move to consoles.
Waaay too early for that. It certainly hurt the genre though and it took Bioware to restart it with the incredible Baldur’s Gate series.
Your character kind of looks like Dirk the Daring.
Finally, a new Ultima game review by the Spoony One!
I really appreciate all your works and the laughter it brings with, man. ^lolz
You, scream and swear in a review? Spoony, perish the thought! XD
All sarcasm aside, this game feels like a giant let down from something awesome. I feel your pain.
And also, Oreo’s reaction at the end was absolutely hilarious.
I’m disappointed you didn’t have clip from AVN Nerds Infra-man review, where he just keeps saying BOOOM!!!!
Glad you’re back, babycakes.
Your review brought back some horrible memories, and made laugh so hard that I almost broke a rib. Fantastic work. U8′s fail-jumping followed by instant drowning was some of the worst game-play I’ve ever experienced. I don’t hate a lot of games, but yes, I did hate this one. Of course, it might be because I was head-over-heels in love with the earlier Ultimas… Looking forward to you eviscerating U9!
I think it was meant to be a bit over the top because some parents (and in my case grandparents) had beyond over reactions to these games. My grandmother went so far as to say that some woman at a church meeting picked her out and knew my uncle (her son) was playing D&D and made me swar to never play it… like under penalty of being possessed or something
I forgot to note, good use of the StarTropics. Yeah, you can’t slip that game by me.
Anyways, I’ve enjoyed all of the retrospective despite having missed out on the series. Like someone noted before regarding Paw and King’s Quest there’s nothing that can be better than seeing a true fan going step by step through their classic series. And of course it doesn’t hurt that each episode has been so complete. Must be good if I sit for 30 minutes and don’t even notice 30 minutes have ticked by.
BOOM! JUMP! Whack-a-zombie! This game had a trifecta of terrible!
If someone else already mentioned this, I’m sorry, but…
From what I’ve read, the place you and up at the end of this game isn’t a Guardian-conquered Britannia but he Guardian’s home world, because that’s where Ultima 9 was supposed to take place – but that was changed among many freak-ups that happened in the game’s production. So that’s actually WORSE that what you suggested: Instead of you returning to Britannia and it being nothing like what is was at the end of 8, you end 8 arriving at one place and then start 9 somewhere else altogether!!!
On another note: Wow, what a long, beautifully planned set-up. So there was a reason all along for all these reviews besides just nostalgia. Take that, everyone who whined about the Ultima reviews not having enough of Spoony’s trademark ranting – NEVER DOUBT THE SPOONY ONE!!!!!
Yeah, Pagan was a bit of a letdown in terms of gameplay and initial (pre-patch) quality. But, honestly, I don’t blame Lord British for this. As he’s stated in interviews regarding Pagan and Ascension, he had very little creative control over the games and, quote, “let people tell him what to do.” The people I blame, and always will, are the executives of Electronic Arts who oversaw Origin. For screwing up Pagan, and allowing the nigh-unplayable travesty that was Ascension, I can not, and will not forgive them.
I would -love- to see Lord British do a remake of those two games, if nothing else Ultima-related. Bring out the true potential of Pagan, and give the series the capstone it deserves.
The game would be so easy if you could just play as Oreo.
The guy who planned this game went to exile in a grey cave.
Then he returned and made Skyrim.
I am very glad to see that Spoony still got it.
better voice acting,
the jokes work, all of them,
clever use of well made FX, they are getting better every video,
How much dust did you have to blow off of that intro?
Man..it’s been a while. :P
Man… I mean I like Andrew Dickman and all, but that doesn’t look a damn thing like you. Which is weird because he’s actually really good at likenesses…
I have to admit, this game is a guilty pleasure. I’ve played through it several times because I like the idea of the Avatar eventually reaching the pinnacle of his power so he can finally take on the Guardian. I also enjoyed the idea of playing the Avatar in a completely foreign land.
I remember when I first got it and played it pre-patch, taking me forever to beat it, but yeah I eventually did. Every time after that I played it with the patch and with a guide book. Which the second best weapon in the game can bet obtained about 15 minutes into the game. And it is only good because if I remember correctly it gives a 10% instant kill chance. The only thing better is the flame sting because it prevents enemies from attacking you due to the two hits it provides.
But I still like this game, it is not as good as the 7′s but better than the mess that would be Ultima 9. I remember reading that the game was rewritten several times and Lord British did not have much input into the story of the game. And I believe I read an interview with one of the original writers and there were plans to incorporate stuff from Pagan into Ascension such as summoning the Titans you subdued to help you fight the Guardian and eventually resorting to destroying Britiania to kill the Guardian.
I WANT MY ONE HOUR LONG REVIEW OF ULTIMA IX!
I just wanted to share that Ultima couldn’t even get their demonic symbols right. That pentagram isn’t flipped upside down, so it’s actually still the symbol of protection, not the symbol of destruction. It sucks that they tried to pass it off as such, because it furthers the belief that the pentagram, no matter what angle it is at, is demonic and evil, just like the swastika, when it is only when they are mirrored or flipped, that they become those dark symbols.
The pentagram, whichever way it’s angled, has only tenuous connections to anything “demonic and evil.” That’s really the case for most of these symbols. Even the upside down cross was originally a christian symbol — one of humility. Some of the early Christians, that were crucified, even requested being put on an upside down cross to prove they were beneath their savior.
The pentagram, on the other hand, was mostly just thought of a sort of pretty symbol, so it was used often in decoration. There was no real system as to which way it pointed.
For an actual symbol that was heavily steeped in magic and ritual, look no further than the “magic square” you were shown in school. That was back when mathematics was considered to border on actual magic. Pythagoras himself was considered, by himself and others, to be a wizard of sorts, and his school combined both magic and math.
TLDR; pentagram isn’t really that magical, many dark symbols have innocent origins, mathemagics was a thing.
If you go new age, then yeah. Ton of rules for all this crap. Usually not that well researched.
Aye, much like the constant misunderstanding of the upside down crucifix. Not Satan – Saint Peter. Even then it’s widely agreed that the crucifix shape Christians use is wrong, it should be a T.
Not that Christians would worship an idol or anything.
Not to mention the whole misuse of the word Pagan. But it seems the *least* of the game’s faults…
That was fucking funny man! Still got the magic! Hope you’re feeling better.
Although I do have some fond (and many frustrating) memories of Ultima 8, I loved this review. As for the ads, I’d prefer them in the beginning of the video rather than in the middle, but whatever works.
I kinda liked the molotovs/death disks. Sure, it meant you had to keep your backpack open in combat, but it never seemed like that big a hassle to me.
I also liked stealing from everyone. I guess it was just fun to be bad for once. The other Ultima games were really bad when it came to forcing a set of morals on you. This sometimes felt forced, considering the stakes of each game. Fate of the world(s), yadda yadda.
That said, the game was really bugged to hell and back, and it was incredibly rushed, like the review mentioned. A shame, since it did have some promise.
Anyway, there was one thing you could do to make combat a little more bearable: Get the Slayer. It’s a magical mace you can find if you go exploring a bit, and while it didn’t have the best damage bonuses, it had a chance to instantly kill the enemy. This basically reduced combat to 1-5 attacks.
Why doesn’t the Guardian just, you know, smush you to death?
Jesus christ alfuckingmighty, that voice acting is hideous.
I just noticed the wee Zero Punctuation imps! Are they new?
OREO IS ADORABLE.
This is easily your best review in quite a while.
Damn, that’s horrible. I did read up about Ultima VIII and IX, but that was worse than I have expected. No wonder the franchise got killed.
I am kind of curious, but what’s the big deal into including a gameplay mechanic that is out of place, such as platforming in a rpg game? It kinds of breaks the flow of the game (or something like that) and most likely incompatible with the gameplay’s mechanics of the rest of the game, especially about bugs and glitches. I believe an example could be with Shadow Warrior, where there’s parts of levels that you have to jump on platforms. Since it was a FPS, it was pretty hard to do so and usually fall for your death and/or in the lava.
Is it me, or the graphics looks like a port for Game Boy advance, or something like that? Anyway, nice review, as always. Can’t wait for your Ultima IX review. :P
the disparity of hardware on handhelds and a proper computer is quite immense if you think about it.
I am aware of that. I was just talking about the graphics that reminds me of a game boy advance game. Sorry if it wasn’t clear.
I meant it as a food for thought comment rather than a critizem :)
Oh, err… Nothing to see there *run away*. :P
Extra ad or no extra ad, its awesome to have spoony updates
<3 u man, cant wait to see 9
Thanks so much! Loved the review. Can’t wait for part IX.
Please publish all videos exactly like this one! Ads on the web and was auto-downloaded to my Tivo since it was published to the RSS as an MP4. Like enjoying Spoony Reviews with some popcorn on the couch.
A lot of people are angry that TGWTG needs to have this new mid-video commercial. They blame it on the decline on the site. But how can the site be declining?
In the first month of 2012, the big names on the site are averaging about 4-6 reviews. That’s a pretty good production rate, about one video a week. And they’re all pretty good quality, that’s not an issue. So WTF is going on?! Is Blip reducing the amount of money their ad revenues generate? Where is the money going?
I stopped to watch stuff on TGWTG about mid-2011, because they started adding more producers that I can’t watch because either they bore me or I cannot agree with anything they say (e.g. those Music Critics, Hagan, MarzGurl, Sad Panda etc). I used to watch every vid every day, now barely one every other day. Usually I go directly to the individual homepages anyway (like Spoony, Linkara, Brad or Chuck from SFDebris).
This is just my opinion, but maybe others feel the same tho.
I apologize for the english, I am not a native speaker :)
Here’s my personal shit list of reviewers:
The Last Angry Geek
That Sci-Fi Guy
I don’t really watch a lot of Marzgurl, so I don’t have an opinion of here. I’m okay with Todd In The Shadows, but I always feel like he’s just trying to find snarky, mean-spirited excuses to say he hated a song, rather than just judging the songs merits.
Example: “Tonight, Tonight” is a harmless song that can easily be tuned out whenever it pops up on the radio. The only way this song could possibly hurt is if you were forced to listen to it over and over.
Unfortunately, Todd probably DID listen to it over and over, as he was editing the clips of the review together. So he’s probably biased against bland, ignorable songs that only hurt if you FORCE yourself to listen.
I guess it’s entirely plausible that they failed to realise their work was always going to be a fad bubble that would one day eventually burst.
There’s only so long you can be the new thing before people eventually grow tired of you and move onto the next new thing. It’s also Channel Awesome is just overstretching their reach, taking on too many people and trying to do too many things which will eventually just make them collapse under their own weight.
Still, if you use Firefox and have some kind of adblocker on, you don’t even see the adverts. I know I don’t.
I heard Blip’s payments are down.
It’s great to have Spoony back! (Also, I can’t believe some people are complaining about having to watch an extra commercial….my mind is blown by that). As always Spoony, great review, I love you, please marry me ;)
I don’t mind the ad, but in the future, could it possibly be placed a little more strategically? There was a static part of the video not too long before the advertisement was placed, and this would have been a better place than right in the middle of when you were speaking. Or maybe you could add in a sort of ad cutaway joke like NC does, but I feel like this video was in production prior to the decision of adding the midvideo ads.
The video was posted a couple/a few hours before he put the ad in. I watched it before the ad was added. So yeh, your feeling is correct.
Wait, Ultima 9 is even a bigger betrayal than 8? Uh, is it even a bigger betrayal than the XCOM FPS Sequel/Prequel 50s Non-Tactical Game?
oh god those were bad…
why does anyone even give a [yay] about the X-Com FPS when there’s an actual X-Com remake being made by firaxis?
Because Spoony screamed “BETRAYAL!” in the middle of E3 ’10, and until I see him in the middle of Richard Garriote’s Living Room doing the same, I’m not sure it could be claimed to be as big a betrayal.
off topic but i love your avatar
I don’t mind the ad, but I can see why others might be annoyed. Perhaps Spoony should increase his content output (actual reviews, not cameos or Oreo vids) if he needs to make money.
Most of his fellow reviewers on TGWTG manage to post at least one video a week. If NC, Phelous and Cinema Snob can do it, then it’s clearly achievable. And if Spoony can’t manage full reviews for personal reasons, then how about bringing back Vlogs or Let’s Play? They would take much less work than a regular review.
Or Counter Monkey. Me loves Counter Monkey.
That’s not a fair comparison at all. NC, Phelous and Cinema Snob review movies, and as bad as they may be, they only have to deal with those for two hours per view, and then work on the script and editing. RPGs, on the other hand, can take over 20 hours, and that’s for some of the faster ones (which is not the case with Final Fantasy or most Ultimas at all). In other words, you could theoretically watch the same movie 10 times by the time Spoony is done playing an RPG once (and that’s when he is in tip-top shape). Notice that most game reviews on TGWTG are approximately magazine article length or short introductions (Shorties). Video Games Awesome does more elongated Let’s Plays, but no one in their right mind would argue that they are finished quickly and efficiently. That is because they have to entertain their audience and play the game at the same time, no time for scripts.
Now you can argue that Spoony should cover more movies, but remember that the site tries to do both, and that a lot of his fans ask him for RPG reviews. The last time he covered a game in this style was FF X-2 back in July 2011 and the last time he updated the Ultima retrospective was in late May 2011, so he has definitely being doing many more movies than games. Let’s Plays like Phantasmagoria do require some preparation beforehand and the ones that do not are on his game streaming page.
So all the levels are grey and all you fight is zombies? It’s like a glimpse into the future.
Oh my, a new video! Better enjoy it boys, it’ll be six months until next one
Or two to three weeks, as has been his pace at any time where he didn’t specifically say he was taking it easy due to personal problems.
I don’t really get why you even come to the site if you see a new video and your only comment on it is to be snarky. If you hate Spoony and hate the Spoony Experiment, why not just watch something else?
Its a good sign if you think about it. People still enjoy and respect spoony’s work. Just wish he wasn’t so slow in making stuff haha
Just sayin’. To me its a valid point.
I like Noah and his experiment, when he upload videos that is.
I got twitter solely for Spoony, you should too. You would know that the next vid is the FFX-2 finale on the 11th.
Well, with this much build-up, I really, really can’t wait for your Ultima 9 review :) Especially, because a close friend of mine enjoyed it a lot – I figure he never played any one of the preceding titles 1-8.
Btw, I don’t like ads, but if it helps, I think we Adblock users should be quite easily able to add an exception to your site… *clickedyclick*. done.
I wish I had ads, I almost feel guilty for being Swedish and not receiving ads. Watching or hearing ads is my favourite way of helping the shows I like.
Well it seems, I have the same “problem” here in Germany. I disabled Adblock for this site and even tried deactivating NoScript…but there still is no Ad to be seen at the marked spot, the “meds” break. Sorry, Spoony :/
I know the feeling about trying to explain how certain games aren’t evil to my mom: I had one hell of a time trying to convince her that I wasn’t going to turn out to be some sort of violent thug from playing “Street Fighter 2.” And I thought when my dad caught me at an arcade, playing “Mortal Kombat 2,” while performing Baraka’s impalement fatality, at the most opportuned moment, he would’ve thrown my ass to church to confess my “sins.” Instead, he just laughed his ass off and helped me to get my mom to relax on the issue.
(Yes, he totally had a giggle fit at that moment! He was weirdly awesome that way!)
This series is what got me into computerized rpg ( well tbh this one and bards tale) i started with Ultima 4 and played all but 5 and 9 and uo ( i remember thinking with the announcement of Ultima Online that i was angry the series was coming to an end and that this new online game playing would never catch on :P )
Yeah! Spoony’s back!
You have to wonder if Oreo could have predicted what she’d be seeing when Noah brought her home. :)
That Terry “Spoony” Bogard (Bogart?) poster is just awesome.
This game looks like it’s incredible frustrating! >_< And I'm sure my brother can relate to explaining to my parents that the games he's playing are not going to make him psycho. I'll admit I never had the problem since I kinda became a gamer rather late, but when my brother was younger he had some issues trying to get games he wanted to play.
And every single chest explodes? Man, Pagan must have terrible issues with people's houses getting burned down because of those!Lol, and it looks like Oreo is the master at taking down a headless! Forget the weapons in Ultima Underworld, all you needed was Oreo! XD
Got headless monsters? Throw some cookies at them!
-Waking up from a nap
-Looking on teh interwebz for something to accompany dinner
-Finding a new Spoony’s game review after a long hiaust
Rush of nostalgia, but not because of the game itself, but because the song “Cave” from Star Tropics used in the video. If this game actually had Star Tropics’ music in it, it wouldn’t be this bad…
It blows my mind that people would complain about ads:
Standard TV Show= 8 minutes out of 30 = 26% Ad time
This video w/ 2 ads = 1 minute out of 30 = 3% Ad time
Well, some of us are British and have the BBC. 0% advert time; a 30 minute show runs for 30 minutes, imagine! Still, you make a fair point.
I pay a TV license to the BBC every month whether I want to or not even though the only shows I’ve watched on it in the last five years are series 1 and 2 of Stewart Lee’s comedy vehicle. I would rather have ads then pay money to support some thing I don’t watch.
Doctor Who, F1, Top Gear. (Also, I don’t own a TV and don’t watch stuff live on Iplayer. All the BBC, none of the fee.)
I don’t know how it is now, but BBC used to have some nice documentaries (I watched one about Einstein on youtube and found it very good; also, the one about Fermat’s Last Theorem was interesting). You should see my country’s (Brazil) public TV: nobody watches it, it produces nothing worth of it’s money, and it never produced since it was created.
True, but then again Spoony isn’t subsidized by the government.
He should be.
i agree, i just mute it.
this is amazing i CANT wait for Ultima IX
Way to make me feel old there; I remember floppies and dialing up to BBSes back in the not so distant past. Heck, until a couple of years ago, I still had several big storage cases filled with floppies, 3.5″ and 5.25″ both.
Still, great job! I’m insatiably curious to see just how bad 9 is now.
Yeah…made me feel kinda old, too. But kinda proud of it like, “Yeah, I took BASIC programming in high school, baby, and that made us *fancy*, and then we played Zork off a cassette tape when we were done, typing everything out on our expensive new TRS-80s.” Man, those were the days. Hiding out in the computer room before anyone even knew what Geeks were, so they wouldn’t think to look there…
Ah yes, and BBSes… I still have floppies of shit I downloaded off BBSes. :D I feel ya, Sniper.
I hate EA too. It’s like what’s happening with The Sims. The original game is an all time classic to me, but during the Sims 2, when Maxis completely dissolved into EA the quality started to dive. The Sims 3, while not a bad game in and of itself, is HORRENDOUSLY maintained and tested. Each expansion pack is rushed out before they can be properly debugged and the patches rarely fix the biggest issues and often add new ones, it’s pathetic.
After watching this my greatest fear is that EA will get their grubby hands on something like the Elder Scrolls and fuck it up too.
They figured they can milk sports and FPS franchises to make tons of money without trying too hard, so why should they bother?
For me, as long as NISA, Atlus and those Working Design-esques publishers keep doing their business, fuck EA, Capcom and the likes. But probably they’ll go under while those big shots ruin everything. I mean, look at Demon’s Soul: Atlus took the risk localizing a hardcore RPG, and when it proved to be a success, Namco-Bandai replaced them to localize Dark Soul.
…Wait, Ultima 9 was the reason behind all of this? Really?…Well it MUST be bad for the kinda build up yer giving it as a bad game. And frankly, if it’s a bigger betrayal to the series than anything seen up to now…I find myself both eager and actually a little afraid to see it.
Well, that, and as Noah seems to be a big fan of the series, he figured he could make videos about games he really likes for a change.
But that would be Noah’s reasons; Spoony just wants vengeance for the BETRAAAAYAL.
Hey, I know this f*cker! That’s the Avatar is from a great strategy game called Dungeon Keeper, I’m sure you’ve heard of it. The Avatar is a sort of a final boss (it’s a strategy game, so it’s weird to call units “bosses”) and this guy is almost indestructible, or even… godlike, I might say? It’s funny to see a game in which you actually play as him and are in full control of him.
im still waiting on my 2 tee shirts
of course that’s gonna take a while, Oreo isn’t like Interceptor from FFVI, no random counterattacking one shots
also lies, two commercials, although it would be funny to have the insanity breaks or home shopping network Doctor Insano commercials again
You know, there were a time when people complained because Spoony would make videos with cameos from his friends/fellow collaborators from TGWTG and other sites. Because you know, Sage sucks, Pat the NES Punk sucks, Linkara sucks, Film Brain sucks bollocks (because he is British, get it?), and so on.
Then people started to complain that Spoony was making too many vlogs, and like Lex Luthor stealing forty pies that are as many as four times ten, That`s Terrible.
Now people complains that Spoony is trying to make some money of his site and videos with adds and such. I mean, why does he need money? To make a living out of his work? Why doesn’t he find a REAL work with his Computorz degree or something? It’s not like economy is crumbling in US and a 9-to-5 job would probably render him without energy to script, shoot and edit videos in his spare time. Can’t you feed yourself by photosynthesis or something? Or maybe live parasiting your brother? That’s what brothers are good for, right?
Screw that, I’m calling the next step: I’ll complain that Spoony is alive. I mean, think on how much money he would save if he was dead. And maybe his videos would be ready earlier, because a dead Spoony wouldn’t need to sleep. That way, we could watch his videos without ads and like one new video per week. That would be great, right?
So, who’s with me on this?
An excellent illustration of Insane Troll Logic, good Sir.
You just used a TV Tropes trope. Fuck off back to your basement
You first, dipshit.
I disagree. Being dead is not going to get videos done, he needs to turn into a brainwashed zombie. That’s the only way he can save money, have no sleep, no life, no food (other than brains) and no ads. Who cares if it starts the zombie apocalypse? The videos are more important.
When I grow up I want to be like you.
There is worse than Film Brain. Like Guru Larry. At least Film Brain is smart, and knows haw to deliver scripted lines in a way that doesn’t make him sound like a cardboard cutout. Yeah, he drones when he speaks. But Guru Larry’s accent is worse, like he’s gargling his own nut sack.
So don’t watch. Simple.
oh fuck yeah! wait… what?
It feels so damn good to have game reviews back. And that scene with Platoon’s soundtrack killed me. Awesome.
Hey, Ultima IX’s coming up? This oughta be good.
Oh, and by the way: the guys putting the ads in the middle of the video will probably start to make the videos as to adapt around it (putting it between some kind of transition) to avoid cutting the review mid phrase or something. Chill down, people. It’s new, and everybody will try to adapt. Give the guys some time, and also some chance to make money with their work.
And if you think that’s not real work and it shouldn’t be rewarded: try to make your own videos, in a quality level similar to Spoony, Channel Awesome, and so on, and then you come back and tell us what’s like. If it’s really easy and you can do it while working your ass off in an office or somehing like that, then I’ll join you in your anti-ad campaing.
“All I wanted was to play Pagan, but she wouldn’t get it for me. She wouldn’t get it for me.”
“I’M NOT CRAZY!!!” ;)
SPOOONY! This game looks aweful i have only played 4 but i don’t think i will ever play this…thing. Oreo is so cute. i’m glad you seem to be in a good mood despite these crappy games.
finally remembered that song in the backround when he first started showing the gameplay.
starting at around 1:24. its an ocremix i’ve heard from secret of mana, been driving me crazy trying to remember XD
Didn’t Entrepreneur magazine print an article that showed Doug from thatguywiththeglasses made over $150,000 a month from his site/videos? (that also feature spoony)
An amount that has probably even raised quite a bit by now..
Somehow I have to question…
You would spot a difference if they were making Mitt Romney levels of money, dude. Better video quality, more production credits, etc.
I think that was the total revenue for the site, not what just his videos make. Also, the money made from Doug’s videos alone has to be divided among the staff that actually runs the site. Basically, his entire business was making $150,000 a month at the time. Even if the amount has raised considerably by now, the amount that each employee receives (including Doug himself) is only a very small portion of that total amount.
So what your saying…is that TGWTG has too many shitty reviewers…and need to get rid of them…so more money will go to the people who actually have talent?
SOUNDS LIKE A PLAN!!! Here a list of bad reviewers that I think EVERYONE can agree on. Let me know if you want to add to the list:
The Last Angry Geek
That Sci-Fi Guy
Nostalgia Chick (maybe)
Blockbuster Buster (maybe)
No, those people only make money off their own videos. He was talking about the non video making crew for the site like Doug’s brother getting a cut of the money from the site.
According to the TGWTG Wiki, That SciFi Guy, Hagan, NChick, and the Blockbuster Buster are part of Team TGWTG. So they should both be getting a cut of the money.
Here’s a more accurate list of TGWTG alumni who might have to be cut to save the site:
That Sci-Fi Guy
Nostalgia Chick (maybe)
Blockbuster Buster (maybe)
..MikeJ isn’t that bad, he just needs a new camera >.>
..MikeJ isn’t THAT bad, he just needs a new camera >.>
HANG ON A SECOND…I just made an awkward segway into my next observation. Ugh…
Oh, and add Guru Larry to the list. He’s only funny in his unscripted Let’s Plays, and feels like a piece of cardboard when he gives a scripted review of a video game.
Walker gets most of the traffic. That’s why he gets that kind of money. If you go on blip, you’ll see Nostalgia Critic highlighted because the show inadvertently made blip.tv a successful site.
Are you sure of that? Because I though Blip just highlighted videos related to producers you frequently visit.
4 years ago perhaps.I doubt that kind of money is floating around now.
no idea on his numbers now but I do know that for things like the anniversary, he/his site funds the travel and housing of the people who participate. Even if people aren’t huge fans of them he is doing something with the revenue monies
Note there was one thing that Spoony didn’t complain about: The music.
The music to PAGAN was actually…pretty good! However, it was the ONLY good thing from this godforsaken piece of crap game.
LOL… I can tell Spoony never got to play this game hardcore. You haven’t truly experienced Ultima 8 until you have played the original un-patched floppy version on the minimum system, a 486 SX-25 with 4 MB of RAM. Only then will you know what pain is.
What Spoony left out what that not only did you have to save at every fricking jump, but that saving and loading took FOREEEEVER. It was so freaking slooowwww. Saving your game would take at least 30 seconds and loading would be more than a minute. When you’re falling into the water and saving / loading every two minutes, this is excruciating. The earth maze traumatized me almost to the point of madness.
You know what though? For all its horrors, I actually enjoyed that game. Was it a great game? No way. But it had many bright points. The bizarre and creative magic system, random items that you didn’t know what they did, magic mushrooms that you could eat that made you drunk, beautiful graphics and great music…
I loved how you could just bash open key doors without bothering to find the key by using a golem spell on a speck of dirt – even doors that were supposed to only open after completing a quest. You could summon trolls, beat them up to steal their money and then summon them again to make infinite money. You could use the titan’s items on the titans when you first meet them to transport you to the ethereal plan almost at the beginning of the game (which would then cause a game crash). Even though the plot required you to give up your air magic almost as soon as you got it, you could actually circumvent this by doing a weird scrolling trick with Stratos and thereby keep your air magic for the rest of the game! To steal from villagers, you couldn’t open their treasure chests or take what was in it without triggering the wizard but you could steal the actual chest itself by moving it out of their homes. If you stole and teleported at the same time you could materialize on the other side in pieces…
There were just so many goofy glitches to exploit. Unlike many RPG’s, this one didn’t feel like there were invisible restrictions. The game pretty much allowed you to do anything that you could get away with, no matter how crazy or illogical.
In my opinion, this series didn’t truly lose its soul until Ultima 9. Ultima 8 was obviously not even close to Ultima 7, but damn was it fun in its own excruciating way.
Great review. Favorite part was the 1812 overture set to exploding chests XD
I’m not a big fan of ads, but I can totally understand why they are there… and he is giving us a fair heads-up about the ad in the middle. Noah doesn’t, nor shouldn’t work for free (and yes, even if it’s a labour of love, it’s still hard work). The only possible objection I would ever have is if he ever started screwing with the content to attract larger ad dollars, then I’d stop watching. Otherwise, I’ll sit though a minute’s worth of ads in a half-hour video. For the hours of entertainment he provides for free, I think it’s more than fair. Hell, I’ll watch a shitload of commercials in an hour of television that’s half as entertaining and not bitch about it… why bitch here? The revenue is going to someone who genuinely deserves it.
If you have an ad blocker does that stop spoony making money off ads?
My understanding is yes, it does.
Alright thank you I won’t be using ad-blockers for this website then.
Fun video as always. Thanks! Now I’ve gotta go back and watch all the previous Ultima reviews in a massive Ultima Marathon.
And if you need midroll ads, or any ads, you go ahead and do it. I’ll gladly point my eyeballs at ads to “pay for’ something free that I really dig, ya know? You seem to be using it well besides, as another set-up for a joke, so it just seems like extra entertainment to me.
Actually, mercilessly slaughtering children is not a new thing in the Ultima series. It started as far back as U5, I remember one instance in U7.1, and I’m told it happened somewhere in U6, although I’ve never played through that one.
In Ultima 5, in pretty deep in Hythloth, you encounter a room inexplicably full of hostile children. It’s even creepier in U5: Lazarus, because there, you hear children laughing as you approach, and you hear their screams as you and your companions cut them down. . . . Oh God! That was disturbing!
It looked well-placed, and intentionally placed to me. I thought it totally worked; the static interruption followed by the “oops! We’ll-be-right-back card” is a common gag.
…am I the only one who thinks the title card makes Spoony look quite a bit like Shaggy from Scooby Doo?
No, lots of other people said that in his “Top 11 Spoony Moments of 2011″, me being the first.
Look on the bright side: lots of people, with no contact or help from each other, independently looked at the title card, and thought “Shaggy Rogers”. So that just means were right.
Crud. Meant this as a reply to the comment about the ad being badly placed. :P
How has nobody mentioned this yet?
Spoony is just like hat McCulloch. He had to kill those 23 babies in self defense.
At least you guys are trying to add a little humor about the ad situation. A 1 or so minute commercial for free entertainment? I’d rather have that then how bad television is with commercials. And is it weird I kept expecting a Dragon Age 2 joke in the beginning?
So is he only going through the 10 that the ultima pack came with, or every single one of the ultima games? Cuz I wanna see that samurai one. It looks bad ass. -Hums theme to “Samurai Jack”-
XD spoony, I love that Homer Simpson scream. “What…..Doughnuts dont exist?! NOOOOOOOO, NOOOOOOOOOOOO, NOOOOOOOOOOOOO, AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!”
Great review. Loved it.
Yay! Good to see you again Spoony. It’s always great when a new video of yours comes out. When do you think you’ll have the next video ready, not to rush you or anything like that.
Sigh…I wasn’t even aware of Electronic Arts being responsible for murdering Ultima as well.
If there is any one company that needs to die for their sins at this point, it’s EA.
And I thought their consumption of Westwood was a crime…
To be fair, in the last 2 or 3 years, they’ve gotten a bit better. However, to me, as a massive C&C fan (ask me anything about the lore and I’ll likely know the answer), the consumption of Westwood is unforgivable.
Gotta say, the new Evil Corporation of gaming is Activision-Blizzard. Not necessarily the Blizzard part (one, I have no strong feelings one way or the other about their games [also, tell my wife I said... hello.], two, I don’t want to awake the rabid Blizzard fans here), but definitely the recent Activision part. Call of Duty’s continued, annoying dominance, and the death of what was a good series in Guitar Hero (especially as a rock fan) is a far worse current phenomenon than destroying two companies over a decade ago.
As bad as Activision-Blizzard has become (oh, they’re just about as bad as EA) any argument I could make about EA getting better dies in my throat because of Origin.
It’s nothing but corporate spyware with a vaguely defined EULA…and even when you look past that, it’s just more DRM that provides no incentive to the customer to use it (except the fact that EA plans on forcing you to use it…it’s Steam and Valve all over again).
There is nothing it provides that I can’t just get somewhere else.
Be fair to Steam – it works pretty well these days and you can often find games for dirt cheap on there. Typically, a game going on sale there is what leads me to buying it, as opposed to pirating it (since I don’t have a stable income).
Honestly, Origin is a lot like Stardock’s failure of an attempt at launching a Steam-like platform, Impulse. It probably won’t succeed and will eventually be taken down. That said, it is annoying as hell while it continues to exist.
I’d say Activision’s activities have been far worse as of late than… really, anything EA ever did. Activision friggin’ ran a fairly decent shooter series into the ground after it got some popularity, and then took one of the biggest up-and-coming genres in gaming and killed it with oversaturation. Did EA kill an entire genre? I don’t seem to recall that.
Oh, I use Steam quite extensively. But it still drives me nuts when I can’t get internet to verify for Offline Mode, denying me access to the games I paid for or have played before.
At least Valve seems interested in keeping their customers satisfied, and they aren’t lacking for any business.
EA, on the other hand, seems to do anything they can to screw people over when they feel they can get away with it.
Oh, I forgot about EA publishing BF3. Well, from a purely business standpoint, they are trying to compete with the biggest juggernaut not just in gaming, but in *entertainment history*. Seriously, CoD has made more money in initial releases than whole goddamn entertainment companies do in decades. Of course they’re going to steal concepts and force people to argue over which is better.
Now, if you’re like me, you’ll just jump on over to a modded Skyrim and Terraria and laugh at all the console gamers… but again, that’s just me.
stardock has sold impulse to gamestop now and it is only going to go down hill. impulse was actually a nice delivery system.
exploited battle system where you just spam your skills?.. sounds like skyrim you are all so fond of.. LMAO
Don’t you have to hit something in Skyrim when you try to boost destruction and/or one- or two-handed skills? If I remember correctly, in U8 all you had to do was hit thin air.
Exactly correct. Weapons, combat magic and armor skills – you know, half of the skills (these are: one-handed, two-handed, archery, block, light armor, heavy armor, destruction, conjuration, illusion) require you be in combat with something and hit it. And it takes a while.
You can’t just swing a sword for an hour and be at 100 one-handed, you have to go fight stuff, and you can’t just find a cave full of infinitely respawning rats to kill, as dungeons and such don’t immediately respawn (once you clear it, it takes 30 days to respawn IIRC, and at that point, it’s better to just go to another dungeon). Armor is even worse, since you have to *let yourself get hit* in order to level it up (can’t even block it with a heavy/light armor item, since that levels up your Block instead!).
The only skills that you can spam to level are the job skills (enchanting, smithing, alchemy), speech (which requires spamming the job skills), sneak (which is absurdly easy to level, yes), pickpocket (which requires successful pickpocketing and is useless anyway), and possibly alteration (transmute ore!). Lockpicking, while useful, can’t just be spammed, because it requires a locked chest, and you have to go into dungeons to find those (it levels up around the same rate as your weapons skills). Also, if you spam non-combat skills to level, you’ll be inevitably underpowered in combat, since your combat skills will be at the area of a level 2 or 3 character when you’re fighting level 10 monsters.
That said, I do prefer the XP system of most RPGs, and Oblivion became loads more fun when I used a mod that changed the game away from the use-skill-to-increase-it method. I imagine a similar mod will come out for Skyrim, and I’ll certainly use it once it’s out.
I’m not sure about skyrim, (haven’t gotten a chance to play it yet) but it does remind me of Morrowind, using a heavy book to push down the sneak button and walk forward to raise your skill lol. or jumping on the spot and gaining athletics.
Better yet, it reminds me of Final Fantasy tactics, savagely beating and healing your own team members to get job points. You can literally do this and gain enough JP to max out a job class in one battle, not to mention level up everyone to godlike status.
I think the only game I ever enjoyed attacking a practice dummy repeatedly for no reason was in the first room in Shadow Warrior lol… ugh, i’m getting old.. I hope i’m not the only one here who still remembers lines like “do you want to wash Wang? or watch Wang wash Wang?
The one fortune cookie message I remember the best is “Man who buy drowned cat pay for wet pussy.”
haha that just made my day. I wish i got fortune cookies that said that kinda stuff lol, all I ever get is… “you like chinese food”… and how do you argue with that!? It’s totally true.. not a fortune in any way!!! but totally true..
u have to be hitting something on an equal level to increase skills. Ignorant troll attempt
um no… conjuration you spam soul trap on a dead creature… restoration and alteration you get up at the same time by hurting yourself and healing yourself with both spells in hand… All your shielding and armor skills you can just go get some wolves and let them keep attacing you….smihing you just keep making iron hammers, illusion there is just a spell you keep spamming, and destruciton you just summon something and keep attacking it..
and oh ya those identical “grey” caves.. reminds me of skyrims identical brown ones and their identical puzzles….. LMAO..
Honestly why are we having this discussion?
Skyrim is loved, this is not.
The best part? Spoony said on his Twitter, quote:
“Anyone who attempts to compare Ultima 8′s leveling system to Skyrim’s is
either dumber than a broken staple gun, or has not played Skyrim.”
So, in other words FFXIII, go back to your silly JRPG.
Ah yes, grinding. In case you didn’t notice, all (most?) RPGs have grinding. Casting soul trap on a corpse is a glitch, alteration has nothing to do with damaging yourself, that’s destruction. Smithing is daggers not hammers and conjuration summons, not destruction. Spells you can grind at any time, but he was kind of right. Bows and melee need a living target. The caves aren’t brown and if they are for you, you need to fiddle with your settings. The caves aren’t identical, they can’t be, because each one is hand-made. They may be similar, but not identical. They made the identical puzzles because a lot of people are too stupid now and couldn’t solve the puzzles if they made them difficult and different. They probably also wanted to appeal to a wider audience and if they put in a bunch of puzzles, people like COD players wouldn’t play it. Even if the flaws that you pointed out were valid, they are easily overlooked by Skyrim being actually entertaining.
TL;DR: You don’t know what you’re talking about, your facts are messed up, and Skyrim is good.
“…LMAO…” <– That makes you look retarded.
What the fuck is up with the “LMAO” as if everyone’s being stupid?
Anyhow, I personally love when you get better with bows by using bows. It’s a system that makes a lot of sense. It’s realistic, really. Much more so than systems where you kill a rat with dagger, level up, and somehow get better at arcane magic* (although those have a certain charm to them as well, and Skyrim does KIND OF include that as well). I loved that about EverQuest (2 at least); for instance, I jumped down from heights as much as I could to get better at landing. Redundant it might seem, but it means I directly worked for it, and it wasn’t an award I received for doing something completely different. I loved that.
I did, initially, feel like the game was missing something because of its lack of “proper” attribute points, I admit. Because I do enjoy tinkering with such. But both systems work well… if done right. (And that’s key: If. Done. Right.)
*speaking from an in-world standpoint.
Uh, that’s actually Morrowind and Oblivion where you can grind your skills up at ludicrous rates…though why you would want to do that in Oblivion, I don’t know since leveling up is actually a BAD THING in that game.
Okay, I just watched the video, and know just how ridiculous you’re being now. Two things:
1) Spoony’s the one who made the complaints. Don’t act as if Skyrim fans have a double standard.
2) You’re forgetting something EXTREMELY key here: the complaint was not the system itself but how you’re encouraged to exploit it, and how it takes MINUTES to max out. That is not the case with Skyrim.
HOLY SHIT! LOOK ON THE SHELF!!!!!! YATZEE’S IMPS!!!!!!!!!!! :]
Love this one, and the whole Ultima retrospective. It’s hard to believe it’s been 5 years since Bayou Billy. 4 years since FMV Hell, which is when I started watching. Keep up the great work, and best of luck in 2012.
Wow great upload, i almost forgot u made reviews with the endless amounts of counter monkey clips. This is old school Spoony and its what i come here for, glad i didnt get disappointed
Spoony? Will you cover the MMO games too (Ultima Online, Ultima Online 2 and UXO)?
Didn’t Ultima Online 2 end up in the wastebasket long before it’s intended release? I was a UO player as kid, and I remember how the expected release got cancelled, and cannibalized into the existing Ultima Online.
Yeah, both, UXO and UO2 got canceled, but there are still vids about them online. He can still make mention them, if he does an UO vid. After all, UO looks and feels a lot like Ultima 8.
And I still play UO, now in its 15th year ;D
I mean…ads have been a part of on blip.tv shows since Day one….why are people still acting so shocked and appalled and uproarious NOW???
And I’m sure the note was MEANT to be tongue in cheek, but of course Internet nerds take shit way too seriously and literally, so they feel offended that Spoony DARRRRE add another 30s ad in the middle of a 30 minute video! “YOU’VE GONE TOO FAR NOW, SPOONY! TOOOOOOOO FARRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!”
Who else here wants to see Spoony review Ultima 5: Lazarus?
If you haven’t heard of it, it’s a fan remake done as a mod on the Dungeon Siege engine. I’ve played through it at least twice now, and it is fantastic. If you have any interest in the Ultima series, you should really give it a try.
Crap! I meant to include the link: http://www.u5lazarus.com/ . You need the original Dungeon Siege to play it, but you can get a decent used copy on Amazon for $10 including shipping. So worth it.
I’ve played it. It’s a great remake, in some ways even better than the original, although in combat gameplay it makes bows ridiculously overpowered.
On the other hand, the only way to survive the early stages and gather enough money to get better equipment is with those ridiculously overpowered bows. Heck, you have to snipe, run away until the enemy calms down and snipe again. You’re a serious wimp at the start.
ughgh i havent seen something more grey than Alex Rodriguez preformace…..great vid Spoony but oh Ultima 9 fist bump to you my man
Ultima 8 Spoony dont play that
I’ve waited so long for this…
I don’t know what to say. Thank you so much Spoony. That was a great review and your jokes were all great. I wanted to thank you for your effort. Doug’s review of Star Trek VII was painfully bad, but you saved my week.
I felt the same about the whole disneycember, I seriously couldn’t endure any of these videos and Star Trek reviews were also hard to watch too nitpicky and it all just feels forced. As for Spoony’s review, it was awesome, great pacing, great effects, sweet jokes, Miles and Oreo, couldn’t be any better. Got to love how “murdering small children with a battle axe and searching their bodies for a loot” becomes a new virtue, so funny.. and dark.
Honestly, to me…now, granted, I didn’t watch *ANY* of his
“Disney-cember” vids, but…with the Star Trek reviews at least, well…it seemed like the Critic’s main problem was…simply that he wasn’t or had never been a fan (of Trek). You know? He simply didn’t really know anything about the films or series that a fan would. For example, not knowing that you can’t beam thru shields, taking the odd-numbered Trek movie” thing WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY to literally, like, as if he’d only read the Wikipedia article on the subject and went from there reviewing Search for Spock (3) when he shouldn’t have and skipping Nemesis which he *SHOULD* review, etc. That kind of thing.
Like, I see what you mean by you saying the reviews appear “forced.” As in, it’s inappropriate for the Critic to be reviewing these films, and having *HIM* do it is what feels forced. Granted, he basically applied the same style he applies to those bullshit, obscure, nothing, bad films, and applied it to a review of a highly-well-known-and-beloved/hated-and-famous film series with a highly devoted fan base, and that’s something you just don’t do. Those two types of “bad media” really do require two very different styles of reviewing to do. I mean, even Spoony knows that you don’t tackle Highlander 2 using the same style that you would when tackling Santa with Muscles! I mean, you actually have to delve into the fan base and the background material and extended universe a little bit when making your complaints about the film/game! Again, contrast any of Spoony’s “Highlander” or FFVIII reviews with…say…his “Pumpkinhead,” AD&D, “Samurai Zombie Nation,” etc.
I mean, just imagine if Spoony had made his original FFVIII vids in this same “ignorant” kinda style that is more appropriate for reviews of nothing, more obscure games that the Critic used for his Trek reviews. Spoony would’ve been MASSECRED instead of LOVED by the Internets! (Because it would’ve seemed that his complaints were just stupid, uninformed nitpicks, and Spoony would’ve NEVER gained the audience that he did.)
Like, to me, it seemed that if those reviews had been done by Spoony, who was/is a knowledgeable fan, they’d be FAAAAAAAAAAAAAR better, funnier, and more epic…you know?
Like, this may just be one case where Linkara might be able to SAVE a bad review instead of kinda trashing a GOOD one! Maybe *HE* can inject some actual knowledge into that review! You know? (lol, j/k, but you still see kind of what I mean, right? lol)
NC’s mandate is to review movies he thought was bad that he remembers from his younger days. He does take the odd request for something like the room.
Doug wasn’t ever perceived as some nerd sci-fi guy(at least by me) so I doubt there’s any feeling of nostalgia from him towards any Star Trek series or movies. Even more so the idea of choosing only odd numbered ones based on premise of them being somewhat “bad” based on some opinions from the internet or meme just make him look even more as an impostor than a serious reviewer. Just why not take your time, watch all the movies, check out some series, do some actual research on the background and then review them all in a span of whole year instead of making yourself look like a total jackass.
I saw Linkara cameo in one of those Star Trek reviews and it was totally unsignificant I even felt sorry for a guy.
Nostalgia Critic style is great for reviewing some of the 90′s family movies that you don’t really get attached to or emotional with as you can just throw random jokes and you don’t have to care if it offends anybody. With series like Star Trek you better give actual complaints if you really need to or just shut the fuck up.
I would really like to see Nella from team Nostalgia Chick review Star Trek movies, but the problem is, she doesn’t have her own series, so probably it’s never gonna happen.
DUDE that was the Earthbound bus music!
God have I waited for this. Can’t wait till your review of 9 too. Also for a 30 minute video I think an add in the middle is appropriate. Anyone who is whining probably doesn’t have a real job. Can’t live without money, Spoony more then deserves to eat…and not sleep in a cardboard box…stuff like that you know.
Ultima VIII… kinda reminds me of Final Fantasy VIII. Is VIII just an unlucky number?
well friday the 13th part VIII sure did suck lol. The 8th bond movie was a roger moore one… it’s like watching secret Agent Grandpa. Then again Dragon Quest 8 was well recieved? Hard to say lol
Turns out spoony didnt need that sword all he needed was Oreo
also the Headless seems to be scared of Doggies
“Oh you want some? Oh you want some too?”
Trey Kincaid (Bruce Willis) from Apocalypse (PS1)?
Spoony! We missed you, man, keep ‘em coming!
Great video Spoony! Lookin good man! Glad to have you back! (well you have kinda been backish… but now its.. official..questionmark?) At any rate, looking forward to your next Ultima video for sure. Plus whatever else you can come up with.
I’m betting right now it was intentional, since Spoony doesn’t particularly look like that right now (he’s doing more of the Spoony Mullet look right now). The title card artist was bored and thought making him look like Shaggy would be a good laugh – and I’m totally cool with that.
…Harsh, much? Friggin’ Nostalgia Chick (even if only a maybe)? I can understand MikeJ, and definitely That Sci-Fi Guy, and a definite maybe on Blockbuster Buster (he’s incredibly inconsistent – sometimes he’s brilliant and other times he’s as bad as the movies he’s reviewing).
Considering that reviewers like Sci-Fi Guy are on Team Nostalgia’s PAYROLL, I think cutting the deadwood reviewers like him is a better option that increasing ad revenue.
I don’t have a problem with a 30 second interruption. But it’s clearly bad PR, because any interruption to the status quo more complicated than “I’m sick” is going to stir up the fans.
So on an image level, TGWTG should cut these losers, and make more room for better, fresh reviewers.
My oh my… The plot thickens. I feel that many will be pleased with Spoony making his way into the infuriating depths of the Ultima series. I had a chill when he was getting into 9… Cannot wait to see it. Good to have you goin, Spoony. And Miles and Oreo.
Don’t worry about the adverts for money Spoony; if you get donated 300,000 dollars by your fans, then you can start losing sleep over it.
Dude, I sat through commercials for fucking Smallville. I think I can sit through one for this. :)
Nonononononononono… Spoony PLEASE do not start with the title cards. The animated intro is corny enough. T_T
What’s wrong with the title card?
I see nothing wrong using title cards.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with them either, wtf?
ZOMG SPOONY’S DOING WHAT OTHER CRITICS ARE DOING- NOOOOOOOOOOOO! HOW DARE ANDREW DICKMAN EXPRESS HIS APPRECIATION OF E-REVIEWS BY DRAWING TITLE CARDS FOR REVIEWERS! END OF THE WOOOOOOOORLD.
Spoony has always been corny. Where have you been?
Yeah, better to show a title card than just a random screencap from the review, you know, for the background of the player while it’s still in its initial “movie hasn’t loaded — press play to start mode”…plus it looks WAAAAY better and cooler, too! ^_^
And superficially, it’s got the same drawing style as Penny Arcade, so it’s pretty fitting to boot.
And damn it looks good! Like, wow! ^_^
I love the title card it’s so bad… badass!
Ultima 9 is the reason I never played another Ultima game. I assumed they were all that bad.
the others are not bad. My personal favourites are the 2 underworld games; ultima 5 is quite good as well.
“What am I doing wrong? He keeps over shooting the fucking- COCKSUCKER!!”
I don’t think there was any franchise that kept its quality more than 3 times.
It’s never a good sign when a developer relies solely on one series for too
long. For example, Heroes of Might and Magic 4, Might and Magic 9, Final
Fantasy 13, Dragon Quest 9, and Ultima 9 have led respective companies towards the
My speculation is that devs make big mistakes like this because they are trying to
keep their franchise fresh. Although most of conservative and long running franchises
will likely be criticized for their unoriginality, they are the ones that keep
selling. A reason behind their action is unclear, but I guess they have just run out of ideas.
Can’t be sure about every franchise, but with Ultima they certainly didn’t fail when they wanted to keep it fresh. They always had a policy to use a completely new engine for new games, thus Serpent Isle was called “Ultima VII – 2″. They always tried something new, and while some games were better than others, they never ruined the franchise with it.
They failed because EA took over and had them release games before they were finished, and with restrictive publisher mandates.
Origin was fully aware of what was coming for them. By the time U7 came around, they already had conflicts with EA. In Ultima VII The Black Gate, the Guardian actually is portrayed with some characteristics of EA. Their Logo was a cube, tetrahedron and sphere – just like the constructs the Guardian uses to control Britannia’s people. The two murderers working for Batlin are called Elizabeth and Abraham.
Origin was one of the best studios out there, and Ultima one of the best game series – and the main reason I hate EA with a passion now.
Agreed. EA ruins franchises. Just look at how many companies and franchises they’ve ran into the ground? Bullfrog, Westwood, Maxis.. and now Bioware. Seriously, fucking hell how Bioware has fallen with its mediocre, half-assed shit like Dragon Age 2. And like every single other franchise that EA’s dug its claws into, the Dragon Age series is only gonna get worse, and based on what the info on Mass Effect 3 is and how badly TOR is doing, you can pretty much kiss Bioware goodbye since that’s what EA always does, “Uhh, uhh, it’s not OUR fault we ruined a perfectly good series, so we’re just going to shut down the studios and the franchises. Yup, we’re so cool.”
Uhhh….you’re right, in general, but you’re wrong about Bioware. EA is only *PUBLISHING* their games…they have no input on its *DEVELOPMENT*.
So basically, expect this to be a repeat of the “Spore” phenomenon. Remember how Spore was a badass AWESOME game that was nearly fucking RUINED by EA with their *HIGHLY* over-restrictive 3-install-only DRM that basically encouraged most players to pirate it in protest?
Same with Mass Effect 3. The game itself will be BADASS and AWESOME…its PC version’s *DISTRIBUTION* will just be a fucking GAY/RETARDED NIGHTMARE! Like, it’ll be a BADASS game, just, like w/Spore, you’ll have to pirate it to REALLY be able to enjoy it.
“Same with Mass Effect 3. The game itself will be BADASS and
AWESOME…its PC version’s *DISTRIBUTION* will just be a fucking
GAY/RETARDED NIGHTMARE! Like, it’ll be a BADASS game, just, like
w/Spore, you’ll have to pirate it to REALLY be able to enjoy it.”
Oh, I completely disagree. An RPG that’s been forced out in just barely around a year like Dragon Age 2, being headed off by David Gaider (the creative “genius” who was partly responsible for Dragon Age 2 turning out the way it did), a forced-in Multiplayer that nobody asked for, and then chopping the game up into three pieces to appeal to Shooter gamers or lazy casual gamers, with the gameplay – based on the footage they’ve been showing – being basically a Gears of War clone in all forms? There’s no way this game will be badass OR awesome.
What it will be is short. Painfully short. When you slice the game up into ‘Shooter Mode for the FPS fans, so there’s no RPG features, you just kill things and cutscenes play out without any decision making’, ‘Story Mode where the combat is made easy and you get a few dialogue otions’ and ‘RPG Mode, which is ME2 with weapon mods from ME1′, there is no way in hell that you will get a decent experience from a game that they produced within ONE year.
And alongside of being short, it will be missing a ton of content. Why? Because ever since EA took over, every single Bioware game HAS to come with DLC out the ass. Pointless, trivial DLC that they charge upwards of 8~10 bucks for just in order to get a single, crappy armor that becomes outdated by the time you reach the third mission in the first chapter.
And it IS EA’s doing, you know why? Because EA is the one making the calls here. They’re a publisher, but as a publisher, it’s up to them to decide whether they’ll put out a product, and whether they thing it’ll work. It’s EA who decides ‘we want you to crank out this game within a year and we don’t care if it isn’t finished yet’. It’s EA who made the announcement of ‘We want to make Dragon Age a yearly release product’.
Bioware never used to pull this shit before EA bought them, and considering that EVERYTHING that Bioware’s been doing wrong is exactly what EA’s been doing for years, I find it a little hard to believe that EA hasn’t been shoving its fist up their ass and working them like a sockpuppet.
Bioware only has itself to blame for it’s asinine 18 month development period. Also, it was the decision of Bioware to rotate the Lead Designer of DA:O to another project, and replace him with a guy who wanted to streamline the game to appeal to more people (despite the fact that DA:O sold better than Mass Effect). EA sucks as a developer, but with Dragon Age it actually took a risk in establishing a new IP that challenged Bethesda’s popular style of single player action RPGs in favor of an old school mechanic. EA isn’t short on cash, and they have a huge loyal fanbase of RPG enthusiasts thanks to Bioware’s KOTOR and The Old Motherfucking Republic, so yeah, chill out. Bioware isn’t going anywhere. Even if they merge and change their name, the employees aren’t going to commit seppuku, they will still be around. When Black Isle folded we got Obsidian, so ya.
Haha, no. Bioware didn’t decide to rotate the Lead Designer of DA:O, Brent Knowles, to another project. He fucking QUIT. Why? Because he didn’t like the decisions Bioware had been making since they went over to EA, particularly in regards to the decisions they were making about Dragon Age 2.
Fallout has always been a buggy mess. As far as New Vegas went I think, bugs aside, it was a fantastic game. Multiple endings, truly multipath game play, etc – all in all I would say it was a much better game than even Fallout 3 if only for going back to the old endings.
Oh, make no mistake. I freakin’ love New Vegas for what it was intended to be (which is a true Fallout 3 game, considering that the game uses a ton of source material from Van Buren, the original FO3, like I said before), but I find that the game would’ve done better if it had its own engine, and hadn’t been shoved early out the door. For example, an entire DLC pack was made out of a character and the Courier’s backstory that Bethesda cut from the game to push for the release. If it were the old days, then that wouldn’t be a DLC, it’d be in the game from the start.
As for being better than Fallout “3″, that’s not difficult at all. Bethesda’s version of Fallout is about as faithful as a Uwe Boll film adaptation. Sure a lotta names are getting dropped and a few creatures are being shown, but all in all your reaction is “what the fuck did you do to Fallout?” when you’re playing it.
Frankly both Fallout 3 and New Vegas were smooth enough to make Fallout 1 and 2 look like train-wrecks bug wise. I can’t speak for your taste regarding FO3, (it was no FO2 but still damn good IMO) I’m glad the courier’s backstory was left out, mostly because it was tedious dreck on a level with the story for Assassin’s Creed 1. Besides, Obsidian’s record for getting a game finished properly for release is poor at best. NWN2 anyone?
I will agree with you though that DA2 was crushingly disappointing and bares an uncomfortable similarly to the fall of the Ultima franchise.
Fair enough. One thing I will give Fallout 3 credit for was keeping the Fallout 1 feel and theme. It maybe blasphemy but I will say that it may have done a better job at that then even Fallout 2 or Fallout: Tactics – Brotherhood of Steel. Playing back through Fallout 2 really opened my eyes to the fact that the only thing that felt Fallout-ey about it was the Corvega. In Fallout 3 it feels like the fifties, all the way down to the propaganda. If only they had worked a bit harder on Captain LOL-I-Am-Gonna-Stand-At-Medium-Range-From-The-Door-You-Enter-The-Purifier-Through-Wearing-No-Armor-And-Wielding-A-Crappy-Little-Plasma-Pistol as an end boss and the ending being bullshit a bit.
You know how long I’ve heard that natter? Since the bloody 1990′s. People have been whining about how the shooters will kill every other genre for two damn decades now, and counting. Yeah, shooters sell better than other genres because they are simple, fun and easy to play and make. But there’s always room for other kinds of playing experiences, and Bioware’s production in the latter half of the 00′s is a solid proof of that. Don’t write them off over one rushed title. Their ultimate fate is still in the air. But whether they stand and fall, their employees aren’t going to poof out of existence.
As long as there are good professionals and demanding gamers out there, there will be good games out of the mainstream. Some of them will be so good that they garner the mainstream’s interest, as we’ve seen with Mass Effect.
So don’t go predicting doom and gloom, nothing is more annoying. Vote with your wallet, make fun of bad but popular games, appreciate good titles and enjoy yourself for a change.
I just wanted to say that I finished this game (without the patch, mind you), and by the time you got to the final level, you had EARNED the Titans as an easy win. THe Platforming was so hideous, that it just was a relief to have made it to the titan in the first place. I felt so accomplished when I saw the ending, and Ultima IX was like a “WTF?” I agree.
Oreo is a natural LARPer.
Ultima 8 was the first PC game I ever played as it came in a games pack with my PC with Syndicate, Wing Commander 2 and Strike Commander. I thought the game having full speech in the intro was amazing, after having a SNES but quickly found the game to be unplayable. In fact out of the whole pack I only liked Syndicate. That’s pretty bad I suppose but I don’t think I was old enough to work out the complexities of WC2.
I usually don’t like Ultima reviews but this one was great. 9 is going to be interesting…
There was also going to be Ultima 10…the final game that explains what happens after the end of 9…but it never came, and we will assume that…well, wait and find out.
EA- ruining honest to good franchises since floppy disks were around.
Seriously though, EA can suck my metaphorical dick. They completely butt raped the Sims series. I thought this was the only franchise they ever got their hands on to screw up, but now I see they have made it their business model to do so. Ugh! Fucking…FUCK!
Please be merciful as I attempt to make money – hahaha. I haven’t even watched the video and I’m laughing.
The one good thing about Ultima VIII was that the engine was used for the Crusader games, which were awesome.
THANK YOU! I was watching the review thinking “the controls and way the guy moves look so familiar”
I have never played an Ultima, but i loved the Crusader games, especially No Remorse.
EDIT: For some reason this thing decided to post itself elsewhere.
RE-EDIT: ..Okay.. buggy system is buggy.
Hey, quick question about your episode art: do you have fucking Penny Arcade drawing your title cards or something? Looks great! And it’s very appropriate for ya and your site, too! (The whole Penny Arcade-ish look, I mean. lol.)
This takes me back… to the disappointment that the game was. I remember installing it from 10 billion floppies.
The thing that annoyed me the most about floppies is that if one has so much as a tiny, tiny glitch in it during the installation, it crashes, and you can’t even install it.
Yes, we do make backups, but when CD’s came out, they also could play up, and it got worse when the disc’s were copy-protected, meaning if they fail and the return warrenty has expired, you’re screwed.
The hysterical screaming over the exploding chest dumping you backwards into the water is undoubtedly the highlight of this video for me.
and the picture of Spoony in a straight jacket with the catchy song REALLY is a winner!
Is Chuckles still plotting with the Gatecleaner and Pumpkinhead to get revenge on you? Anyway great review!
I’ve made the suspicion that he’s the one who kidnapped Burton.
I would too if he exploded a CD into my face. Poor Chuckles.
This is why I never complain about how long some games take to be released. I’m a huge fan of Starcraft. It took a full year after we expected to see SC2 for it to actually be released, but the gameplay is better for it, and Blizzard constantly updates balance issues. Far better to have a polished game than have it two weeks earlier.
Spoony, I think most of us will agree we don’t mind watching an extra 30 second commercial if it means you can continue bringing us videos. Almost all of us here are here because we honestly enjoy what you do. Of course some of us are just here to troll, but who says you can’t make some money off of them too? Thank you for all the time and effort you put into these videos, and on a more specific note, thank you for reviewing the entire Ultima series, as I really missed this generation of PC games.
I also have some games that I dont use anymore. If you want them, Spoony, let me know.
They are : Star Trek 25th anerversary, Star Trek judgement rites, Star Trek Generations, Monty Python’s complete waste of time, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Ghostbusters 2 and Blade Runner.
We seriously need a wallpaper picture of Spoony in a straight jacket! That picture alone sells the review!
I especially loved the picture (with the music) at the midway point, just before the ad.
I was so caught up in the moment at the midway musical moment that I started dancing with my arms crossed as if in a straight jacket myself. And this is why I really need to quit drinking so much coffee while watching these videos.
To be totally fair, the pentagram on the box isn’t a satanic pentagram. It’s called a pentacle (a pentagram within a circle) and has nothing to do with the devil. If the tip of the pentacle faced downward then it would have been the opposite of the David’s star, which stands for evil.
Either the devs were ignorant or they just printed it wrong, assuming that they actually wanted it to represent evil.
good chance it was a mix of both…
So is the whole Ultima series worth buying?
Honestly, it depends on your age. For those whose idea of old RPGs is Final Fantasy 4 or the original Fallout I would say to avoid it. Modern gamers, the younger ones, probably wouldn’t be able to get into these games, unfortunately. Old games are just harder in every way (oftentimes, in extremely unfair ways since pay to dial tip lines were one of the big ways some older Adventure and RPG titles made their scratch – if you thought piracy was bad these days, you should have seen how easy it was with floppy discs). Hell, I have friends who love Skyrim but can’t stand games like Morrowind because it lacks a marker to show you to your goal – if that is you then I would avoid these games.
That said, if your idea of old games is Zork and Legend of Zelda for the NES or if the sound of a game series that does no hand holding and where a strategy guide is not only acceptable but, in many cases, damn near requisite to play sounds like it appeals or you are something of a gamer historian who wants to get in touch with your roots then I’d say pop a few Xanex and go for it. Just get ready to get frustrated and take a chill attitude. Even getting the damn things to work on DOS is part of the challenge with this era of gaming.
The Ultima (not necessarily the UO) community is very helpful in this regard. Ultima IV is a definite must try.
Hmm funny how the avatar in there looks almost the same as the Avatar from Dungaon Keeper.
Fantastic video once again. Though I must admit, the in-video ads are annoying. The Nostalgia Critic does jokes to transition in and out of them, and even that is getting annoying. But I understand you wanting to make a bit more money, especially with your hiatus recently.
Looking forward to Ultima 9! Are you gonna do Ultima Online too?
Miles playing with Oreo made this video.
EA: a proud tradition of releasing half finished games by unrealistic deadlines.
I think Pagan was their inspiration for Origin.
REVIEW WOW THE RPG (D&D 4e)
if you look under his vlogs section you will find his reviews on dnd 4th edition
also, WOW already had a tabletop RPG. It came with the success of the original Warcraft and died apon release of the BC.(just had to throw that out their)
did not know this. thanks but i probably will never do anything with this info :)
Man, Spoony’s review of Ultima 9 is gonna be the best Christmas present I’ve had in a while. Let’s just hope that’s enough time for him to get it done.
Well, was it worth it, EA?
It sure looks like it.
Say, anyone know who was running EA back then?
Just for, you know..
If their current business practices are any indication, it’s likely the same person who runs EA today
He used to work for Johnson & Johnson and Clorox…
Spent a couple of years at Activision, jumped to EA, and essentially took over EA in 1991…
Larry Probst, “And to be very honest, I don’t spend a lot of time playing games. I spend a lot of time watching people play games. My most favorite games tend to be the ones selling the best at that moment.”
I’m not only the president of the hair club for men, I also watch people who are clients…
Are you planing on killing this titan to absorb his powers ?
This is the reason why games should take a while to be released. One thing I learned from Spoony’s review of the Ultima series is that this series was a big inspiration for the creation of the Elder Scroll series. I researched it myself, and after you think about it, the elder scrolls looks heavily inspired from this series.
It is really good that Bethesda took a while to release skyrim. That game is absolutely gorgeous. Let us hope the elder scrolls series remains fresh and great and won’t fall like the ultima series.
Good luck with Ultima 9 Spoony. I think you need it!
Seriously, I have been watching these Ultima reviews now since you started in waiting for when you would finally get to review IX. It’s been quite a while but I have a feeling it’s totally gonna be worth it :D
So for Spoony, Ultima IX was the ultimate betrayal?
More than Highlander II?
More than the Wing Commander movie?
More than X-Com?
More than Final Fantasy VIII?
…..Oh god, that’s gonna be one hell of a video.
I like when reviewers write into their reviews add breaks, as long as they do they don’t bother me. Just feel cheapened when the cut is oviouesly a 2nd thought.
I fell out of my chair laughing at the part where you were in the Asylum.
What song plays just before the credits roll for the last few minutes? As in, before it cuts back to spoony, when he’s killing the demons. It’s so good.
As in, before it cuts back to spoony, when he’s killing the demons.
Nono, before that one. Before the credits, when he’s using the items to end the titans.
Ah. Yeah… No clue.
I didn’t think the plot was terrible as a child, the platforming was unbearable unpatched of course, and making the spells in the sorcery portion was a fiddly pain in the ass because the reagents had to be in just the perfect spot (same issue with the obsidian pieces on the ethereal plain at the end of gameplay BTW). I’m surprised he glossed over the cheat room and the amusements one can have using the cheat mode. Also, my personal favorite, Flame Sting, the sword that makes things explode into flames.
Spoony, put as many commercials in as you like. I’ll still watch your stuff, likely more than once.
DUDE. that song is in Startropics. I FUCKING LOVE YOU
So EA have always been moneygrubbing bastards? Thought it was something new but this is proof they’ve always been run by satan.
Put as many commercials as you have to/want in, Spoony. I’ve been watching your stuff solidly (and for free) for the best part of 2 years now. I don’t mind them at all. I actually really like how you and Doug are handling them by turning them into part of the review…Though that may get old/you may run out of ideas eventually I guess. As long as it’s not a jarring interruption in the middle of a sentence I don’t think the vast majority of people will give a damn, though. Anyone who does is a selfish asshole.
One thing I don’t like, though, is how it exits fullscreen after the ad breaks stop, meaning I have to stop being a lazy fuck for 5 seconds of my life to get up and full screen it again. Any way round that?
I just tried to visit the site and got some weird admin box that asked for username and password spoony, just thought Id let you know.
It even asked are you the avatar or something lol.
OK good that wasn’t just me that happened too
Thank God it wasn’t just be experiencing that.
I got that too. Obviously I’m not the “Goddamn” Avatar so I closed it immediately. Only Master Spoony can use that admin box.
I’d just like to say, that while Spoony’s criticism is on the mark, this was the game that got me interested in RPGs. My experience with computer RPGs was with static screens and a lot of text, in another words the games seemed very boring. In Ultima 8 I was tranfered to a mysterious world, where I could interact with the enviroment and seemingly go anywhere I pleased, also the game looked very good for it’s time.
I can understand how apalling this game is to an older Ultima or RPG gamer, but to those of us just getting into the genre it was a damn good game. I might have never tried Fallout or Baldur’s Gate series without playing this one first.
Did you like Fallout and/or Baldur’s Gate more than Ultima VIII?
8 was the first one I played, I was so hooked after that that I finished every single one of the other games (except 6, fuck 6!).
I even played AKalabeth world of doom for a bit.
Long live Ultima VIII!
Spoony, awesome to see you back making review videos!
I was worried for a moment…O_O
Still waiting on the conclusion video for that FFX-2 review :)
If I had money, I’d give it to you. Unfortunately, I have to handle getting food/water/shelter for myself first before I do other things. Borrowed laptop, borrowed public wifi, I’m just glad they don’t filter it like most other places.
Get some merchandising going! Talk to people who have worked with other independent producers of content in order to get an idea of what works. Plenty of things you can sell like mugs, T-shirts, and so on. The AVGN is selling plushies! Why don’t you have plushies!?
How many female fans of your show would love a plushie!!!???
Show as many adverts as you want, I’ll gladly watch all of em, just make sure they’re part of the video and it’ll work fine :)
Everyone needs help sometimes from family/friends, don’t be afraid to ask!
I’ve made the offer before but I’ll do it again. Send me FFX-2 and I’ll suffer through it to get you whatever footage you need. I’d even be willing to help edit/format/compress the videos if you need assistance with that.
Offer not valid on Mondays or Tuesdays.
You can survive it ’cause you got nerves of steel.
No, he can survive it because his vision is augmented.
don’t trust this guy! i asked him for a drink once.
i vanted owang.
he gave me lemon lime.
The machine would not make a mistake. Maybe your hand slipped.
Someone get Spoony away from this game right now.
*dramatic cry* Won’t somebody PLEASE think of the children!
…I can’t believe it took 6 days for me to finally come-up with that joke. *sigh*
spoony will you review baldurs gate here a link to the game
So THAT’S why people keep walking up and punching me all the time…
More Ultima, excellent, I look forward to 9. Commercials I have no problem with, I took the one on this video as my official ‘grab a beer’ intermission.
What is the sad music when the avatar was killing the children again, I just can’t remember it’s name and I didn’t find it in the credits.
Pretty sure that’s the theme from Platoon.
Samuel Barber – Adagio for Strings
Wow, that was a long one! Thanks, Spoony. I don’t mind the commercials, but have you ever considered implementing some sort of subscription service for ad-free content to people who donate a certain amount? I don’t know how hard that would be for you to add, or even if it would be more profitable than the ads right now, I just thought I’d ask.
Great to see that you are back making more in-depth videos and returning to the Ultima series. I really enjoyed this series and was wondering if you were going to return to some of the cheesy FMVs; maybe 7th guest or 11th hour?
Hey…I used to love 7th Guest :P I was totally blown away at the time with the environments and graphics…pretty weak looking back, but damn were those puzzle’s fun.
Both were enjoyable puzzle games, however you have to admit that the actors in the fmv scenes were chewing on the scenery like a bunch of starving hyenas.
Spoony you should put a 10 second video in of you just doing something random, and put an Ad for every second. It’ll be your little support video. I’m not sure if that’ll work, but just throwing the idea out there.
Ah yes, BBS’s, there was nothing more enjoyable than navigating around DOS-like environments on other peoples computers. We used to play this game on a local school BBS called “Barney Splat” in which you’d go about brutally murdering Barney the Dinosaur by doing things like putting up piano wire during bike races and so forth. The good ol’ days, before basic GUI
He has the imps from Zero Punctuation! In the bottom right corner.
I need to see 9
and I’m not going to look up any info on it til you post it
ahhhhhh what could it be like
like… hmmm, without spoiling anything, imagine you have a favorite soft drink,
and one day they bring out a new flavor. You buy it, and it tastes like licking
the inside of a public urinal and gives
you violent diarrhea.
Ultima 9 is
when the same company brings out another new flavor and tells you that this one
really is totally awesome and tasty, and you have your suspicions, but hey,
they made great stuff before and what are the odds that they screw up two times
in a row? So, like a fucking moron, you buy another can and find out the hard
way that it’s drain cleaner mixed with ground glass and cooling water from a
nuclear power plant, because someone in upper management has apparently gone
insane and figured murdering the entire customer base and running the entire company into the fucking ground would be a great
got a little carried away there. Yeah, it is really, really bad, and its worse
because the series was so damn good for the most part.
The late 90′s really were a depressing time to be an RPG gamer. Ultima taken behind a shed and shot, Might and Magic went tits up, and Wizardry died. Only good RPG experience to come out of that dark time was Baulders Gate.
Fallout 1 and 2 were also good rpgs of that era.
Love how Oreo’s jumping up at the end :p
I don’t understand why everyone talks about the ads in this video. I don’t see any. I have addblock plus and I’m just wondering if it isn’t used in the States. Or can one even use it in there?
Yes, adblock does indeed exist here, the problem is that by using it, you are preventing Spoony or any of the other awesome reviewers from making any revenue, which is akin to robbing the site. Don’t know if you knew that, but you are, which is bad given Spoony and all the others do this shit for free…
Kind of sad that everyone’s whining about them, no one really whines on Youtube and yet they have like eight times the ads. Given that it’s only like three 30 second commercials, all of which can be muted, ya’ll whining should really suck it up.
Oh ok. I always wondered that. Anyway: not gonna turn off ABP on my home computer. At my workplace you can’t use add blockers so my contribution will come from watching these videos when I have the time during work hours :D
And yeah, the whining sucks. That’s why I always wondered about it because I didn’t see any adds. And if one hates them so much one also CAN turn them off.
What confuses me is that i see banner adds and such, and all the adds on youtube, yet blip videos have no adds for me, which sucks, as i do want to click them at least once to help spoon out.
i have no adblockers on, so what is the problem?
Who did the Spoony Bogard art in the background that looks awesome.
I hope you do an extra one about Ultima Onilne down the road
That was a good review Spoony.
By the way there a Ultima remake, Ultima Lazarus, I found online, it looks neat, maybe you check it out.
I second that! Spoony needs to play and review Lazarus as well. Anyone else with me here?
I don’t know about you, but I’d rather see Ultima 9 next, not X-2
we all know why and in how many ways X-2 is bad, but not too many people know about Ultima 9
I’d be happy to see him ditch the X-2 review, it’s kind of beating a dead horse.
Sounds kind of like Sonic 06. And ANY game that can be compared to Sonic 06 is going to be godawful.
No, Ultima *9* is like Sonic 06. Ultima 8 is more like Sonic 06 if they had an additional 6 months of development time.
Actually, I take that back. Ultima 8 is like Sonic06, because Ultima 9 is *worse* than that. At least you could play Sonic06 (not that that’s a good idea, mind you). I recall Ultima 9 described as something to the effect of:
A game where bugs compete, gladiatorial style, to be the first to crash the program.
See, Sonic06 you can actually play from beginning to end without a crash. If you can get through Ultima9 *at all*, it’s an accomplishment.
I really love Spoony’s take on the Ultima series. It’s such a throwback. I live in latin America and I got Ultima Underworld for free with my first pentium computer and I was like “WTF is this?” I Never knew it had such an array of titles and story behind it.
what is the tune that starts playing at 25 minutes? I really like it.
Thanks much for this video. I hope to see more. Go Spoony!
This review was a lot of fun. Spoony really managed to encapsulate the frustration and anger that my 15 year old self had with Ultima 8
I like spoony ,but his reviews are getting less and less.The pagan was posted on the 31st January and the date is 14 feburary now….a two week gap thats just to long.
I don’t see that as a problem. Considering it takes time to work on a review (especially games) and having a personal life as well, it is quite understandable.
It is understandable, but not necessarily acceptable. Reality isn’t that tame, and if he is going to keep this pace he will lose his fans someday. That’s the thing that worries me. I don’t mind taking time for his videos, but I fear the day when no one sees his reviews and finally shuts his website. I fear the day when I can no longer watch his hilarious reviews.
Quite frankly, it is not something I would worry about. Hell, there is websites where the updates are even rarer than Spoony’s one and it’s still up and active. And it’s for months, or maybe years.
It may be unacceptable, but then again I do not expect anybody to respect a release schedule for something being done on free time.
Its not free time..hes getting paided for his time with ad money.
So? He may get paid with ad money, but he still do reviews on his free time.
And you somehow have a claim to his free time right ?
You are kidding, right?
The fact that Spoony do the review in his free time don’t mean that you have a right to it for free and on demand.
So no, I am not kidding and you guys are obnoxious for pressuring him to meet a weekly deadline.
I never said otherwise, lol.
It’s their job for the ones like TGWTG (Doug) Angry Joe, and Spoony…
lol at “paided”
All the more reason why I don’t question his decisions. Any gap between reviews potentially costs Spoony money, or even sponsors now and in the future. He’s been doing this Internet-video thing for a while now, so I’m sure he knows all that and considers it when making business decisions (Because that’s what they are). Maybe Spoony is of the belief that making mediocre videos to meet a weekly deadline wouldn’t please his fans any more than forcing them to wait. Maybe he prefers this kind of unstructured freelance work precisely because he’d rather not work on someone elses schedual and is willing to take a pay-cut to keep his life free and easy. As for the fear that revenue loss might kill the experiment. Keeping a site on the interwebs is actually suprisingly cheap, so the site itself isn’t going away. Been to homestarrunner.com lately? We just passed the first aniversary of nothing but the site is still there.
i beleive hes working on the cinema snob movie
It is somewhat disappointing, though he is trying to get back on top of things.
Plus, this is a finale. I’m just hoping it’s going to be better than his rather tame rendition of FFX (er, FFX-1?)
Are you ready to sponsor the Experiment ?
It is easy to bitch about it, if you care then you should ship in.
I miss Rebruary…
I keep coming back hoping to see a new Spoony vid posted…
When is the next one due?
I haven’t seen so many explosions seance Golden Eye on the N64
Watching this video for the fifth time (I know … I lead a boring life), and I JUST noticed that he has two Zero Punctuation Imp plushies on his right shelf o_O
What was that Headless thing at the end? I don’t think I’ve seen the Spoony video where it was first shown.
Check out the Ultima Underworld 2 vid.
This was funny, I can’t wait to see how amazing the the Ascension episode is going to be.
I just had a thought; if Pagan is already under the Guardians control, why doesn’t he just order everyone on the face of that world to go and hunt you down? Surely he would want to ensure that the Avatar has as little chance as he possible could to escape, would he not?
Apparently he did, but it’s just kids who wanted to kill him. :P
2:08 – BOOM! Hail Satan!
Yeah….I can imagine how awkward that would have been for young Noah…
this makes me love being a satanist.
Nothing like the smell of sacrificed children in the morning, eh?
Who else here thinks the Spoony One should go on and review Ultima V: Lazrus when he’s done with U9? If you haven’t played it, check out http://www.u5lazarus.com .
No because he already reviewed U5. A fan-made copy in another games engine isn’t worth mentioning for more than a “This exists, check it out or don’t”.
Looking forward to the next Ultima vid. At least with those, you know what you’re talking about.
Re-watching this review made me think; I had no idea how much a game could be so un-finished. I mean I was one of the biggest critics of Knights of the Old Republic 2: The Sith Lords, an-other extraordinarily rushed and not finished RPG, and I thought that was worst it could get for rushed games. I feel really bad with all my moaning and complaining when compared to the experience that Spoony described. Ultima fans have it way worst. You guys and gals have my sympathies :(
Although I am really looking forward to the Ultima 9. :D
So if I said that, ultimatly (no pun), EA ruined Ultima would any of you agree or think that it takes two to ruin the tango?
It took both companies to ruin the series but sometimes I wonder if it wasn’t Origin that ruined the old-New EA as it applies to their acquisitions. Hmmm?
What’s the name of the music playing at 23:03?
What does this music have to do with this part?
It’s funeral music.
In this case, it represents the death of the virtues the avatar stood for.
H O L Y
S H I I I I I I I I I T
I don’t get how people didnt assume this game was some sort of conspiracy at that point, to put people off gaming and try to convince not so sound minded people that games truly are evil. There appears to be 0 limitation to how something can fall so low in this situation. It is nice to have Spoony throw some perspective on the term dissapointment, I suddenly feel better about every single thing I ever wasted time doing in my life.
Since your doing all the other Ultima games you should do the “Lord of Ultima game”
The Avatar is one of the many video game characters who suffer every day from Tommy Vercetti Syndrome. TVS kills hundreds of characters each day! But with your donations we can ease their pain. Just 17¢ a day can help to end the menace of 2ft pools of standing water. Don’t let the characters you love struggle under the burden of TVS; call now.
The part when Spoony dubs the serpents never fails to make me laugh haha.
Yeah, this reminded me how bad Ultima VIII was. In truth, I wanted to love it. I did think that the box was the best of them all, but oh, the pain of jumping.
I’m surprised that you didn’t mention the unreleased add-on, The Lost Vale, and how it was supposed to connect the unfinished areas of the game, like the door to nowhere. I am glad that you mentioned the speech pack, which was only one more damn disk, but they charged almost as much as a full game.
It may be also worth mentioning that the guy who does the voice of Guardian is also the guy who played Leatherface, in Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2.
As far as I remember, nobody said in U8 that Pagan is the Guardian’s world, it was first said in U9. With some other things I heard, it seems Ultima VIII: Pagan (and then Ultima IX: Ascension) could very well be completely different…
See, it was so first that Pagan is just one of the world the Guardian conquered (method can be learned ingame), the white place in the end must be the Void (kinda similar to U9′s Void, with the ground mist) and U9 would have taken place in the Guardian’s world (with Britannia already detsroyed, or being half-destroyed awaiting restoration…), it’s just fans really wanted to see Britannia once again (U7-1 and UU2 were too long ago).
Companions would have been possible by having Pagan people get to know you and eventually travel together, just the jumping/climbing would have been kinda difficult then… As for jumping, it’s really bad, but the climbing would be exciting (with better controls), since I always thought it exciting to get on seemingly unwalkable/blocked off areas, and this climbing feature gave me just that.
In the end, this is the only Ultima game I don’t like. I’m still happy I got till the Sorcery part (stopped after running out of ingredients a cruel CRUEL way) and there were some fun parts (mostly the expectation and the excitement that I would see something great… expectation failed though), but hey, I probably won’t ever replay it.
Interesting ending to the review… seems like the Ultima IX review will hit hard… it was the first Ultima game I played and ever heard about… I still remember unboxing it at Christmas at my grandmother… And I know there’s a lot to talk about that… I’m really looking forward to that review…
It will be the coronation of my Ultima gaming history!!!!
Since I haven’t played Ultima, I cannot speak with certainty, but I believe that Ultima IX can’t be worse than an unplayable game like VIII.
Oh it can and it is.
It absolutely is.
But why? Is it also unplayable?
Or is it just the BETRAYAL factor?
Spoony takes so long to release the video.
It’s so buggy and crashy that you pretty much can’t play it at all.
This is an insult, I’m from 92, and we used Floppy discs to transfer school projects…
Are you being serious? He said “for those of you who don’t know what a floppy disc is”, as in not addressing it at people who do. Jeez I’d almost think you were trying to find something to complain about, and yes I used them too but then I was born in 87.
I get it now…. it was EA… and I thought Dragon Age was the only RPG EA destroyed
Link exploding was freaking hilarious spoony xD
Oh God, I remember U9… I actually gave U8 a pass when it came out because, reading the box, it was obvious that it was JUST A SIDE STORY. Nothing to do with Britannia. Nothing to do with much of anything, except being the Guardian sending you on a wild goose chase.
Then, U9, I was SO STOKED — and within 5 minutes of actual gameplay, I was looking at the world from underneath. *facepalm* So incredibly, horribly, broken…
Only the best from EA!
Like ME3! Oh wait.
It’s been a while since this post came out, and I cannot help but be worried for the Spoony One.
Consider that his column contributions since January have included a new feature dedicated to mental pain, and training his dog for war. I grow ever more concerned at the possible side effects of reviewing Part 9.
Perhaps I’ll see if I can get an update from Burton in the code. Be strong Noah!
ORIGIN, BioWare… same story, same sad ending (badum tsss).
My opinion: Ultima went downhill after V.
An entire game made like the ending to mass effect 3 … spoony i pity you, and EA deserves to be burned, poisoned, choped to pieces and alot of other horible means of torture and killing. EA must be destroyed. I would propose everyone not buying any games distributed by EA, but again a lot of developers would be dragged under too. And of course alot of people would still fall for ther advertising. I think it is to late to kill EA. And so they’ll continue to ruin games, developers and reputation for years and years to come.
So… where is the Ultima 9 Ascension Retrospect? *ducks*
I believe it is currently in editing
It’s like the platforming segment made Spoony have Tourette’s Syndrome.
I figured out why I like this review so much and the whole retrospective, the timing.
When was there In Loving Color in the review? Did I miss something?
in the title card Spoony kinda looks like Shaggy from Scooby Doo
The killing of large groups of kids is in several Ultimas. It was put in as an easter egg after some people complained to Richard Garriot that killing kids is possible in his games.
This is the first video I ever seen of Spoony and I swear I have been hooked on this guy ever since!!!! I fucking love the Spoony Experiment and everything else that he does and you should to!
P.S.: “Im the GOD DAMN AVATAR!”
I have to say this remind me to play diablo 2 I glad it did not turn out like this… hehe EA they ruin there games :P
Love how the Avatar looks like Dirk the Daring wearing an obnoxious bucket helm on his head.
I keep checking the site every day for Ultima 9, even though I know I shouldn’t torture myself like that. I never get bored of watching the other Ultima reviews though, especially this one. I keep noticing new stuff.
This was the first time I waited until after the credits on this one. Oreo is awesome.
yeah the old days of floppy discs. i remeber when the 2MB floppy came about in limited numbers and it blew my mind.
My favorite part: “I keep overshooting the fucking COCKSUCKER!”
Wow, didn’t know you were into that. :p
I’m kidding, of course. Great review.
About grinding spells for intellingence and beating the shit out of plot critical NPCs for strength and shit – HOLY DAMN, IT’S OBLIVION
I JUST realized the “spooning with spoony Vol. 19″ on his shelf in the opening video.
I don´t give a shit about Ultima, but I love these reviews.
A “Bulletin Board System”? How do you start those things?
actually when a pentagram has a pint upwards, it cant be interpreted as a christian symbol representing the 5 wounds of jesus upon a cross.
the upside down petagram was used in pagan cultures as summoning circles or spells of healing.
it wasnt until those weirdos in the 70s and 80s started making it offensivly evil and black metal of course ruins something by misinterpreting it. (like the upside cross actually being st. peters cross when he felt unworthy of dieing the same way as jesus.)
so it makes sense that the cover looks that way since you are on PAGAN.
This is the most tightly edited, well executed game review I think I’ve ever seen. Most Spoony videos are great (especially the Ultima series), but I’m not sure if this can be topped.
“Also remember where they all are, along with all your money, your potions, your weapons,
your armor, your spellbooks, your wands, your keys, your scrolls, your
gemstones, your spear, your spear, your spear, your spear, your spear,
Love Max Romeo and the Upsetters.
thankyou thankyou thankyou, I don’t really care that people wanta put midrolls in their videos but for the love of god try and tie it into the video itself like this, that makes the midroll so much better
“Your strenght goes up as long as you hit something, so just hit someone weak, who cant die, for 1 hour”
“To max out you magical powers, just use a spell until you are out of mana, rest 1 hour, and repeat…”
Hmm, just where do i know that from? Well, must be some old, broken game…
We can understand that both Ultima 8 and 9 are abominations because of one specific company… EA. We really need to find a way to kick those guys out of the gaming business, those lazyasses need to leave.
Well anyways, this review was great but the ending was so cute! Kick that headless’s ass oreo! That dog is a badass and cuteness combined
Just gonna say really quickly, I’m okay with the commercials Spoony. I know I’m helping you out, so I’m cool with them. =3 (I had ad blocker installed so I didn’t even realize I was supposed to be seeing them till you made the note here at the bottom of the video, So I went ahead and deactivated it for your website. =3) Keep on doing what you do!
I just finished all the ultima vids. and I got to say, im glad i didn’t play them or I would have murdered someone for the 9th entry. I like the videos up to six more because you can actually see and feel how good these games where. but from what I saw in 9, that cant be the canon ending, it feels more like an elseworld ending and ultima 8 feels as the true ending where the avatar failed and everything went to hell. not good, but better then 9.
Wow, no ranting about what a royal PAIN IN THE ASS the magic system was. How if you don’t have the reagent on the EXACT RIGHT PIXLE your spell won’t work….
He rants about the magic system.
lol, after serpent isle i was so psyched for ultima 8 and then this crepfest. i didn’t complete the game, i didn’t even get to the necromancer-part. i think i gave up in one of the first areas with the platform jumping. after that i was so shocked and angry I didn’t even play ultima 9 – it was probably for the better.
BETRAYAL! BETRAYAL!! BETRAYED ME!!! THIS GAME SUCKS!!!!
Just one word: Awesome! :) Thanks for bringing back the bad memories of unpatched U8!
Spoony, you are a GOD on the internet.
Really funny, I enjoyed that, especially the reggae song at the end.
Pagan and the Speech Pack on floppy was the first Ultima game I bought for my first PC in ’94 and I liked it. The isometric graphics are far better than the top-down view. And the patch fixed a lot of the movement problems. I just got the whole lot from GOG and I find the older ones very dated-looking and as I have no nostalgia factor for them they are difficult to get in to. A lot of people tell me Ultima VII was the best, but I think I need the Exult mod to make it playable.
But, yeah, a lot of fair comment on Ultima VIII.
Really funny! But notice that Pagan inspired a lot of other games like Diablo and Baldur’s Gate. Yeah, he is the grandpa!
Fun etymological note: “Pagan” comes from the Latin word for “hick” or “redneck”.
Early Christianity (and Judaism, for that matter) was primarily an urban religion in the Roman Empire and found many of its converts among the urban elite and intelligentsia, whereas the people outside the cities generally still followed their various old religions. So, much the way modern urbanites sneer at the rural Christians of today, the ancient urban Christians sneered at the rural pagans of their day.
Every time someone calls themselves a “pagan” or “neo-pagan” today, I can’t help but chuckle at what they are unwittingly self-identifying as. Sort of like how “Cynic” comes from the Greek word for “dog-like”.
Ahah, that is so funny mate. I can’t stop laughing, so funny, please stop! Ohoh, how could have kept such a gem from the rest of the world, for so long?… Wait, who call themselves Pagans? Hipsters? Anyways, I am dog-like: I want sex, food and sleep. The only human part, is that I stay philosophical about the whole thing. Anything I do, that doesn’t result in either of these things, are irrational.
At this very moment, my childhood burns.
Is that the sweet song of lamentation I hear?
We must destroy EA.
I actually wish that game companies would quit adding spoken word tracks to big RPGs. It’s a lot of time and money that causes gameplay to suffer. Imagine the kinds of open worlds or even universes we could have without the oppressive pressures of AAA development.
I can dream…
I think that Noah had said the f-word and its variations at least 50 times in this video. Isn’t that a little excessive?
Kind of par for the course with internet reviewers, I find. Spoon’s actually one of the more restrained ones in that part at least.
This review involves EA. Using the F-word only 50 times where EA is involved is actually a rather good example of self-control. >.>
Actually I find that talking about EA allows me to brush up on obscenities in dead languages. Goodness knows I’ve told E(verything) A(sinine) to F themselves in every language I know….
PS: Never speak EA’s name in Sumerian aloud.
PSS: When someone asks if you’re a god…you say ‘YES’.
You have my deepest respect for researching obscenities in dead languages, an example I intend to use to guide me. Hitherto I have mainly denounced Electronic Farts in modern languages.
To PS 1: I consider myself duly warned.
To PS 2: My usual reply to that one is “Yes, but mainly on Tuesdays and Saturdays.”
one thing though is, how did you count that
I counted them in my head.
thats one heck of a way to spend 30 minutes. hats off to you dude
“I banish you to the world of P….. umpkinhead.”
*Pumpkinghead flips you the bird*
Oreo is seriously the cutest weapon in your arsenal.
Oreo Slayer of The Headless